Childlike jokes

1. The dung beetle family went to the countryside for a picnic. Dung beetle's mother asked:

"Honey, did you bring food?"

"What to eat, don't you see cows all around? Let's go there and wait. "

As a result, the dung beetles family drowned.

…… ……

…… ……

Because, that cow ate a bad stomach and had diarrhea.

2. Xiao Huamei: "Mom, I'm not feeling well today. Can I not go to school? "

Big plum: "What's the matter?"

Xiao Huamei: "I feel so sore all over, really."

A man was starving in the desert when he found the magic lamp.

Magic lamp: "I can only realize your one wish." Hurry up, I'm in a hurry. "

Man: "I want a wife ..."

The magic lamp immediately conjured up a beautiful woman, and then said disdainfully, "I'm starving and I'm greedy for beauty!" " Pathetic! "say that finish

It disappeared.

Man: "... cake."

The earthworm family was bored this day, so the little earthworm cut himself in two and went to play badminton. Mother earthworm thinks this is the way.

Not bad,

He cut himself into four pieces and played mahjong. Father earthworm thought about it and cut himself into minced meat.

Mother earthworm cried and said, "Why are you so stupid?" You will die if you cut so hard! "

Father earthworm said weakly ... I suddenly want to play football. "

5. The lens and the mirror mm fell in love, and the mirror mm said:

"I am so sad that I have been photographed by others all my life, but I don't know what I look like."

The camera said, "Never mind, why don't I just take a picture of you?"

When the photos are developed, ...

…… ……

Mirror MM: "5555 ~ ~ Why is it still you in the photo ..."

6. Mom A: "Your mouth stinks! What did you eat? "

Moth B: "I accidentally climbed into the pile of socks."

7. A hundred-dollar bill gave his son a big red envelope for his five-dollar wallet during the Spring Festival, and the five-dollar bill opened the red envelope with joy.

Found his mother inside.

8. After the earthworm father was injured, he was lying in the hospital, covered in bandages. Mother earthworm is responsible for feeding her father every day.

Mother earthworm has been worried that her father won't eat. The wet nurse suggested opening her mouth and pouring it in. Mother earthworm did.

Earthworm dad said after discharge:

"This hospital is terrible. It doesn't give food or enema every day! "

9. Panda men want panda women, and panda women fight hard and fight to the death. Panda man said angrily after the failure:

"We are all going extinct ~ ~ ~!"

10. Tofu mother came to the kindergarten to pick up the children and chat with the teacher. The teacher asked:

"Mrs. Tofu, do you like hot pot?"

"I like it very much!"

"That's great! Actually ... when playing hide-and-seek in the afternoon, your child hid in the refrigerator. "

1 1. Xiaomi: "Mom, I'm hungry!"

Mi's mother: "lovely, dad can't find a job and there is no food at home."

Xiaomi: "But I'm hungry ~ ~ ~"

Mother Mi: "Alas ... OK, you can borrow some pickles next door, and I'll boil bath water for your father."

Since: Club.ChinaRen.com

12. On this day, a lovely little girl came to Kannonji to burn incense for her mother. Put your hands together and you can't afford to kneel.

Suddenly I looked up and my eyes were full of crystal tears. Her pious prayers touched Guanyin Bodhisattva:

"What a filial child! Crane boy ... "

"Yes, Bodhisattva."

The next day, the little girl's mother began to grow a beard.

Because, the little girl said:

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......................

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"Mom wants a * *"

13. A patient went to his psychiatrist and said, "Doctor, think about my situation, my best friend."

Ran away with my wife. They have been gone for more than a month. I feel terrible because I miss my friends. "

14. The son said to his father: Dad, do you love me?

Dad said, sure, any questions?

The son said, can you divorce your mother and marry the aunt who sells candy next door?

15. Five yuan was kidnapped by a criminal gang. Dial a hundred-dollar bill:

"Ah! Your son is here. If you don't want us to kill the ticket, you can exchange yourself for him! "

One hundred dollar bills thought for a moment and said:

"Tear it, tear you up and you don't even have five dollars!"

16. The fat man made a girlfriend and broke up in less than a week. When a friend asked why, the fat man said:

"She said ... look at me for a long time, I feel so tired ..."

17. After the fat man was lovelorn, his mother was very anxious and took him to see a psychologist.

"Doctor, my son always has suicidal tendencies after being lovelorn. Please help him quickly. "

The doctor asked, "Do you want to commit suicide?"

The fat man said, "No ... I just feel hungry when I look in the mirror recently ..."

18. Pig: "Chicken, why don't you take a bath?" It stinks worse than me. "

Chicken: "Mom won't let me wash it."

Pig: "Why?"

Chicken: "Mom says I rub it back and forth when I take a shower."

19. Piglet and his mother go to a restaurant for dinner. Piglet wanted to eat "braised pork intestines" and was scolded by her mother.

"Are you sick? Eat your own water? -Waiter, let's eat steamed buns! "

"What kind of stuffing do you want?"

"Pork and green onions."