Do you have any jokes to tell? Please, thank you.

1 Part of it was given to an American, a Japanese and a China to explore the jungle, but they were all caught by a cannibal tribe. The tribal leader said, "I'm in a good mood not to eat you today, but you all have to get a hundred boards, but you can realize a wish before you get a board." The first person who was hit by a board was an American. He said, "Before being hit by a board, put 10 cushions on my ass." The chief said, "Pad it." The board rained down, the front 70 boards were ok, the back 70 boards were smashed, and then the boards were bloody ... After the fight, the Americans left by touching their bottoms. The Japanese asked for 10 mattress after seeing it. 100 after the board was finished, the Japanese got up and patted their ass, so they boasted about their ability to imitate and recreate, and wanted to sit aside and watch the Chinese drama. China people squatted down slowly and said unhurriedly, "Come on, put the Japanese on the mat, face up!" There are an American, a German, a Japanese and a China on a plane. Halfway through, the plane suddenly ran out of gas. The captain announced that someone had to jump off the plane to reduce the weight, so the American showed personal heroism and went to the door of the plane and shouted: Long live America and other countries! ! Then I jumped! When the plane continued to fly, the captain announced: the weight is still too heavy, and one person has to jump! So the Germans stood up, walked to the door of the plane and shouted: Long live the German Empire! Jumped down, too The plane continued to fly, and the captain announced: No, it's still heavy, and one more person must jump! China glanced at the Japanese, stood up and walked to the hatch of the plane. The Japanese rushed to hold China's hand: Good brother, I won't forget you! The people of China shouted: Long live the people and country of China! ! Then I kicked the Japanese down with one foot! The third part is Japan, the United States and China. I was so thirsty when I went to the Indian tribe that I stole the sacrificial fruit. The chief found it, tied it up and said: You have redeemed God (forgot how to pronounce it), but God has the virtue of living well and gives you a chance. 10 samples of the same fruit were found. Then three people went to look for it. Americans came back first and found 10 bananas. The chief said, you should poke the banana peel open and stuff it into your anus. Don't cry or laugh, or I'll kill you. Americans are very helpless and can only do it. Very painful. Crying, the chief killed him. Then China people came back and found 10 grapes. Chief: You put grapes in your anus. Don't cry or laugh, or I'll kill you. When the Chinese saw that the Americans were killed, they were scared, so they did it. Then he stuffed nine grapes into it and smiled. The chief killed him, too. Later, when China ascended to heaven, God asked him, "Ten grapes are easy to plug. What are you laughing at? " . China people said: Because I saw the Japanese come back with 10 watermelon. Part Four A plane crashed on an island. Only one American, one China and one Japanese survived, but they met cannibals on the island. The patriarch told them that as long as the total length of DD of the three of you exceeds 20 cm, we won't eat you. The American was measured first, and his length was 12 cm, then the China, and his length was 7 cm. Americans and China. It's time to measure the Japanese. His length is exactly 2 cm, and the length of the three people adds up to more than 20 cm. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief ... after the cannibal left, the American said, "I am more than half of my length. Without me, you would have been finished." China people are unconvinced and say, Ya, my length is equal to the average. Without me, you would have finished. After a while, the Japanese broke out. If I didn't get an erection just now, you're all finished! ! Part V A China and a Japanese came to the temple of the God of Wealth and said, "Come on, I can satisfy each of you with a wish related to money". The Japanese scrambled to say, "I want a lot of money." So the Japanese have a lot of money, while the China people continue to say, "I want him to owe me money forever". So all the Japanese money was returned to China! They came to the old man again and said, "Come on, I can grant each of you a wish related to love." The Japanese said happily, "I want a beautiful woman. "(So a beautiful woman appeared in front of the Japanese) China said," Help me turn that beautiful woman into a man ". Part 6 During the Nanjing Massacre, a little Japanese went to the toilet one morning and looked down: he found that one of his eggs had turned green and was extremely scared. Want to know if you have done too many bad things? I heard that there is an old famous doctor in China who specializes in intractable diseases, so I went to see it. " Doctor, what do you think is wrong with me? "The old Chinese doctor looked at it carefully for a long time and said," In my years of medical experience, I have never seen such a strange disease. I think it's safe to cut it! "Japan thought: I still have a unicycle gun, so cut it. So the old Chinese doctor cut him an egg. A few days later, when Japan went to the toilet, she found that her other egg turned green, so she quickly went to the old Chinese doctor. " What is wrong with me? "The old Chinese doctor looked around." According to my years of medical experience, you may have deteriorated. Young man, life is important. Let's cut it off. "Small Japan thought that's it. So the old Chinese doctor cut him another egg. However, a few days later, the Japanese stick turned green. This will make Japan really desperate. Come to the old Chinese doctor. " Doctor, what do you think is wrong with me? "The old Chinese doctor pondered for a while and said," With my years of medical experience, your underwear has faded! ""Part VII After a shipwreck, three people were lucky enough to be washed up on an island by the sea, including an China, an American and a Japanese. When they woke up from the coma, they found themselves in a cannibal tribe. After seeing them, the chief said, you have two choices, one is to die, and the other is to play with your ball. China people think that it is better to play your ball than to die, so they have to. The chief sent someone to beat them 1 time. The Americans saw it and chose to play ball. Seeing that he was ugly, the chief ordered him to play 1000 times. It is Japan's turn, he said. We have the spirit of Bushido in Japan. We can't call you an insult. I choose to die! ! ! So the chief gave an order: play Japanese balls until they die! ! ! Americans, British, China and Japanese discuss their own military affairs together. The Japanese said, "We advocate Bushido and are not afraid of sacrifice. I dare to put an apple on my head and let you test your marksmanship. " So he put an apple on his head. The American turned and walked back 20 steps, then turned with a gun, and the apple was smashed. He proudly said, "I am a hunter". The Japanese put another apple on his head. The Englishman turned and walked back 50 steps, then walked back with a gun, and the apple was blown off. He proudly said, "I am Boone (Bond)." The Japanese put a small apple on his head. The China man turned and walked back three steps, then walked back with a gun, and his head was blown off. He said proudly, "I'm sorry." Part 9 A taxi is driving on the way to Chicago airport, and a Japanese tourist is riding on it. At this moment, a taxi passed by and the Japanese shouted, "Look, Toyota! Made in Japan! How fast! " After a while, another taxi passed by. "Look, Nissan! It's made in Japan! It's too early! " Another taxi passed by. "Ah! It's Mitsubishi made in Japan! Very fast! " Taxi drivers are 100% American. Seeing that so many Japanese cars have surpassed their American cars, coupled with the arrogant language of the Japanese, he was a little annoyed. When another taxi overtook it, the taxi pulled into the airport parking lot. "It's Honda! Made in Japan! Very fast! There is no medicine to save! " The taxi driver stopped and pointed angrily at the meter and said, "1500 dollars." "So close to 1500 dollars? ! ""forget it! Made in Japan! Very fast! There is no medicine to save! " A China man called a Japanese businessman and said, "I want to speak to Mr. Taro." The operator said, "I'm sorry, he died last week." The next day, the man called again and wanted to speak to Kazutaro. This time the operator was a little annoyed and said, "I always told you that he died last week." Why are you calling? " The man said, "Because I just like listening."