Pit friend chat routine

Chatting with friends has skills and routines. With the rapid development of the Internet, people now prefer to make friends online rather than face-to-face communication. This phenomenon has spawned many chat softwares, and there are more online chat routines. Let's take a look at the chat routines of our friends.

Pit friends chat routines 1 chat classics lie and set classics.

1. Superman's briefs are very stable, which is why he flies so high.

My dream is to daydream in my dream.

Donor, if you bully the poor monk, he will lose face to God.

4. Myopia, from a distance, you are a beautiful woman, so you can see that you are a female diaosi.

Don't push me, or I'll get out of hand.

6. Don't think that just because you look like a wolf, I can treat you as a big pervert.

7. The sky is falling, you hold it first, and I'll find the stick.

8. Men and women quarrel. Men are like guns and women are like machine guns.

9. Do you know what it feels like for a wolf to fall in love with a sheep? That's just to eat its meat.

10. This morning in spring, I woke up carefree, yawned at home, couldn't sleep at night, and couldn't wake up during the day.

1 1. In fact, you have an advantage. Ghosts dare not run to your house at night.

12. I'm in a bad mood now, and I can't do anything but eat.

13. If the exam can be upgraded, I'm afraid I still have a negative score.

14. Every night, I feel buried.

15. People think I'm meditating, but I'm actually looking at whether a hair on the ground should be picked up.

16. Life is too short to be sexy or understand the hard life.

Routine Q&A set of hot articles.

1, don't move Quiet. Look at this message! Look up, look down, don't forget the left and right! Have you finished reading it? Delete it after reading it!

2. What happened? Call the mobile phone, voice prompt: you dialed a lazy pig from other places, please dial the pigsty area code before dialing the number. I can't believe it. Call again. Voice prompt: the owner has been slaughtered.

The most romantic thing I can think of is watching you get fat. Then I'll eat pork. Oh yeah!

It is reasonable to hear that eating garlic can prevent swine flu. Think about it: if you eat garlic, people will think you stink and don't want to be near you, and the swine flu virus won't be around! Haha, don't forget to pack two cloves of garlic before you go out!

Meeting you is the beginning of my heart, and falling in love with you is my happy choice; Pursuing you is the starting point of my happiness; Having you is my most precious wealth; Stepping on the red carpet is my eternal motivation! Unfortunately, I sent it to the wrong person!

6. Are your ears itchy? Does that mean I miss you and my eyes itch? Does this mean that I want to see you? Does your mouth itch? That means I want to kiss you. Does it itch? That means ... stop joking. You have lice. Take a bath!

7. I have three sentences to tell you, including the following one. Thank you for finishing.

8. "I miss those days. You wriggled in front of me and walked down the country road with your head down. When the villagers saw us, they all praised you: hey, beautiful and clean! Also praised me: What a good child, such a small grade came out to put pigs! "

9. If your ears itch, it proves that someone misses you; Your eyes itch, which proves that someone wants to see you; Your itchy lips prove that someone wants to kiss you; If you don't feel well ... stop dreaming, it's time to take a shower!

Pit friends chat routines 2 all kinds of deceptive routines dialogue.

1. The Zen master poured a can of gasoline on Xiaoming, then struck a match, and the flame was close to Xiaoming's face. Q: "What do you realize?" . Xiao Ming: "Will you die if you don't blow?" . Then the Zen master took off his pants ... you know!

Yesterday at home, my addiction broke out again, and I couldn't even eat. The whole person's body is shaking, tears and nose are flowing out, thinking that this is terrible, and there is no money and no salary. I made up a lie and borrowed 3000 yuan from my friend. I turned on the computer and brushed six Ferrari sports cars for the female anchor Shrimp. When I heard the words "thank you for kissing", suddenly the whole person relaxed!

3. Playing a big adventure in KTV, a friend got lost. I said to dig out all the pitaya seeds in the fruit bowl and put them on the plate. Then he dug for more than an hour ... let's play again, and then another friend lost. I said I was planting seeds! Almost got killed.

4. One day, two local tyrants were walking in the street, and when they were walking, they met a piece of shit, said local tyrant A; You eat this shit, I'll give you 20 million. Tuhao B ate it after listening, and Tuhao A gave it 20 million as agreed. It wasn't long before I met another shit, local tyrant B said; You eat this, I'll give you 20 million. I heard that local tyrant A also ate it. Local tyrant B also gives you 20 million. So, what did they get?

5. I slept soundly during my lunch break, and suddenly I heard someone shout, Dad, I want to go out to play, go out to play, and I said I would go to bed when it was hot at noon. Alas, I finally got up and pulled a tube.

6. A friend's house was a guest, and his friend insisted on killing chickens, saying that it was his business to kill chickens on holidays. Look at him holding a knife in his hand and grabbing the chicken's neck! Ten minutes passed, and the chicken was strangled alive. Then I returned the 2000 yuan I lent him years ago.

7. A buddy pretended to be dead when he met a beautiful woman in a white coat. Dude: Doctor, do you think I can be saved if I am so ill?

Doctor: But I'm a vet. Dude: Never mind! I am an animal.

It is said that bungee jumping is very exciting, so I will go bungee jumping with my wife today. Unexpectedly, she regretted it when she got on the high platform and didn't want to jump. I was angry: "I have spent all my money. How can I not jump?" Then I pushed her down, and then I looked at the rope in the hand of the security officer next to me and asked, "What is this for?"

Make friends and chat routine 3 1, I can make you forget that you are a pig. I am not a pig. Look, forget it.

Are you a pig? I am not a pig!

Do you have a good memory? How much is one plus one? How much is one plus two? What's the first question I asked you?

Let me tell you a story. A tortoise went to the Dragon King for a job. The Dragon King said that you must weigh 100 kg, but said that the tortoise was only 99 kg. Then the tortoise went back and met two shrimps. The tortoise told the shrimp to hide in its ear, and then weighed it exactly 100 kg.

The dragon king asked the tortoise, why did he gain a kilo at once? At this moment, two shrimps appeared. The dragon king asked what was going on in your ear. The shrimps said, I am telling a story to the tortoise.

If there is a car with ten cows and twenty sheep, whose car is it? Yes, if.

6. Once upon a time, there was a chicken with a pig in front, a cow on the left and a donkey on the right. What's behind it? It's from, because there is a chicken in front of "from"

7. Giddens Ko took one. How much is left? Eight. Dad's here!

8. How to make a pig say "I don't know"? I don't know

9. What animal loves to ask why? It is a pig. Why?

10, there are four people playing mahjong in the room. The police came and four people ran away, but why did the police catch another person in the room? Because the person who was beaten was called mahjong.