Make girls laugh.

Make great efforts to govern, do one's best, and be willing to take the world by storm, and be reviled by ten thousand people. One is to exchange experience, and the other is to help the poor.

First, the basic articles. (If you are not a novice, please skip)

1 Like any means of communication, understanding MM is an important part of MM, and if you don't know each other, most people who are crazy about it from the beginning are novices.

2. After reading 1, there is a problem. Many people will ask "How can I understand MM"? Everything has * * * and personality. MM * * vanity, like coquetry, brainless, easily moved. As for personality, the parties need to understand it themselves.

3, a sense of humor is an essential medicine for picking up girls mm.

4.MM has a natural romantic complex, which is the main reason why Korean dramas are popular with MM. 。

Second, intermediate goods.

1, after you have a basic understanding of MM, you should prescribe the right medicine. Then satisfy their vanity, spoil them, touch them and give them romance! I don't know how to do it. Give a simple example: find an opportunity to chat with MM alone and pretend to ask casually: How is your boyfriend? She replied, "I don't have a boyfriend yet! Dear friends, please have the cheek to say, "I don't believe that a beautiful girl like you will have no boyfriend", to praise MM to satisfy her vanity, and to make MM realize the necessity of finding a boyfriend.

As for how to spoil MM, I don't need to teach you this. A hint is to pay attention to details, and several important festivals should not be forgotten.

3. Give MM a romantic feeling and move MM, basically the same. There are too many ways. What I used to do was to buy a red candle, about 5 cm long, and put it in a big heart where we met. If conditions permit, I love you with a glow stick. If the atmosphere is not enough, hold a bunch of roses.

Third, advanced articles

1, with the above foundation, you are no longer a rookie. You can easily win MM's heart. Do you want to further develop your relationship? Then understand the truth of playing hard to get.

2, the so-called playing hard to get is actually psychological tactics. Even if one of MM's puppies is lost, she will still cry for a long time, not to mention a person who can satisfy her vanity, spoil her, give her romance and make her moved.

3. Anyone who is not a pig's head should have been exposed to MM at the intermediate stage. Boys who want XX are not necessarily bad boys, and those who don't want XX are definitely not real boys. (extreme but for motivation)

4. How can we achieve the highest ideal? Let MM put down her psychological defense. MM has the lowest psychological defense in the middle of the night, so you know the best time. MM unconsciously releases her psychological defense in a relaxed and pleasant atmosphere. Choosing a relatively narrow space to bring you closer is "purely accidental"! Late at night, in a relaxed and pleasant atmosphere, in a relatively narrow space, when MM is moved in disorder, it is easy to make irrational behavior. When she woke up, the raw rice was cooked.

Fourth, the last chapter (several suggestions)

1, can't play with MM's feelings.

2. No one will wait for you in the same place for a lifetime.

3, don't take advantage, asshole!

4, don't reply after reading the post, hehe, you know, you won't get MM!

Self-improvement article

The first stage:

1, practice courage. Men who are still single must not have enough courage to face MM, and they are very stiff in front of their favorite MM. They may even forget the lines they have rehearsed many times. It's no use patting their thighs and their mouths after MM leaves. Having enough courage is the basic premise of soaking up MM. If you don't, then all the experiences I said above and what I will say in the future are invalid in front of you. There are thousands of ways to practice bravery. This courage refers to the courage to MM, not the courage to dare to walk alone at night. GG who dares to talk to MM is still relatively few. MM should be regarded as a prey, not an "enemy", not a friend. Remember: there is no MM that can't be soaked, only GG that dares to soak MM.

2, practice poverty. Do you still need to practice loquacious? Of course it is! No one is born with the ability of three aunts and six wives, and it is quite hard to practice this skill. We must aim at those who are poor enough to break up, learn from them, catch up with them and surpass them. As the saying goes, the waves behind the Yangtze River push the waves ahead, and the waves are more intense with each generation. When you meet a Buddha, say Buddha, and when you meet a cat, say cat. It's not as simple as you think. A garrulous mouth needs not only courage, but also shame. The so-called swearing, but the so-called man's face in his pocket. MM's cynicism and the knife hidden in the smile will never make your plan messy. Practice until no one can hit you, and you can start.

3, practice new and practice bad. "Men are not bad, women don't love them." This is the knowledge of almost all cat friends. First of all, you have to be able to smoke, drink and often go to hi! When you see PLMM, say, be my girlfriend. When you see the man around MM (even her 5-year-old brother), you should also ask MM: Your boyfriend? In short, establish a personal image and give people the feeling that you are not a good bird. (It is strongly recommended that people who have a bad grasp do not use it, otherwise the consequences will be at their own risk. )

Bubble MM pays attention to "one courage", "two poverty" and "three little people" It is more important to treat MM "seven points and three points". You have courage, which stinks enough. The reputation of being a bad bird has spread in MM, dear cat brothers, stand up again and get ready to go. You have the courage to be fearless. Isn't it just being close to girls? If you have a bad reputation, don't you have "bad" capital? In case you meet a lady MM, you can also get the effect of death. Imagine: your name is thunderous and "bad" to the extreme, then you don't have to worry about what bad places will be exposed to MM. At this time, if you use your loquacious kung fu to make MM happy, MM will start to find your advantages, and you will find that your advantages are actually quite a lot. After all, you have nothing to expose.

The second stage:

1, half-hearted. Through the first stage of training, I believe that MM can't escape from Wuzhishan. Then raise the height. I've already talked about the principle of playing hard to get, so I'll tell you at arm's length. The so-called indifference is to be cold and hot to MM, and there is a saying that "you love colds and are not afraid that MM can't catch them". At this time MM will chase you back. They often ask, "Do you love me or not?" You don't have to answer. You said to her with a wry smile, "Guess? If she says "love", keep silent. No matter what you think in your heart, you didn't give this answer anyway, so you don't have to worry about being suspected of cheating MM. If she says "no love" and you really love her, then a simple "guess again" will solve the problem. If you are not sure whether you still love her, then you answer "Then you don't like me" (pay special attention, when you say this sentence, you must show that you are angry. ) In general, MM won't ask questions in this case, but in case an expert in MM has written about how to hang a Kai Zi, and she has just studied it, you will need to go through a lot of trouble. (Since this situation is almost zero, it is kept secret for the time being. Forgive me for being selfish for a while, but it's still necessary to save one hand. )

2. Give a lollipop a slap. No matter how NB is, it will always be unpleasant to be with MM. There is absolutely no need for MM to quarrel at this stage. It's normal for young couples to move around, and you are the culprit in destroying love. But after being angry, no matter who is right or wrong, the man must apologize, so as to show your broad mind and make MM love you more. If there is such a MM, she can tolerate all your bad habits, and she will tolerate you, and then tolerate you. So, you can make trouble and make a hullabaloo about for no reason. In short, if there is a fight, you have to fight if you don't create opportunities! Remember: love without suffering will not last long! (not necessarily suitable for everyone)

Give her a moment of silence from time to time. I mentioned it briefly in the primary chapter, because I personally think it is as difficult to master humorous skills as to practice loquacious. Humor is to gently tease people's emotions, just like itching. Itching is a great pleasure in life. Itching will make you feel indescribable comfortable. Some of them are really refreshing and make you scratch unconsciously. So everyone should master humor skills. If you really have no sense of humor, there's nothing you can do but do this.

The third stage:

This is the highest state of MM bubble! However, there are only a few successful practitioners. It is better to learn Sun Tzu's Art of War and Thirty-six Strategies. The highest realm is psychological research: if you are familiar with each other's psychology and know what she is thinking at any time, you can give her psychological hints, psychological induction and psychological inspiration appropriately, so what kind of MM can't do it? However, psychology is not my own major, I am still learning. In order to repay my cat friends, I have made great contributions to provide some information for you. If you want to learn psychology, first look at Freud's psychology-dream interpretation, children's sexual behavior, love and hypnosis. Very meaningful. I have studied his theory for 65,438+0 years and gained a lot. However, I failed to learn their true meaning ~ ~ progress.

(to be continued)

By the way, soaking in MM is not a rigid written thing, you need to experience it yourself. What you have learned is not an example, not the original words, but that kind of ideological realm. My writing ability is limited, so I can't let everyone see it clearly and understand it deeply. But I want to tell you that it is worthwhile to improve this post as much as possible so that more people can learn more skills, even if they are too tired to vomit blood!

There is a big gap between what you think and what you write. In order to tell everyone about my experience of soaking in MM without reservation, so that everyone is no longer lonely, I have tried my best to forget all about eating and sleeping. Everyone is anxious because I know that haste makes waste. At the same time, I hope everyone will give me some encouragement and more courage to walk to the end of this road. At the same time, I hope everyone will give me some criticism. Thank you for your support (bow deeply)!

love story

(This article is for reference only, if there are any omissions, please advise! )

The so-called lover is the lover's saint. Most people will never reach this height, and not everyone can be a lover. As the old saying goes, if heaven wants to do great things among adults, it must first suffer its will, work its bones and muscles, and starve its skins. These so-called hardships are also necessary conditions for achieving a lover. If you want to be a lover, you must have keen eyes, courage and randomness. I have the endurance to walk to the fire on a hot day, but I don't have the determination not to die ... Being a lover requires a lot of preparatory work, and the most important thing is to "forget the feeling of falling in love".

When you can treat a person like a lot (MM) and a lot of people like a person, you will be affectionate and not excessive, and you will be one step closer to your lover. MM wants men to be single-minded to her, so you cats who want to be lovers, show sincerity and be single-minded to every girl. When you are with A, don't think about B. When you are with B, forget about C. When you are with C, you can only think about D.. When ABCD is not here, forget it and go to E ("not here" means invisible). If ABCDE is easy to meet in different occasions at the same time, you should make good preparations first. Let ABCDE know that your concept is neutral, so that you can hug with 5 MM (if you can abduct your arms), and MM will not be jealous, and so on.

Re-emphasize the importance of psychology. Even if you haven't studied, I believe you probably know something about psychology. For example, when a girl says she is cold, you hug her. If you dare not sleep alone, it means that you slept with her. If you can't even hear these explicit hints, please stop reading them, because they are too profound for you, or in your words, too incredible. The lover can not only hear the implication in MM's words, but also read the unique body language of each MM, and make a detailed analysis of MM's movements and expressions on her face. Speculate MM's psychological activity. All these require careful observation by practitioners, because people can only lie in words. Facial expressions and habitual movements are closely related to MM's psychological activities. It must be remembered that much talk will be lost.

Chimpanzees accidentally stepped on a bench pulled by a gibbon. After the gibbon cleaned it gently and carefully, they fell in love. People ask how they are together. Chimpanzees said with emotion: ape dung! It's all ape shit!

2. I said, "You are a pig." You said, "I am a pig!" " From now on, I will call you a pig. Finally one day, you can't help yelling at me in front of everyone: "I'm not a pig!" " "

Tomorrow, when you wake up, there is a mosquito lying on your pillow, and there is a suicide note beside you, which reads: I struggled all night, but I couldn't pierce your face. You are so cheeky, I have no face to live in this world! Lord ~ forgive him! I killed myself.

4. One day, a fly mother and son had lunch together.

The son asked the mother fly, why do we eat shit every day?

Mother fly said angrily, don't say such disgusting things when eating, eat while it's hot! !

A college student was caught by the enemy. The enemy tied him to a telephone pole and asked him, where are you from? I'll electrocute you if you don't tell me! The college student replied to the enemy's words and was electrocuted. He said, I'm from TV University!

6. Two charming children got married. After seeing off the guests, the groom returned to the bedroom and found a meatball lying on the bed! The groom was frightened and asked where the bride was. Meatball said shyly, I hate it, you don't even know people when they take off their clothes!

7. Four mice brag: A: I eat rat poison as candy every day; B: it itches if you don't step on a mouse for a day; C: Don't go to the streets several times a day. D: it's getting late. Let's go home and hug the cat.

8. One night, a naked man called a taxi and the female driver stared at him. The naked man was furious and shouted: You have never seen a naked man! The female driver was also furious: I see where the fuck you lost!

9. Do you have a TV over there? Now, take a quick look at the murdered central Zhao Benshan. Pol.ice blocked the northeast, 19 died, 1 65,438+0 disappeared,1fooled!

10. A drunk accidentally fell from the third floor, attracting passers-by, and a policeman came over: What's the matter? Drunk: I don't know. I just got here, too.

1 1. A shy boy finally got up the courage to ask his beloved girl: What kind of boy do you like? The girl said: hit it off. The boy asked the same question again and had to say sadly, can't you have a flat head?

12. Wolf cubs are born vegetarians. Mother wolf and father wolf racked their brains to train wolf cubs to hunt. Finally, Sirius's parents were happy to see their son chasing rabbits. The wolf cub grabbed the rabbit's fierce face and said, boy! Hand over the carrots!

13. In front of the counter of Lamian Noodles Store, a beautiful girl is waiting in line. When she arrived, Master Lamian Noodles asked, Do you want a thick one or a thin one? Girl: I'll eat whatever you pull.

14. A man and a woman had an affair and her husband suddenly came home. The man jumped out of the window and ran away, naked, walking in the street to watch. The man pretended to look at the sky as if nothing had happened: Ah, this is the earth. Passers-by said: Cao, an alien with chicken feathers.

15. The white rabbit Q B ran after the big wolf, and the big wolf was indignant and chased after him. The rabbit dressed up as a gray rabbit and read the newspaper with glasses. The wolf asked, can you see a white rabbit? Rabbit: Is it the wolf's little white rabbit? Wolf shame: I'm KAO, so soon?

16. Chief: Hello, comrades! Soldier: Hello, sir! Chief: comrades are all tanned! Soldier: The leader is blacker! The chief patted a soldier's chest and said, how well this muscle is trained! Soldier: Sir, I'm a female soldier.

17. I saw a penny on the side of the road, and I was about to bend down to pick it up. It turned out to be phlegm. Damn it, who threw up so round?

18. When the nurse saw a patient drinking in the ward, she went over and whispered to him, "Sweetheart!" The patient smiled and said, "Little baby."

19. The miser was on a business trip. He was afraid that others would steal the wine he just ordered, so he wrote on a piece of paper: I spit in the cup. After a while, he came back and found a few more words on the note: I vomited too!

20. Someone rode into the street, crossed an intersection and spread his hands. The traffic police exclaimed after seeing it: "Good palm!" Someone waved happily and replied, "Comrades have worked hard!" "

2 1. The teacher asked the physical education committee to make sure that all the girls in the class were here, so he said to him, "Go and clean up all the girls in the class." The Sports Commission was a little goat and asked, "Which one?" The teacher said, "I know I want you to go!" " "

22. In junior high school math class, the teacher talked about equation transformation. He rolled his sleeves on the podium and shouted: Attention, students! I'm going to change! ……