What is the joke I heard?

An ant saw an elephant coming towards it. It buried itself in the soil, only one faded. The rabbit asked him why, and he said, shh, don't make any noise, I'm going to kill that son of a bitch!

The next day, the rabbit saw an elephant bury itself in the soil, leaving only one leg exposed. Curiously, he asked why the elephant's eyes suddenly filled with tears and curled his mouth in injustice: "Yesterday, that damn ant smashed my brother into a plant elephant, and I want to avenge my brother!" At least mix him with schizophrenia! "

The rabbit met an ant who came in a hurry on the road, so he kindly asked it to avoid the elephant. The ant scoffed: "Damn elephant, it's really unappreciative! Let him pat his ass and walk like an elephant! Be careful that I'm not polite to him! Run wild on my site! "

As a result, the ant walked over angrily and tripped the elephant's exposed feet with one lift!

It turned out that this ant was imported, and the elephant said, "I am convinced!" After all, even the moon in the United States is rounder than that in China, and so are ants! "

Ants seriously confuse elephants. At night, the rabbit saw ants passing by his door in droves. The rabbit quickly asked one of the ants, "What are you doing with so many ants?" The ant replied, "the elephant is injured and needs blood transfusion in the hospital." Let's donate blood to elephants! " "Rabbit:! ? ￥.-**"。

The next morning, the rabbit saw the ants striding back. He asked one of the ants, "Why are you all back?" Ant: "tmd, there are so many brothers whose blood types are different from those of elephants." Only one ant has the right blood type, so we left him to donate blood, and we came back ~! "

The rabbit fainted after hearing this. ..

Not long after the elephant was discharged from the hospital, he gathered all his brothers and sisters and peed all the ant holes he could see. The rabbit saw it and wondered, "Why did you bite and feed your hand?" "The elephant said angrily," This is the most poisonous trick of ants. The ants who donate blood have AIDS. "

The next day, the rabbit found that a large number of ants died and ran to ask. Ant cloud: "The elephant that urinates is from Beijing. It has SARS!" " "

Such revenge

A five-year-old child went to a five-star hotel.

His manager said, "find me a young lady."

The manager said, "We are a five-star hotel with no ladies."

So the child threw out 5000 yuan and said, "Is there a lady?"

The manager said, "Yes."

The child said, "I want to be sick."

The manager said, "Our five-star is not sick."

The child threw out 5000 yuan and said, "Find me a sick one."

The manager said, "Some of them are sick."

The child asked the manager, "I slept with a sick lady." Am I sick, too? "

The manager is afraid to speak.

The child threw out 5000 and said, "am I sick, too?"

The manager said, "that didn't run." I definitely did it. "

The child said, "Then I did it with our nanny. Is our nanny also sick? "

The manager said, "It didn't run. I definitely did it. "

The child said, "Then our nanny had sex with my father. Is my father sick too? "

The manager said, "It didn't run. I definitely did it. "

The child said, "Then my father and mother did it, so is my mother sick?"

The manager said, "It didn't run. I definitely did it. "

The child said, "Then my mother fucked our driver. Is the driver sick? "

The manager said, "It didn't run. I definitely did it. "

The child thought about it, patted the table and said, "Hum! Smelly driver, I let you crush my little frog. "

Rogue son's school leave! !

Teacher Wang:

Hello. I want to ask for leave. I didn't want to, but my father was cut off yesterday for collecting protection money. I can't find anyone today, and he asked me to make up the number.

Miss Wang, please rest assured that I won't be cut with a knife. Although I was only in Grade Two, I had a fight with Xiao Qiang in the next class last year. He was in the fifth grade at that time. Finally, I dragged him into the hospital and got eight stitches. Hospitalization 1 week. I went easy on him at that time. My father said that if you find fault with others, you must work hard, so I took Xiao Qiang to the hospital according to my father's persuasive instructions. So please rest assured that I won't let you lose face.

By the way, Mr. Wang, if someone bullies you, please tell me my name. My name is in this area. Who listened? Give me three points. If they don't give you face, you can give my dad's name and see who dares to touch you.

Miss Wang, I will come back to school as soon as I help my father. If the headmaster comes and finds me out, don't tell him. Because my dad was cut by that son of a bitch principal yesterday.

Miss Wang, please rest assured that I will remember your words. I won't go easy on you.

If I don't come back within two hours, please ask Mr. Wang to call the hospital and get some notes. Miss Wang, please believe me, I will return home in triumph.

I must help my father out of this tone. I'm sure you will also speak for my father. A family of six lives entirely on his protection money. Since someone is making trouble, I should show my face. Besides, if I don't cut that son of a bitch, the principal thinks my family is easy to bully and will cut off my family's financial resources. I went. ...

Dude ... no ... we are. ...

She remembers that day. ...

It was a hot afternoon,

There was a test today, so I went home early.

When I got home, I had already come back.

Seems thoughtful and in a daze (maybe hungry)

Brother, are you hungry? I'll get the rice and eat it later. ..

(I didn't answer her)

She went to the kitchen to prepare cooking.

soon

There seems to be someone behind her. Looking back, I suddenly appeared behind her.

Oh! Brother, will you make a sound next time? You scared the crap out of me.

(strange! Brother's eyes are red)

At this moment, I suddenly grabbed her hand and she got a fright.

Brother, he slowly took that out at this time.

As soon as she saw it, she knew what had happened

She has been struggling.

Dude ... I can't! We're brother and sister ... if mom finds out ...

But I went without listening.

I've been begging her so hard that she's dizzy.

Seems to have lost his judgment.

Actually, I made a serious mistake in such a daze.

She regretted it afterwards. ...

But she was afraid to tell her mother. ....

So she said to my brother ...

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Brother! Next time you force me to sign your failed test paper, I'll tell my mother. ..

I want to hit the wall for five minutes ...