The happiest joke

The happiest jokes

The happiest jokes are usually short and easy to remember, but they can make people laugh in just a few words. You can watch them often. Let yourself relax, learn a few jokes and tell them to your colleagues and friends. Let’s take a look at some of the funniest jokes. The funniest joke 1

The professor made a bet with the farmer

The professor made a bet with the farmer.

The professor said: I ask a question, but you don’t know, so give me five yuan;

You ask a question, and I don’t know, how about giving you five hundred?

Farmers agree.

Professor: How far is the moon from the earth?

The farmer handed the professor five yuan.

The farmer asked: What kind of animal is it that has three legs going up the mountain and four legs going down the mountain?

The professor was puzzled and had no choice but to lose five hundred.

The farmer took the money, and the professor asked: What animal is it?

The farmer handed the professor five yuan, said I didn’t know, and then fell asleep.

Beggars and Peasants

There was a playboy who ruined his family fortune and had to become a beggar and beg on the streets. One day, the beggar met a farmer. The farmer said to him: "You are also a seven-foot man. You are missing neither arms nor legs. Why don't you work to support yourself?"

The beggar listened, and a little bit Not feeling ashamed, he picked up a branch and wrote four sentences on the ground: "I will eat in the morning and sleep in thousands of pavilions at night. I have not violated the laws of the court and let me do whatever I want in the world."

The farmer saw After writing the poem, he also picked up a branch and added two words after each line of the poem: "I'll eat thousands of meals in the morning, but I won't be full; I'll sleep in ten thousand pavilions at night, covered with grass; I haven't violated the court law, so it's okay; let me When the world goes haywire, dogs bite!" The happiest joke 2

The Rich Man and the Farmer

A rich man walked into a restaurant and saw a farmer eating cheap fried rice. I look down on him and feel that it is very shameful to eat with such a person.

So he said: "Bring a salad for my pet rabbit, and a steak for me." He also ordered 10 portions of fried rice for the beggars outside. After speaking, he looked towards the farmers.

At this time, our farmer brother finally knew that it was coming for him, so he said: "Give my dog ??a steak. And give me a rabbit that has eaten salad."

The Loneliness of the Farmer Uncle

There is a copy of the original question in the Chinese language exam: The teacher got chalk crumbs floating around, no, that is not chalk crumbs, that is the wisdom spilled in the classroom. Highlights.

The requirement is: the phenomenon of negation of things

A certain strongman: The farmer's uncle's field is full of radishes. No, that is not a radish, that is the farmer's uncle's loneliness...

The difference between farmers and city people

Three words for farmers to raise good children: 1. Children, if your parents are not capable, you have to rely on yourself; 2. Children, you must be a good person before doing anything. You can't do anything that hurts others; 3. Children, let go and run around. If it doesn't work, you can still have food to eat when you get home.

There are three words from city people that harm children: 1. Honey, just study hard and other parents will take care of it; 2. Honey, remember not to suffer; 3. I tell you, if you don’t study hard, you will never grow up. There is no food to eat.

Funny jokes

1. Female: Husband, can you give me some lucky money?

Male: This is nothing What kind of New Year's money do you want if you are not celebrating the festival? Besides, how old are you!

Female: Did you press me?

Male: Yes!

Female: Did you sleep with me?

Male: I slept!

Female: You pressured me and slept with me again and you won’t give me money?

2. Give it to me The blind date called.

Me: I have a day off today, shall we meet?

Her: OK!

Me: Can I ask you a question?

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She: Say!

Me: Now you stand up and look down, what do you see, tell me?

Her: Feet!

I hung up the phone silently...

3. I had a long trip, a big suitcase of luggage, and a ticket for the upper berth.

I asked my best friend: "What should I do if I can't get to the upper bunk because my luggage is so heavy?"

My best friend said: "Wear less clothes, let alone luggage, those men will still Said: 'Beauty, the bed is so high, can you get up there? Do you want me to hold you?'" The happiest joke 3

1. The most failed person in life is Tang Seng. Whether he is an enemy or a friend, he wants to Send him to the West, but he himself even dreams of going to the West.

2. When I was a child, I compared my academic performance. When I grew up, I compared my salary and income. Now I even compare the number of steps when walking! Please let me go, I just want to be a garbage that is indifferent to the world, but when I actually became a garbage, I found out that I even have to sort the garbage!

3. The handsome guy with a car is a chess player; the guy with money and a house is a bank.

4. Other people’s wives will be angry, but my wife is still inflating.

5. Life is not just about the present, but also invitations from your ex.

6. If having money is also a mistake, then I would rather make the same mistake again and again. In fact, I don’t care if I make more mistakes...

7. When your life doesn’t go your way, don’t panic. Look at your wallet and savings and just cry.

8. Although you don’t look very good, you are unique. The world cannot do without you, because without you, no one can bring out the beauty of the world!

9. "In the adult world, nothing is easy except gaining weight." "No, there are also becoming ugly and bald. I wonder how worried you are about being bald in your twenties." "

10. The north wind is blowing and the autumn breeze is cool. Whose lovely wife is guarding the empty house? If you have any difficulties, I will help. I live next door. My surname is Wang.

11. I am a relatively mature person, and things like not eating out of anger are always done after I am full.

12. When you were a child, you were called a turtle grandson by your grandma, you were called a brat by your mother, and you were called a single dog by others when you grew up. Your whole life will be like a beast.

13. In fact, the most disloyal thing in the world is money. We agreed to go out together, but it didn’t come back with me in the end. It was really a waste of all my heart and soul. Right!

14. If you like a girl, study hard, find a good job, earn a lot of money, and when she gets married, you can contribute more.

15. The parking lot in the community is so poorly designed, it’s like a maze. Every time I go out, I have to search for a long time before I realize that I don’t have a car!

16. No matter how high your martial arts skills are, you can’t beat a kitchen knife. No matter how good your Qinggong is, you can't fly like a bird.

Seventeen. What kind of experience would you have if you got back together with your ex? God’s reply: It’s still the familiar taste, and it’s still the original recipe.

18. There are two reasons for the emergence of leftover women. One is that no one looks down on them, and the other is that no one looks down on them.

19. Every time I swear to lose weight, I just say it loudly to scare the body.

Twenty. For the rest of your life, it will be you cooking, washing dishes, doing laundry, mopping the floor, whatever.

21. On the tenth wedding anniversary, the wife said to her husband affectionately: "My dear, tell me about your feelings in the past ten years.

The husband sighed and said, "Marriage is risky, so be careful when applying for a certificate!" ”

22. Don’t wear skirts when going out recently. It’s a nice day, but you don’t know if the weather is good or not!

23. The teacher said that we are all useless. But we will still tell you that we are outstanding in front of the next class of students!

24. Be my girlfriend, I will protect you and will never let other girlfriends!