A funny joke about the quarrel between husband and wife

A funny joke about the quarrel between husband and wife

Funny jokes about husband and wife quarreling. The funny thing is that human beings take the initiative to seek happiness and pay more attention to finding happiness from life and peace. The least in life is jokes. Jokes are the adjustment of our life, which makes us feel good every day. The following is a funny joke about the quarrel between husband and wife.

Funny jokes about couples quarreling 1 1. You don't have to buy anything when you get married, but you have to pay for one thing yourself.

This thing is a bed. In case the young couple quarrel, you can confidently tell him, "I bought this bed, so get out of here."

2. A couple quarreled and divorced. Speaking of sons. Man: "My son belongs to me because I am the father." Woman: "My son is mine, because I gave birth to him." Man: "Can you have a baby without me?" The woman thought for a moment: "You just provided a sperm. When my son grows up, I will let him return it to you. " Man: ...

I just saw someone in Sichuan being scolded by her husband and going back to Jiangsu after quarreling. Tell me about me. I am a stranger in a foreign land. Every time my girlfriend comes home with me, I won't quarrel with her, just for fear that she will feel bullied outside alone. ...

Well, I admit I dare not quarrel with her anywhere. ...

can't afford to offend ...

4. My wife and I quarreled on the phone, and it was very noisy. At this time, I heard the message prompt. Remind me after reading it that the salary of China Merchants Bank has arrived. I immediately shouted into the phone: "Shit, my uncle got paid today. If I don't go home, I'll be angry when I go back to see you. You fucking reflect on me at home. "

I hung up the phone, feeling awesome, and suddenly something was wrong. Shit, I forgot she had a pay card. Listen to me, wife, that's not me!

Forget it. Go back and see if you can get in.

5, two couples quarrel, wife: I must find a prince charming in my next life, and Zhang Yinghe will make a fortune.

6. One day, my husband and wife had a big fight.

At this time, the child ran over and said, "Stop!"

I feel very comforted. The child has grown up and is sensible! I know. I'll stop for the adults!

Who knows this Xiong Haizi waved his hand in the air and shouted again: "Go! Come on, come on! "

7. I got up in the morning and heard a quarrel on the fifth floor.

Go up and have a look. It turns out that Mr. Wang and boss Li next door are fighting on the fifth floor.

Boss Li is obviously at a disadvantage. Everyone is pulling Mr. Wang. I saw Mr. Wang pointing a kitchen knife at Boss Li and scolding him: "I don't like this kind of person who beats children in the early morning."

Funny jokes about couples quarreling 2 1. One day, my husband and wife quarreled, which was really fierce.

I quarreled with my girlfriend, and she went back to the bedroom crying.

My wife and I once quarreled about how a person who won the 1000W lottery ticket should spend money.

The wife shouted at her husband, "I finally know you now, you are a selfish guy!" You always keep your mouth shut. My wife, my oil painting, my salary, my ... everything seems to be not yours at home. Remember, if you don't get rid of this bad habit, I'll divorce you ... Hey, what are you rummaging through in the closet? ! I'm looking for our pants. The husband replied.

I once argued with LG about what a oval face is and what a round face is. He said that Fan Bingbing had a round face and Zhao Wei had an oval face. I don't think anyone with eyes thinks so, but he stubbornly thinks so. I was so angry that I finally broke a cup and cursed him viciously!

6. A colleague quarreled with her husband.

7. Today, when my husband came back from a business trip, I suddenly felt the desire for love! So I asked shyly, how are you going to torture me when my husband comes back?

8. I went to work this morning and became the focus as soon as I entered the office-my faces were all together.

9. Get up in the morning and hear a quarrel on the fifth floor.

10, Motshar sympathizes with the "football widow". Once, a woman asked him how to shift her husband's attention from TV to her, and he replied, "Wear transparent clothes." "What if this doesn't work?" She asked. "Then recite a number!" Shaer replied.

1 1. Speaking of my parents, my father is a super good-natured person.

12, I have an idiot wife at home, and she doesn't talk when she is angry, which makes me even more angry!

13. Once upon a time, there was a man named Daxiong. When he was dying, he called his wife to the bed and warned her: "After I die, don't steal people casually, otherwise, every time you steal someone, I will roll on the ground!" ! "Speak, male will die!

14, quarreled with my husband yesterday. When quarreling, I like to say and repeat.

15 I know a couple who quarreled for a week in one day, first because they were in love with Haiyuan, then because of Platycodon grandiflorum and Ge Wei, and finally because they were with Shengu Xun.

16, at night, a couple was lying in bed. The husband patted his wife on the shoulder and began to rub her arm. The wife turned around and said, honey, I'm sorry. I'm going to see a gynecologist tomorrow. I want to keep clean. The husband was rejected, so he turned to get ready for bed. But after a few minutes, the husband turned around and started patting his wife on the shoulder. This time, he leaned close to her ear and asked softly, "Are you going to see the dentist tomorrow, too?"

17, a friend in Changsha found a girlfriend in Taiwan Province Province, and quarreled with dogs every time because of Taiwan Province Province.

Funny jokes about husband and wife quarreling 3 1. A couple quarreled. After dinner, the husband went to the bedroom to rest. The wife went to the bedside and found a piece of paper on the small table beside her, which said, "Mom, wake me up at seven in the morning. -the baby's father. "

The next morning, the husband woke up and found that it was almost eight o'clock-he looked up and saw an extra piece of paper on the table and took it. It says, "Dad, get up. It's seven o'clock. -the mother of the child. "

2. Two women are communicating. A: "My family has an unwritten rule that couples should make up before going to bed anyway."

B: "Good rules. Did you do it? "

A: "I did it! I remember once, we didn't sleep for two or three days ... "

3. After the husband and wife quarreled, the husband scolded: "You should remember that at any time, men's thinking is right and their judgments are accurate, while women are just the opposite!"

"Yes, it is absolutely right for you to choose me as your wife, but it is a big mistake for me to choose you as my husband!"

On the platform of the station, a couple are complaining to each other. The husband looked at the second bus that had left and said to his wife, "It's all your fault! If you hadn't dawdled, we would have taken this train. "

"It's all your fault!" The wife replied, "If you hadn't been urging us, we wouldn't have spent a lot of time waiting for the next train."

5. One night, a couple were quarreling. ......

Dave: OK, stop it. You will disturb your neighbors in the middle of the night.

Wife (argumentative): At five o'clock in the evening, it is obviously 2: 30 in the middle of the night. Why three o'clock?

After quarreling for a while, the husband felt that his wife was unreasonable and slapped her in the face!

The wife shouted: help, you killed someone in the middle of the night!

Husband: I'll tell you why you were beaten in the middle of the night.