Interesting text message

1 Buried in the ground 1000 years old wine, what is it called after it comes out?

Answer: alcohol.

There is a pig. He walked and walked and came to England. What has he become?

Answer: pig

In class, the teacher recited the text at will. Piggy, puppy and kitten all raised their hands. Who will the teacher call?

Answer: Puppy, because Wangwang is humble.

Butterflies, ants, spiders, centipedes, they work together, which one didn't get paid in the end?

Answer: centipede, because it won't spend money in vain.

The elephant's nose is the longest in the zoo. Who is the second longest?

Answer: Elephant.

6 What kind of fruit has the worst eyesight?

Answer: mango.

7 Which two kinds of vegetables have mobile phones?

Answer: Radish and vegetables have their own tastes.

A turtle walked through a pile of dog shit, but left only three footprints on it. Why?

Answer: Hold your nose with one foot.

Why did nine people go to bed to sleep?

Answer: The bed won't come by itself.

10 is actually 800 Spartans. Why did it become 300 in the movie?

Answer: Wu Bai went to sing.

Why can Xiao Qiang park with one hand?

A: Take a taxi.

12 If there is a car, the driver is a prince and the passenger is a princess, whose car is it?

Answer: If so.

13 whose leg is longer in Jin Mu?

Answer: ham sausage

1 Who will suddenly get old in the world?

Answer: the bride. Because today is the bride, tomorrow is the wife.

How much is a heart worth?

Answer: 1 100 million. Because of singleness!

How much do I need to bring when I go out in typhoon weather?

Answer: 40 million. Don't go out because there is nothing to do in typhoon weather.

The exam is coming. What books can't I read?

Answer: Encyclopedia (throw away all encyclopedias).

If tomorrow is the end of the world, why do people want to commit suicide today?

[Answer] Have a place in heaven

Question 6: What are cloth and paper afraid of?

A: cloth is afraid of 10 thousand, paper is afraid of one thousand.

Reason: not (cloth) afraid of 10 thousand, just (paper) afraid of one thousand.

Question 7: What is the pencil surname?

A: Xiao.

Reason: Sharpen.

Question 8: What will Kirin become when it reaches the North Pole?

Answer: ice cream.

Reason: ice cream (ice unicorn).

Question 9: From 1 to 9, which number is the most diligent and which number is the laziest?

Answer: 1 lazy; 2 Diligence

Reason: One (1) does not do two (2) endlessly.

10 Question: How to make sparrows quiet?

Answer: Click.

Reason: silence.

1 1 Question: Who runs fastest in history?

Answer: Cao Cao

Reason: Speak of the devil.

12 question: 30-50 which number is worse than bear shit!

Answer: 40

Reason: Facts speak louder than words.

13 question: what should I do if the pigs in the pigsty run out?

Answer: Wang Leehom.

Reason: to coax.

14 Question: What if I come out again?

The answer is: Han Hong.

Reason: Still coax.

September 28th of 15 is Confucius' birthday, so when is June 28th of 10?

Answer: Confucius full moon

16 the wolf is coming (guess)?

Answer: carambola (sheep escape)

17 what would the world be like if Chiang Kai-shek were still alive?

Answer: There is another person. ...

18 There are carp under these two pieces of ice (four-word idiom)?

Answer: Be polite (there are carp in the ice).

19 why does tofu hurt people?

Answer: Because it is frozen tofu.

A bus had an accident and everyone was injured. Why is Xiaoming okay?

A: Because he is not in the car.

2 1 There is a place where you can get in but not out. What is this place?

Answer: the grave

Chickens and geese compete in the 100 meter race. Chickens run faster than geese. Why did you arrive at the terminal later?

Answer: The chicken ran in the wrong direction.

The bell in the east rang, but there was no one in the classroom. What happened?

Answer: physical education class.

Lingling has never studied arithmetic, but the teacher praised her math as one of the best. Why?

Answer: Count from one to two.

What did Columbus do immediately after he set foot on the New World?

Answer: Take the other foot.

Some people say that eating fish can avoid myopia. Why?

Answer: Have you ever seen a cat wear eyes?

What has no tongue in its mouth?

Answer: teapot mouth

What kind of official doesn't give orders, but always smiles at others?

Answer: the groom's view

A policeman ran away when he saw the thief. Why?

Answer: I want to catch the thief quickly.

Xiaoming eats gum every day, but others still say he has bad breath. Why?

Answer: He swears every day.

Why can frogs jump higher than trees?

Answer: because trees can't jump

"You are standing with a pig", guess an animal.

Answer: I like it (like it)

Pharaoh has to shave forty or fifty times a day, but he still has a beard on his face. What is the reason?

Answer: Lao Wang is a barber.

What flowers can't be touched

Answer: Spark

What can solve all the mysteries?

Answer: the answer

When will the clock in Times Square ring 13?

Answer: Fix it when it is time to fix it.

In ancient times, who became a father-in-law before becoming a father?

Answer: eunuch

When someone knocks at the door, you will never say come in.

A: When going to the toilet.

Black chicken or white chicken? Why?

Answer: Black chickens are powerful and can lay white eggs, but white chickens can't lay black eggs.

Why does everyone like to sit and watch movies?

Answer: Because it hurts to stand and watch your feet.

4 1 What will be the impact of canceling morning self-study?

Answer: Sleep less for half an hour.

Please invite the tortoise and rabbit to race and the pig to be the referee. Who will win the game?

Answer: I can't say! The person mentioned is a pig …

What are the similarities between what two women said and what a thousand ducks said?

Answer: Nonsense (chicken)

There is a pig and a donkey in the farmer's house. Do you think farmers should kill pigs or donkeys first during the Chinese New Year?

Answer: Would you rather kill a pig (silly pig) or a donkey (donkey)?

Why didn't the plane hit the stars when it flew so high?

Answer: Because the stars will "flash"

One day, a medium-rare steak was walking in the street. Suddenly he saw a medium-rare steak in front of him, but he ignored him. Why don't they say hello?

Answer: Because they are not familiar with it.

1 Who is the king of beasts? ● Zoo director

What kind of person will appear after death? ● The characters in the movie

What hat can't I wear? ● Nut

What books are not available in the bookstore? ● suicide note

What is the elephant's left ear like? ● Right ear

What water will never be used up? ● Tears

What has five heads, but people don't find it strange? ● Hands and feet

The family asked the doctor about the patient's condition. The doctor only raised five fingers, and the whole family cried. What is the reason? ● Three long and two short.

Put a chicken and a goose on the iceberg at the same time. Why is the chicken dead and the goose not dead? ● Goose is penguin.

10 What English letters do people like to listen to best? ● CD

1 1 What is the secret of longevity? Keep breathing, don't die.

12 The angrier, the bigger the thing. ● Temper

13 What are the flowers that bloom all the year round? ● Plastic flowers

14 Why does Chang 'e like living on the moon? Chang 'e loves rabbit meat.

15 Where is the narrowest road? The road to go is very narrow.

/kloc-what's the name of farting before 0/6? ● Unique voice

17 when someone knocks at the door, you will never say come in? ● In the toilet.

18 which is the smallest island in the world? ● Safety island on the road

19 where is the safest place when the earth explodes? ● Hell

A group of men who are afraid of their wives are getting together to discuss how to revive men's glory. Suddenly, they heard that their wives were coming, and everyone fled everywhere, but none of them ran away. Why? Low frighten fainted.

2 1 What's in the middle of the Pacific Ocean? ● It is a flat role.

What word is universal? ● Arabic numerals

A child and an adult are walking in the dark night. The child is the son of an adult, but the adult is not the father of the child. Why? ● Because they are mother-child relationship.

Two fathers and sons went to buy hats. Why did they only buy three hats? Grandpa, Dad and Son

Why can't a hammer hammer eggs? Of course, the hammer won't break.

A man was chased by a tiger and suddenly a big river appeared in front of him. He can't swim, but he passed. Why? ● Faint.

What easily knocked down the 27th World Boxing Champion? ● Sleep.

There was a lady who had been divorced several times and played a four-word idiom? ● Exhausted (abandoned) former civil servants (jobs)

What do stutterers lose the most? ● Make long-distance calls.

What did Columbus do immediately after he set foot on the New World? Step on the other foot.

3 1 Is "kiss" a verb, adjective or noun? ● Conjunction

After the failure of heart exchange surgery, the doctor asked the dying patient what his last words were. Guess what he would say? In fact, you don't understand my heart.

Why do men have to fight when drinking together? ● Don't suffer.

34 Divide 8 in half, what is it? ●0

When does the sun rise in the west? When swearing.

There is a newborn baby. Two children were born on the same day of the same year and the same month. Their parents are the same, but they are not twins. Is this possible? Maybe, they are triplets.

What is the first thing everyone should do when they wake up in the morning? ● Open your eyes

A new hospital has been opened in this city, with advanced equipment and thoughtful service. But the strange thing is: there are no patients here. Why? This is a veterinary hospital.

In winter, how can we immediately turn ice into water without heating? ● Remove two points of ice.

A hungry cat walked past a fat mouse. Why did the hungry old cat leave without looking at the mouse? A blind cat meets a dead mouse.

4 1 Why do peacocks fly southeast instead of northwest? Because there are high walls in the northwest.

A truck driver collided with a motorcyclist. The truck driver was seriously injured, but the motorcyclist was fine. Why? ● The truck driver was not driving at that time.

Xiaoming's mother has three sons. The eldest son is Daming, the second is Erming, and what are the names of the third son? Xiao Ming, of course.

There is a young man who wants to do business in the river. However, there are no boats or bridges in this river. So he swam across the river in the morning, and it only took him an hour to swim to the other side. In the afternoon, the width and velocity of the river did not change. More importantly, his swimming speed did not change, but it took him two and a half hours to swim to the other side. Why do you think it is? Two and a half hours add up to an hour.

There is a big ship at sea. Its initial capacity is 60 people. As a result, when it reached the 59th person, it actually sank into the sea! That's why (there are no pregnant and overweight people on board; There is no weight on board? Relax, this is a submarine.

What is unknown, you don't know and I know? ● The sole is broken.

There are two people, one facing south and the other facing north. They are not allowed to look back, walk or look in the mirror. Can they see each other's faces? Of course, they stood face to face.

What kind of eggs cannot be broken, boiled or eaten? ● The test score is zero "0"

Which is more painful, coconut or watermelon? I have a headache.

What is the difference between Confucius and Mencius? ● Confucius' son is on the left. Mencius' son is on it.

5 1 What can I borrow without returning it? ● Excuse me.

When you entered the zoo, what was the first animal you saw? ● Conductor

What can't a magnifying glass enlarge? ● Angle

What will increase by half after handstand? ●6

You will destroy it by calling its name. What is this? ● Silence

What comes often, but never really comes? ● Tomorrow

When Xiao Wang and his parents traveled abroad for the first time, their parents seemed at a loss because of the language barrier. Xiao Wang doesn't know any foreign languages and he is not deaf, but he has never felt any inconvenience like in his own country. Why? Xiao Wang is a baby.

How do I write the scarlet letter with a blue pen? Write a "red"

When the car turns right, which tire does not turn? ● Spare tire

There is a natural black marble. What will happen if you throw it into Qiantang River on September 7th? ● Sink into the river bottom

6 1 Under what circumstances will people burst into tears? ● Cremation

Foxes are best at confusing men, so which "fine" men and women are fascinated together? ● Alcohol

Why did a healthy couple give birth to a baby without eyes? ● Chickens lay eggs

Why do two tigers have to fight to the death before giving up? No one dares to stop fighting.

Mr. Lin changed an artificial heart after major surgery. After she recovered, her girlfriend broke up immediately. Why? Don't really love her.

You can do it, I can do it, everyone can do it; One person can do it, but two people can't do it together What is this for? ● Dreaming

Is black-bone chicken more powerful or white chicken more powerful? Why? ● Black-bone chicken, black-bone chicken can lay white eggs, and white chicken can't lay black eggs.

When you come home in the middle of the night, only to find that you forgot your key and there is no one else at home, what is your biggest wish? I forgot to lock the door.

What are the benefits of black hair? ● Not afraid of tanning

If tomorrow is the end of the world, why do people want to commit suicide today? ● Find a seat in heaven.

7 1 The manager can't cook, but there is one dish that he is particularly good at. What is this? ● Fried squid.

What wine can't be drunk? ● Iodine

Why is a bottle of medicine marked highly toxic harmless to people? As long as you don't drink it.

You don't need to work hard at typing. ● doze off

Some things are known to both buyers and sellers, but only users don't know. What is this? ● Coffin

Some people say that a woman is like a book, so what book is a fat woman like? ● bound volume

What's the difference between being bitten by a crocodile and being bitten by a shark? Nobody knows.

A cow, go north 10 m, go west 10 m, go south 10 m, turn right and ask where the cow's tail faces. ● Facing the ground

"Innate" refers to the inheritance of parents, so what is "acquired"? the day after tomorrow

What are the main reasons for divorce? ● Get married

8 1 9 oranges were distributed to 13 children. How to distribute them fairly? Squeeze into juice

How to put a pencil on the ground so that no one can cross it? Low on the wall.

Why does the Statue of Liberty always stop at new york Harbor? She can't sit.

Why can frogs jump higher than trees? ● Trees can't jump

Is there anything in the world that can carry people at a speed of nearly 2000 km/h without refueling or other fuels? ● Earth

What do you call a beautiful woman who doesn't have children after marriage and is afraid of losing her figure? A beautiful woman

Why do blacks like to eat white chocolate? ● Afraid of eating fingers.

88 Who is always afraid to take a bath ● Clay figurine

Why are Buddhists mostly in the northern hemisphere? Low south "no" amitabha.

Stealing is not illegal. ● Sneak

9 1 Do you know where modern scientists are usually born? ● In the hospital

Why do geese fly south? Because walking with your feet is too slow.

Winter melon, cucumber, watermelon and pumpkin can all be eaten, but what melon can't be eaten? ● Fool

There are 6 steamed buns in 94 pots, which are given to 6 children each 1, but there is still 1 in the pot. Why? ● The last child takes the basin together.

Pharaoh has to shave forty or fifty times a day, but he still has a beard. What is the reason? Lao Wang is a barber.

There is a word that everyone will mispronounce when they see it. What is this word? This is the word "error"

97 what car can't move? ● Windmill

Xiaoming never studied but got a model student. Why is Xiaoming a deaf-mute student?

How many sides does a box have? ● Two sides. internally and externally

100 which month has 28 days? ● There are 28 days in each month.