20 1 1 The most classic joke?

1, why don't good horses return to grass? The grass in the back is gone.

2. Why must summer vacation be longer than winter vacation? Expand while it is hot

3. Why do geese fly to the south in autumn? Walking is too slow.

4. Why do most Buddhists live in the northern hemisphere? Namo amit Ba

5. Why does the Statue of Liberty always stand in new york Harbor? She can't sit down

6. Why did the frog lose to the dog in the swimming competition? Breaststroke fouls frogs.

7. Dogs never take a bath. Why don't they get lice? Dogs give birth to dogs

8. Why can Lao Wang's horse eat Lao Zhang's elephant? They are playing chess.

9. Xiao Zhang never touches the ground when he walks. Why? Because Xiao Zhang is wearing shoes

10, farmers raise 10 cows, only 19 horns, why? There is a rhinoceros.

1 1, Xiaoming's grandfather sings while brushing his teeth. Why? Brush is false teeth.

12, a fierce hungry cat, why did it run away when it saw a mouse? Run and catch it.

13, Xiaohong and her mother are in the same class. Why? Mother is a teacher and Xiaohong is a student.

14, why does the roof of the neighbor Lao Li's family sometimes leak rain, and sometimes it doesn't? It only leaks when it rains, but it certainly won't leak when it's sunny.

15, why do the two tigers fight to the death and never give up? Because no one dares to stop fighting.

16, the wolf dragged away the ewe. Why does the lamb follow quietly? The lamb has not yet been born.

17, there is a chicken and a goose in the refrigerator. The chicken froze to death, but the goose was still alive. Why? This is a penguin.

18, Xiao Chen went to the cinema at the weekend, but there was no one there. Why? People are one by one, not half.

19, what line do monkeys hate most? Parallel lines, disjoint (banana)

20. Xiaoming's stomach is obviously bloated. Why does he keep drinking water? Fall into the river and be forced

2 1, there are six steamed buns in the basin, one for each of the six children, and one in the basin. Why? A child is carrying a basin.

22. Xiaoming bought something from 75 yuan at 100, but the boss only gave him 5 yuan. Why? Because he gave it to his boss, 80 yuan

23. There is a monkey squatting on a telephone pole by the roadside. When the driver Xiao Li saw it, he immediately stopped the car. Why? Because the driver turned the monkey's ass into a red light.

Xiaoming always likes to break the alarm clock at home. Why does mother always ask her father who can't repair the clock to repair it for her? Repair Xiaoming

25. Xiao Li often socializes because of his work. Although she comes home early every day, her wife still complains constantly. Why? Because Xiao Li goes home every morning.

26. Pangpang is a famous diver, but one day, he stood on the springboard but didn't dare to jump. Why? Because there is no water below.

27. A taxi was driving normally on the expressway, but it didn't violate any traffic rules, but it was stopped by the police. Why? The police want to take a taxi.

28. A plane crashed and there was a serious explosion. The staff is cleaning up the wreckage of the plane, but no one is injured. Why? They are all dead.

29. There are two children who look exactly alike and have exactly the same birthdays. Are they sisters? They said yes and asked if they were twins. They saidno. Why? They are multiple births.

30. There is a woman in a swimsuit. She walked on the soft sand. Although all this is normal, you will find that there are no footprints behind her. Why? She walked backwards.

3 1, Xiao Wang and his parents travel abroad for the first time. Because of the language barrier, he seemed at a loss. Xiao Wang doesn't know any foreign languages, but he doesn't feel as inconvenient as at home. Why? Xiao Wang is a baby.

32. What are cloth and paper afraid of? Cloth is (not) afraid of 10 thousand, paper is (only) afraid of 1000.

33. What is the real estate in China? "jade"

34. How can I find the lost thumbtack immediately? Tread barefoot on the ground

35. Which part of a woman's body can be touched twice by her father, once by her boyfriend and once by her husband? Lips, when saying the words "dad", "boyfriend" and "husband"

36. What is something smaller than bacteria? Son of bacteria

37. What book has the most problems? Medical books

38. What animal can stick on the wall? Seal (newspaper)

39. What are cloth and paper afraid of? Not afraid of 10 thousand, just in case (cloth is afraid of 10 thousand paper is afraid of one thousand)

40. Who is the child of Red Bean? Nanguo (when those red berries come in spring)

4 1, what is the first thing when people wake up in the morning? open one's eyes

42. What chicken has no wings? frog

43. What is neither laborious nor comfortable to type? doze off

44. What water should be distributed as planned? salary

45. What are the products with the same production date and effective date? newspaper

46. What color are the teeth of black and white babies? Toothless

47. Is there anything that people don't like to eat? suffer wastage

48. The whole body of a pig is a treasure, which is very useful. What's the use of a pig to human beings? abuse

49. What books are not available in bookstores? posthumous papers

50. What are the flowers that bloom all year round? plastic flower

5 1, the diameter of a circular hole is only 1 cm, and an object with a volume of 100 cubic meter can pass through this hole smoothly. What is this? water

52. What animal has no sense of direction? Elk (lost)

53. Foxes are best at confusing men, so which "fine" men and women are fascinated together? alcohol

54. Which ancient man ran fastest? Speak of the devil.

55. It takes six hours for the train to go from Beijing to Shanghai, and it has been three hours. Where is the train? On the tracks

56. What time does the clock leave? This clock doesn't work.

57. There are some things that both buyers and sellers know, but only users don't know. What is this? coffin

58. What is the function of eggshells? Wrap the egg whites and yolks.

59. What must everyone do seriously every day? breathe

60. What car is not difficult to drive? windmill

6 1, what game, the winner doesn't get the prize, and the loser gets the prize? punch

62. Where in the world does the ocean not produce fish? Cihai

63. What bamboo doesn't grow in soil? firecracker

64. Would you please put nine horses in ten stables evenly and make the number of horses in each stable the same? Put nine horses in a stable, and then put the other nine horses outside.

65. What should a person do if he wants to become a millionaire overnight? have a dream

66. How to make a number greater than three and less than four with three chopsticks? Pi?

67. How can I drink to the bottom of a full bottle of milk first? Use a straw

68. How do blind people eat oranges? beat the air

69. What if uncooked rice is cooked by accident? Dinner is ready ~ ~ ~

70. A stick should be shortened, but it is not allowed to be sawed off, broken or shortened. What should I do? Compare it with a longer one.

7 1, kindergarten is over, but no children go out of the gate. What happened?

72. Confucius had three disciples: Gong and Zi You. Which one is not human? Lutz (referring to a deer as a horse)

There are four people playing mahjong in the room, and a policeman comes to take them to the police station. Who is the man left in the room? A man named Mahjong

74. Can a blue pen write scarlet letters? Of course, you can write the word "red"

75. Can you turn ice into water with your quick tongue? Remove two points of water from the word "ice"

In winter, the baby is afraid of the cold and refuses to take off his hat when he enters the house, but he obediently takes off his hat when he sees a man. Who is that man? barber

77. Which month has 28 days? There are 28 days in every month.

78. A group of women were taking a bath by the river when suddenly a strange man broke in. What do you think they want to cover up most? Men's eyes

79. A bull and a cow, guess three words! two (heads of) cattle

80. How long does it take to finish Peking University? One second is enough.

8 1, which tooth was lost last? false tooth

82. Iron will rust if it is left outside. What about gold? steal

83. How to distribute six oranges to five talents reasonably? Squeeze orange juice

84. What is the name of a beautiful woman who is afraid of losing her figure and not having children after marriage? An incomparably beautiful woman

85. What is the original number when the first number is 13 and the last number is 40? Forty three

86. Why are there holes in the newly bought socks? How to wear it without a hole?

87. There is a saying that everyone will mispronounce when they see it? What word is it? wrong

88. When the car turns right, which tire doesn't turn? spare tire

89. A man got on the single-plank bridge, but later a tiger came behind, with a snake in front and a cliff below. How did he finally get there? lose consciousness

90. There is a cow with its head facing north, turn right three times, turn left two times, and turn right again. Where does his tail turn at this moment? downwards

9 1, why does the egret always sleep with one foot down? Both feet shrank down.

92, I lost my ID card. What should I do? pick up

93. What will happen when Kirin flies to the North Pole? Ice cream (ice unicorn)

94. Butterfly, ant, spider, centipede, which one didn't get paid? Centipede, reactive power (centipede) is not rewarded.

95, 123456789 Which number is the most industrious and which number is the laziest? 1 Most industrious, 2 laziest (as long as you don't do it)

96. Is the candy male or female? Female, because it will give birth to ants.

97. A mother gave birth to conjoined twins, and her sister's name was Mary. What's her sister's name? Marilyn Monroe

98. Which is worse, elephant skin, tiger skin and lion skin? Elephant skin rub (elephant skin difference)

99. Which is dumb, the star, the moon or the sun? Stars, there is "the stars in the sky don't talk" in the song

100, which is the narrowest road? Enemy (the road to the enemy is narrow)