Divorce jokes of civil affairs bureau couples.

Yesterday, I brushed Baidu and saw a question: "You and your wife walked to the door of the Civil Affairs Bureau, but in the end they didn't get divorced?" I was curious about the answer, so I clicked in and read it. Most netizens left a message saying that they and their partners went to the civil affairs bureau for divorce, but in the end they had no experience of divorce. I found the messages of several netizens quite interesting.

Message 1: I found that couples who divorced from the Civil Affairs Bureau often didn't get divorced in the end if they were crying and quarreling, while those who were calm or talking and laughing finally got divorced.

Message 2: My husband and I went to the Civil Affairs Bureau for divorce three times, each time on Sunday, and the Civil Affairs Bureau didn't go to work.

News 3: To get a marriage certificate, my husband suddenly asked the civil affairs personnel, where is the divorce processing window? In case you need it later.

Message 4: On the way to divorce, one of them sneaked away for various reasons, and the result was unsuccessful.

Message 5: the civil administrator said that we didn't have all the materials, so we will go again the next day and then we won't go.

Message 6: On the way to the Civil Affairs Bureau for divorce, I began to think about each other's good mood all the way.

After reading all the messages, I feel that many couples may not really want a divorce, but when they quarrel, both of them are very angry and impulsively say that they want a divorce, but they really come to the door of the Civil Affairs Bureau and are reluctant to part.

In addition, after reading these messages, I have a doubt: "Why do people sometimes have to wait until they are about to lose, or have lost, before they know how to cherish and start thinking about each other's goodness?"

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2. Satisfied people are easy to see and touch.

Maslow's hierarchy of needs theory holds that people have five different levels of needs: 1, physiological needs; 2. Safety requirements; 3. Love and sense of belonging; 4. Respect for needs; 5. Self-realization needs; The order in which these five needs are met will be different.

Judging from the above five basic needs, the "independent and dependent" attachment relationship between husband and wife will inevitably have some needs for each other, and they are eager to get satisfaction from each other. This will lead to two situations. First, the unmet needs of the other party are always stirring in the heart, eager to get "psychological compensation" through other means, or go outside to find demand satisfaction. Second, once the needs are met, these satisfied needs will "disappear" in the hearts of the satisfied; The eyes are also "invisible". The more you repeat, the more satisfied you are, and the more "invisible" you are.

It seems that most people have this kind of psychology, thinking about unmet needs in their hearts and always being stimulated and pulled by unmet needs; But once the demand is met, it will be ignored or turned a blind eye, even disapproving, even disgusted.

For example, when you are thirsty, what you have in your heart, what you think in your mind and what you see in your eyes are all "water". Once you drink, you are satisfied, and there is no water in your heart, your mind and your eyes; Sometimes even after drinking too much, I still have a little disgust and disgust for water. So, sometimes if you are too kind to others and meet their needs too much, it is easy for them to ignore you and even get bored with you.

Husband and wife get along in the same way. When the other party meets some of our needs, we often ignore it and turn a blind eye to the other party's kindness to us. Sometimes the other person is too kind to us, and we even dislike each other. At the same time, we are used to staring at each other and are not satisfied that the other party has not met many of our needs, so we hope that the other party will improve and meet most of our needs.

Therefore, when couples live together, it is easy to ignore each other's good, but they often see each other's bad, and the other's bad is actually that their needs are not met from each other. So when two people get along for a long time, there will always be conflicts because the needs of the other party are not met.

However, once you divorce at the Civil Affairs Bureau, it means that the other party's previous needs will be completely emptied to zero, and these needs will be solved by themselves in the future. From the previously invisible "satisfied demand" to the urgent "unsatisfied demand", I began to think of each other's good. For example:

In the past, my wife took care of the children at home with a handful of excrement and urine, but she may have to take care of the children herself in the future.

There was a hot meal before I got home, but it was cold and cheerless when I got home.

……

So at this time, I will begin to realize that I don't want to divorce when I recall all the good things of my wife.

Some young people often feel: "When we were together, I didn't cherish his/her kindness to me. After breaking up, I feel that I missed the person who suits me best. "

Not only love and marriage, but also the psychological set of "you can't tell if you are satisfied" and "you are ready to move if you are not satisfied", which affects all aspects of us. For example:

I didn't spend much time with my parents when they were alive. I felt unfilial after my parents left.

When children are healthy, parents project their own needs on their children and ask them to learn this and that. The child is seriously ill, and parents expect that as long as the child grows up healthily.

I can't see myself when my body is healthy and my limbs are sound. It would be nice to realize that you are still alive after a serious illness.

At present, I can't see what I have. After I have nothing, I feel that I have a full mouth and a comfortable bed is good.

……。

Many people, including me now, always can't see it. Only when they are "deprived" will they know how to cherish it. In addition, what is even more frightening is that sometimes, after the "deprived" needs are met again, they don't know how to cherish them and become the same as before, "healing the scars and forgetting the pain", and so on.

For example, when a couple quarrels, one party makes a mistake, and then sincerely repents, and the other party forgives him; Maybe after a while, he will make the same mistake again.

To sum up:

(1), realize that people are "invisible" when they are satisfied, and always "restless" when they are not satisfied.

(2) Desire is sometimes: I can't see what I have, I can't feel it, and I am eager to get the stimulation and satisfaction of new needs. And desires are constantly being satisfied and constantly being upgraded. Desire is a derivative after satisfaction.

(3) The joy of a good meal for the poor may be equivalent to the rich earning 100 million yuan.

(4) If we can't see what we have, no matter how strong our desire is, how high our pursuit is, how much we get, and how satisfied we are, once we are satisfied, even if there are more things, we will naturally experience the happiness of owning. It's like being rich now is not as happy as getting a lollipop when I was a child.

3. Several ways to improve "knowing how to cherish"

We have been playing a psychological game of constantly satisfying and constantly seeking new desires, but the happiness index has not been greatly improved. Through the following simple methods, we can know how to cherish what we have now and feel happier.

(1) "Happiness lies in contentment": Through further understanding of cognition, I know how to consciously discover, see and feel what I have. At the same time, reduce or avoid the desire of unreal demand; Many years ago, I often thought about what I had, and wrote it down to adjust my mentality. The effect was very good.

(2) "Appropriate deprivation of demand": occasionally experience hard life or hard work. For example, I am so tired after a day's walk that I want to give me a bed, which makes me feel very happy. Another example is "it is better to get married than to leave", which is also an appropriate deprivation of demand.

(3) "Sometimes I have been thinking": When I have a lot of things at present, I often think about how I felt when I had nothing in the past.

(4) The more unhappy you feel, the more you feel that you have nothing. The above three points are worth learning.

Finally, when two people get along, they should see and feel each other's kindness to themselves and express this kindness to each other. Maybe the story will be different in the future.