Introduction to the content of encyclopedia

Joke Encyclopedia refers to male and female jokes, family childlike interest, love jokes, style jokes, ancient and modern jokes, campus jokes, social interaction, celebrity humor, China ancient jokes, funny videos, funny pictures, funny short messages, nonsense jokes, humorous teasing, nonsense jokes, military and political justice, religious folklore, hilarious masterpieces, dialect humor, funny cartoons, funny lyrics, anecdotes and hot gossip. * * * There are 26 categories, including 13 paragraphs, 3 funny articles, 3 interesting stories about hot spots on the Internet, 3 funny videos and pictures, 2 funny short messages and lyrics, 2 funny certificates and brain teaser channels. Tortoise is also called tuanyu or tortoise, commonly known as tortoise. Delicious and expensive. "Don't buy what you eat, don't eat what you buy" is really a senior gift, and public relations is ugly.

Star. Several people from a certain township brought turtles into the city to pay tribute. Due to different weights, it must be allocated by "position". In order to avoid mistakes, the official number is written on paper and pasted on the turtle's back. ..... In front of the government cadres' residential buildings, it's getting late. Unexpectedly, the bamboo basket was knocked over and the tortoise fled for its life in the dusk. The villagers exclaimed: "Director Zhao" escaped! -The biggest one. Grab "Director Qian" quickly-be careful that it bites your hand. Is that dark corner "section chief Sun"? "Secretary Li" is small and climbs fast, even if he can't find it.

evening

In the subway, a man found a pickpocket taking out his wallet and said humorously, "Dude, you are late!" " ! Although I got paid today, my wife started much faster than you! "

love letter

The young man wrote in a letter to his girlfriend: "I love you very much, and I am willing to go through fire and water for you." I will come if it doesn't rain on Saturday.

Unreasonable complaint

Two people eat together, only two fish, one big and one small. One ate the big one first, and the other flew into a rage. How inappropriate! He complained. What's the matter? Asked the other. You ate the big one. If I were you, I wouldn't do it. What will happen to you? Of course I eat snacks first. What are you complaining about? Isn't that little fish still there?

Keep your secret.

I'm only telling you this. Please keep a secret for me. B: Don't worry. I will not only keep your secret, but also tell everyone to keep your secret.

Wipe the glass

The father went into his son's room, praised him and said, "Well done, son!" " The windows are clean and bright. Did you wipe it with soapy water?

Son: No, Dad, I used a hammer.

The semester begins.

The primary school started, and Dongdong, who just turned 6, refused to go to school. Mom explained to Dongdong that the child will go to school at the age of 6 until 15. Finally Dongdong sat down at his desk with tears in his eyes and asked: Do you remember to pick me up when I was 15 years old?

teacher

When the bell rang, the teacher smiled and said to the whole class, "Students who are clamoring for school should not panic, and they will not delay class. Please don't chat with people who eat instant noodles. Tell the students playing poker in the back row to be quiet, and don't affect the sleep of the students in the front row. Students who look at the scenery by the window are called students who play basketball on the playground, so that I can arrange my homework. The students on the way remember to inform the students in the internet cafe about today's homework. . . . . . )

Braised duck

One day, the husband took his wife to the mall, and her wife took a fancy to a set of cosmetics, which was a bit expensive. The husband said, "don't buy it, I think it's best for you to face the sky!" " The wife asked unhappily, "Why? "The husband said," I like to eat chicken with white claws. " The wife reached out and slapped her husband in the face. The husband covered his red face and asked, "Why did you hit me?" The wife said flatly, "I love braised duck." "

The embarrassment of buying a gun is.

During the winter vacation, Xiao Ming was sent by his brother to buy a dropped gun (the kind that rings when it falls lightly). Xiaoming bought a bag full of money and went home. When he got home, his brother asked him, where is the gun? Did you buy it? Xiaoming patted his pocket proudly: Everything was there ... and then he only heard a few "pops". Tragedy happened-two brothers died together ... 3. When you go diving in the sea, be sure to bring your friends. If you run out of oxygen, your friends will help you. He will also help you if there is something wrong with your equipment.

Most importantly, if sharks suddenly appear, your chances of survival will increase by at least 50%. . .

The officers and men crowded together, shoulder to shoulder, with almost no gap.

The Great Xia sighed, "I wonder who can save the young master."

A man generously stepped out of the queue, put the child in a four-wheeled vehicle and rushed into the enemy line with his two-handed cart. His pace is mysterious and his figure is erratic. He only watched it a few times and then went out.

The Great Xia was surprised and delighted: "Your Excellency is a descendant of the ever-changing God?"

The man said, "No, I used to be a flight attendant on the train, responsible for selling snacks, lunch boxes, fruits and drinks."

5. "They said I had to define myself completely in Arabic, English and Chinese."

"What do they call you?"

"2B Youth"

On the wedding day, the bride told her husband affectionately, "Don't talk about you and me in the future. Say ours. " The groom went into the bathroom to take a bath and didn't come out for a long time. The bride couldn't wait and asked, "Honey, what are you doing?" The groom replied, "honey, I'm shaving our beard."

6. A man walked into a bar, asked the bartender for a drink, and then asked for another. After several drinks in a row, the bartender began to worry about the guest and asked him, "What's the matter?" The man explained, "I quarreled with my wife, and she said she wouldn't talk to me for a month!" " "The bartender thought for a moment and said," It's a good thing she won't talk to you! " The man replied, "Yes! Unfortunately, today is the last night! " 1. An old man flew for the first time. He slapped his hand against the plane window. The stewardess quickly stepped forward to stop him and asked, "What do you want?"

The old man said, "Why can't this window be opened? I want to vomit! "

2. A couple came out of the canteen, each with a bottle of iced tea.

Just as I was about to buy water to drink, the woman shouted to the man, "Hey, what do you mean by another bottle?"

Without looking back, the man said, "I don't know." So the woman threw the bottle cap on the ground.

When I saw this, I thought I met two idiots.

When they are far away, I will go to pick them up, blowing the wind and watching the sun. I can see it clearly, in four big words: thank you for tasting …

Today, two boys at school were fighting at the school gate, and they were in full swing. No one dared to come forward and pull away. One moment I don't know whose mobile phone is flying out, and the other moment I don't know whose money is flying out.

At this time, a buddy came over and said: true cow, explosive equipment, gold coins. ...

The police officer was angry with his subordinates: "You four can't catch a criminal. You are so useless.

Sir, although we didn't bring back the man, we brought back his fingerprints.

"Where is it?"

"On the face."

5. Someone asked a doctor to treat insomnia. Doctor: "How long does it take to sleep every night?" ? How long can you sleep a day? Patient: I fell asleep as soon as I went to bed at night and slept until dawn. Doctor: "How can this be regarded as insomnia?" "Patient:" I mean I can't sleep at work during the day. "Doctor:" What do you do and need to sleep during the day? " Patient: "Civil servant. "

6. A bottle of coke is eight yuan. On the train, the passenger asked the flight attendant, "How much is a bottle of coke?" Stewardess: "How big is a bottle?" Stewardess: "It's the kind that sells three yuan outside."