Who can write interesting punctuation marks is to break ancient poems or sentences!

1. Ancient poems are mixed into different interests

1. "Qingming Festival" by Du Mu

"It rains a lot during Qingming Festival, and pedestrians on the road want to die. Excuse me, where is the restaurant? The shepherd boy points to Xinghua Village."

This is a famous work by Du Mu, a poet in the Tang Dynasty. Have you thought about it? Just punctuation can make it change its style.

Look at this:

"It rains during the Qingming Festival, and pedestrians on the road are trying to kill their souls. Excuse me, where is the restaurant? There are shepherd boys, pointing to Xinghua Village. "

-it has become a long and short sentence.

Look again:

[ During the Qingming Festival, there are many rains on the road ]

Pedestrians (trying to kill their souls): "Excuse me, where is the restaurant?"

shepherd boy (pointing): "Xinghua Village!"

-it's a script.

2. Wang Zhihuan's "Liangzhou Ci"

The Yellow River is far above the white clouds, and it is a lonely city of Wan Ren Mountain. Why use the sad willow song to complain about the spring delay, the old Yumen pass, a spring breeze is not blowing ah!

There was a calligrapher in the Qing Dynasty. He wrote this poem by Wang Zhihuan as a banner and gave it to Empress Dowager Cixi. Unexpectedly, one of the words "Jian" was accidentally left out, and Empress Dowager Cixi was furious. I think this is a fool for her ignorance of poetry. The calligrapher was frightened by this "crime of deceiving the monarch" and used his quick wits. He said that the words he wrote were based on Wang Zhihuan's poetry: "The Yellow River is far up/the white clouds are scattered/the lonely city of Wan Ren Mountain/the Qiangdi why complain/the spring breeze of the willows/the lack of Yumenguan". Empress Dowager Cixi saw that he was right, so she had to give up and gave wine to suppress the shock.

Second, the ancient people's games < p On one occasion, he hired a teacher to explain that the diet was very meager. At that time, the teacher promised, but he said that there was no evidence and asked for a certificate. The rich man readily promised. The teacher wrote a contract: "It is enough to eat without chicken or duck or fish or a dish of vegetables every day." The rich man looked at the contract and read it carefully: "It is enough to eat without chicken or duck or fish and a dish of vegetables every day." I signed the contract gladly. I didn't know that when I ate my first meal, the teacher shouted, "Why are all vegetables and no fish?" Didn't we agree to have meat for every meal? " After speaking, I read the contract to the rich man once. The rich man was speechless after hearing this. In the future, every meal will be cooked with fish for this teacher. Please think about how this teacher read this contract.

(answer: daily meal: no chicken, duck is ok; No fish, meat is ok; A dish of green vegetables is enough. )

2 Punctuation suicide note: Once upon a time, an old man was so excited that he couldn't afford a stroke and stayed in bed for five years. Before he died, he left a suicide note to his 5-year-old child and son-in-law. The suicide note reads:

"A 6-year-old son gives birth to a son, but it's not my son's fault, and he has to pay all his possessions and fields, so he can't argue with his son-in-law and outsiders."

after a few years, the youngest son will be separated from his brother-in-law when he comes of age. Who owns the property and countryside? The two men argued endlessly and had to go to the yamen to file a lawsuit.

The son-in-law pleaded: "It is clearly written in the father-in-law's suicide note: sixty old children give birth to a son, and people say,' It's not my son!'" The family property is paid to the son-in-law, and outsiders are not allowed to argue.

The county magistrate carefully pondered the untitled suicide note and came up with another method to break the inheritance with his youngest son. How do county officials punctuate?

(Answer: A 6-year-old gives birth to a son. People say wrong, but it's my son! Give everything you have. A son-in-law is not allowed to argue with outsiders. )

3 Hotel couplets

There is a man who runs a wine shop and also makes vinegar, and raises pigs with scraps, but this man is famous for being stingy. Once, he invited a scholar to write couplets for his workshop, asking him to wish the business of the workshop prosperous and his family prosperous and rich in financial resources. The scholar wrote a couplet and a horizontal batch without punctuation, and read it to him:

Make a good wine jar and make it sour;

the pig is bigger than the mouse.

horizontal criticism: many people, few diseases, and wealth.

The man was very happy to hear that, but he refused to pay according to the price agreed in advance, and only gave half. The scholar didn't bargain with him and left with the money.

The next day, many people gathered around the front of the wine shop to laugh. When the man went out to watch, he found that the couplet had been punctuated, but the meaning was completely reversed, and he rolled his eyes with anger. Do you know how punctuation is added?

(Answer: The vats are good for vinegar, but the jars are sour. Raising pigs is the first big mouse, and only dies. Horizontal criticism: many people are ill, but less wealth. )

4 marching orders

On a rainy day, a man arrived at his friend's house and could not leave, so he had to stay at his friend's house temporarily. But this friend is a very stingy person and won't be received. This friend was too embarrassed to speak out, so he had to write a note and leave it on his desk. The note reads: "Keep the guests in rainy days and stay with me every day" without punctuation. After reading it, the passer-by felt that his friend was not interesting enough, so he raised his pen and punctuated the original article, which became a direct inquiry. Do you know how they break sentences?

answer friend passing by: If it rains, stay for a day, will you stay with me? Stay!

on rainy days, stay? Leave me alone!

Miserable friend: Stay in rainy days, and I won't stay in days.

5. auspicious words

a person is always sued. During the Chinese New Year, he said to his family, "No one can go to court this year." And posted a couplet that said, "Good year, less bad luck, no lawsuits." It's just not punctuated As a result, the younger son read this couplet when he came to visit relatives, which surprised the whole family. What he read was: "This year is very unlucky, and there are many lawsuits."

6. The cunning of the matchmaker

In ancient times, marriage events were the orders of parents and the words of the matchmaker. At that time, a matchmaker interceded for the young master of a large family and wrote a line: dark hair without pockmarked feet is not very handsome. He also said that the girl's appearance was guaranteed as written on the note. When the large family saw it, they were elated and allowed the marriage. The big family got even with the matchmaker. The matchmaker refused to admit it, saying that her note clearly stated: dark, hairless, pockmarked, with small feet, Zhou Zheng.

Third, modern stories

1. Who panicked?

An English professor wrote the following sentence on the blackboard: "A woman is nothing without her (her) man", and asked her students to mark punctuation correctly.

The male student's goal is: "A woman, without her man, is nothing."

The female student's goal is: "Woman: Without her, a man is nothing."

2. A child's diary

A child wrote punctuation marks in the wrong place when writing a diary, which caused great contradiction between father and mother. This sentence is "My uncle kissed my mother and kissed me." In fact, it really means "my uncle kissed me and my mother kissed me." It is the wrong use of punctuation marks that makes the contradiction between father and mother, so don't underestimate punctuation marks!

3. A letter from a wanderer

A young man went out on business and didn't come home for half a year. His father and mother at home were particularly worried. Finally, one day, parents received a letter from their children. However, after reading, my father is happy and my mother is sad. Do you know what is going on? The original text is as follows:

My son's life is so painful and there is no food, but he is ill and earns a lot of money (no punctuation)

My father reads this letter from home like this:

My son's life is good and there is no pain, but there is more food and less illness and he earns a lot of money.

look again, how does mother read it?

My son's life is so painful! There is no food, and I am sick and earn a lot of money.

4. Some slogans posted on cars. (1) attention to bear infestation (2) correct the violation and stop at any time

5. notice that pedestrians and others are not allowed to urinate here

whenever driving on the highway by car, you can often see a picture stuck behind some cars in front. There is a bear with a big mouth roaring in the picture, which looks terrible. There are several words below-bear infestation. I read with great confidence: "The bear came out and didn't (mei) pay attention." Mom and dad laughed. I read it carefully again in doubt, and I didn't pronounce it wrong! Just ask them why they are laughing. Dad said: "The owner of the car doesn't mean this." No "is a polyphonic word. Reading" mo "here means hiding, which means comparing the car to a bear. Please pay attention when the bear comes out. It is a humorous reminder, and punctuation should be after" No "-bears appear and appear, pay attention!

oh! So that's it. A punctuation mark, a polyphonic word, mispronounced in the wrong place, has a completely different meaning. After this episode, I understand that China culture is profound and has a long history. As a primary school student, you should learn the language well from now on, so that you can apply it freely in your daily life and avoid making jokes.

6.

Once upon a time, there was a rich man who had only one daughter. At the age of 6, he gave birth to another son, named Fei.

The rich man was afraid that all his possessions would be taken away by his son-in-law, so he wrote a suicide note and gave it to his son and son-in-law respectively. The suicide note reads: "A 6-year-old son gives birth to a son, but if it is not my son, he will have to pay all his possessions and fields, and he must not argue with his son-in-law and outsiders.". After the death of the rich man, the son-in-law swallowed the family property, leaving only a small house for the rich man's son. A few years later, the rich man's son grew up and wanted to ask his brother-in-law for his property back. The two men argued and sued the government.

The son-in-law said confidently, "It is clearly written in the father-in-law's suicide note: if a 6-year-old son gives birth to a son, people will say that it is not my son, and the family property will be paid to the son-in-law, and outsiders are not allowed to argue. The county magistrate took the suicide note, scrutinized it carefully, but awarded the property to the rich man's son.

guess what the county magistrate found in the suicide note? It turned out that the county magistrate moved the punctuation mark and guessed the real meaning of the rich man:

"A 6-year-old son is born, and people say' no', it is my son. The family property is paid to the countryside, and the son-in-law is not allowed to argue with outsiders.

7.

Once upon a time, a scholar gave a matchmaker to the son of a rich man's family, and wrote in a letter:

"This woman with pockmarked face, dark hair and white skin is an idiot, regardless of the amount of money ..."

The rich man's family readily agreed. He thinks that "this woman has a pockmarked face, dark hair, white skin, infatuation and innocence, and no matter how much money is paid, it is indispensable ..." Where can such a good condition be found? But the bride who married back turned out to be a pockmarked, black-faced and bald man, so I went to the scholar for theory.

The scholar said, "I wrote it clearly and clearly in my letter:" This woman is pockmarked, hairless, dark-skinned, white and stupid, regardless of pure feelings, and her engagement fee is indispensable. "Word for word! The rich man has a hard time.

8. Zhu Zhishan's couplets (1)

It is said that during Hongzhi period of Ming Dynasty, a rich man's mansion was just completed, and Zhu Zhishan was asked to write couplets. I wish I could write the following:

"This house is safe to live in

Is it sad?".

The rich man blamed Zhu Zhishan for writing him such unlucky words. Zhu Zhishan smiled and said,

"Why do you say this couplet is unlucky? Let me read it to you!

this house is safe and habitable.

he is kind and not sad.

this is great luck!

when the rich man heard this, he felt nauseous.

9. Zhu Zhishan's couplets (II)

It is said that Zhu Zhishan and Nunnery passed by a member's house on New Year's Eve, and suddenly they heard the cry of the baby falling to the ground, so they conveniently wrote on the gate:

"It's really unlucky to have no account to enter the door this year,

It's not a good son and grandson to give birth to a demon last night"

On the first day of New Year's Day, the member opened the door and saw this couplet, < "

shouted unlucky, so he turned to Zhu Zhishan's theory.

Zhu Zhishan said, "You have broken the sentence wrong. You should read it like this:

This year is really good, with no bad luck, money enters the door;

I was born last night. The demon is not. A good son and grandson.

the member turned his anger into joy and quickly set up a wine to thank him.

1. New Year's greetings

Once upon a time, a scholar wrote a New Year's greeting to a farmer. The farmer could not read, so he happily took it back and put it on the lintel. Neighbors came to see that one of them, Zhang San, knew a few words even though he didn't read much, because there was no punctuation in the sentence. After he broke the sentence, the farmer couldn't help but be furious. The congratulatory message was written like this:

"This year is very unlucky, and many people have to go to court.

Piglets are as big as house mice, all dead and clean.

The wine-making vats are good for vinegar, and the jars are sour.

The farmer angrily ran to scold the scholar, and the scholar broke the sentence again, and the farmer turned his anger into joy and went home happily. Its sentence-breaking method:

"Good year, less bad luck, no lawsuit.

The piglets are as big as home, and all the mice are dead.

the wine-making jar is good, which makes the vinegar jar sour.

11. Pedestrians are not allowed to urinate

Policeman: "How can you urinate anywhere?

passer-by: "this is your rule! "patrolman:" nonsense.

passerby: "it says here: pedestrians can't wait, urinate."

patrolman: "nonsense! It should be: pedestrians, etc., no urinating "

12. Who is the champion?

The report of a baseball game wrote:

"As a result of this fierce baseball game,

China defeated Cuba to win the World Cup championship.

The first person looked at it and said that the Chinese team won the baseball game. The newspaper wrote:

"As a result of this fierce baseball game,

the Chinese team defeated the Cuban team and

won the World Cup championship.

The other said, no, it was clearly written in the newspaper:

"As a result of this fierce baseball game,

the Chinese team was defeated and

the Cuban team won the World Cup championship.

13. Women will panic without men

A professor wrote a sentence asking students to write punctuation marks on it.

As a result, all the girls' answers are: "If there are no women, men will panic!

and all the boys' answers are: "If women don't have men, they will panic!

14. Are you sick? Died?

The undertaker of a certain unit was instructed to explain to his superiors why he could not attend an important meeting, and did not punctuate the important words, thus making a joke. The article said, "A certain director of our institute was unable to attend the meeting due to illness ..." The superior was shocked when he received the written complaint.

15. Order food

You can have a dish of vegetables without chicken or duck

What do the guests want?

You can do without chicken and duck or fish, and a dish of green vegetables is enough. (Simple tea and simple rice)

Without chicken, ducks can do it; No fish, meat is ok; A dish of green vegetables is enough. (Package)

16. The Way of University

In the way of university, there is a saying: "Zhi Zhi will decide later, decide later, be quiet, be quiet later, be secure later, be secure later, and be secure later.

Once upon a time, because there were no punctuation marks, there was a private school teacher in Dongcun. He taught his students to read this: "Zhi Zhi will settle down later, then be quiet, then be quiet, then think about it, and then get it. When the teacher read this, he exclaimed, why is there a word "de" missing?

There is also a teacher in Nishimura, who has another teaching method: "Zhi Zhi will have it later, decide it later, be quiet later, be safe later, think about it later, and get it. "He was also surprised to say, how did you get more" De "?

One day, when the teacher in the East Village went to the West Village to find this teacher, he said with an epiphany when he heard him say this.