Short sentences of classic humorous sentences

Short sentences of classic humorous sentences

Classic humorous sentences and short sentences, there will inevitably be boring times in life, and sometimes you will feel irritable and sad. In order to add some fun to ordinary life, I will share some classic humorous sentences and short sentences with you. I hope everyone is happy every day!

The short sentence of the classic humorous sentence 1 1, live well or die fast.

When God closes a door for you, he always leaves many unlocked phone numbers on the wall for you.

3, chess, calligraphy and painting can't be done, and washing and cooking are too tired.

They said that the internet was fake, and I laughed as if the reality was true.

I took your promise to feed the dog last night and found the dog dead the next morning.

6. It's not difficult to be single, but it's difficult to deal with people who try their best to get you to end it.

7. When I have money in the future, I will send people I hate to the best mental hospital.

8. Being beautiful is annoying. If I were a boy, I would marry myself.

9. How people die is boredom.

10, I am convinced that someone will come to this world because of my torture.

1 1, I'd rather you hold another woman and miss me than you hold me and miss another woman.

12, I have the ability to pick up girls, but unfortunately I am a girl.

13, in the dead of night, I often ask myself, was it right or wrong to decide to come to earth?

14, I finally know why I wear a mask, not because of germs, but because I am afraid of people with bad breath.

15, I am also a spoony seed, but it rained ... and I drowned.

16, by the end of the year, I found that I only earned my age.

17, love is putting all your heart into it and then pulling it out!

18, three elements of success: 1, persistence; 2, shameless; 3. Insist on being shameless. Did you do it?

19, it doesn't matter if your head is empty. The key is not to get into the water.

Don't always be hot and cold to me, in that case I'm afraid of catching a cold.

2 1, the relationship between a man and his wife is worse, and the relationship with his mother-in-law is also good; No matter how good the relationship between a woman and her husband is, the relationship with her mother-in-law is also poor.

22. I received a short message yesterday asking me to remit money to an account of China Agricultural Bank. I replied: Don't worry, I'll burn it for you right away!

23. I smoke because it hurts my lungs and I'm not sad.

24, busy is a kind of happiness, so that we have no time to experience pain; Running around is a kind of happiness, which makes us truly feel life; Fatigue is a kind of enjoyment, which leaves us no time to be empty.

25. There is a kind of person who only does two things: you succeed, he is jealous of you, you fail, and he laughs at you.

26. I think you are really not a qualified friend. You'd better switch to be my wife!

27. In late autumn, I met you in the street, looking at your lonely back and helpless eyes ... I couldn't restrain my inner excitement any longer, and rushed over to grab your hand and said, friend, you stepped on shit.

28. If he doesn't help you put on the wedding dress, you can give him a cassock.

29. I said to the mirror, mirror, mirror, am I the most beautiful in the world? The mirror is broken.

30. When I am in a bad mood, I will make harassing calls to others in the middle of the night to wake them up and I will sleep.

How to transfer the money in your head to a bank card, online, etc. , urgent!

Second, the Chinese New Year is coming, and everyone basks in their own objects, in case there is the same paragraph.

It doesn't matter if no one gives you a gift. You can come to me. As long as you ask, I will say no. ..

Fourth, I thought I was also the seed of infatuation, but it rained and drowned.

I have learned many skills and found that the most useful skill is "modesty".

Please don't call me an otaku, but tell me to close the house. Please don't call me a house girl, call me Madame Curie.

Seven, all my good friends around me have taken off their bills, and I am even worse. I have lost my hair!

8. I finally realized in tears that some people can't lose weight once they get fat.

Nine, the child is going to be born, and the husband said, "If we have a son named Fengfeng, it means we have reached the peak of our life." Wife: "Fengtou, you don't know your surname is Yang."

Remember, dear, the good-looking ones are called coquetry, and the ugly ones are called running wild.

Don't wait, your Mr. Right is not coming. He is a garbage, eating chicken online all day.

I used to have a dog and named it "Stop". Every time: stop here, stop here. Before long, the dog went crazy.

Thirteen, there is only one worry when you are not full, and there are countless troubles when you are full.

14. I'm only in my twenties. Love can be late, but delivery can't be late at all.

The strangest thing in the world is that my mother took my father's salary card, but she taught me to be smart and not to give it to my future wife.

Sixteen, if people are unlucky, no matter where they sit when eating hot pot, smoke will float to their faces.

Seventeen, "How do you prove that you are rich?" "I finished watching Pleasant Goat and Big Big Wolf."

At the age of eighteen, I finally know why my feet are always cold, because my legs are long and my blood supply is insufficient, commonly known as high cold.

Nineteen, South Korean cosmetic surgery, Thai shemale, in fact, are more powerful than China's Mito Xiu Xiu.

I understand everything, but I can't help looking back when I hear someone shouting beauty.

Being single doesn't mean you don't understand love. The fact is that you are either fat or ugly, or both.

Twenty-two, the cultivation of sunshine girls: self-portrait 3 thousand.

23. Today, my husband said to his son: Relax and do well in the exam later. It doesn't matter if you don't do well in the exam. Your mother and I are still young, and you can still live if you are killed.

Twenty-four, the unit dinner, the leader praised me in front of everyone, saying that thanks to my frequent lateness, I had the funds for this activity.

Twenty-five, now girls, weigh themselves, can't wait to pluck their eyebrows.

Teacher: Please use "since childhood" to make sentences. Xiao Ming: You can tell whether it is a boy or a girl from the posture of defecation. Teacher: Get out!

Today, I told my daughter that dogs can distinguish 500 different smells with their noses. Then she thought thoughtfully for a while and turned to ask me: Then why does it eat/pull?

If there is an afterlife, I want to make a quilt, either lying in bed or basking in the sun!

Twenty-nine Generally, when people ask me if I'm busy, I always say I'm busy. According to my experience, if you say you are not busy, the other party will make you busy nine times out of ten.

Thirty, it's not easy to be a man:/kloc-get grades before the age of 0/8,/kloc-get married, have children, get grades after having children,/kloc-get children after the age of 0/8, all of them are laymen. Why bother each other?