Encyclopedia of classic jokes makes you laugh till you twitch.

Introduction: The following are some classic old jokes. I have seen them n times. Will you laugh out of breath? These cold jokes may have been read by readers, but they are still humorous every time, hoping to bring some happiness to readers.

1. Two cows are eating grass together. The green cow asked the black cow, "Hello! What's the smell of your grass? "

The black cow said, "Strawberry flavor!"

The green cow leaned down and took a bite, and shouted angrily, "You lied to me!" "

The black cow gave him a contemptuous look and replied, "Idiot, I said grass is tasteless."

2. The man went to the toilet and asked next door: Are you there?

The man said: Yes.

Next door asked again: What are you doing here?

Man: Shit, what can you do here?

Next door asked: When do you leave?

Male thought: sick! Go when you're done!

Ask next door: Will you come to my house later?

Man Zhen: Shit, it turned out to be gay! Scold: * * * Go to hell, pervert!

The next door said, well, hang up first, I'll call you back later, and a * * next to him answered sentence by sentence.

3. The earthworm family got bored one day, so the little earthworm cut himself in two and played badminton.

Mother earthworm thinks this method is good, so she cuts herself into four sections and plays mahjong.

Father earthworm bowed his head and thought about it, so he cut himself into a dozen pieces and turned it into minced meat. ...

Mother earthworm cried, why are you so stupid? You will die if you cut it like this!

Father Earthworm said weakly: ... I suddenly want to play football.

The tortoise raced with the rabbit, and the rabbit quickly ran to the front.

The tortoise saw a snail crawling slowly on the road and said to him, Come on up, I'll carry you. Then the snail came up.

After a while, the tortoise saw another ant that couldn't climb fast, and said to him, come up, too. Let me carry you. So the ants came up. The ant came up, saw the snail above, greeted the snail and said, hello! Do you know what the snail's answer is

The snail nervously said to the ant, Hurry up, this turtle runs too fast. ...

5. A Dai went fishing by the river. He first used bread as bait, but no fish took the bait for a long time. ...

Then he changed another earthworm, and after waiting for a long time, no fish took the bait. ...

No way, he had to change another shrimp, but there was still no fish to bite. ...

Finally, A Dai, who became angry from embarrassment, took out 100 yuan as bait and fell into the water, saying, Shit, buy whatever you want!

A Dai was starving in the desert when suddenly he found a magic lamp.

The fairy in the magic lamp said to him: I can only realize your one wish.

A Dai: I ... I will. ...

The magic lamp fairy said impatiently, hurry up, I'm in a hurry.

Man: I … I want a wife …

When the magic lamp fairy heard this, she immediately conjured up a stunning beauty for him, and then said contemptuously: Everyone is starving and coveting beauty. It's really sad! Then he disappeared.

A Dai just continued: ... Cake.

7. There is a Grenade. One day, after eating, it cleaned its teeth. Suddenly, it found a thorn between its teeth, so it hit it hard and exploded. ...

8. In May, in a dry place, a man went to ask a charlatan when it would rain. After a while, the charlatan handed him a folded piece of paper and said, because cats can't leak rain, they can't open it until it rains. It rained soon, and the man opened the note and saw that it said-it rained today, and he sighed, it's fucking accurate!