Why don't older women with a monthly salary of 3,000 like second-married men with a monthly salary of 20,000?

I have been attending funerals in my hometown these days.

Late at night, I will write down what I saw and heard during the day. At the funeral, many of us got together to talk about the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, and men and women got married and divorced.

A niece in my hometown is several years older than me. She is 37 years old. However, I have never been married. She has become a headache for her parents, and she doesn't even want to spend more time with her relatives at the funeral, for fear that someone will ask about her daughter.

They came for a while and left at once. The more they do, the more people talk about it. My niece doesn't take part in any activities at home, and she feels tired.

It's not that she doesn't want to get married, but that she chose to be 37. At first, the object of introduction was also good, but she just didn't like it. This man is always like this. He always thinks he can find something better. As a result, when he found it, he found that he was actually not so good and had lost his age advantage.

Supposedly, she is 37 years old and has never been married. She should spend all her time making money.

But no, she has changed several companies, and her monthly salary has been between 2000 yuan and 3000 yuan. She doesn't have strong ambition and doesn't like working, so she wants to find a good man to marry. However, when I was young, I chose too hard. Now she is not so good in all aspects, and there are not many good men who can date her. She doesn't want to make do with it, so she can only drag it on year after year.

Last year, her family introduced her to a second-married man who was one year younger than her. The man's family conditions are very good, and he has a house and a car. The man's monthly salary is 20 thousand, and his in-laws are more reasonable. The only drawback is that when a man gets divorced, he has children.

As a niece, looking for a partner actually values conditions. She thinks that if she doesn't marry a rich man, others will laugh at her. She should be proud, even if I am old, I can still marry well.

She has a crush on the man's conditions, but she just doesn't want to accept the children left by his ex-wife. After dating for a period of time, the man had the intention to get married, but she suggested, "I don't want to be a stepmother, if only you didn't have children." If you get married, your ex-wife's children will have to compete with mine for property. I can't accept it. If you want to marry me and you can't take care of your ex-wife's children in the future, take him to your mother and don't let him in front of me. "

Originally, men had a good impression on her, and so did her husband's family.

Although old, although lazy, not self-motivated. However, it is a first marriage, and a man is a second marriage with children. It's good enough to find a first marriage. Therefore, even if the woman is not good enough, the man's family still thinks it's good to marry such a woman.

Unexpectedly, the woman put forward such a condition.

The first person to stand up is the man's mother: "Don't worry, I won't let you raise this child. You don't like him and I don't trust you." In the future, this child will be raised by his grandmother. "

The idea of a man and a mother is that you don't have to criticize my son because of his children. As long as you are willing to be together, this child will never be a burden to you.

After that, it is the silence of men. He hesitated for several days, and finally said this to the matchmaker: "If I had a house, a car and money, I wouldn't look for her without this child. It is because I know that having children is a drag on the other half that I lower my standards. I didn't expect her to take a fancy to my conditions and find fault with my children. I don't force her to accept my child, but she can make such a condition, which shows that the rest is not unreasonable.

During our relationship, she always thought that she would stop working when she got married and asked me to raise her and her children. I am a man. I should keep it. However, she just wants to get it herself and doesn't want to pay, which is unacceptable to me. "

In the end, this blind date ended without results.

And many people in the family also understand why she stayed. She is too emotional, but it's a pity that her conditions are not good. She always thinks that others can love her without paying attention to her poor conditions, but forgets that she has never loved others and has never been considerate of others.

In fact, most people who can get married in the end are evenly matched. You only saw Guo Jingjing marry into a rich family, but you didn't see how good Guo Jingjing's own conditions were. Marriage has never been a pie in the sky. You are looking at others, and others are looking at you. No one wants to help the poor, even if there is love. Because poverty alleviation, once it happens in marriage, means that the person who is helped by poverty does not love you enough.

I never think that older women should be despised, because some of them really left voluntarily. They have enough choices in their own lives and are willing to undertake their own choices.

But I really don't like this older woman: she wants to get married, but she just wants to be lazy about life through marriage, not according to her own conditions. In those years when she was unmarried, she didn't fight hard for her career, but just muddled along, thinking that it would be better to work hard if she got married.

How can such a girl be confused?

She can't see herself clearly.

People are expensive in knowing themselves. If you are not good enough, but you want to marry an excellent person, then you should cultivate yourself well and make yourself worthy of others' Excellence. I don't want to try to be excellent, but I think excellent people can help themselves. This is greed and ignorance.

She thinks marriage is a fairy tale.

She thinks she is Cinderella, so she should marry the prince like a fairy tale. In fact, in real life, even if Cinderella married the prince, she would not be happy. Marriage needs not only love, but also management.

She thinks that if a man loves her, he should accept her incompetence. I never think that marriage is an emotional cooperation after all. And she belongs to someone who has no ability to cooperate with others and doesn't know it.

People who want to change their destiny through marriage are, in the final analysis, just lazy and selfish.

People who want to change their destiny through marriage simply want to be lazy and take advantage of others. Actually, such people are lazy and selfish.

Her own life is a mess. She doesn't try to change, but wants to change the status quo through marriage.

She feels that others love her and should save her.

But I don't want to. Is she in love with someone else?

If you really love someone, you don't want to blindly drag him down and become his burden. But want to stand side by side with him, * * * with a promise.

For women, marriage and men can't save you, only their own efforts can save you.