Interesting sentences will kill you.

1, I really want to control your grandfather's crying myself: Dad! In this harmonious society, primary school students celebrate Valentine's Day, middle school students celebrate Singles Day and college students celebrate Children's Day. 3. The wishing pool is a desire to eat. 4. At Christmas, every blue child who is not accompanied by an aluminum child can only tighten his collar at the corner of the cold wind and hear a sad reminder in the wind that really resounds through the city. Single boy! Single all the way! "5. Seeing the cat getting closer and closer, the little mice were very scared. At this moment, the mother mouse "woof, woof", the cat didn't know there was fraud, so she turned around and ran. When the cat ran away, the little mice ran out in fear and looked at their mother. When all the little mice arrived, the mother mouse said seriously, "children, do you know the importance of learning a foreign language now?" 6. I met an awesome person on the subway. On the subway, a buddy's doorbell rang so loudly that all the passengers heard it: "Grandpa, that grandson called you again … Grandpa, that grandson called you again … Grandpa, that grandson called you again." I saw that the buddy slowly took out his mobile phone and answered it, saying, "Hey! Dad, what's the matter? " 7. I couldn't catch the sand, so I lifted it. On the first day of school, the teacher asked everyone to introduce themselves. I spoke first, briefly summed up my personality and growth process, and looked forward to the future. The teacher was obviously satisfied with my answer and said excitedly, "Would you please leave the classroom?" 9. It's never too late to mend. It is never too late to mend. ) 10, even if my heart is the liver and lungs of the donkey, it is enough to feed the stomach of the dog. 1 1. It's a long way, so let's take a taxi. 12, the company has a very tough female colleague who is generous, plump and beautiful. Talking about losing weight in the office, I interjected: don't lose weight, it's fine now. Which is better? It feels good! You haven't touched me yet. How did you know? Everyone laughed. I'm a little embarrassed: I haven't touched you yet! I am different from others. Feel it! A public outcry. I stammered: sometime in the future ... when do I plan to implement it. 13, Tencent's "input" has given many people hope and disappointment. 14, a girl complained in the forum: No, I fell asleep on the bus and woke up to find a piece of chewing gum in my mouth ... First floor reply: I took the bus and found a MM next to me drooling, so I was sorry to disturb her, so I had to block her saliva with chewing gum, but I didn't expect her to chew it too. 15, when you speak ill of me, can you stop embellishing it and think it's cooking? 16, what are you pretending to be tender? Wrinkles on the face can kill flies. 17, where you fall, where you get up. Always falling that way, I suspect there is a pit! 18, "Honey, what do you think has changed about me?" "no" "really not? Take a closer look. " I stand up. Stand up. "Oh, my chest is getting bigger." "Yes!" The wife smiled smugly. "I can definitely say that it is adulterated!" 19 at the hotel. A man's girlfriend shouted angrily at him, you are the meanest person in the world! Hearing this, everyone in the shop looked at them in surprise, especially the man. At this critical moment, the man loudly said to his girlfriend: You scold him too well! What else did you scold him? 20. I can put your words in the oil pan and squeeze out the oil! 2 1, growing old together is not just about dyeing a hair and knocking out a few teeth. How long a mouse can live depends on the cat's mood. 23, her, don't nag, don't break the bowl, don't talk about QQ, don't go out of the wall. She bought a new house in a nice car and raised her husband as a baby. It's smarter than Zhuge Liang to close the moon and be ashamed of flowers. She is Lin Daiyu by day and Pan Jinlian by night. She loves her children and her husband. She can go to the hall and the kitchen according to her in-laws. I only make money for my husband every day, and my husband is sad if he doesn't spend money. She is one of the top ten people who moved China. Her name is-someone else's wife. The only proof that we have been together for so long is that you don't love me. 25. Those who are not afraid of debt collection are heroes, but those who are afraid of debt are really poor. 26. I went to the city to take part in the pigeon racing yesterday, but I went alone. 27. What is crazier than falling in love is lovelorn. 28. Cinema advertisement: The beautiful woman was dragged into the forest by seven men after fainting … It's worth seeing, buy a ticket! At the screening, your uncle: Snow White! The next day's advertisement: a woman and seven men have a stormy affair, not Snow White! Charming, not Snow White, buy a ticket! At the screening, grandma's: Eight Immortals Crossing the Sea! The next day, the advertisement changed again: the husband was killed, and the beautiful wife fell into the hands of seven boys ... If you are tempted, buy a ticket again! At the screening, my mother: gourd baby! 29, commitment, like fart, earth-shattering, and then pale and powerless. 30. Confucius said that in a threesome, there must be my wife. Choose a beautiful one to marry. 3 1, the most beautiful thing is not the rainy day, but the roof you use to shelter from the rain. 32. Go to the ATM to deposit money at noon. When I was waiting in line, the beautiful woman in the back asked me, "Save money?" "Well," "I just want to withdraw money. Anyway, if you want to save it, you might as well give it to me so that they don't have to wait in line. " As soon as I thought it made sense, I gave it to her ... 33. Cats and pigs are good friends. One day, the cat fell into the hole and the pig brought the rope. The cat told the pig to throw down the rope, so it threw down the whole bundle. The cat was very depressed and said, "How can I pull it up if I throw it like this?" The pig said, "What should I do?" The cat said, "You have to hold the rope!" " As a result, the pig jumped down and said with another rope, "Now!" "The cat cried. 34. I am not afraid to drink dichlorvos, but I am afraid to open the lid and enjoy one more bottle. Parents: Please don't call your children "Bunny", because from a genetic point of view, this is very bad for you. 36. I have thought about the five words "special efforts", and I have only achieved the first four. 37, I am hungry, you have a loaf of bread, you give me half, this is a friend; You gave me everything, this is love; You hide the bread and tell me you are hungry, too. This is society. 38. The tourists saw a street sign that said, "The road is closed." Seeing that there are no obstacles ahead, he is confident that he has rich travel experience and moves on. Soon, he found that a bridge was broken and had to turn around. When he came to the place where the road sign had just been placed, he saw the back of the road sign saying, "Welcome back, fool." 39. If I can remember you in my next life, it must be that I have not completely died in my life. Interesting sentences can make people laugh. 2 1. You take your overpass and I'll take my underground passage. On the bus, I heard a boy say to a girl next to him, "Who says you can't predict the future? At least I can know my child's surname in the future, but you are different. I don't know what your child's surname is! " Without thinking, the girl replied loudly, "Well, that's right! However, my child must be my child, and your child may not be! " 3, the teacher said: the college entrance examination is coming, don't quarrel with people who are puppy love, so as not to affect their mood; Don't confess without puppy love, lest you be rejected and affect your mood. The prisoner is being sent to the execution ground. The prisoner complained, "How fucking far away!" The policeman comforted: "Dude, you are very lucky. We have to come back again! " "5. Two rich men, A and B, were walking in the park when they suddenly found a lump of shit on the road. A said to B: You eat shit, I'll give you 50 million. Deal. Then I found another lump, and B said to A, If you dare to eat, I will give you 50 million yuan. A loves that 50 million, and now she eats clean. Party A and Party B hugged each other and wept: they didn't earn a penny, but one person ate a lump of shit. 6. The difference between a lie and an oath is that the listener takes it seriously and the speaker takes it seriously. 7. A village held a meeting to discuss funeral reform and save land resources, and the villagers expressed their opinions. A said: I suggest! No coffin, save money and land. B said: I think vertical burial can save more space. C knocked on his pipe and said slowly, I think it's only half buried vertically, even the tombstone is saved. You can tell who is dead at a glance! 8. cats and pigs are good friends. One day, the cat fell into the hole and the pig brought the rope. The cat told the pig to throw down the rope, so it threw down the whole bundle. The cat was very depressed and said, "How can I pull it up if I throw it like this?" The pig said, "What should I do? The cat said, "You should catch a rope! "As a result, the pig jumped down with another rope and said," Now! " "Cried the cat. 9. If you make a mistake, forget it. It will pass anyway. 10, African black girls travel to Shanghai and stay in hotels. Fire in the middle of the night. The African woman ran out quickly. A fireman was surprised to see it and said, my mother, it's almost burnt, and she's running so fast! 1 1, how far is it forever? Get out, boy! 12, someone asked the doctor, "Excuse me, doctor, how can I live to be 100?" Doctor: "First, give up drinking." Someone said, "I never drink. Doctor: "Second, abstain from color." Someone said, "I don't like women at all." Doctor: "Third, eat less meat." Someone said, "I am a vegetarian! ""Doctor: "Then why did you live so long?" 13, like you, at this age, it has fallen below the issue price. 14, the traffic police stopped a cow and asked for a driver's license. The driver was undocumented, so he looked up and down at the traffic police: Why don't you call a wife to mind my own business? Traffic police: My child is in middle school. Driver: Then take out your marriage certificate. Traffic police: I didn't bring it. Driver: No or not married. Traffic police: You can't say that. Just because you don't have a license doesn't mean you're not married Driver: I don't have my driver's license either ...15. I was given a black mouse in the dark, but I played with it until dawn. 16, the government is thinking about how to collect taxes reasonably, the boss is thinking about how to avoid taxes reasonably, and I am thinking about how to sleep reasonably! 17, love is like a ghost, many people believe it, but few people see it. 18, male, with a big waist, is also a burly man. One day in class, my pen ran out of water. I asked a girl not far away to borrow it. I only heard the girl shout, "Silly B?" The man suddenly felt wronged. Shit, I was scolded by a woman for this little thing? His anger was mixed with grievances and he shouted, "I just want to borrow a pen. Why did you scold me? " The girl said weakly, "I, I didn't scold you ... I asked you what pen you used (SB)." 19, whenever the charge sounded, I quickly hid in the ditch, because: I am undercover! 20. Traveling means going from one's own tired place to another's tired place. 2 1, the other half didn't get 100, only two people got 50 points! 22, I want to puppy love, but it's already late ... 23, no one is holding hands, so I'll hold it. 24. Before dying, the old man confessed to his wife: I once had an extramarital affair, please forgive me! Wife: What a big deal! You can close your eyes! Which of our children looks like you? 25. Xiu Yuan Road is far away, so let's take a taxi. 26, face first, unable to return to heaven. 27. Mixed society is a physical activity, and it pays attention to four lessons: flash and movement. 28.look at you! Looking at the back, I was anxious and turned my head to scare away millions of lions. 29. Real good friends are not together with endless topics, but together, even if they don't talk, they won't feel embarrassed. Interesting sentences can make people laugh. Don't talk with your lungs, it's all nonsense. 2, eldest brother, do you know? Second brother's meat is now more expensive than master's. Lucky people are those who spend two dollars to buy a lottery ticket, win five million dollars, and then bow their heads and pick up two dollars on the way to receive the prize. I can stand up straight only if you don't want a gift first. 5. The meaning of Friday is to plan how to spend the weekend; The significance of the existence of the weekend is to prove that Friday's planning is meaningless by staying up late and getting up late. 6. The tragedy of life is that when you want to do anything, you only have a knife. 7. If you are wrong, you must admit it. If you are defeated, you must stand at attention. Grandpa was handed down from his grandson. People must learn patience. 8. Someone asked me why my skin is black. I smiled. One white covers all the ugliness, and you cover all the ugliness. I am not ugly. 9. The mobile phone didn't ring for a month. I took it to be repaired today. As a result, the maintenance master said that the mobile phone was not broken, but no one called in for more than a month. I knelt down to the master and begged him to stop. 10, your timbre is not complete for life, but my hoarse voice is temporary. 1 1, fart, suppress bad heart. Don't push, exercise. 12. As soon as I entered the examination room, I collapsed. I cried when I saw the paper. I didn't take the exam and didn't do it. 13, I finally got used to my appearance, got a haircut and changed my ugly method. 14, learning bullying during the exam is like Wifi, and everyone who wants a password is within the range of Fiona Fang 10 meter. 15 actually, I have a very handsome angle, but you didn't find it. 16, quarreling with your girlfriend is like reading the license agreement before you install the software. It doesn't matter whether you understand it or not, as long as you finally choose "agree", you can move on to the next step. 17, women like two flowers best in their life: one is to spend money, and the other is to spend as many as possible! 18, even if I scold you, you don't know how to change it. You won't know if I'm both civil and military until I hit you. 19. Life never makes me comfortable. It always slaps me every once in a while to remind me that if I make another mistake, I'm dead. 20. Now, what qualifications does a man have to tell his sister to grow old together? I'm completely bald before I grow white hair. 2 1, don't study hard all day, don't take a shower for a month, don't go out for a year, and review for life! 22, three points busy, seven points busy, and finally filled life with ten points. 23. How lovely the world would be if my test scores could go up like house prices. 24. It is said that when a girl is angry, she will hold her down and kiss her hard, but why did I get hit by her boyfriend? 25, mermaid, I love you, only you will not cheat! 26. Don't talk about meeting the ideal of the right person at the best age. I just want to get something for nothing at the best age, and I can surf and lie around at any time. 27. Don't get angry easily when something happens, or you will be said to have a low emotional intelligence, smile and meditate. 28. The biggest sign of maturity is to disdain to argue with others and try not to make any noise as much as possible. 29, study hard, study hard, otherwise there is nothing to brag about in the future. There are two kinds of people in the world who are the most charming: one is like me, and the other is like me.