A selection of funny jokes about men doing housework

Nowadays, many people feel bored when doing housework, because they are doing the same thing over and over again. Do you know any funny jokes that can make people laugh? The following is a funny joke I arranged for you about men doing housework, I hope it will help you.

Funny joke about men doing housework 1, the most decent reason: life lies in sports, joints lie in activities, and doing more housework is good for health.

2. The most outrageous reason: I just like doing housework. What are you going to do with me?

3, the most entertaining reason: since doing housework and eating a delicious meal, my body is great, my waist no longer hurts, my eyes no longer spend, and my whole spirit is much more.

4, the most irrelevant reason: I heard that the guy who loves to do housework in my community won the first prize in the lottery, I want to do housework, I want to win the grand prize.

5. The most naive reason: insist on doing housework, and plan to declare the Guinness World Record for the longest housework time.

6, the most proud reason: others say that mopping the floor is more handsome than zero posture.

7, the most angry reason: my wife said that washing clothes is always not clean, and cutting vegetables is always cut. I can't believe this, I am a seven-foot man who can't do this housework well!

8. The most selfless reason: Do the housework yourself and let others enjoy it!

9. The most touching reason: My wife gets dizzy as soon as she cooks, and her hands blister when she mops the floor. I can't bear it.

9. The most romantic reason: I take pleasure in doing housework, and my wife takes pleasure in directing me to do housework. It's a perfect match to have such a couple in the world!

Funny jokes are listed in 1. Xiao Zhang is most afraid of being called fat. One day Xiao Li saw Xiao Zhang and said, You have lost weight. ? Xiao Zhang is very happy. After parting, Xiao Li said to himself: I said your sleeve?

2, mechanical design defense, Z students holding drawings were asked by the teacher in the dark. Finally, the tutor was anxious and said, classmate, if you say something you really know about this design, I will let you pass.

3. My graduation project is to study the toxicity of copper ions and zinc ions to Bufo bufo gargarizans. Then when I was defending, the teacher asked you what is the difference between this and the previous classmate. I replied: He is a tadpole and I am a toad.

4. A leader checks the exercises between classes, which should be announced by the PE teacher after the end, right? Dissolve? . But when the PE teacher was nervous, he forgot his words and held back for a long time, shouting: back off! ?

5, a buddy undergraduate replied, in order to highlight its research importance, my first sentence on stage: finite element method, is out of date. A row of faces are professors studying finite element. So this guy was tortured all day!

6. A classmate in our class is cruel when answering questions. The teacher asked how the buzzer sounded. He thought for a long time, didn't know why he blushed, and then summoned up the courage to answer: Ding!

7. The dormitory is on the 6th floor. When I climbed up, I found that I didn't have my key. I went downstairs and asked my aunt for it. Then I climbed up to open the door, went down to return the key and climbed up again. I found the door closed and a classmate next door passed by. Look at your door. I'll turn it off for you. ?

8. After running 800 meters, I want to show off in front of MM. I want to say: I am made of iron! ? The result said:? I'm a blacksmith! ? If you think it's wrong, correct it and say: I hit the iron! ?

9. The so-called festival without regret is not a festival. Today is the day of confession, so tell all your regrets. If you want to make amends, please choose reply 1, treat me to a big meal, 2, treat me to a movie, 3, send RMB directly!

10, on Valentine's Day night, my husband bathed my 3-year-old daughter. Just put her in the bathtub, the daughter shouted: Mom, look, is dad picking up girls? Go back to M to watch the lively Valentine's Day, pick up girls and date real people, and the last one will definitely make you laugh.

1 1. On Valentine's Day, a girl was dating her boyfriend in the park. Woman: It's so cold. I forgot to wear my coat. My boyfriend tightened his coat, shrank his neck into his collar and said, it's a good thing I wore it, otherwise I would freeze to death like you.

12, a yamen official's birthday. It is said that he is a mouse. His subordinate officials collected some gold and made him a mouse as a birthday present. The official saw it and said happily, Do you know? My big birthday is coming, and my wife is an ox. ?

13, my friend's face is a little long. Once I sat opposite him at dinner. I told him what I thought when I saw your face, and he said, Don't say such disgusting things when eating!

14, q: I only have 2 yuan in my pocket. What should I do for the next three meals? A: Buy a broken bowl and squat on the street. Q: Monthly salary 1200 yuan. What car should I buy? Answer: buy two sets of chess and four cars! And four BMWs.

15, one day, while the teacher was in class, suddenly a cat was barking outside, and the sound was endless. The teacher was very angry and said, I'm bored to death. What's your name? A classmate replied: Today is Valentine's Day?

16, I miss you so much that I can't stop thinking about you. Sister Furong, Xifeng and Yue are all thinking about you. If I stop blessing you, the Spring Festival will be over. I wish you a happy Year of the Rabbit!

17, a psychology professor said to the meeting host: If you want to calm the women attending the meeting immediately, ask them a question: Ladies, who is the oldest? The meeting room immediately became silent.

18, if it is my husband, just listen: I say a word, otherwise there will be no good fruit to eat; To be honest, I will pay in the class; Don't look at other women when shopping. If you dare to say nothing, you will be severely punished.

19. The reporter interviewed A Dai at the news scene. Reporter: What do you think about setting off fireworks and firecrackers casually in the city? A Dai: What else can I see? I'm just looking through the window?

20. joke: a very picky guest goes to a restaurant to eat. He asked the waiter: Are there any wild ducks? The waiter thought for a moment and answered:? There are no wild ducks, but I can catch a domestic duck, drive it crazy and cook it for you?

2 1, you have a mature face, a pair of narrowed eyes, a plaid shirt and an inherited property, bubbling like a full stop. More importantly, I heard that you still have a long life. Is it true?/You don't say.

22, two people chat. A: Boxing is really a great sport! I like this sport. I make a living by boxing, and I have a good income this year! B: So you are a famous boxer? No, I am a dentist.

23. Someone took part in a god of food competition, swallowed a chicken, nine hamburgers and a big piece of apple pie, and finally won the championship. Before stepping down, he said to others: Don't tell my wife, or she won't let me eat again.

Judge: You stole a car last month. It is efficient, isn't it? Car thief: Yes. It is a big mistake for you to arrest me now. If you give me a few more weeks, I can guarantee that the traffic jam problem in our city will be completely solved.

25. A little pig went to the company for an interview, and the boss asked. What can you do? He said:? There are only two things I can't do in the world! ? The boss said: so powerful! ? Which two won't? The pig said, this one won't, and that one won't! ?

26. Student: Are there any berths and hard seats in XX? Conductor: No more. Student: Do you have a standing ticket? Yes, but not for sale. Q: Why? A: The Ministry of Railways said that students are not allowed to go home standing this year!

27. One day, a lazy man went to the town by car to receive the national minimum living allowance. The car is very crowded. He went directly to take care of the special seat and asked others to give him his seat. The man refused. The lazy man said: the country takes care of me. Shouldn't I take this small seat?

28. happy event in the Year of the Rabbit: One day, the little white rabbit told the big white rabbit that he was hungry, so the big white rabbit gave the little white rabbit a pot of carrots and said: You are hungry, help! Go, cut this pot of carrots into diced meat! ?

29. On the night of Lantern Festival, a group of fireflies flew over the bustling city. Mosquito saw it and asked. Dude, what are you doing? A firefly should have arrived: everyone loves to watch lights. Although the wattage is a little low, at least it can shine!

30. When a recruit arrived at the mill, he asked an old man because the road was unfamiliar, and the old man pointed out the way. A few days later, the recruit went to the mill again, lost his way, and happened to meet the old man again, so he asked for directions again. The old man was startled: Little comrade, haven't you found it yet?

3 1, a man asked his friend: Why do you laugh when you smoke? Do cigarettes smell good? The friend replied:? No, I just read in the book that smoking a cigarette shortens life by 5 seconds, and smiling will prolong life 10 seconds, so I have to smile every time I smoke and earn back 5 seconds for my life. ?

32. A naked girl ran into a taxi and the driver looked at her all over. Girls scold:? what are you reading? Have you never seen a naked woman? ! ? The driver said:? I'm looking at where your money comes from! ?

33. Two women grabbed seats on the bus, and the one who didn't grab them said? It's pretty fast not to lay eggs often, right? The lady who grabbed the seat quickly got up? Excuse me, please sit down. Did I keep you from laying eggs?

34. reporter:? What contribution does football make to physical exercise? ? The coach replied. Reporter:? Why are 22 people who need to rest running hard on the field, while 40 thousand people who need to exercise are doing nothing? ?

35. There are many applicants in the bodyguard company, and the examiner asks them to perform unique skills. He performs boxing, karate and China Kung Fu. The last one didn't move. The examiner asked: What are you waiting for? I operate atomic bombs. ? The man said

36. When a person applies for a lumberjack, the speed of logging is amazing. The manager was surprised: where did you learn to cut trees? Have you ever heard of the Sahara forest? Manager: You mean the Sahara desert, right? A: Yes, that's the name now!

37. When the priest presided over the wedding ceremony for a newly married couple, because both the bride and groom had long hair, he couldn't tell who the bride and groom were, so he smiled and said to them. Please one of you kiss the bride! ?

38. Today, my girlfriend of three years dumped her boyfriend! When her boyfriend asked her if there were any other men, she replied yes. You're someone else? .

39. The bird said to the crow: It's amazing to wear braces, but it's still a bird. The crow said to the bird that people's teeth have been knocked out and are still being pulled out. Tooth-to-tooth crow: You are a bird that grows in the back. Don't be ashamed here. The crow said to his teeth, you eunuch, how dare you speak of me?

40. The defendant promised the lawyer that if I could only be imprisoned for half a year, I would give you an extra 1000 dollars. As a result, he finally got his wish. When the lawyer received the money, he said, this is really tricky. The judges had hoped to be acquitted.

4 1, a millionaire went back to his hometown and went to the best hotel, but nobody paid attention to him. He shouted to the waiter: Give me a dish of 1000 yuan! Excuse me, sir. We don't buy half the food! The waiter said.

42. A sick child shouted to drive with a letter card. Come and buy tickets! Patients kept coming to buy tickets, but one child didn't move. The dean asked you why you didn't buy a ticket. The children took out their mental health badges and said, well, I have a monthly pass!

43. The CIA issued an orange alert. 02 14: Millions of wives and husbands hire private detectives to investigate their spouses' behavior tomorrow and turn Valentine's Day into a day of arrest. Please raise your awareness and correct yourself to ensure a happy Valentine's Day!

Popular in April and April: I once told a girl that I wanted to become a monk before I met you, but when I met you, you changed my life! But the girl said she wanted to be a nun all her life when she met me!

Last night, I saw a UFO. It said it was to find my compatriots left behind and then robbed my mobile phone. I dialed and said happily that I finally found it! I looked puzzled and found that it was your mobile phone number!

46. Honey, marry me! W: Why did you tell me until now? Man: Because I'm afraid of death! W: Then why did you tell me? Man: According to statistics, married people should live longer!

47. The girl dated the boy, although it was very cold, she deliberately didn't wear a coat. The girl said: it's so cold, I forgot to wear my coat! The boy tightened his clothes and said, it's a good thing I wore them, otherwise I would freeze to death like you.

48. The wife complains that her husband doesn't understand a woman's heart and won't say what she likes to hear. Mr. Wang asked what she wanted to hear. The wife said, at least change the name. Don't address your wife in three words to show intimacy. I see, old woman.