Husband and wife are chatting.

When couples chat, every relationship is actually related to our personality and communication. In fact, as we all know, our feelings are full of many unknowns and there will be many changes. The following is a summary of words used by couples to chat.

Husband and wife chat 1 Practice the art of communication together: understand and say it again.

Many people ask me why it is so difficult to "communicate" with my partner. Usually I ask, what is your so-called communication?

Speak without thinking, pour out your heart, nag each other endlessly ... no matter how much time you spend talking like this, you can't solve the problem. Because this is just a conversation, not an exchange.

If you want to ask the other person a secret that you don't want to share, or force the other person to accept a request against his will, it is of course difficult to communicate. But if you just want to get to know each other better, such as "talk about his troubles", "talk about why he can't spend more time at home", "what are you up to recently", or shorten the distance, such as "please care about me more" and "do you want to know my thoughts", these should be regarded as basic communication. But many people also have this kind of communication difficulty, even the more communication, the worse the relationship.

Communication is like building a house. The two sides should first establish a good relationship foundation, gradually erect beams and columns, then solidify the fillers, and finally decorate. In other words, order is very important! You can't fill your mind with sweet words to communicate with others-sweet words are of course important, but they are equivalent to wallpaper, decorations and lights that come in handy after the foundation is consolidated.

The first step of "having a good talk" between people must conform to the principle of "reflective communication": let the other party know clearly that you have understood everything he said.

Reflective communication includes three main points:

The first is "caring"-caring about each other's thoughts, feelings and experiences, trying to understand, rather than trying to change. Based on this attitude, invite the other party to share.

The second is "reflection"-listen carefully to what the other person says, and then repeat what you hear. The so-called "reflection", you can imagine yourself as a mirror, faithfully reflect each other's words, don't distort each other's words, and don't embellish or speculate on your own words. At the same time, ask the other person, "Do you mean this or that ..." "Do I understand this correctly?" Ask the other party to correct our understanding until the other party agrees that "what you said" and "what I said" are the same or very close.

The third is "empathy"-expressing the acceptance and understanding of "putting yourself in the other's shoes"-"So you think so, no wonder you are sad!"

Not long ago, a couple generously shared their experiences on a TV program. Husband said that after having a child, his wife's attention is focused on the child, and he often feels left out. One morning, their husband and wife and two children woke up talking and laughing in bed, and then their wife and children got out of bed. The wife picked up the remote control conveniently, turned off the air conditioner with a "Didi", and led the child out of the room with a smile, as if completely forgetting that he was still in the room.

When the husband finished, the wife immediately responded: "How could I forget that you were in the room! Didn't I tell you to have breakfast later? I thought you were coming out, so turn off the air conditioner first, lest you forget to turn it off again! " My husband went on to say, "What do you mean I forgot to turn it off again?" ? When did I forget to turn off the air conditioner? You often forget it yourself, for example, last Sunday ... "Then the wife's rebuttal, the husband's more rebuttal, the wife's anger, the husband's anger ..." Finally, their conclusion is "Let's communicate less in the future".

If "reflective communication" is adopted

So what will the form of communication become?

After the husband finishes talking about the feeling of being left out, the wife should first absorb and reflect: "Is this how you feel-why did the wife and children turn off the air conditioner when they left the room?" Does the wife feel that she and her children are equal "everyone" in her heart, because the air conditioner will be turned off only when "everyone" leaves the room ... This makes you feel that I don't have you in my heart, and I forget your existence when I am busy with my children? "In this way, you can convince your husband that he is really listening to what he says.

Then try to understand why my husband feels this way, and don't rush off the responsibility. Of course, husbands should also adopt the same reflective communication with their wives. If they can give each other full reflection and empathy, many things can eventually find a harmonious way.

Husband and wife chat 2 how do couples enhance their feelings? Chatting before bed is the key.

1, affirm each other's efforts for this family.

Although the mode of getting along with each other and the personality of family members are different, it is common to affirm that the other party's contribution can make the family happier.

Everyone needs to be affirmed, and it is often frustrating to pay without recognition; It is not recognition, but severe criticism, which makes people shudder. Avoid quarreling before going to bed, learn more about each other's advantages, and affirm each other's efforts, so that the other party can be satisfied with being concerned that "my wife/husband still attaches great importance to me."

Introduce something new and agree to try it together.

It is human nature to like new things. Talk about new restaurants introduced by others at work, or interesting tourist destinations seen online, popular TV movies or music, funny jokes or amazing sports, etc. If both parties are interested, they can also agree to try it together one day, which will not only keep up with the trend, but also enhance their feelings!

3. Talk about the happy memories of both sides.

Childhood anecdotes, romantic memories in love, interesting people or things met … These happy things can be shared with each other, and sharing happiness can double happiness.

There are also some unhappy but not too sad topics to talk about, such as the wonderful teachers who have experienced and the hardships of the college entrance examination. Talking about these past events can enhance mutual understanding and draw the hearts of both husband and wife closer.

4. A better life for two people in the future

Looking forward to the future can inspire both sides to work harder towards the present goal. You can talk about your plans for the future and what you can do to improve your family situation. You can also imagine what they want to do when they get rich overnight. Imagination is infinite. Imagine what you want, in case it comes true! Let the beautiful imagination temporarily liberate each other from the hard life.

5. Express your love for each other.

It is most sincere to express love with actions, but expressing love for each other with words before going to bed can make both sides' hearts sweeter than honey. Always express your love to your spouse, don't hide it in your heart and be embarrassed to say it. Praise each other for getting more and more beautiful/handsome, getting better and younger ... no matter men or women, sweet words are sometimes more effective than any action.

Happiness is similar, but unfortunately it is different. The most important thing between husband and wife is frank communication. Make good use of this undisturbed communication opportunity before going to bed, avoid quarrels, talk peacefully, and let each other's love grow stronger and stronger.

How do couples chat?

1, continue the topic

The most common way of silence should be not knowing how to continue the topic, or not finding a new topic after that. No matter what makes you chat with your sister, you will always finish talking. Then change the subject at this time. Or it is very important to open a new topic. Because girls are generally passive, generally speaking, it depends on boys to change the topic.

2. Have a sense of humor

Although humor is not necessary to attract people, a sense of humor is the best way to attract people in a short time. It is difficult for you to have a good impression on a dull person in a short time, but if this person is humorous, close and has high emotional intelligence. Maybe you can become good friends in a day or two. Girls often like you because of their sense of humor.

You can cut to the chase logically.

There is no logic, no focus, especially when you don't think clearly about what to say before you speak. Will make others listen to you, there is no way to concentrate, others will think you are a very boring person, if a man has no logic, girls will think you are not reliable at all, and will feel embarrassed to listen to you. Then men need to solve this problem, and we need to do some training to speak the language better.

How can chatting between husband and wife enhance feelings?

1. Couples can talk more about love stories. Many couples will say, "We are an old married couple, why should we talk about love stories?" In fact, this idea is wrong. Everyone likes his lover to love him forever, praise him, and hope that his own advantages can be affirmed by the other party. His lover goes out to work every day. He can say "Dear, I will miss you" to his lover or get along alone.

A sense of humor can be used to break the tense atmosphere. The two sides have been getting along for a long time, and there is no way to run in, which will lead to many disputes or contradictions. If you don't try to stop them, it's easy to quarrel and even break up your feelings. Then couples can use humor to ease the tense atmosphere. When quarreling, you can tell some humorous jokes or make some humorous actions to make the other party laugh and cry, so that the contradiction will not escalate.

Ways for lovers to chat to enhance their feelings

1, tell your troubles.

Husband and wife can't * * enjoy happiness, but also * * * suffer. So, when you are in trouble, you can talk to someone next to you. Doing so will make the other person feel that you need him and show his existence around you. If he can enlighten and comfort you, then your feelings will be closer.

2. Recall past memories

In the process of getting along, two people will experience many things together, so there will be more or less memories. If you have a sad past, you will naturally have good memories. As the saying goes, you are in pain and happy. If one day you find that two people's feelings tend to be dull, you can find a time to talk with each other about those good memories, so that you can feel each other's goodness better and have more living languages between you.

Step 3 get to know each other's circle of friends

The same is true with friends at ordinary times. Asking about the recent situation of your friends can lead to many topics. Moreover, being able to enter each other's circle of friends itself represents a kind of trust and recognition. Being friends when you have nothing to do at ordinary times, don't always confine yourself to your own small world, not only can you get to know each other better, but also promote the relationship between friends.

4. Check each other's strengths and weaknesses.

Although married, we are not sure that we know each other very well. Some couples don't know each other all their lives, so we must learn to check each other's advantages and disadvantages, and then find countermeasures, how to solve the shortcomings and carry forward the advantages.

5. Say more sweet words to please each other

Reflect on yourself. Do you seldom talk about love affairs after marriage? If so, it's time for a review. Husband and wife should learn to manage and care for love in this way. Although love words are not based on words, they are also expressions of love.

Ways for couples to enhance their feelings every day.

1, affirming each other's efforts for the family.

The first rule of marriage management is to learn to be grateful. Learn to be grateful before you know how to love others. Although husband and wife have different roles and responsibilities in the family, they also need to affirm each other's efforts for the family.

2. Talk about something interesting and new.

When two people are together for a long time, it is inevitable that they will feel bored and boring. Once the novelty in marriage gradually weakens, the relationship between husband and wife is prone to problems. So, before going to bed, you might as well tell your partner about your day's life and what interesting things you have encountered.

3. Recall the happy time of two people in the past.

The relationship between husband and wife can not be maintained without fond memories of the same experience. Everyone's love experience is different, and the happiness in memories is different. Therefore, before going to bed, you might as well always recall the romantic fun between husband and wife and talk about the feelings you experienced at that time. For example, when you are in love, the other person clumsily expresses love, but it touches your heart.

Step 4 look forward to a bright future

In addition to living a dull life together, two people also need to have certain positive goals for the future. Discuss your future plans together before going to bed. For example, I want to buy some fitness equipment for my family, and we can work out together after work. Some goals that can make the quality of life better and better, so that marriage will be more meaningful. Of course, the vision here does not mean blind fantasy.