Ask for 20 funny jokes.

1. I remember the first teacher who died for me.

At that time, I was in the first grade of primary school, and my teacher took us to the wild for a natural practice class. Seeing the spring breeze blowing green and the willows sprouting branches, the teacher couldn't help thinking of a question, so he asked, "Students, do you know how to tell the wind direction?" "I know!" A little girl in my class replied, picking up a leaf from the ground and throwing it into the air. "Pick up something and throw it into the air and watch it float there." "Well, that's good." The teacher praised, "Who else would like to show you again and see what wind is blowing now?"

"me!" I volunteered, picked up half a brick from the ground and threw it into the air ... "Teacher, it's blowing up and down now!" " ..... I can't remember clearly what the teacher's expression was like at that time. I only remember that he struggled a few times and then died. Later, according to the hospital doctor, he died because of sudden strong stimulation, which led to retrograde qi and blood. In this way, I killed a people's teacher

The first grade teacher taught us poultry and animals.

Teacher: "There is an animal with two feet. Every morning when the sun comes out, it will wake you up and wake you up. What animal is it? " I replied, "Mom!" Laughing so hard that the teacher almost died!

When I got home from the mid-term exam, my mother asked me how I did in the exam. My baby son said that I didn't fill in any questions. Mom asked what this question was, and my baby son said, this is a question about how much you get by multiplying 3 by 7. I don't care. I filled in 15. My mother sprayed the water she just drank on my father's face. Hey ... I'm great!

One day in math class, the teacher asked 1+ 1=? , I said I don't know. The teacher asked me to ask. I asked my mother who was cooking to let me out. I asked my father who was watching the ball, and he shouted' cool'. I asked my sister, and she sang until the baby. I asked my brother, and he said on the phone, I will wait for you outside.

The next day, the teacher asked 1+ 1=? I said: get out of here, the teacher slapped me, I shouted cool, the teacher called me useless, I said mean, and the teacher said get out! I said, I'll wait for you outside. Our math teacher suffered from hypertension again on the spot and fainted. .....

When I was in Chinese class in primary school, all the Chinese teachers in the school attended Teacher Ni's class. Teacher Ni wrote a word "Bei" on the blackboard and asked me, "Do you know this word?" I answered "no" and Teacher Ni began to enlighten me: "Do you have a bed at home?" I answered "Yes" and "What's on the bed?" "Summer sleeping mat" "Where is the summer sleeping mat?" I replied, "My mother", and Teacher Ni thought, this is also true. My mother was covered with a quilt, and then I was inspired: "What about your mother?" "My dad". Teacher Ni didn't expect me to say this. She made a fool of herself in front of so many teachers and asked anxiously, "What about the quilt?" I replied, "The quilt is on the ground!" Teacher Ni was taken away, and I was so angry that I was hospitalized with lamb disease!

Later, the new teacher at school asked us to make sentences. I finished my homework calmly, and the teacher looked at me with new eyes. The sentence I wrote is: I'm sorry-the ditch in front of our house is very sad. If canned food is not as nutritious as fruit juice. Naive-it's really hot today. This is a good day for swimming. Ten points-it's a pity that my sister only got ten points in the math exam. Relax, I always start with simple things. Ginseng-the teacher said that we should take part in the relay of the brigade tomorrow, so we must do our best. Quilt-Xiaoyu's sanitary quilt was stolen. Lunch-Xiaoming takes defecation as the first thing when he gets up every morning. The teacher was killed on the spot. ......

I said to myself, "I am very creative. Ugliness is not my intention. Don't lose your temper I will live bravely and set off the beauty of the world! " ! ! ! ! In the days that followed, several teachers suffered misfortune one after another. Fortunately, no one died and there was no big leak. But my fame spread like wildfire and I became a celebrity in the city for a time. However, celebrities also have the pain of celebrities, and I deeply realized this.