After betraying marriage, men choose to return to their families. Why is the purpose not so simple?

On marriage, I saw an author's profound understanding of Zhihu. He said:

Two people in marriage are like a pair of tourists walking in the desert. At the beginning, I felt the continuous fine sand under my feet, carrying a basin full of happiness and full of passion for realizing my dream. Slowly, after a long time, I walked away. The original passion has been obliterated by the cruelty of the desert and replaced by physical and mental exhaustion. When I looked up again, the end of the desert was still far away, and the way back was gone. I suddenly woke up.

Many women know second time around's truth, but they always think that a man returns to his family after betraying his marriage because he still loves himself and is attached to his family.

But in fact, only women who accept men again understand that some things can't be redeemed once they change.

As the saying goes, "betraying marriage is either zero or countless times", and men return to their families with various purposes, but not really to women.

-02-

If you don't believe it, it's better to let bygones be bygones for those who betray you, then you must look at the following examples, be prepared for danger in times of peace, and don't end up with both money and people.

Dear Yourself, Liu Yang, the purpose of returning to his family is to see people's hearts when he is sick and try to find the people who really love him.

In the TV series Dear Yourself, Zhang was betrayed by her husband Liu Yang.

For the sake of family and husband, Zhang has made countless hardships in his life and sacrificed several promotion opportunities just to keep a balance between work and family.

However, her husband Liu Yang did not understand her sadness. He is not only cruel and violent, but also exposed in language. He turned his head and fell in love with his intern.

Liu Yang even slapped Cecilia Cheung for this young woman with no future.

You know, when Zhang was bullied, Liu Yang never helped so much, so Zhang woke up, filed for divorce with Liu Yang, and started the life of a single mother.

Soon after, Liu Yang took the initiative to return to Cecilia Cheung, apologizing to Zhi Zhi and admitting his mistakes.

He said he was ill and his girlfriend left without saying goodbye. Finally, he realized that only Zhang was really good to him.

So he is willing to spend the rest of his life atoning for his sins, even if Zhang no longer forgives him, as long as Zhang no longer drives him away.

In fact, some men are purposeful creatures. He does everything with a purpose.

Betraying marriage is because a woman outside marriage can bring him freshness and repay his family, and also because a woman outside marriage can't give him what he wants.

Such a person, no matter how sincere his confession is, can't be sincere.

Nothing more than thirty Xu Huanshan, the purpose of returning to the family: his wife can help him achieve greater success in his career.

Thirty-year-old Xu Huanshan has a very happy family. His wife, Gu Jia, is smart and capable. She can take care of her family and achieve her career. They also have a lovely son.

It can be said that such a family configuration is the kind that many people envy. But Xu Huanshan needs to be worshipped because he loves romance, and he is with the employees of the cooperative company.

It is precisely because Xu Huanshan was distracted at home and didn't care about his company that the company's performance declined and he had to rely on his wife for help.

Although his heart was completely focused on other women at that time, he chose to return to his family and let his wife help him for the further development of the company.

Although Xu Huanshan has repeatedly promised that he has cut off contact with his lover and will live a good life with his wife and children, he still has not resisted the temptation of his lover to break up.

Such a man, even if his promise is beautiful, actually his purpose of returning to his family is not simple. He doesn't really want to live a down-to-earth life, but wants to reassure his wife and help him make money.

In fact, in real life, too many women will forgive a man easily because he has done well when he returns to his family.

But what is the ending? When the limelight is over, men are still at large, and women are still inferior to cattle and horses.

But how many women have Gu Jia's ability? Most women end up as "yellow-faced women" who are rejected by men, but they don't even have the courage to ask for a divorce.

Therefore, a man should not be forgiven for betraying his marriage for the first time.

"The next stop is happiness" Shen Fanfan, the purpose of returning to the family: I am afraid that my face will be ashamed because of divorce.

The next stop is happiness. The marriage between Zhang Xiaoyu and Shen Fanfan is really too realistic.

Shen Fan is always a person who hasn't grown up. When he was unmarried, he relied on his parents. After marriage, he depended on his wife for his life.

When his wife was pregnant and gave birth to a child, he disliked her figure and stopped dressing up. He smells like milk, and even belittles his wife to please other women.

Later, Shen Fanfan's behavior was discovered by his wife. In order not to let his wife divorce, he was worried that his betrayal of marriage would be known to his relatives and friends, and he kept begging for mercy, hoping that his wife would give him another chance.

Zhang Xiaoyu did the same, pretending nothing happened, but Shen Fanfan cheated his wife again and again, and finally Zhang Xiaoyu chose to divorce him.

This kind of man, his thoughts are not only eager for novelty, thus betraying marriage, but also some traditional thoughts. It is shameful to know that people who betray marriage.

So in order to maintain his marriage and not lose face, he will return to his family. This purpose is not simple. Once is easy, there will be many times.

-03-

I have read a set of data, saying that the probability of getting back together after breaking up is about 82%, but the probability of getting back together after breaking up is about 3%, and 97% of the reasons for breaking up again are exactly the same as the first time.

Some things are engraved in men's bones, such as unfaithfulness, selfishness and passion.

After learning the lesson from betraying marriage, most men will regret that they made the wrong choice, or they may regret it, but these are temporary. Once he gets out of the trough, he will make the same mistake again.

Old habits die hard. Don't think that men will really return to their families.

Just like in "The Next Stop is Happiness", Zhang Xiaoyu said when she divorced:

In this life, don't be a silly woman, and don't be a woman who plays dumb.

As a woman, you must understand that your kind choice of forgiveness is to make your marriage return to the calm before, but no matter how calm the sea is, there will be all kinds of disputes in the deep sea.

The same is true of men's hearts. He betrayed you for a reason this time, and he will betray you again for other reasons after returning to his family. You should remember a philosophical truth: one cannot step into the same pit twice.