Who has super funny jokes and brain teasers? The more the better.

Father, mother, brother, sister, nephew, niece, uncle, aunt, son, daughter and cousin. You will say, "There are 12 people in this family." It's actually wrong. There are only four people in this family. If the answer is: a, b, c, d,

A and B are biological brothers and sisters. A is a brother, with a son C, B is a sister and a daughter D. ..

So: Father A is C's father.

A mother b is d's mother.

A's brother A is B's brother.

Sister a and sister b are a's sisters.

A's nephew C is B's nephew.

Niece D is A's niece.

Uncle a is uncle d.

An aunt B is C's aunt.

Li Yong laughed himself to death-he couldn't hold on!

1, a couple, guess the name of the food, and the wife signals her husband to guess. The word "steamed bread" popped up on the big screen.

Wife's description: round, white, edible.

Husband: ...

The wife continued to describe: just white and soft. You ate it last night!

Husband seems to be in a hurry and blurts out: "Mimi!" "

Li Yong laughed his head off. ...

The word "vinegar" popped up on the big screen.

Husband: What do women like to eat from men?

Wife (happily): Tofu! !

2, guess the word link, vividly say: What horse did Guan Yu ride in The Romance of the Three Kingdoms? The guesser didn't know, and the painter suggested: Think again, this horse was ridden by Lu Bu.

The guesser shouted, It's The Story Of Diu Sim.

Bi Hua was furious: You are so stupid. I said riding during the day!

Lao Li was laughed to the ground! ! ! !

3, a couple, guessing historical relics, the wife is guessing her husband. The word "Diamond Sutra" popped up on the big screen.

Wife's description: It has existed since ancient times and is very famous.

Husband: ........

The wife continued to describe: it is that nun who has to read it every month.

Husband seems to understand and blurts out: "menstruation."

Li Yong said, "Oh, my God! Cut the pilot. "

4, or the couple, guess the name of the item, the wife will guess the husband. The words "V3 mobile phone" pop up on the big screen.

Wife's description: There is a pink one, which is the most popular this year. You bought it for me.

Husband: ........

The wife continued to describe: that beautiful woman Sarapova has also used it, and it is also my favorite. The four-word husband threw caution to the wind and blurted out: "sexy underwear."

The hapless Li Yong laughed again. ...

5, a couple, guess the color, the husband gestured for his wife to guess.

The word "white" pops up on the big screen.

The husband kept gesturing, but the wife still didn't know. ...

My husband is very anxious, so ...

Husband's description: Li Yong's underwear!

Wife: White!

It is said that Cao Cao and Liu Bei cook wine to discuss heroes. It's cloudy and thunderous outside. After a few drinks, Liu Bei suddenly farted, which was embarrassing.

Guan Yu said frankly in the back: "Don't take offense, fart comes from feather (rain)!" Liu Beizheng is embarrassed.

As soon as Guan Yu's voice fell, Zhao Yun stepped forward: "Don't make a fuss, fart comes from the clouds!"

As soon as Zhao Yun said it, Zhang Fei shouted loudly: "Farts are flying!"

Everyone burst into laughter. Liu Bei has also returned to normal.

Cao Cao didn't laugh. He is deeply touched by this. After seeing Liu Bei and others off, Cao Cao said to his subordinates, "When Liu Bei's subordinates saw the master's mistakes, they rushed to take responsibility and make up for them. It's really loyal. If it is your turn, can you do it? "

The generals were filled with indignation and said with one voice, "Prime Minister, isn't it a fart matter? What's the difficulty! See it next time. "

A few days later, Cao Cao invited Liu Bei to drink again. During the dinner, he wanted to fart and see how his men reacted. After holding back for a long time, I finally managed to hold back a small Pi. Everyone waited for a long time, only to hear a "goo". The general was a hothead and quickly shouted, "Chu (pig) put the fart!"

The waiter Wang Lang immediately said, "Lang (Wolf) farted!"

Gou An said: This is Gou (dog) fart.

Cai Mao said: This is cat fart.

When Cao Cao stared, others thought that Cao Cao thought he was too slow to take care of himself.

Taurus said, "This is golden fart!"

Yu Xun said: "This is a fart!"

Cao Hong said, "Fart is red!"

Gao Lan said, "Fart is blue!"

Jiang Gan said, "Fuck!"

Sima Shi said: "Fart is the teacher's (wet)!"

Xiahou Yuan said, "Fart is deep (round)!"

ICY said, "Fart is square!"

Cao Cao was so frightened that he was about to have a fit. Guo Jia, the counselor, shouted, "No one is right, no one is right! Everyone is wrong! "

Worthy of being my number one strategist. Cao Cao secretly thought. Listen to him first.

Guo Jia said: "This is a good (fake) fart!"

Cao Zhen grabbed it again: "This is true fart!"

Cao Cao was so angry that he almost fainted and was completely disappointed. He doesn't want more people behind him.

Guo Huai said: "This is Huai (bad) fart!"

Zhang He said: "Fart is near (drink)!"

Sima Yan said: "Farting has inflammation (pharynx)!"

Huang Xu said, "You're all out!"

Xia Houdun said, "Fart escapes!"

Guo Tu said: "Farting is a picture (spitting)!

Xia Houba said, "Fart comes from bullies."

Xun You said, "You let the fart out!"

Man Chong said, "Fart is a pet!"

Jiang Ji said: "Fart comes from the economy!"

Zhong Youdao: "Fart is coming!"

Finally, Cao Cao couldn't bear it any longer and said angrily, "Nonsense, shit."

Complete works of jokes in mental hospital (full version)

What a coincidence! Also pointed to Sister Furong's chest-playing an idiom.

You pointed to her chest and said, "You Rong, big breasts! ! "(great endurance)

Mom and the fly were having dinner when suddenly the fly's son said, "Mom, why do we eat shit every day?" ? ~~

The mother fly is angry! "Say such disgusting things when eating! ! ! "

A recruit is always late for assembly and is trained! So one day he took off his clothes and drew a camouflage suit.

Sure enough, the rally arrived as early as the next day.

The instructor was very happy and looked around and said, "Very good! But ... don't put your hand in your crotch in the future. "

A mountain training for more than 20 days, the soldiers did not take a bath! ! I stink all over ~ ~ ~

The coach saw the complaint, so he said, people who want to change underwear stand up ... a row of people came out with brushes. ...

The instructor said, "Very well, now the army will change two farts, three cows and XX…… ..."

The above is handmade, I hope I like it.

A: Right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right, right.

Most students in a high school cheat badly in exams. At the meeting after the exam, the dean severely reprimanded everyone for the nonstandard Mandarin. He said: "... in this exam, the phenomenon of" fuck "is very serious. Some men fuck men, some women fuck women and men and women fuck each other. " Some "fuck" from the front, and some "fuck" from the back; Some secretly "fuck" and some openly "fuck". Everyone almost fucked the whole class. Only "Yang Wei" didn't "fuck" others. He is worth learning! "

Respondent: Yue11-Five grades, 06: 30 on July 25th, 2009.

Feel like vomiting

-Bi Qiang

Eldest brother and second child fly, and second child gets airsick and keeps vomiting. A bag is full, so the boss has to get it. When he came back, he found that the whole plane was vomiting. The boss asked the reason, and the second child said, "I think this bag is full, so I had to drink half of it and throw up."

A man saw a store having a big sale and went in. "What do you want?" "I want to buy dog food." "We have a rule that you must prove that you have a dog." "Where is such a rule?" "This is the case with goods on sale." The man has been grinding with the salesman for a long time, but the salesman still refuses to sell it to him. No way, the man had to go home and bring the dog before buying dog food. A few days later, the man went to this store to buy cat food. "Give me two boxes of cat food." "We have a rule that you must prove that you have a cat." It was the same shop assistant, and the man dawdled with her for a long time. As a result, he still has to go home and take the cat to buy cat food. A few days later, the man came to the shop with a big cardboard box with a hole and found the salesman. "What do you want?" "Just put your hand in and you'll know." The salesman put his hand in: "What is it? Very sticky. " "I want to buy two rolls of toilet paper."

Some people like the dish "spicy vermicelli pot" very much. Once, he went to a restaurant and ordered this dish again. But the waiter told him that the dish was sold out. "Is it really sold out?" He asked in disappointment. "Sir, really sold out. You see, the last one was sold to the gentleman at that table. " The waiter replied. According to the waiter's instructions, the man saw a very decent gentleman sitting next to him. The gentleman's food has been eaten almost, but the "spicy vermicelli pot" is still full. The man thought that a gentleman had wasted delicious food, so he went up to the gentleman and pointed to the "spicy vermicelli pot" and politely asked, "Do you want more, sir?" The gentleman shook his head gracefully. So the man immediately sat down, picked up the spoon and wolfed it down. After a while, he swallowed half. Suddenly, he found a little mouse lying at the bottom of the casserole with all its hair. In a fit of nausea, the man vomited all the fans he had eaten back into the casserole. When he had a stomachache there, the gentleman looked at him sympathetically and said, "It's disgusting, isn't it?" I was like this just now. "