What jokes did the insurance company have at the morning meeting?

1, insurance advertisement \x0d\ When I went out on the street on Sunday, someone put an insurance advertisement in my hand: "You can apply for our company's life insurance, so that if your hand is accidentally broken, you can get 20,000 yuan in compensation; If your foot is broken, you will get 50 thousand yuan; If your neck is unfortunately broken, then your family is the richest person in this city. " \x0d\2。 Consequence \x0d\ A man bought life insurance for his wife. After signing the contract, the man asked the salesman, "If my wife dies tonight, how much can I get?" The salesman replied, "About twenty years in prison." \x0d\3。 Vision \x0d\ Wife: "Why are you wearing my clothes? You're crazy! What's it like to be seen by other passengers? Take it off quickly. " \x0d\ Husband: "Shh, be quiet! I have no insurance. Don't you know that when a ship sinks, it always saves the female passengers first! " \x0d\4。 Life Insurance \x0d\ Father and son are walking back after visiting the night market. On the way, a robber pointed a gun at the young man and said, "put the money down!" " \x0d\ The old man jumped on the robber and said to his son, "Run!" "x0d" said the robber, "you old man are dying. \ \x0d\ "Yes, shoot, I have life insurance! ”\x0d\5。 At the insurance company, a customer stood panting at the counter and asked for fire insurance for his house. "Please be flexible and do it at once," said the man eagerly. "The house is already smoking." \x0d\6。 Prompt \x0d\ An insurance company salesman persuades a person: "You live happily today, but you may fall into a ditch tomorrow." \x0d\ The other party shook his head with great disinterest. The clerk went on excitedly: "Look at Mrs. Wang next door! He took out accident insurance of 654.38+10,000 yuan and broke his leg every few days. "x0d" I know, "the other party still shook his head," but that kind of good luck is not much! " \x0d\7。 Speed \x0d\ Zhang San: "I'm afraid I can't find a second insurance company to pay faster than our company. If our client dies unexpectedly in the morning, his beneficiary will get all the insurance money in the afternoon. \x0d\ Lisi: "This is nothing! Our headquarters is located on the 45th floor of the skyscraper. One morning, an insured person committed suicide by jumping from a window on the 70th floor. When he fell into the window of our company, we gave him all the insurance money by the way. " \x0d\8。 Advantages of old age \x0d\ An old man went to an insurance company for life insurance. "But, sir," said the employee of the insurance company, "you don't want all our customers to be over 100, do you?" \x0d "Why not?" The old man replied, "If you look at this statistical table clearly, very few people died at the age of 94." \x0d\9。 Insurance Application Form \x0d\ Insurance Agent: Shall we fill out this form now? How old was your father when he died? \x0d\ policyholder: Who said my father was dead? He is as strong as a bull. \x0d\ insurance agent: when did your grandfather die? \x0d\ policyholder: Who said my grandfather died? He is not only alive, but also a golf master. \x0d\ Insurance agent: Oh, when did your great-grandfather die? \x0d\ policyholder: Who said my great-grandfather died? He is now 126 years old and has just remarried! \x0d\ insurance agent: why 126-year-old man is still married? \x0d\ policyholder: Who said anything about getting married? He really has to do this. \x0d\ 10, waste \x0d\ My wife doesn't recognize the function of insurance, and thinks that paying insurance premium is waste. Mr. Wang quickly explained: "Insurance is for you and your children. In case I die, you also have a guarantee. " Mrs \x0d\ retorted, "What if I don't die?" \x0d\ 1 1, who \x0d\ In the new training class, the lecturer asked the trainees, "There was a man who paid a sum of money to an insurance company to buy insurance for himself, and the beneficiary was his wife. Later, he had a traffic accident on a trip and died unfortunately. So who should he belong to? " \x0d\ A student stood up and replied, "Oh, I think it should be a dead man, teacher." . \x0d\ 12。 He is engaged in insurance. \x0d\ A TV series caused a sensation. Actors are amateurs, and their roles are well grasped and natural. The reporter asked curiously, "That shrew played really well. Who is she? " \x0d\ A: "Oh, she is a bus conductor." \x0d\ Q: "Where is the underworld boss?" \x0d\ A: "I have been the police chief for many years." \x0d\ q: "Where is the hypocrite?" \x0d\ A: "I used to be a university professor, but now I am a government official." \x0d\ Q: "The innocent princess played a touching role. Who is she? " \x0d\ A: "I found it in a nightclub." \x0d\ Q: "Bandits? The performance is too natural. " \x0d\ A: "I used to be a city manager, but now I am in the tax bureau." \x0d\ q: "Where's the old liar? This person has no traces of affectation. " \x0d\ A: "He is a successful lawyer." \x0d\ Finally, the reporter asked, "What about the clerk? Work hard, be on call, work overtime without paying, and never complain. " \x0d\ A: "Well, it's in place. I have done group training in insurance companies before. "