Joke Collection Website - Cold jokes - Inspiration from the classical Chinese of Anemarrhena and Fritillaria
Inspiration from the classical Chinese of Anemarrhena and Fritillaria
1. Vernacular translation of the classical Chinese text "No credit after death, rich people are born, Zhimu Fritillaria"
A man from Zhimu Fritillaria has just opened a drugstore, and he has not yet opened a pharmacy. There was still time to hire a store clerk who knew medicine.
One day, this man had to leave for something, so he asked his son Wang Jun to stay in the store. After a while, a customer hurried in and asked: "Man, do you have Achyranthes bidentata and Chicken Feet Coptis (Chinese medicine name)?" Wang Jun said hurriedly: "Can you come tomorrow?" "Come tomorrow?" No, the patient can't wait! Don't you have this kind of medicine in your store?" Wang Jun didn't want to admit that he didn't understand Chinese medicine. After thinking about it, he felt that the name of the medicine was quite familiar - Achyranthes bidentata and chicken feet and coptis. " Oh, by the way!" Wang Jun remembered that his father often said that some animal bones and fur can be used as medicine, so "Achyranthes bidentata and chicken feet and coptis" may be cow kneecaps and chicken claws.
So he said to the customer: "Please wait a moment, I will go to the backyard to get the medicine." Wang Jun came to the backyard and took out his cattle from the peng without saying a word. , he cut off one of the cow's legs, and then removed the cow's kneecap; Wang Jun also grabbed two chickens from the chicken coop, killed the chickens, and cut off their feet.
Then, he packed these two things into a package and returned to the front hall shop. The customer has been waiting in the shop for a long time and is already a little impatient.
Seeing Wang Jun coming, he asked: "Boy, have you found the medicine?" "I found it, I found it." Wang Jun handed over the cow kneecap and chicken feet. The customer had never seen this kind of medicine before. When he took the "Ox Knee and Chicken Feet Coptis Lian" handed over by Wang Jun, he felt a little strange. The medicine looked more like a meal with wine and food.
However, saving people is more important, and the customer cannot imagine that this "drug shop guy" knows nothing, so he just took the "medicine" and left. In the evening, the father came home and asked his son what medicines he had sold.
After listening to Wang Jun’s story about selling medicine, he burst into laughter. He sighed: "If a customer wants Anemarrhena or Fritillaria (Chinese medicine name), wouldn't you even have to carry your mother out?" A rich man was worried when a vegetable farmer failed to plant eggplants every year, so he Ask an old vegetable farmer for advice.
The old vegetable farmer said: "Bury one copper coin next to each eggplant seedling and you will survive.
The vegetable farmer asked why, and the old vegetable farmer replied: "Haven't you heard that those who have money live, and those who have no money die?" "After his death, there was a country man who was very stingy, but he became rich through his stinginess.
Later, he fell ill and was about to die. When he was about to die, he begged his wife: "I have worked hard to be greedy and stingy all my life. , cut off six relatives, now I am rich, after my death I can peel my skin and sell it to a cobbler, cut my meat and sell it to a butcher, and scrape my bones and sell it to a lacquer shop. "After getting his wife's promise, he died.
But he came back to life after a long time of death and told his wife: "Today's world is shallow, so you must not give it to them on credit. " . 2. Inspiration from classical Chinese
Hello!
Translation
Confucius visited the temple dedicated to Duke Huan of Lu and saw the Qianqi (a kind of water container). Confucius asked the temple guard: "What is this?" "The temple guard said: "This is placed on the right side of the seat to warn yourself, like a "motto". Confucius said: "I heard that this kind of vessel is tilted to one side when it is empty. When it is half full, it can be placed upright, and when it is full, it will tip over." So Confucius asked his accompanying disciples: "Pour water into this vessel!" "Braid scooped water and poured it into the teapot. Sure enough, when it was half full, it could be placed upright. But when it was full, it would fall over. When it was empty, it would tilt to one side. Confucius sighed and said: "How can someone be complacent but not overturn and fall? Woolen cloth? ! ”
Enlightenment
The ancients said that humility brings benefits, but humility brings harm. We should always remember that humility makes people progress, and pride makes people fall behind.
Supplement
3. Enlightenment from Hua Tuo’s classical Chinese essay on treating diseases
Enlightenment: To do anything, you must lay a solid foundation and rely on daily accumulation to achieve success.
Original text:
p>Tuo was walking on the road when he saw a man with a stuffed throat and an appetite for food. He wanted to go to see a doctor in his car. When Tuo heard about his illness, he stopped and looked forward and said, "There has always been a cake seller on the side of the road. Take 齑大酢②, take three liters and drink it, and the disease will go away. "It's just like Tuo's words. He spit out a snake ③ at the county ④ cart, and wanted to make Tuo. Before Tuo returned it, the child was playing in front of the door. When he saw it, he said to himself: "It seems that I met my father-in-law, and he was sick beside the cart. . "The sick man came forward and sat down, and saw about ten snakes in Tubei County.
There was a county guard who was sick. Tuo thought that the person was angry and was in trouble, so he accepted the goods without any treatment. He left a letter and scolded him. The governor was so angry that he ordered Tuo to be hunted and killed. The governor's son knew that he should not be chased away. He was so angry that he vomited black blood and recovered. /p>
(Selected from "Three Kingdoms")
Translation
Hua Tuo was walking on the road and saw a man suffering from a blocked throat. He wanted to eat but couldn't. The family took him to see a doctor in a car. Hearing the patient's scream, Hua Tuo stopped the car and immediately went to see him and told them: "There was a cake seller on the road where I came just now, which sold garlic paste and garlic. If you buy three liters of vinegar from the shopkeeper and eat it, your illness will naturally be cured. "They immediately did as Hua Tuo said. After the patient ate it, he immediately spit out a snake (referring to a parasite here), hung the worm on the side of the car, and wanted to go to Hua Tuo's house (thank you). Hua Tuo hadn't gone home yet. His two children were playing at the door. When they saw them, the children told each other: "It feels like they have met our father. The 'disease' hanging on the side of the car is proof. "The patient went into the room and sat down, and saw about a dozen specimens of this type of parasite hanging on the north wall of Hua Tuo's room.
Another county guard was sick, and Hua Tuo thought that this person He was so angry that he almost recovered, so he accepted his gifts many times without treating him, and soon left him and left a letter insulting him. As expected, the governor was furious and ordered people to hunt down and kill Hua Tuo's son. Knowing the situation, he told the envoy not to pursue him. The governor became even more furious and vomited a few liters of black blood and recovered. 4. The inspiration of the Yan people's return to the country
The "young boy" of the Yan people in this fable. "Le home boss, come back", but because he didn't understand his own country, he was deceived by others when he first arrived in Jin.
Seeing that he was homesick, his companions pointed to the cities, temples, houses, and tombs of the Jin State, and deceived the Yan people that this was his hometown. His strong homesickness prompted the old Yan people to "change their faces in shock." "Sighing", "weeping" and even "crying uncontrollably". When he really returned to his hometown, his "sadness was even less". This shows how strong and profound the initial impression and feelings have on people's emotional impact. People in a foreign land have unforgettable feelings about their hometown. This emotion or emotion is rooted deep in our souls, and it is difficult to recover once it is bruised.
Original text
Yan was born in Yan, grew up in Chu, and returned to his homeland when he was old. When passing through the state of Jin, those who traveled with him deceived him. Pointing to the city, he said: "This is the city of Yan State." The man was so surprised that his face changed. Pointing to the society, he said: "This is the society in Ruoli." Then he sighed. Pointing to the house, he said: "This is like the hut of our ancestors." He then burst into tears. Pointing to the ridge, he said: "This is like the grave of our ancestors." The man couldn't help crying. A fellow traveler laughed dumbly and said, "I am the one who belongs to the Jin Dynasty." He was very ashamed. When I arrived at Yan, I actually saw the city community of Yan State and the tombs of my ancestors, and my compassion became even weaker.
Translation Editor
There was a man from Yan State who was born in Yan State, grew up in Chu State, and returned to his own country when he was old. When passing through the state of Jin, his companions deceived him. He pointed to the city of Jin and said, "This is the city of Yan." The man's face became sad. A fellow traveler pointed to an earth temple and said, "This is the earth temple in your village." The man sighed. A fellow traveler pointed to a tomb and said, "This is the tomb of your ancestors." The man cried sadly uncontrollably. The person traveling with him laughed dumbly and said, "I just lied to you. This is the Kingdom of Jin." The man was very ashamed when he learned about it. When I arrived in the Yan Kingdom, I really saw the city towers and earth temples of the Yan Kingdom, and really saw the houses and tombs of my ancestors, and my sadness became lighter.
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