Hurry up, someone gave me some jokes, which are not classic.

1, boy, dare to hit on my girl! Tell me, is it a one-on-one fight or a group fight? We beat you one by one. One-on-one, you choose us! My grandmother is still in the countryside. Since I was admitted to Tsinghua, my grandmother always said to me every time I went back, "I'll keep the plots of land at home and this yard, and these chickens and pigs for you." . Seeing the employment situation this year, I finally realized my grandmother's foresight and good intentions ... 3. Summer is coming and the weather is very hot. A group of "BT" flies to the north, forming a "B" for a while and a "T" for a while ... 4. It is too late to steal the clock, but we should never leave it. It is not a problem, as a symbol of our love. You are stupefied, a cow knife can't kill a chicken. You can be sharp-edged in the spring, besiege the state of Wei to save Zhao, goodbye very much, Eight Teeth and Lu, and a thousand miles of Chanjuan ... 5. Recently, your boyfriend looks good ~/He goes to bbs to irrigate every day! I poured water with my ID again. What about yours? /Let my dad use it! I told my girlfriend that you also went to the alumni record to fill in the water. Hey, people will find bbs! Bbs, not bad! There are many MM and PP, and we have been watering there! Studying our major and playing games every day are not bad. With this bbs, hi! Really worthy of our computer! Bbs, tomorrow! /bbs, pour every day! 6. Successful men are busy with JB during the day and JB at night; A loser has nothing to do during the day and nothing to do at night. So, I want to be a successful man! 7. Summary of awards over the years: On April 29th 1985, I received a small red flower, which was personally presented by Grandma Zhao. 65438+June 1 0998, won the highest progress award once, and was given a notebook by Teacher Liu; One day in 2000, he won the newcomer award of the class basketball team and was praised orally by Zhang Tianguang. 200 1 12 18, once won the Beijing computer sports lottery, and the handsome guy gave 5 yuan a bonus. 8. (BBS of a university in Anhui) Monks spend their time looking at the moon, while dinosaurs sit on the ground and become immortals. 9. Confucius traveled eastward. When he met two children quarreling, he asked him why. A child said: I was born in Shandong, Japan, so I belong to the East. A child said: When the sun goes down, it is clear that Japan belongs to Shanxi, so it belongs to the West. Confucius couldn't make up his mind, so he asked Laozi (that is, me) later. Lao Tzu said with a smile, who is more Zhihu than you? Japan has no foundation, how to calculate! ! 10, anti-theft, anti-logistics ... 1 1, computer is my first wife. Face the first wife every day, and one day the third wife hangs up the internet and is the second wife-> Second wife-> The second wife is broken-> I finished Shui Mu because my third wife visited my third wife and the first wife sold 12. For single girls, I always strive for it; I never give up married women; For girls over sixteen, I pay attention to digging; For children under sixteen, we should have a strategic vision. 13, "The girl I like should be as talented as Daiyu, as sensible as Baochai, as beautiful as Ke Qing, as generous as Xiangyun, as loyal as Li Wan, as capable as Tanchun, as smart as Xifeng, as blessed as Yuan Chun, hehe ..." "But I don't like being as fragile as Daiyu, as selfish as Baochai, and as fickle as Ke Qing. Cherish spring as disheartened, wonderful jade as affected, haha ... "14, if eating more fish can make people smart, then I should at least eat a pair of whales ...: 15, if you want to live with me, you must live with me first! I'm yellow after I survive. I'm so crazy! I'll be there when it's over. I'm so cool. I'll throw it away when I'm done. I'll put it off! 16, in the west, Zhuge Liang played a song with a lingering sound, and 150,000 Wei Jun outside the city was fascinated. Zhuge Liang: "Thank you. Please pay one or two tickets. " Wei Jun got a fright. In an instant,150,000 people didn't escape ... 17. I have the biggest dream: in the last round of Serie A in 20**, this is a game in which Inter Milan can win the championship and Juventus will be relegated if they lose ... At the last minute of the game, recoba received Vieri's pass and slipped three times in a position ten meters offside. The lovely President Moratti is our witness, and 80,000 Inter Milan fans at the San Siro lit candles together in the rainstorm to bless us ... 18, and the rivers and lakes were turbulent. Those who are good at making knives fight their way out are called swordsman; A man who is famous for his sword is called a swordsman; When I was in Shui Mu, people who liked to pour water with a ladle were called ... Hehe:) 19. When I saw her shy and lovely expression, I couldn't help feeling uneasy and asked, "Do you really like me?" She buried her head and didn't dare to look at me. She said, "Guess!" "Like" I blurted out. Her face is redder and her head is lower. "Guess again!" 20, it's raining, don't forget to bring an umbrella, it's too wet for gonorrhea ~ ~:)