Dragon Boat Festival jokes make you happy.

The Dragon Boat Festival jokes make you happy to bursting

Jokes are an artistically processed language form, which is an artistic language. The following are the Dragon Boat Festival jokes I collected for you, which make you happy to bursting. If you like, you can pay attention to the classic quotations column.

1. Zongzi and Baozi are pregnant, and their children are so beautiful.

Steamed Bun: Look at our posture, we will definitely have a big fat boy.

Zongzi: Come on, with your thick skin, it will be small and dark. Look at our thin skin and big stuffing,

born white and watery

2. The Dragon Boat Festival Cup football match is about to start, with steamed buns and steamed buns watching.

Commentary: Zongzi United is wearing a green shirt and 6 Eggs is wearing a white shirt. Welcome everyone to participate in the short message quiz, bla ~ bla ...

Steamed Bun: No need to guess, Zongzi United will win.

steamed bread: why?

steamed stuffed bun: people have rice.

3. Rice goes to the steamed stuffed bun to play, and the steamed stuffed bun invites rice to watch the performance. Steamed bread, sugar bag, meat bag, vegetable bag and bean paste bag are on stage in turn. Rice regrets that you girls here are really tough! After a while, Zongzi came on the stage, and the rice shone at the moment. Zongzi was good! Zongzi took off his coat and threw it under the stage, and the audience screamed. When rice is happy, it is a classic, or my hometown!

4. Everyone watched the dragon boat race, and steamed dumplings was squeezed into the water. Zongzi jumped into the rescue without thinking about taking off his clothes, and as a result, he went straight down. Both of them were rescued by glutinous rice balls. Tangyuan scolded Zongzi, and your head was soaked in lime water, so you wouldn't die if you saw someone wearing a skirt.

5. Rice and steamed buns were in a group fight, and rice was beaten when many people saw anyone who looked like steamed buns, and all of them, including steamed buns, jiaozi and Tangyuan, were spared. < P > A Zongzi was forced into a corner, and in a hurry it took off its clothes and shouted: I am undercover ...

6. That night.

A group of zongzi were driven to the corner, and

they were so flat that they broke their heads.

All the dumplings were tired, and only then did they hear one of them shout:

? Brothers, stop fighting, one of our own,

I am the one who was expelled from the shop because of mildew.

　7。 Excited zongzi accidentally tore his shirt, revealing the red dates wrapped inside, and the rice people were furious. You fucking do infernal affairs! ?

Dragon Boat Festival SMS joke

1. The wormwood leaves are full of incense, and the peach branches are inserted by the door. The palm leaves are green at close range, and the wheat is yellow at a distance.

2. Your mobile phone has the function of buying zongzi from now on. Please dial 11 for reservation and deliver it to 119. If you have any questions, please contact our center at the website: Who will pit you? Happy Dragon Boat Festival!

3. Race the dragon boat on the Miluo River, and strive for the upper reaches. Since ancient times, there is no shortcut to success.

4. Good news: On the Dragon Boat Festival, mobile phone users of China Mobile, who have the first two digits of 13, can collect zongzi free of charge from street stalls. Of course, they should put on scald cream in advance to avoid being spilled by the stall owner's boiling water.

5. Zongzi should be thrown into the sea, because your mind is as broad as the sea. Don't forget to throw yourself a Zongzi! Happy Dragon Boat Festival!

6. Zongzi is delicious, but be careful; Food processing makes people vomit; It depends on the proof that Qu Yuan was poisoned in this way!

7. In memory of the great poet Qu Yuan, we should eat more zongzi, although those zongzi should be thrown into the river.

8. Qian Shan? Zongzi? It's love, Qu Yuan said thank you, watching the Dragon Boat Festival in unison, and family ties are not far away

9. The Dragon Boat Festival is coming, and I'll give you a zongzi, in which friendship is the skin, the first layer is blessing, the second layer is happiness, and the third layer is all you want. By the way, the fourth layer is of course the iou you wrote, so pay me back quickly!

1. There is a saying that has been hidden in my heart for a long time, and I really want to say it to you, but I am afraid that even ordinary friends will not be able to do it. Until tonight, I finally got up the courage to say to you: I, I want to eat the zongzi you wrapped! Be loving!

11. I am a palm leaf and you are rice, wrapping you layer by layer; You are the tooth and I am the rice, and the fragrance sticks to you sweetly; How many meters are there in the palm, which means how much I miss you. Remember to send me a message, or brown son will choke you to death!

12. Zongzi is fragrant and fragrant in the kitchen; Artemisia argyi, full of fragrance; Peach branches are inserted in the gate, and when you go out, you can see the wheat is yellow; It's sunny here, sunny there, and sunny everywhere. Wish my dear friends a happy Dragon Boat Festival!

13. If you miss your heart for a long time, it will be artificial to fold the bamboo in half, so you have to wait for the spoon, and you will steal a piece of your heart. In order to wait for life and death, you will forget about it at two o'clock, and you will have ten hearts on your body, so you will find endless grass.

14. On your birthday, I will send you a cake; On the Mid-Autumn Festival, I will send you a box of moon cakes. When the Dragon Boat Festival comes, I will send you a glutinous rice. I hope you will plant it, take good care of it and wait for my blessing.

15. Everyone praises you for being quick and eager to learn, and you are like what you learn. I remember that day when you learned to sing from Andy Lau, it was really like you. Dragon Boat Festival is coming. I think you should imitate Qu Yuan's suicide by jumping into the river, too. How about that?

16. Send a sachet with a purse, make a few kilograms of zongzi, ask someone to pick mugwort leaves in the mountains, buy a bottle of realgar wine on the street, and give it to you as a gift with a little care from the bottom of my heart. I wish you a happy Dragon Boat Festival!

17. You know what I think? Miss you. Do you know why I miss you? Because I like it. Do you know why I like you? Because of your smell. Do you know why it smells? Because you are zongzi, I wish you a happy Dragon Boat Festival in advance!

18. A heart hangs on you, a love blesses you, and a true feeling is waiting for your response. Happy Dragon Boat Festival!

19. In May Festival, the dragon boat is grilled, the dragon drum is ringing, and the river is near, hehe, can you see the dragon boat race there? Wish you a happy Dragon Boat Festival!

2. When the Dragon Boat Festival arrives, don't forget to hang mugwort leaves, hang Zhong Kui, drink yellow wine and wear sachets. Of course, the most important thing is to eat more palm seeds, hehe!

21. On the Dragon Boat Festival, every household hangs up the statue of Zhong Kui, and hangs up the wormwood calamus, dragon boat races, eating zongzi, drinking realgar wine, swimming in all diseases, wearing sachets and preparing sacrifices. It's fun to make a scene.

22. Dragon Boat Festival on the fifth day of May; Realgar shochu calamus sword; Triangle palm wrapped in glutinous rice, colorful sachets hanging on the chest. Happy Dragon Boat Festival!

23. May 5th is the Dragon Boat Festival. Eat zongzi and watch dragon boats. Let's get together and celebrate the festival. Wish you a happy holiday!

24. Smell the fragrance of zongzi, and think of you in the distance. Are you well? Let's eat more zongzi thanks to the great poet!

cross the sun happily!

25. wormwood leaves are fragrant and full of fragrance. Peach branches are inserted in the gate, and when you go out, you can see that the wheat is yellow. Sun here, sun there, sun everywhere. ? I wish you a happy Duanyang Festival!

26. Artemisia argyi dances in front of the high gate to ward off evil spirits and prevent the five poisons, and happily celebrate the Dragon Boat Festival.

27. The race is deeply sorrowful for thousands of years, and the loyal soul can be returned when it is gone. The country died today, leaving only Li Sao in the world.

28. A long time ago, after being laid off, Mr. Qu Yuan invented zongzi, but not only did it not sell well, but it was also exploited by local ruffians, so he was disheartened and finally went to Guangdong to jump into the sea.

29. Take off your coat. You are so white and tender, with a faint fragrance. When you lick it and take a bite, my heart will fly to the clouds. Ah, Zongzi, my favorite. I know, I can't be with you. I know that all I can do is miss you far away. Are you happy? Are you happy? I silently bless you. Happy Dragon Boat Festival!

3. Although you are in good health, Qu Yuan said: Only by exercising more and playing less mahjong can you eat more zongzi and be healthy every day.

31. secret: wrap the mobile phone in zongzi leaves and put it in a pot for 6 minutes, the battery life of the mobile phone will be doubled, the signal will be enhanced, and you can smell the fragrance of zongzi when you make a phone call.

32. Holding zongzi in hand, remembering Li Sao, the dragon boat crossed unexpectedly and went forward bravely! Happy Duanyang Festival!

33. When the Dragon Boat Festival arrives, we hang sachets and eat zongzi. Every household is really busy! Artemisia argyi dances in front of the high gate to ward off evil spirits, prevent the five poisons and celebrate the Dragon Boat Festival happily.

34. Mom: You used to force me to eat zongzi. Now, the child is not with his mother, so I weave a virtual zongzi for you by SMS, praying for the peace of the old father and mother in the world!

35. Turn off your mobile phone, close your eyes slowly, think about me and Zongzi, and you will find that I am as cute as Zongzi. ;