Classic humorous jokes in class

1, a professor who has a sense of humor and is proficient in printing, in order to make students understand? Lead printing? And then what? Photocopying? Hold a simple demonstration of these two basic printing methods. First, he invited a beautiful female student to the front of the class and said to her, please put on fresh lipstick and kiss me. ? Then, pointing to the red mark on his face, he said to the students:? This is lead printing. ? Then he took out a white towel from his chest pocket and carefully printed a red mark on it. He raised his hand to show the class the clear traces and whispered: This is a photocopy. Photocopying is similar to lead printing, but the process is much more boring. ?

When going back to class, a boy who often sleeps in class fell asleep on his desk again. I don't know what dream he had. He suddenly raised the table and shouted: It thundered ~ ~ ~ Run! ! ! ! ? The whole class is dumbfounded!

When I was in high school, one of my classmates loved sleeping. One night I studied by myself. He sleeps on the table on his side. Leave saliva when sleeping. It happened that the teacher came in through the back door. Walk towards him. Knocked on the table with his hand. He raised his head. The teacher saw a large piece of saliva on the table. I can't take care of the teacher at once. Suppressed for a long time in a word. ? Do you want to clean the table?

There used to be a big man in our class. When the teacher needed to use the projector, he was responsible for preparing the screen and pushing out the equipment. Once he was sleeping in class, we sat next to him and suddenly woke him up and said, come on, the teacher is going to use the projector. He stood up and ran to the platform? The teacher was stunned at that time! Actually, we lied to him! ! !

Xiaoming wrote in an essay entitled "Visiting the Zoo": The zoo is called the zoo because it is full of animals. Animals are kept in pens, and only a few people often stop in front of them. There are always more people watching in front of the orangutan area, because people have a sense of belonging there?

6. The teacher asked: If you had only one day to live, where would you like to go most?

Student a:? I will spend my last day in this school and this classroom. ?

Teacher:? How touching! There are still such studious students. ?

Student:? Because I have it in the classroom? Days are like years? What a feeling!

7. My English was poor when I was cramming for the Buddha's feet in senior three. Reading late at night, I have been sleeping in English class. When the teacher asked me to answer the question, I was deceived! Once an English teacher was explaining a short passage to correct mistakes (I remember that when I fell asleep, the teacher was still talking about reading comprehension! ) I was awakened by the teacher in my sleep. As soon as I stood up, I said it before the teacher spoke? D, choose d? The whole class laughed!

8. When I was in primary school for six years, I went to the class of the head teacher. There were four shifts. Once a student dozed off in class, and then the teacher threw chalk at him. When I woke up, I thought it was thrown by the person next to me and shouted at the person next to me. The teacher asked him what was wrong. He said innocently, teacher, he threw chalk at me!

9. In chemistry class, the teacher took out a gold market, pointed to the solution in the glassware and asked the students: I just talked about the nature of this solution. Now, I throw this gold coin in. Do you think it will melt? Son, look at me, I look at you, and no one can answer.

Suddenly, Holt, who was sitting in the first row, stood up and said loudly, Certainly not. ?

? You answered very well. ? The teacher touched little Holt's head and said approvingly? You must have understood today's lesson. ?

? I don't understand either, teacher. ? Little Holt looked down and said.

? Then how do you know that gold coins won't melt? The teacher asked in surprise.

? If this solution can dissolve gold coins, how do you put them in?

10, the biology teacher finished Darwin's theory of evolution, and there was still a little time before class was over, so he asked the students a question: What is the closest animal to humans?

A student who just woke up scrambled to answer loudly:? Lice. ?

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