Humorous techniques for writing essays

1. Describe the people around you in a humorous and satirical way

Brief and humorous self-introduction: 1. Basic information: male, born in ** (true age will never be concealed), No marriage history, currently living in **. I am cheerful, sincere, have no bad habits (smoking, occasionally drinking 5 bottles of beer with friends at most; this is reasonable), I am in good health, and all parts of my body are functioning normally. **Province** people. The family has two tile-roofed houses and no cars. The career needs to be developed. 2.

1. Basic information

Male, born in ** (true age will never be concealed), no history of marriage, currently living in **. I am cheerful, sincere, have no bad habits (smoking, occasionally drinking 5 bottles of beer with friends at most; this is reasonable), I am in good health, and all parts of my body are functioning normally. **Province** people. The family has two tile-roofed houses and no cars. The career needs to be developed.

2. Function introduction

1. Mouth - can speak well, I believe you will not be lonely if you have it.

2. Shoulders - two, you can rely on, use as a pillow, ride on...

3. Hands - of course a pair, It can hold you tight when it's cold, and it can help you drive away mosquitoes in summer...

4. Feet - can bear 62 kilograms of weight. As long as you and I add up to no more than 250 kilograms, we can carry you for a lifetime.

5. Heart - No matter when and where, I will always think of you!

6. Body - No need for hot water bottles or electric blankets anymore. Experts say the human body has a constant temperature of 37.5. Absolutely durable and affordable. The most important thing is to save electricity!

7. Brain - Want to be lazy and not do housework? Scissors, rock, paper, fair solution, remember, I only produce paper, try and fail again and again!

8. Never ugly, most suitable as a husband. 2. Humor, rhetoric, and descriptive techniques should be used in a composition.

My Autobiography

One early morning in the early winter of 1996, With a baby's cry breaking the silence of the night, I descended into this beautiful world.

My name is Zheng Yi. Although it sounds ordinary, it is of great significance. The reason why I have a sense of justice is because it has the same pronunciation as justice; the reason why I quarreled with the young lady is because it has the same pronunciation as dispute.

Being thin is something that boys are afraid of, but my body just happens to be thin, so when I was in the fourth or fifth grade, many classmates called me "little". In fact, I was small and short. My mother asked me to eat more, but I still only ate a little at each meal. My mother often says that I don’t eat as much as the puppies in my hometown. =** I really regret not listening to my mother’s advice and eating more. Otherwise, would I have grown so short? It’s really “one mistake that will lead to eternal hatred”! But I'm a little fat now.

I heard from my mother that when I entered the kindergarten gate for the first time, I felt both happy and scared. When I heard that my mother was going to leave me here alone, I cried and made a fuss and refused to let her go. My mother had to lie to me and say she was waiting for me in the lobby. As a result, I didn’t see my mother after school and started crying and making a fuss again.

In the blink of an eye, I have entered the gate of primary school. In Erxiaoli, I learned a lot of new content, broadened my horizons, and made more good friends. In fourth grade, I transferred schools. In school in Shenzhen, I learned new knowledge and developed a strong interest in mathematics. In the fifth grade, I transferred to another school, back to the second primary school.

For some reason, I was naughty and fell in love with reading, but at that time I only read story books, which I didn’t understand. Although I love words very much, I have no literary talent. I like reading, but I forget everything after reading. Whether studying at school or entertaining at home, I often use jokes to create a happy atmosphere.

My ideal is to enter Peking University.

I believe that with my efforts and the education of my teachers and parents, I will definitely realize my ideals and repay my parents and teachers with excellent results! ! ! 3. Humor and irony are used to describe people's compositions

Lu Xun discusses irony and humor. Irony and humor are two very important expression techniques in literature and art.

Lu Xun often talked about it when discussing literary and artistic creation with young authors. He has repeatedly praised famous satirical writers at home and abroad, such as Wu Jingzi, Gogol, Mark Twain, etc.

He himself often uses satire and humor in his writing. What is irony? Lu Xun once wrote in "What is "Satire"? 》To answer the inquiries from the literary society.

He pointed out: "An author uses concise or simply exaggerated pen and ink -------but naturally it must also be an artistic place---write or a group of The group of people who wrote this work call it 'satire' if it comes from the human or one-sided reality." (Emphasis added by the author) In order to make us understand, Lu Xun once cited several examples, one of which is: dressing. The young man in a suit raised his eyebrows and worshiped the Bodhisattva, while Mr. Taoism frowned and became angry; secondly: a young man pretended to be an officer and swindled everywhere, but was later destroyed. The young man wrote a letter of repentance, saying that he was just taking advantage of this. There is no other intention to make a living; thirdly, a thief attracts students and teaches these students how to steal. When the parents find out, they confine their children at home, but the thief comes to seek revenge.

These things are often taken for granted by people, and naturally no one pays attention to them. "But at that time, this matter was already unreasonable, ridiculous, contemptible, and even abhorrent. But it continued like this. , I am used to it, even if it is in public, no one would think it strange; now it is mentioned in a special way, which is very moving."

Lu Xun thought that if materials like this came to Swift or Gogol. In his hands, he can surely write excellent satirical works. He said, "In the society of an era, the more common things are, the more common they are, which makes them suitable for satire."

So how to write satire? Lu Xun made specific clarifications based on his own experience and that of famous Chinese and foreign literary figures. There are three main points: first, "the life of 'irony' is real; it does not have to be a real thing that has ever happened, but it must be a real thing that will happen. So it is not "Fabrication" is not "slander"; it is neither "exposing secrets" nor recording shocking so-called "odd news" or "strange current situation""

(Emphasis added by the author) This is. The passage makes us know that satire is fundamentally different from fabrication and slander, and is also strictly different from anecdotes and even private secrets written by journalists. The satirical material must be true. People should see it with their own eyes and feel that such things are true, but they are embarrassed to admit that it is true and lose their dignity.

There is an exaggeration and an element of laughter. If the words are too broad, they will be distorted; if they are too humorous, they will be glib.

Therefore, the author must have a serious attitude in writing, be honest about life, and write the essence of the negative object in concise language. Only in this way can he overcome the problem of "explicit words, no hidden edge, or even excessive words" To correct the shortcomings, we should be "like casting a tripod to resemble an object, and the demons and monsters will appear in full scale." Secondly, we must clearly understand that sarcasm must be well-intentioned. "His sarcasm is to hope that they will improve, not to suppress these things to the bottom of the water."

...If a seemingly satirical work has no good intentions and no love, and only makes readers feel that everything in the world is worthless and nothing can be done, then it is not satire. , this is the so-called 'sarcasm'." Lu Xun believed that the sarcasm of "tearful smile" is fundamentally different from cynicism. This is that sarcasm should be kind to people, and it arises from the soil of shortcomings in society; while cynicism Ridicule is malicious and cold.

Although the two are only separated by a piece of paper, they are completely opposite. Lu Xun therefore called them "ruthless cynicism and affectionate satire".

Therefore, the content of satire is to criticize current ills, and to criticize current ills, one must "uphold the public spirit." Just like Wu Jingzi, the author of "The Scholars" praised by Lu Xun, and himself, they must "satire on the world with a public heart" and burn down the real society with the fire of satire. The false, evil and ugly in it.

Thirdly, satire should be "relative yet harmonious, tactful but full of satire." When the author describes the objects he denies, especially those social maggots, his heart is filled with hatred and a bitter smile. I feel that such characters are despicable and hateful, but I also feel that they are pitiful and pitiable.

So with the emotions of love, hate, joy and anger, with an objective, serious and serious creative attitude, using accurate, refined and simple language, or treating the selected subject matter with a slight exaggeration, to create a true story The description makes "no derogatory words, but the false feelings are exposed", producing a "laughing" effect. This method of irony and "straight writing" was often used by Lu Xun.

He wrote "Diary of a Madman", "The True Story of Ah Q" and "Kong Yiji". There is no discussion of the characters, only detailed narratives, but they are so ironic that they make "readers... , No matter what character you are, you can learn from yourself." Lu Xun also had many incisive discussions on humor.

What is the difference between humor and satire? Lu Xun said in the article "From Satire to Humor": "However, social satirists are dangerous after all, especially in an era when some 'literary men' have become 'the king's minions' overtly and covertly. Who is happy to be a 'literary prison' "The protagonist in the movie, but if he doesn't die, he will always be half-suffocated in his stomach, and he will spit it out under the guise of laughter."

The characteristic of humor is pointed out here. "Under the guise of laughter" conveys a certain thought and feeling, the language is funny or ridiculous, but the meaning is profound. The word "humor" is the transliteration of "humour". Lu Xun once said that it "cannot even be translated into free form"; however, when someone said that "humor is urban", he clearly expressed his "disapproval" and said: "China Farmers use humor more than urban citizens."

But humor is different from "just laughing". Lu Xun once said that there is a big gap between comedy and humor. , the Japanese once translated "humor" as "affectionate funny", which is to distinguish it from funny. As for being slick, frivolous, and obscene, they are not even humorous.

We must understand the true meaning of "humor" from Lu Xun's discussion, and use humor correctly when writing to make the article lively and interesting. As for writing short articles, humor is indispensable.

Lu Xun said at the beginning of "Lace Literature": "As long as it is not used to solve national affairs or arrange wars, and to say a few humorous words and smile to each other among friends, I think it has nothing to do with it. Even revolutionary experts sometimes have to walk with their hands behind their hands; a Neo-Confucianist always has children, which proves that he is not always polite day and night. 4. Looking for an article about writing about people, things, and things

Today is the National Day, because the wise and great ***’s achievements in building the country and caring for the people are countless, so we have a day off, and my parents specially took us to the zoo to play

As usual, we like to have breakfast Eat sweet potato porridge. Because the sweet potatoes were sold out today, my mother had to cut some taro to make up for it. Unexpectedly, the taro grown on the balcony was very delicious, and the whole family was greedy to eat it.

Before going out, I The milf's mother was so gorgeously dressed that she couldn't tell that she was a rotten wife. The father, who was still young, quickly changed his mind and became handsome. After putting on a two-pronged suit, he looked extremely handsome. It makes people shy away. Dong Shixiao's beautiful sister even put on adjustable underwear, dressed like a tiger and dog, and put on the newly bought high heels arrogantly.

We, a raccoon dog, rode in a plain carriage and white horses, and quickly arrived at the zoo. Unexpectedly, there were so many people visiting that the jackals and wolves invaded the jungle, causing our family to be separated from each other.

My father, who was separated from his wife and children, worked hard to broadcast everywhere, and finally found me and my sister, who was almost a father to a thief. During the battle between trapped beasts, we fought against all odds and pushed our way to the monkey fence, and took pictures of Zhang Qiangyan. Laughing family portrait.

Then go to the bird park where chickens and dogs croak, and enjoy the beautiful music of nature with the roar of the wind, the roar of cranes, and the mourning of birds everywhere. Later, when Dad was talking about deer and horses for us, a gust of cool wind blew, and the smell of dry saliva made people shudder. Mom quickly put on Dad's yellow robe and told us to wear his fur

In the evening, because of the holiday, the magpies and doves' nests in the restaurant were busy, so my mother took our mother and mother to move in three times, and finally decided to eat hot pot. There is a restaurant that has just changed its wallpaper. The walls are very beautiful. The lights are dim and surrounded by enemies. It is very atmospheric. The waitresses who are lying in ambush from all sides are busy attracting bees and butterflies for the guests, and they are busy encircling Wei and rescuing Zhao for the guests. They are so sweet and secretive that people mistakenly think that they are in the Western Paradise.

Being hungry, we ordered the mixed hot pot. Dad, who was still pregnant, gave a warning and asked the waitress, who was working around the house with a knife, to quickly cook the cunning rabbit and dead lackey, because our family was a vegetarian. We had already added oil and vinegar, and were waiting for the hot pot to sink quickly so that we could win the title of Central Plains. Unfortunately, the pot lid was too small, and it was a bit too much to cover up.

After the soup boiled, we were so hot that we quickly undressed and pushed the food. We kissed each other and caught everything in one go. Get to the bottom of it.

After the hot pot was devoured by us, it soon became only a drop in the ocean and a few fish that slipped through the net. When my mother, who still had her mother's example, wanted to throw away the winter noodles, she found that the flames were already in danger, so she had to throw a trap. Fortunately, the arrogant father Hulu and Pheasant called the clerk to put out the fire with salary, and the fire finally came back to life, and we, who were sitting on pins and needles, were able to line our own pockets. After the birds were gone, our family was working together, and my sister and I were so proud of ourselves.

Unexpectedly, when paying the bill, the boss showed his true colors and actually demanded a fortune. My father was so angry that he was so angry that his mother was so aggrieved that she cried in her clothes.

Ah! On this National Day, which I have been blessed with for three lifetimes, just after my father felt ashamed of himself in front of his wallet, our whole family was completely defeated! ! 5. Use the technique of contrast to write an essay describing characters. For example, the title costs 400.

Look at my Chinese teacher. He is wearing a black gabardine tunic suit, black wide-rimmed glasses, and a smile on his face. A middle-aged teacher, he is our admired Chinese teacher - Teacher Chen. Teacher Chen is knowledgeable and experienced in teaching. His classes are always so relaxed, lively, lively and interesting. We especially love to listen to his composition classes. His lectures are always interesting, humorous and fascinating, which makes us full of interest. We fall in love with composition unknowingly and gradually understand a little of the "mystery" of writing. "Jingle bell", the sound of class is ringing Now, this section is a composition class. Teacher Chen strode into the classroom. Today he seemed particularly excited. He walked to the podium and said with a smile: "Students, I am very happy today. Do you know why I am happy?" We They all grinned and shook their heads. Teacher Chen continued: "This morning, I went to the trade market and bought two old hens for one yuan. Do you think you can be unhappy?" \x03 \x02?\x10 The students coaxed Zhang Jin laughed so hard that she couldn't even straighten her waist. I thought: Teacher Chen must be joking again. But Teacher Chen said seriously: "Really, I never tell lies. If you don't believe it, I'll read it to you." As he said that, he picked up a composition book and read it aloud. It turned out that a classmate wrote in the composition that he and his father went to the trade market to buy chickens, and his father only paid one yuan and bought two. Big fat hen. The students suddenly realized that Teacher Chen was criticizing some students who wrote essays regardless of facts and made up random things. Teacher Chen said: "No matter how vivid your description is and how rich your words are, untrue articles are meaningless. , it’s not a good composition.” I think, I often make this mistake. For example, when I wrote about autumn outings, I always wrote “The spring scenery is bright and the flowers are blooming...” \x03 After this, when students write compositions, they always write Think carefully and understand deeply. When you encounter something you don’t understand? brgt; Another composition class. Today, Teacher Chen, who has always been amiable, suddenly dragged Chen Jun out of the door. We were all so frightened that we didn’t dare to take a breath. Unexpectedly, Teacher Chen closed the door and turned around He said with a smile: "Students, don't be nervous. Now I want to test everyone's eyesight. Are you familiar with Chen Jun?" "Familiar!" The students replied in unison. Teacher Chen then asked everyone: "You said Chen Jun today What color and style of clothes are you wearing? Are you wearing leather shoes, cloth shoes, or running shoes?" Everyone was stunned by this question. After a while, Teacher Chen asked Chen Jun to come in. In the classroom, we started to look around:\x03 He was wearing a sky blue zipper shirt, navy blue pants, and a pair of Jiefang sneakers. Teacher Chen smiled and said to us: "This is called careful observation." Then he continued. He told a few more stories about careful observation, and then arranged for us to observe the campus garden. This time we looked more carefully. We learned about each flower and plant in Huasuke, from their color to shape, living habits and life patterns. We all conducted in-depth observations, and some even checked relevant reference books. This time, everyone wrote better. Through this incident, we learned that only by observing carefully can we write a good composition. This is how Teacher Chen guided us Studying and writing. You said, can you not be happy that we have such an excellent Chinese teacher? How can we not have a strong interest in writing? . 6. How to write a good article, use rhetorical techniques appropriately, and have appropriate humor

1. When writing, you must learn to accumulate the following summaries from the ancients: "Reading thousands of volumes, writing is like having a spirit", "A clever woman cannot make a meal without rice". Both positive and negative aspects illustrate the importance of "accumulation" in writing.

"Rely on accumulation in daily life, and rely on performance in the examination room." This is the common experience of students in the examination room. (1) In terms of language, a "vocabulary library" must be established.

Vocabulary is the cell of the article. Vocabulary in a broad sense refers not only to the collection of words and phrases, but also to sentences and sentence groups.

There are two ways to build a "vocabulary": the first is reading. You should read extensively books, newspapers and periodicals, and take notes on your reading. Excerpt some beautiful words, sentences, and passages in a specific book, or make reading cards.

The second is life. Usually, you should capture the vivid language spoken by the public and write down these words in a small notebook or card that you carry with you. In this way, over time, you will be able to speak well and write wonderfully in your compositions.

(2) It is necessary to strengthen the accumulation of materials. Materials are the flesh and blood of the article.

Because many students don’t pay attention to accumulating materials, they make up or plagiarize every time they write. The way to solve this problem is to accumulate materials.

If possible, you can bring a video camera and tape recorder to observe life in depth, actively participate in life, and record family life, campus life, and social life in a timely manner through sketching, diary writing, observation notes, etc. experiences in. When recording, you should grasp the details and grasp the characteristics of people, things, objects and scenery.

In this way, the articles written will have flesh and blood. (3) Strengthen ideological accumulation.

Point of view is the soul of the article. If the center of the article is not clear or the intention is not profound, it often indicates that the author is shallow in thinking.

Therefore, it is necessary to establish a "think tank". There are two methods: first, think well.

"The more you think, the more you gain." You should think deeply at ordinary times and ask "why", "what" and "how" when encountering problems.

In this way, we can see the essence through the phenomenon. You should also record the "sparks" of your thinking and the conclusions of your thinking at any time.

The second is to compile, that is, to excerpt famous quotes, aphorisms, etc. In short, we must strengthen the accumulation of compositions and establish three major writing warehouses: "vocabulary library", "material library" and "thought library". They must be regularly inventoried, sorted and classified into categories, and they must be constantly enriched and expanded.

2. To write a good composition, you must first learn to observe. When Mr. Lu Xun answered the question of "how to write a good article" by literary youths, he emphasized two points: first, read more, and second, practice more. “See more” here means observe more.

This means: to write good articles and master skilled article writing techniques, you must observe more and learn to observe. Observation is the necessary prerequisite and foundation for writing. The Russian novelist Chekhov earnestly warned beginners: "A writer must train himself to become an observer with a keen eye and never give up! - He must train himself until observation becomes a habit, as if it becomes second nature. ”

Turning observation into a habit and second nature is a skill that takes time to hone. It is very effective and a great skill. You should pay attention to the people, things, scenery, and objects around you to obtain the materials you need for your composition: you should become interested in things that may not seem big but are actually very meaningful, and pay attention to the causes, processes, and results; you should Pay attention to how the plants in the campus flower beds change their colors throughout the year, and learn to inquire deeply to understand the ins and outs of these changes; you have to go out into the society, contact more people, observe their words and deeds, and think about something at any time. Merge them into the long river of your own thoughts.

This is the process of observation. During the observation process, you should pay attention to the following points: (1) Observation should never be limited to "seeing with your eyes". Observation in a broad sense and with more practical significance means mobilizing all the five senses of a person: listening with ears, feeling with body, and more importantly, thinking with heart and brain, so that such observation will be more delicate and profound. .

(2) Pay attention to the good use of "bad pen" during the observation process. As the saying goes: A good memory is worse than a bad writing.

Many students see a lot every day and think a lot, but they are not good at writing it down at any time. This will make the observed material go to waste and many valuable things will be wasted. Wasted. (3) Pay special attention to perseverance in observation.

Don’t suffer from "brain fever". Three minutes of heat is not beneficial to writing a good composition. You must observe and think about life throughout every day of your life, so that you can write Come out with wonderful articles and excellent works. Learning to observe has a huge foundation and impetus for writing good compositions. Without observation, you will often find it difficult to write.

I hope you can learn to observe, continuously cultivate and improve your observation skills, and make great progress in your writing practice. 3. If the idea is high, the writing will be successful. To establish the idea is to establish the center and intention of the article.

So what issues should we pay attention to when writing an article? (1) The purpose of an article must be correct and correct. Correctness means ensuring that the feelings and thoughts of the article are correct, in line with the nature and laws of objective things, in line with my country’s basic political principles, in line with the basic moral requirements of people, and able to Give people positive inspiration. (2) The purpose of writing should be specific. "Composition is more important than specificity. Specificity makes skillful, and divergence makes people stupid."

No matter how complicated the matter is, the main idea cannot be scattered. If an article wants to explain this issue and that point of view at the same time, and rambles on, the purpose will inevitably be unclear.

In fact, if you want to cover everything, you will definitely miss the point. Moreover, an article can only have one center. Instead of "biting off more than you can chew", it is better to concentrate on expressing one center, even if it is through several things. To express the center, we must also adhere closely to the center of the text, with consistent goals, focusing on the connection point between the material and the center, so that all the power contained in the material is directed toward the center. (3) The purpose of the article must be novel. The most taboo thing about an article is to follow what others say. A novel perspective is the core of innovation in composition.

Novel ideas require jumping out of the old box, not following conventional thinking, habitual thinking or original mental stereotypes, but using a unique perspective to examine the alternative content contained in the topic and avoid Write what others often write, and write what others have not written. Even the same writing object can always be approached from many angles, as long as we break the stereotypes of thinking, stand at the height of the times, avoid the "conventional" and pursue the "different", think from multiple angles and sides, or associate, expand, or make analogies , or in the opposite direction, where others have not yet done so, they can be there. 7. Use humorous and satirical techniques to describe characters in life.

How to describe characters? There are various methods, including indirect display with environmental description, direct revelation with psychological description and language description, and writing methods that use action description to reflect character and social life. The preference for action description can be said to be unique to any writer. Lao She once said that only by describing actions can characters stand up. In this sense, action is indeed a prism through which the character's psychology can be seen.

Action description Action details, especially the subtle movements that condense the character's personality, are often unique signs of personalized characters. Heavy close-ups highlight the character's personality and reveal the character's complex and profound inner world. The "extension" of the strict supervisor in life and death in "The Scholars" eventually made him another example of a miser in the gallery of famous figures in world literature. As for the pride of the impoverished Kong Yiji when he "discharged" nine cents of money on the nine-foot counter of the Xianheng Hotel,

Thick ink splashes reflect the character's character. Actions are silent language and symbols of the character's personality. Thick ink splashes describe a series of actions of the characters, which can make the characters stand up in the description of the action groups.

Psychological description: Psychological description is a basic skill in characterizing characters. It can be expressed in various ways, such as inner monologue, expression description, and association. Psychological description is often combined with action description, with the purpose of conveying emotions accurately, but no matter which method is used, it must be reasonable and reasonable.

This short article adopts the inner confession method. That is, it is expressed by "what the characters think". This kind of writing can best express the character's thoughts clearly. For example, "The little Gazi is full of energy. He bullies his opponent to be stupid, big, black and thick. He jumps around him like a monkey, always trying to use clever tricks and cold traps, as if he has the upper hand." A psychological description.

8. Use humor to write about people

A letter written by a thief to the owner of Shangzi

Hello!

Seeing the word is like seeing the face (it is better not to see the face)

First of all, I would like to apologize to you for opening the door of your house without your consent. However, Compared with my peers, I am quite particular. I do not use destructive tools such as electric drills and axes when opening locks. If you don’t mind, from an economic point of view, you can still use the original lock. I use my personality. I promise, I won’t steal repeat customers. Firstly, it’s not easy for you from a small family. Secondly, judging from my trophies, your home is not worth my second visit.

Brother, please tell me how I feel when you enter the house. You don’t need to hide it from me. You have just gotten married. I can’t figure it out. It’s the furnishings in the room that tell me. I’m also about to get married. , for this reason, although I was in a hurry and nervous at work, I always had love in my heart and did not carry out large-scale sabotage activities.

I really like the layout design of your new house, the elegant chandelier, the beautiful and warm window screens, and the charming artistic photo of your wife on the bedside. It can be seen that you are very lucky, buddy. In short, everything seems to be so enviable. Whenever a buddy can be like this, he will stop doing this business. Brother, let me tell you about my work procedures. This will help you sort out the battlefield.

There was a small safe in the living room. I spent a lot of effort to open it and took a look. I was quite disappointed. There were only ten letters there. After opening one letter and looking at it a few times, I found that It's a love letter you wrote to a little girl many years ago. If it weren't for time constraints and heavy tasks, I would have to read it carefully. Apart from this line of work, I only like literature and other things. For the sake of your privacy, I don't have to read it carefully. Your wife found out, and secondly, to prevent dollars and other valuables from being included in the envelope, I took them all away. When I opened the envelope later, I saw that there were no dollars, but I found that you, my friend, are really talented. The literary style of the love letter is really good, it's sour, and the lines are filled with alluring words. No wonder your wife is so beautiful. In addition, I drank a bottle of the juice in the refrigerator. It was very delicious. I really forgot what brand it was. The south room, which is your bedroom, is the place where I pay the most attention. Because of the rush of work, the bedspread and sheets were thrown on the floor. But don't worry, I walked back and forth wearing your new socks, so they didn't get dirty. Those things, including the TV and stereo, were quite good, but they were too heavy. I didn’t take them away, nor did I destroy them (for this alone, you should thank me. Some people in our industry smashed everything they couldn’t take away. ), but I took away the 36,700 yuan you put in the mattress. Thinking about it, you are not short of money. Otherwise, why would you keep so much money at home?

I went through all the drawers in the north room and only found a diamond ring. It might be a wedding token you gave to your wife. I didn’t want to take it away, but brother, I really need it for my wedding, so I didn’t. I took them away, but I didn’t touch the rest of the things, such as the toothbrush and the key chain. The east room is your bookcase. I thought you were a book lover, but when I looked through it, it was all prop books. They only had covers and boxes, but no real books. I was quite disappointed. However, the DVD "A World Without Thieves" under the bookcase was my favorite. I took it away. I heard that this movie is good. I haven't had time to watch it yet. I just took it home to watch it. Secondly, I also want to learn new techniques from my colleagues. What age is it? Knowledge is exploding and updates are too fast. Well, what will happen if you don’t learn? I advise you to replace the prop book with the real thing as soon as possible. As the ancients said, there is a golden house in the book.

Originally, my work could be more detailed, but because there were people walking around outside, I was not interested in fighting, so I ended it hastily. The gain (and of course your loss) is as follows:

Cash: 36,700 yuan

One diamond ring

One DVD

One bottle of juice

Ten love letters

The total price cannot be estimated due to the love letter included.

Although I want to write more to you to comfort your helpless soul, because I have a new task, it is inconvenient to talk more, and the love paper is shorter. Siyi has trouble sleeping at night. I will see you later (no) Sorry, let me copy a sentence from your love letter as the ending)! !

No name will be left

I went to hospital urgently under the lamp on X, month, X, year