Snow white funny version of the script

Narrator: Once upon a time, there was a beautiful castle in which an ugly queen lived.

Queen (to the magic mirror): Who is the most beautiful person in the world?

Mirror (yawning): Are you tired of asking this question all the time?

the queen (please): the magic mirror. Is there anyone more beautiful than me in the world?

magic mirror: no!

The queen laughed wildly ...

Narrator: Later, Snow White was born. Her skin is so fair, like a newborn pig.

Queen (to the magic mirror): Magic mirror, who is the most beautiful person in the world?

Mirror (warily): Don't say it!

queen (angrily): speak!

magic mirror (please): I said you would kill me. My ancestors died because of this.

Empress (resolutely): Don't worry, I won't hit you!

magic mirror (excitedly): Snow White, Snow White.

queen (grimly): what?

Mirror: Calm down.

queen: the queen is very angry, and the consequences are very serious! (waving his arm): I want to conjure up a soldier. Change, change, change ...

(The soldier ran out from behind the door)

Soldier: Report.

Queen (surprised): Ah! I didn't expect that I could become a living person!

magic mirror (lazily): I changed that.

Queen (more surprised): No way. (flipping through the book): There is no such function in the manual.

magic mirror: I'll tell you. Hide a person behind the door first, and then call him out.

queen (nodding): I see. (To the soldier): Soldier, I have a task for you. Today. Assassinate Snow White.

soldier (anxiously): not today. Today is the promotion of Gaizhonggai. Buy six and get one free. I have to go quickly!

Empress (suddenly enlighted): Yes, I have to go, too! Then you will assassinate Snow White tomorrow.

soldier: OK!

Act II

Narrator: When the soldier saw the beautiful Snow White, he was immediately fascinated.

soldier (smirking): hey, princess, I'll take you to the forest to see the little goldfish.

Bai Xue (smiling): OK.

narrator: The soldier led the princess into the forest.

Bai Xue (frankly): You came to kill me, right?

soldier (crying bitterly): What a beautiful and kind princess. Woo ... let's find a pig and kill it.

Bai Xue: That's not good.

soldier: that's right. oh, that's too insulting to piggy.

Narrator: In this way, the soldiers let the beautiful Snow White go.

Act III

Narrator: Snow White walked and finally collapsed under a big tree.

Bai Xue (wakes up): Why am I moving? It seems that something is dragging me away.

Dwarf 1: Really, we dragged you away, and you said something sarcastic.

Bai Xue (strangely): Who are you?

Dwarfs (in turn): firewood, rice, oil, salt, sauce, vinegar and tea! We are the seven brothers in the kitchen.

Narrator: The dwarf brought Snow White home, and from then on, the dwarf lived with Snow White. At the same time, the queen asked the magic mirror again.

queen (proudly): who is the most beautiful person in the world?

magic mirror: snow white, snow white.

queen (angrily): what's the matter?

magic mirror: step by step, always be the best!

queen: what is this?

magic mirror: advertising! Now it's a wonderful replay.

Empress (furious): Damn it! I want to do it myself!

Act IV

Narrator: The Queen set off with the soldiers, and they arrived at the kitchen's seven brothers' residence.

the queen knocks at the door: knock, knock, knock

Dwarf 2 (opens the door): Who is it?

queen: I ... am checking accounts.

Dwarf 2: Check the household registration? I have heard of it.

queen: how many people are there in your party?

Dwarfs 2: 7, and Snow White, 8.

queen: how do you make money?

Dwarf 2: We hunt for seven mornings, leaving Snow to cook at home.

queen: OK, the investigation is over.

narrator: The next morning, the dwarf had gone out, and the queen came again with her soldiers.

Queen (holding an apple): Hello!

Bai Xue: Hello, what do you do?

queen: I ... sell apples.

Bai Xue (strangely): There is nothing special about this apple.

Empress (politely): This apple can detoxify, nourish the face, clear away heat and prevent cough, and prevent stomach acid, stomachache and stomach swelling.

Bai Xue: Then what's its name?

Queen (stunned): It's ... It's called the Big Apple.

Bai Xue: What a vulgar name.

queen: would you like to have a taste?

Bai Xue (hesitantly): My mother told me not to eat strangers' food.

queen (smirking): soldier, go!

The soldier knocked out Snow White, and the Queen took the opportunity to put the apple in.

queen: done!

Narrator: In the evening, the dwarfs came back, and they saw the stunned snow.

Dwarf 3: Look! She seems to have choked on an apple.

Dwarf 1: No way, it's like being knocked unconscious and then choking to death.

Dwarf 3; Anyway, put her in the trash can first, let's all drink some melatonin, have a good sleep and bury her at the foot of the mountain tomorrow.

Dwarf (in chorus): OK!

Act IV

Narrator: The dwarfs dragged the snow down the mountain. On the way, they met the prince.

prince: what are you doing?

Dwarf 4: Drag her down the mountain.

why did you ask her to drag her down the hill?

Dwarf 4: Because she is dead.

prince: why did she die?

Dwarf 4: She choked on an apple.

Prince: Why did she choke on an apple?

Dwarf 4: Because she was knocked out.

prince "why was she knocked out?

Dwarf (impatiently): I don't know.

Prince (obsessively): How beautiful!

Dwarf 4 (referring to Snow White): You mean her?

prince (shaking his head): I mean clothes. What a nice dress, it's ruined.

Bai Xue (getting up): What did you say?

Prince Dwarf (exclaiming): You're not dead?

Bai Xue: I woke up when I heard someone speak ill of me.

narrator: From then on, Snow White and the Prince have been married for a hundred years. At the same time, the queen asked the magic mirror again.

queen (proudly): who is the most beautiful person in the world?

magic mirror: snow white, snow white.

queen (gnashing her teeth): how come?

magic mirror: there is justice in the world, and you must be kind. Or I won't do it, and I'll do it best. Better life.

queen: advertising again!

magic mirror: please watch the wonderful playback!

(after reading it) Queen (flying into a rage): Damn it. (smashing into the magic mirror): I smashed it. I smashed it ...

The screams of the magic mirror faded away ...