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Speaking skills between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law
Speaking skills between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law
Speaking skills between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Conflicts easily arise between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. This is a problem that has been difficult to solve since ancient times. So how should mother-in-law and daughter-in-law get along with each other? In fact, smart daughters-in-law can use some speech skills to avoid conflicts. Shared below Talking skills between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Speaking skills between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law 1
Speaking skills between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law
Giving recognition
We all know that elders and young people have different values, so there will be many Resisting thoughts. The most common educational problems faced by mothers will always cause conflicts between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. When the opinions of your elders are different from yours, don’t rush to do it first, let alone bow your head and endure it. I suggest that you agree with the elders’ ideas first, and use words like “Mom, you are right”, “Really” That’s it” and so on.
The main thing is to agree with the proposal. Just unconditionally agreeing with the council is considered perfunctory, so you might as well try to put forward your opinions. For example: When asked by parents why they haven’t had children yet? Answers: “But... the economy doesn’t allow it”, “but... we currently have other plans and don’t have time”, etc. Instead of putting on a cool face and feeling uncomfortable when being questioned, starting the conversation with approval will get better feedback.
Propose solutions
Preparing for exams requires review, and going on stage to debate requires preparation. If you want to convince your elders and gain recognition, of course you must have a practical plan. The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is equal and not antagonistic. At this time, effective communication is very important. Abandon the preconceived concept of "the elders don't listen to me at all." Take choosing a kindergarten as an example. If you want your elders to agree with your choice, you must prepare a plan. Skill.
If there are three choices of ABC, first of all, all three choices are acceptable to you, so no matter which one is chosen, there will be no big loss, and the way of speaking is like talking to Chairman Xiang Just like making a presentation, remember to add more details to the options you want, and be a responsible salesman. This will greatly increase the chance of being chosen by the elders. By giving them options, you not only make them feel respected, but also It saves you the trouble of disagreements.
White Lies
It is very important to adjust your mentality when you are a daughter-in-law. Although they say that two families become one family after marriage, as any mother knows, the reality is not that simple, so you must keep in mind , "Mother-in-law is not mother." This sentence is not to express the alienation between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, but to be more caring than parents in dealing with it, and to pay more attention to words and deeds.
If you live with your parents-in-law, whether it is for work or for dinner with friends, you must report your itinerary to them so that the elders feel respected and there will be no questions about what the wife is busy with every day. I don’t even know the displeasure, and I also know how to tell some white lies, such as giving red envelopes during the New Year. Regardless of whether the money for the red envelopes is given out together or separately, as long as it is given to the parents-in-law, the husband must say that it is his wife’s intention. , and the woman keeps it for her parents, it can be said that it is her husband's wish. The husband and wife help each other, and it is easier to integrate into each other's family. Speaking skills between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law 2
Taboos between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law
1. Mother-in-law’s vanity
Everyone likes to hear some beautiful words. It will be very happy and comfortable. The elderly need to be coaxed just like children. They must learn to praise her more in daily life and tell her that her mother looks much younger than her actual age and that her home is really clean. , the food cooked by my mother is delicious, incomparable with the food outside. Just like this kind of beautiful words, you can say as many as you want.
2. Boss your husband
Since ancient times, China has had the idea that men are superior to women. If you always boss your husband around, your mother-in-law will definitely feel uncomfortable and feel that her son has been oppressed by you. , is not able to be the master of the house, and is actually being manipulated by you, she will have feelings of resistance in her heart. You can do whatever you want without being seen by her mother-in-law.
3. Being affectionate with your husband
Just like if you are always too affectionate with your husband in front of outsiders, it is also a kind of disrespect for others. It is even more taboo in front of your mother-in-law, who will If I feel that my son has been snatched away by another woman, I will feel jealous. I must avoid my mother-in-law. If I want to be intimate, close the door and let you go.
4. Complain to your husband
If your mother-in-law complains to your husband, see if what she says makes sense. If not, you should guide your husband to mediate. Don’t Confront your mother-in-law yourself, and your daughter-in-law should not complain to her husband over trivial matters. She should be more tolerant, so that the family will be harmonious and you will live a happy life.
What are the reasons for the discord between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law?
1. The wife is too lazy
From the mother-in-law's point of view, the son actually married a daughter-in-law just to share a certain amount of housework appropriately. Life, otherwise you think that with the so-called love, you can drink enough. Life after marriage is every bit of the family. Especially after having children, more and more details require a careful, serious and hard-working daughter-in-law. , First of all, not only are you helping your mother-in-law, but you are also one of them. There is nothing wrong with doing something to the best of your ability, right? What's more, the mother-in-law is also a daughter-in-law. They are all experienced. If their nature is not too bad, in fact, no mother-in-law really likes to abuse others for no reason, right? And precisely because they have experienced it, they know the difficulties of being a daughter-in-law, and they are even less likely to go out of their way to embarrass the daughter-in-law (except for those with psychological problems). In addition, don’t many people from the perspective of a daughter-in-law think that a daughter-in-law should be diligent and take care of the housework in order to gain the favor of her mother-in-law?
2. The daughter-in-law does not respect her mother-in-law
Why is it said that the daughter-in-law does not respect her mother-in-law? Although it is said that mothers-in-law have always been picky about their daughters-in-law, mothers-in-law are not "as black as crows in the world", and not all mothers-in-law are unreasonable. Besides, who can rule out the possibility of a daughter-in-law picking on her mother-in-law? Of course, what I’m talking about here mainly refers to daily communication. A daughter-in-law may not know how to speak. Young people are straight-tempered and don’t have the experience of a mother-in-law. Sometimes she may hurt her mother-in-law with a rude word.
In fact, the best way for a mother-in-law and daughter-in-law to get along is to get along like a mother and daughter. A woman is her mother’s little cotton jacket, so many friendly mothers-in-law will regard their daughter-in-law as half a daughter, hoping to teach her more Of course, it would be best if it is a "consensual relationship". If it is just the mother-in-law who is helping, conflicts may arise due to the daughter-in-law's lack of understanding.
3. Lack of communication
It is extremely important in any kind of relationship. Husband and wife need to communicate, parents and children need to communicate, and mother-in-law and daughter-in-law should actually communicate more. communicate. There are two reasons. First, there is a distance between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Their living habits, interpersonal interactions, life experiences, etc. are all different. Mother-in-law, as the elder, naturally hopes that her daughter-in-law can be close to them, because in their eyes, In fact, a daughter-in-law is like her own child. The second reason is that mothers-in-law also need to talk, and some things can only be told to women. If the mother-in-law does not have a daughter, she will usually choose to talk to her daughter-in-law to reduce her own psychological burden, especially as she gets older, my son said. If you ignore your mother because you are busy with work, your daughter-in-law can actually spend more time with your mother-in-law. If you treat your mother-in-law as your own mother, you will find that her mother-in-law is actually not so picky.
4. The daughter-in-law treats her mother-in-law as an outsider
The war between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has been going on for many centuries, and it is still a war without gunpowder. In the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, it is not only the mother-in-law who treats her daughter-in-law as an outsider, but also the daughter-in-law who treats her mother-in-law as an outsider. Otherwise, why would so many mothers-in-law be alone and wandering outside begging for food in their old age? When many people take action against their mother-in-law because they have wronged their daughter-in-law, in fact, the mother-in-law is also wronged. Because some daughters-in-law are very possessive and always feel that everything about their husbands belongs to them and has nothing to do with their mother-in-law. But daughters-in-law must know that your husband was brought up by your mother-in-law, so how can you say it has nothing to do with it. In fact, if your daughter-in-law could put herself in her shoes, how would you feel if your own son listened to your wife and ignored you many years later?
Three sentences will bring the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law to a freezing point
At the same time, you should consider some words when you say them. Many times you can hurt her inadvertently. If you want to improve the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, it is recommended that you do not say these three things to her:
1. "Mom, you don't understand..."
This is a young daughter-in-law handling housework. Or the most common saying when taking care of young children.
Maybe it doesn't matter in your eyes, but this kind of words hurt the old man's heart the most. Although she may indeed not understand, it does not mean that she is incompetent or knowledgeable, nor does it affect her right to have her own son and grandson. But your "you don't understand" completely excludes her from the whole incident. In the eyes of her mother-in-law, you are clearly telling her: "Don't get involved if you don't know anything." Want to improve this situation It is recommended that you change this sentence to "Mom, please tell me..."
2. "My baby..."
Many mothers who love their children often say I couldn't help but say "what about my baby" in front of my mother-in-law. However, once such words are heard by the mother-in-law, it may cause a war between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. The mother-in-law will mutter in her heart: "Why is my son my son? The baby is still the eldest grandson of my Lao Li family...". Therefore, although there is nothing wrong with this kind of name with a strong sense of belonging, it makes the mother-in-law feel a crisis. To avoid this kind of conflict between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, I suggest you change the words to "your grandson (your granddaughter)..."
3. "Your mother..."
For most For a daughter-in-law, it is almost impossible to treat her mother-in-law as her biological mother. For example, after you make a mistake, your mother-in-law will never say to you, "What a stupid kid" like your biological mother. Therefore, many daughters-in-law often turn "How is your mother" into a spoken language when chatting with their husbands. And your mother-in-law must be particularly unhappy when she hears you calling her this way. Therefore, as a daughter-in-law, it is best to call "Mom" several times in front of and behind others to enhance the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
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