Write a few jokes that don't make you laugh.

First, once, I joined the wrong group, and several rich second generations were talking about cars there. Porsche, Ferrari, Lamborghini and Maserati! I just joined the group and don't know the inside story: I have all these cars! Suddenly, the group exploded, and everyone asked me what car was better and it was more refreshing to drive. I answered with a puzzled look: they are all in my qq parking lot. Just finished, I was kicked.

The second is to meet such a person for the first time. I didn't say hello to my uncle and aunt when I entered the door. My father was on a business trip, and then I was silent and embarrassed. I asked you when you would go back to work, and others answered in three words for a few days.

3. Go back to your hometown with your parents. The house in my hometown is on the mountain, so I need to go down to buy something. I told my dad to accompany me to the mountain to buy some snacks, and my dad asked me to drive by myself. I said: no, if I get lost on this mountain road, you will have no girl. At this time, my mother said beside me, honey, stay with her and don't let her lose her car.

4. When the pilot recruits were training, no one dared to skydive, and the coach looked pale. At this time, I only saw one laughing, and the coach kicked him down with one foot. Then, one by one, like jiaozi, jumped down. The coach was puzzled, grabbed the last one and asked: I told you not to jump just now, how did you kick one out? You all jumped! The recruit replied: Coach, you jump too. You kicked out the driver!

The woman knows that the man likes her for a long time. One day, the woman asked: You like me for so long, why don't you chase me? M: I don't think that's possible. Woman: How do you know it's impossible if you don't chase it? The man thinks there is a chance and pursues her every day. After a while, the man confessed to her, but he was rejected. He asked her angrily why. She said coldly: I just tell you what is impossible with practical actions.

Six, tidy up the room in the morning, accidentally hit my thumb by a wooden box that fell off the table, which was a pain. I cried at that time and was still bleeding. At this time, my son who was playing in the living room came in and asked me where it hurt. I said my feet hurt and I was bleeding. My son looked at me contemptuously and said calmly, "Mom, this is nail polish." Say that finish severely stepped on two feet and ran away. ......

One day, a leader of the Education Bureau went to a school to inspect the school environment. After the inspection, the leader said, "Generally speaking, it's not bad, but it would be better to add some greening around the playground." The next day, the headmaster poured several cars of salt around the playground.

8. The young man asked the master, "I helped an old man yesterday and was wronged by 2000 yuan. I lost 1500 while driving this morning. What's wrong with the world? " The master took a cup for the young man to hold in his hand, and then began to pour boiling water. When the water overflowed, the cup fell to the ground and broke into pieces. The young man suddenly realized, "Does the master mean that you will understand only after suffering?" The master shook his head and said, "No, this cup belongs to the Qianlong period. Just pay 30 thousand yuan. "

Interviewer: Why do you want to apply for a job in our company? Me: My passion is the construction industry, and I was influenced by my father since I was a child. Interviewer: Oh? Is it? Let's talk about what relevant construction work we have done! Me: I learned to nail the bench under the guidance of my father since I was a child.

Ten, the goddess let me pretend to be her boyfriend to deal with my parents, talk about a reward for 300 yuan. As a result, she said at night ... I went to her house to see a mansion and several luxury cars, and her parents were very satisfied with me. That night, the goddess said shyly, "Otherwise, you can really be my boyfriend." I slapped her in the face: "Are you trying to cheat? Aren't you going to give me that 300 yuan?"