There are jokes about cats.

Mother mouse was striding along the kitchen floor with a group of little mice, when suddenly a cat jumped out.

The cat cried, "Meow! Mimeow！”

Mother mouse also called back: "Meiyu! Mimeow！”

The confused cat left, and the mother mouse said to her little mice, "Look, am I right?" I told you that it is always useful to learn one more foreign language. "

Two people are not as good as cats.

The husband was fed up with his wife's cat, so he grabbed it and went to the Woods to throw it away. But when he got home, the cat was lying quietly at the door, whispering to him with satisfaction. The husband was so angry that he stuffed the cat into a sack and went out. He walked 10 km, turned left and walked 15 km, then turned northeast and walked 20 km west, then let the cat out of the sack and left by himself.

An hour later, the husband called his wife: "Has the cat come home?"

"Yes, I will be back five minutes ago. Dear, why do you ask this? "

"You put this beast on the phone, I can't find my way home!"

Three children and a cat

The children sit at home and eat. The cat came up to him and called "Mimi". The child threw a piece of meat to the cat. It barked while eating, and the child threw it another piece, and it barked while eating.

The child was angry, stood up and said loudly, "You sit in my seat, let me scream, and you give me meat to eat!" " "

4 Cat surfing the Internet

User: Why can't I get online?

Customer service inquiry: It may be your cat's problem.

User: OK, wait a minute ... OK, my cat let me out!

Customer service:?

Five cats and mice on the computer

A jun doesn't know anything about computers, but he doesn't pretend to understand. One day, Jun A and Jun B got together to discuss computers.

B Jun: Why is the mouse connected?

A Jun: I'm afraid the mouse won't work. I want to run. I'm tied with a rope.

B Jun: Then why is there a wireless mouse?

A Jun: Didn't you see those people buy a wireless mouse and a "cat"?

B jun: why?

A Jun: Buy a "cat" online and catch a wireless mouse!

Jun: Oh. ...

A lazy man becomes a cat.

A lazy man died and reported to the king of hell.

Yan asked, "What do you want to do in your next life?"

The lazy man replied, "Don't make me a human again. People have to work, I am afraid of being tired. "

Rebecca: "OK, I'll make you a cat."

Lazy man: "I can be a cat, but I want to be a black cat."

"Why?"

"Become a black cat, I hide in the dark, the mouse can't see me, it passes in front of me, so I can eat it."

"Well, I decided to turn you into a black cat."

"Don't be busy, my black cat will be different: the whole body is usually black, but the nose is white."

"Why do you want to become a black cat with a white nose?"

"Let the mouse can't see me, only see the white nose. It bit my nose, so I can eat it by the way. "

7 punish hamsters

A family has a white Persian cat, which is very cute since childhood. ...

One day, the abnormal owner thought that TV was very good and should teach the cat to watch TV, so he held the cat in front of the TV. When the cat refused to accept it, the owner put the cat on the table and told it to watch TV.

Another day, the abnormal owner bought a hamster, hoping that the cat would catch the hamster and play with it. As a result, the cat was scared by the hamster, and the hamster was scared by the cat, so a cat and a mouse ran around the house. Gradually, the two animals became more and more familiar with each other and often played together. The cat licked the hamster's hair. The friendship between animals is touching.

Hamsters are getting bolder and bolder, and even go to the cat's food bowl to eat canned food. The hamster really went too far. The cat was very angry and made the hamster sick. The whole family thought that the hamster was finally going to be eaten.

But this cat just got angry, hated the hamster in front of the TV, and pressed the hamster hard with its two front feet to let the hamster watch TV.

8 xiaoyanger

A cat was walking by the river and was caught by a crab. The cat was very angry, but the crab ran into the bushes and hid. The cat can't find it anywhere. Suddenly, the cat looked up and saw a spider lying on the Internet. She went up and punched the ground: "You think I don't know you as soon as I get online, little boy!" " "

One family is particularly lazy. At work, father pushes mother, mother pushes son, and son pushes kitten. One day, the guest came to this house and rang the doorbell. The cat opened the door for him and continued to clean the table. The guest exclaimed, "Wow, cats can clean tables!" "

The cat said, "What is this?"

The guest exclaimed, "Cats can talk!"

The cat quickly said, "Shh, keep your voice down! Let them listen, and I should answer the phone! "

10 During World War II, three soldiers were put into a prisoner camp, one of them was a British soldier, one was a French soldier, and the other was a soldier who worked for Poland. One night, the guard fell asleep. The three men saw the opportunity now or never and were ready to escape. The British soldier was the first to go out and kicked the guard's foot. The guard asked, "Who?" The British soldier was anxious and gave a "meow". "Oh, it's a cat." So the guard went back to sleep. The French soldier then went out and accidentally kicked down the kettle. The guard asked, "Who?" "Meow!" "Oh, it's another cat. There are so many cats today. " The Polish soldier was the last one to go out, but he ran into the prison gate. "who?" "Of course it's a cat!" The Polish soldier replied.

Mrs Carter's kitten is running around outside, running from the roof to the cellar. The uneasy neighbor knocked on Mrs Carter's door. "Why does your cat run so crazy?" "Well," Mrs Carter explained, "I just had it operated on by the vet. Recently, I am busy canceling the original marriage everywhere. "

12 A lazy man died and reported to the king of hell.

Yan asked, "What do you want to do in your next life?"

The lazy man replied, "Don't make me a human again. People have to work, I am afraid of being tired. "

Rebecca: "OK, I'll make you a cat."

Lazy man: "I can be a cat, but I want to be a black cat."

"What's that?"

"Become a black cat, I hide in the dark, the mouse can't see me, it passes in front of me, you can eat it.

I hope I can help you ~