Those sarcastic and funny words on the Internet

1.

I heard that every Chinese touches their mobile phone an average of 150 times a day. I laughed: How is that possible? It's only once, pick it up when you wake up and put it down before going to bed.

——What netizens said

2.

(1) Your disease is very serious. (2) But it can still be cured. (3) But it requires a lot of money.

——The doctor’s three sentences can make you feel the ups and downs of life.

3.

The Chinese stock market is a completely speculative market... Enterprises do not pay dividends and cannot obtain internal income, but can only earn external income. A handling fee is charged for each transaction, and Chinese investors are like living Lei Feng, working for securities companies and the country.

——Cao Fengqi, Director of the Center for Finance and Securities Research at Peking University, commented on the Chinese stock market

4.

If a man has private money, he can hide it in the stock market , guarantee that no one will find out, because you don’t even know where the money went.

——The great hidden in the market, the stock market

5.

What is grabbing red envelopes? Just like in the old society in the past, the rich man stood in front of his house and grabbed a handful of copper coins. Throwing it out, a bunch of beggars were grabbing it and rolling around on the ground, making the rich man laugh.

——Don’t use all your good luck here

6.

After studying right and wrong for more than 20 years, I found that reality only talks about winning and losing. .

——Things are in color, not just black and white

7.

Don’t be jealous, don’t cater, have something to talk about, don’t be embarrassed.

——The best state for two people to get along

8.

Once moral fraud occurs, other frauds cannot be stopped.

——Yi Zhongtian believes that China’s hope lies in eight words: stick to the bottom line and not sing high-profile

10.

Take three thousand selfies, just take one .

——Self-cultivation for posting photos in Moments

11.

There are so many filial sons online, but it’s a pity that your mother doesn’t go online.

——Netizens sarcastically said, "Children are the most filial among friends."

12.

My Alipay is not worthy of your shopping cart.

——A kind of emotional sadness

13.

In many cases, the best education for children is enough: (1) Take responsibility and demonstrate; (3) be patient; (4) wait.

——It is not difficult to be a good parent

14.

My mother makes me furious. I don't like taking pictures, but she forced me to take pictures and post them on WeChat Moments.

——A 10-year-old girl complained about writing a diary on Children’s Day

15.

A person came from the opposite side and bumped into something called love; a car drove from the opposite side. A car crashes into a car accident. It's a pity that cars always collide with each other, and people always give way to each other.

——Line from the movie "Massage"

16.

Mediterranean pigtails, mustache, wooden-framed glasses, linen shirt, wide-leg pants with Buddhist beads, with Set a fake Ru kiln tea set, drink Lapsang bell, and talk about Nan Huaijin and Jiang Xun...

——Characteristics of the pan-Chinese literary youth

17.

All the anger on the Internet basically stems from lack of money; all the inspirational things on the Internet basically have the goal of making money; all the happiness posted on the Internet basically means having money.

——The Current Situation of the Internet

18.

One-third of Chinese buildings have thresholds; even if you cross the road from an alley, you may It means a life and death test.

——British man ElBaradei is a disabled person who has been in a wheelchair for more than 30 years, but this did not restrict his movement. He started his own journey around the world a few years ago. His travels around the world were going smoothly until he came to China.

19.

I can hold my breath, be angry, bend down, and raise my head.

——Yi Zhongtian comments on Sun Quan

20.

Every time I bargain, as long as I can cut off the price, I feel that I have been cheated.

——Bargaining Psychology

21.

Comparing salary to salary is a quick way to find unhappiness.

——Don’t just ask others how much money they make

22.

Women are like stocks. Once you buy a promising stock, it keeps falling. In the past, Invisible weaknesses and shortcomings are exposed; once thrown out, it becomes so cute again in the hands of others.

——Men evaluate women

23.

I don’t trade in stocks to make money, but because analyzing stocks requires using my brain, which makes it less likely to cause Alzheimer’s disease.

——A 97-year-old man from Hangzhou escaped the plunge by trading in stocks and was named a stock god. He claimed that stock trading was to prevent Alzheimer’s disease.

24.

If you have high EQ, you mainly want to make others happy; if you have high IQ, you mainly want to make yourself happy; if you have low IQ and low EQ, you mainly want to make yourself unhappy. You still don't want to make others happy.

——IQ and EQ

25.

People who dress up decently appear in decent places, see similar people, and are seen. This is social contact.

—— Zhang Ailing

26.

In China, it is very difficult to find qualified and reliable restaurant waiters, hourly workers, nannies, etc. Unless they serve leaders, such as waiters in the Great Hall of the People, Chinese people will not serve others patiently, willingly and attentively.

——Professor Wang Fuzhong of Central University of Finance and Economics talks about the service industry

27.

When chatting with friends, one sentence made an impression: "Immature market , the government did what the institutions did, protecting the index; the institutions did what the retail investors did, chasing the ups and downs; the retail investors did what the institutions did, taking over the market for the country.”

——Ye Tan

28.

The happiness of a 10-year-old is steaming and eating fresh; the happiness of a 20-year-old is stir-fried and eating fresh; the happiness of a 30-year-old is already braised and eating is an aftertaste. From now on, it will be the Buddha Jumping Over the Wall with mixed flavors and lasting fragrance.

——Xu Yi's "The Taste of Old Times" A collection of humorous and funny stories on the Internet

1. I have to work hard to save money and buy an ATM.

2. Just because I looked at you one more time in the crowd, I became blind later.

3. A true warrior dares to look at a beautiful girl and faces the bleak single life.

4. When a beautiful woman is in front of you, it would be a sin not to take advantage of her.

5. When you go to work, you must carry forward the spirit of a dead pig who is not afraid of boiling water!

6. Since ancient times, there have been no beautiful girls on the Internet. There are rows of ruined flowers and willows. There are occasionally a few pairs of mandarin ducks, which are also pheasants and wolves.

7. I like children, and I even like the process of making children!

8. A woman who is redder than red diamonds falls in love with a man who is more yellow than yellow diamonds. Finally, a mistress who was greener than a green diamond came along and gave birth to a son named Member.

9. Never argue with the same fool, because in the end, you will not be able to tell who is the fool.

10. People who say good night and go to bed are often still upset half an hour later.

11. Half of my life is unlucky, and the other half is dealing with unlucky things.

12. This wind is so obscene, it kissed me all over my mouth.

Thirteen. If the sky falls, you hold it up, and I will cushion it!

14. I originally wanted to give life a kiss, but reality gave me two slaps. Do you think that in return, I can not kick him?

15. There are thousands of Chinese people. If this doesn’t work, we must change it.

16. With the engraved banknote printing machine, you can make money quickly.

17. I think it’s good to make phone calls. Every word you say is valuable.

18. Only by eating all the time can I retain my full character.

19. Since people get tanned, their faces look better, their teeth become whiter, and they no longer blush when drinking.

20. Get up earlier than a chicken, go to bed later than a cat, and earn less hair than a bald man.

21. My heart is not a bus. It is not a place where you can sit down whenever there is space.

Twenty-two, if you go out and hang out, you will get annoyed sooner or later.

Twenty-three, I am so lonely that even my desires have been shaken off by me.

24. Those who can’t lose weight are always in commotion, and those who can’t eat fat have nothing to fear.

25. What you wear is dangerous, but you look very safe.

Twenty-six. Ten years ago, I could beat your father to death with one slap. Ten years later, I can still beat you to death with one slap... Go to hell, mosquitoes!

Twenty-seven, when are the two lovers embracing each other? The two are watching the fun.

28. Things that can be taken away are not things.

Twenty-nine, one-third is destiny, and seven-tenths depends on dressing up.

Thirty. When looking at beautiful women on the street, if you look higher, you are admiring them; if you look lower, you are a gangster.

Thirty-one. Because I was too heartfelt in the past, I am heartless now.

Thirty-two. If you don’t fart, hold it in and it will hurt your heart; if you don’t fart, squeeze hard and exercise; if I fart, everyone pay attention; when the fart sounds, everyone applauds!

Thirty-three, you are the best example of failed abortion! Sarcastic words_About ironic words

Sarcastic words_About ironic words_

Sarcasm

Sarcastic sayings are expressed in humorous language Criticizing people and things, the literal expression is straightforward and concise, but the meaning is implicit, often placing the interlocutor in a satirical and demeaning position, without the other party being aware of it. Sarcastic proverbs are excellent representatives of language art and are the crystallization of wisdom created and summarized by the people in their long-term social life and interpersonal interactions.

A dwarf who is too short (a metaphor for a dwarf who is cunning and has many ideas)

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The dwarf has a lot of lumps in his belly

Loves to eat jujube soup (oldly refers to a woman who is greedy for amorous feelings)

Ai Qiao is so cold that she jumps

Secretly Knife

Eight-foot thick skin

Eight-foot thick skin can't be beaten

Eight-faced (a metaphor for being arrogant and not enthusiastic towards others)

To open the fence and let the dog get through (a metaphor to help bad people do bad things, and also a metaphor to ask for trouble)

To pull out weeds to find snakes (a metaphor to provoke evil people, to ask for trouble)

Pull out a short ladder (a metaphor for breaking a contract and breaking a promise, crossing a river and burning a bridge)

Licking up the spit again (a metaphor for talking without keeping one's words)

Wearing a human skin in vain

Daydreaming

Cooking in plain water is bland and tasteless

Sugar in the mouth and arsenic in the heart

Clumsy and incompetent (referring to being very clumsy and without any skills)

Barnyard grass cannot bloom, and dogs cannot spit out ivory.

Shooting oneself in the foot

Half a human face, half a dog face .

A half-pound duck with four mouths (meaning talking too much or talking incessantly)

Taking the stairs halfway

Eating watermelon with bucked teeth

Carrying an ox's head on one's back and not admitting one's fault

Having a nose like an eagle's beak, digging out brain blood during work

Closing the eyes to catch sparrows

Closing the eyes to eat caterpillars, closing the eyes to catch sparrows (To describe doing things haphazardly, the probability of success is very low. Tossing around)

The bat didn’t realize it and laughed at Liang Shangyan (a metaphor for the lack of self-knowledge)

The whip hits the fast ox ( It is a metaphor that rewards and punishments are unclear, and diligent people are punished)

I turned into a pig, but I am still afraid of being killed

I turned into a dog and I am not afraid of having shit to eat

Chameleon (metaphor) A person who adapts to the wind and is good at changing and disguising)

Bianyebao (a metaphor for people who are lazy or incompetent and can only rely on others to survive)

One thing on the surface but another in the heart

The doves and pigeons fly when they are prosperous. Indiscriminate

Don't dare to pinch stones, only pinch tofu

Can't ride a horse and blame the saddle, can't climb mountains and blame the mountains

Don't open your eyes

If you don’t poop, you will occupy the manhole

If you are not afraid of wolves, you are afraid of house rats

If you are not afraid of the strong wind, your tongue will flash out (sarcastic people who tell lies are not afraid of being exposed, or are not afraid of being exposed) Embarrassing)

Unkind, unloving, unfaithful and unfilial

Ignorant, raising a pig

Not trying to fish, just trying to muddy the water

I don’t blame the wolf for eating the sheep, I only blame the sheep for going uphill

Wealth is life, life is wealth

I stepped on your tail

I stepped on it Climb up on other people's shoulders

Even if a fly flies by, you have to twist your leg

Flies can't see blood, corrupt officials can't see money

The cursive characters are out of order, and gods can't Recognize

Destroy the house (doing things carelessly and irresponsibly, making things too bad to deal with)

Pulling the tiger's tail to show off one's prestige

It will not become a climate

Not enough success, more than enough failure

Taking advantage of others' danger and adding insult to injury

Taking the wrong medicine

I feel like dying after eating, but I am afraid of dying from exhaustion when working.

Eat like a pig, be angry like a tiger

Eat the courage of a leopard (a metaphor for daring)

Eat rushes, speak more lightly

Took ecstasy

Took gunpowder

To have eaten uncooked rice (a metaphor for a person's attitude being very stiff and irritable)

To have eaten grains and thought six things Grain, one wants to become an emperor after becoming an emperor (grain: usually refers to rice, millet, yellow rice, millet, sorghum, wheat sprouts, and beans, which is a metaphor for greed and greed)

Eat inside and outside

Eating from a bowl in the pot, looking at the pot

Eat people without spitting out the bones

Even if you eat lice, you will have to take off one of your feet (a metaphor for any matter, big or small, as long as it passes through his hands) Take advantage)

Eat Yazai without spitting out the bones (Yazai: child. Metaphor for being cruel and vicious)

Eat a bowl of dog meat for a lifetime and eat meat

Eating fish is also stained with fishy smell, and catching fish is also stained with fishy smell

Eating from the bowl Inside, looking into the pot/Eating out of the bowl, looking into the pot/Eating out of the bowl and looking into the plate

To eat a louse, you have to tear off a foot (metaphor for all things big and small) To take advantage)

A stupid cat is waiting for a dead mouse

A pet maid is a housekeeper, and if the key doesn’t ring, use your hand to plucking the thorn.

It is a metaphor that a villain will show off when he is proud)

An ugly gourd cannot produce a good scoop

An ugly horse gives birth to a bad foal (Part 2: Life)

Ugly people often make mischief , the leper wants to wear flowers

Stinky fish look for rotten shrimps

Stinky meat attracts flies, flies look for smelly meat

One oar on the first day of the lunar month, one oar on the second day of the lunar month ( Oar: A tool placed on the stern of a ship to move the ship forward. It is larger than an oar.

It is a metaphor for procrastinating and inefficiency)

Wear green to protect green

Wear new shoes and follow the same old path (often used to describe using old methods and old routines to deal with new things you face) , new situation)

Boast to the sky

Blow the trumpet, carry the sedan chair (a metaphor for working for the benefit of others or flattering and flattering)

Bragging and talking big words

The spring breeze cannot enter the donkey's ears (a metaphor for not listening to good advice)

There are no three hundred taels of silver here (a mockery of people's stupid behavior, trying to hide it, but instead exposing the truth)

A smart face but a stupid person (referring to a person with a beautiful face but not smart)

Smart but poor, comatose and unlucky

A smart person corrects his mistakes, and a confused person corrects them when he sees them. Hide it

Be smart for a lifetime, be confused for a while / Be smart for a lifetime, be ignorant for a while

Rotten from the stomach (a metaphor for a person who is very insidious)

Put on a stinking air ( Refers to putting on airs and thinking one is superior to others)

Set up a stage to sell tofu, but do not have any airs about business

A defeated quail fights a defeated chicken

Cannot provoke a fox Body Sao

If you can’t beat a wild dog, you can beat a domestic dog / If you can’t beat a wild wolf, you can beat a domestic dog

If you can’t beat the country, kill Han Xin

If you can’t beat a tiger, you can’t vent your anger on a sheep

A spanking will not leak out residue, and a skin coat will not leak out water (a metaphor for being considerate or stingy)

Breaking a soup can will cause a flood of water (a metaphor for pretending to be a minor illness)

Wishful thinking

Don’t be a monk after fasting

Beat the blind and call the dumb

Move with the fox and rabbit

Beat the blind Put a duck on the shelf and force the mute to speak

Make a bloated face to pretend to be fat

Make a swollen face to pretend to be fat, stand on tiptoes to make the eldest son (tiptoes: touch the ground with toes)

Talking in sleep in broad daylight

Dreaming in broad daylight

When soldiers pass by, the fence is broken

Big things don’t count in small things

Big words , flashy

When the eldest sister gets married, the second sister panics (a metaphor for someone who has done something well, and the other person is in a hurry)

Open the temple door without burning incense, and things will come to an end Xu Zhuyang (a metaphor for not doing meritorious deeds at ordinary times, only getting anxious when something happens)

Big cat head, rat tail

Cannon to kill mosquitoes

Big things can't be done, small things can't be done Don't want to do it

The eagle flies over and plucks out the hair, and the egg passes through the hand lightly

If you can't catch the tiger, take it out on the cat

If you can't catch the rabbit, catch the dog.

Catch a donkey and ride it as a horse

Meet God with a granite mind

Be a thief with a bell

Wear tinted glasses Look at people

Cowardly as a rat, cruel as a wolf

A gong in front of you, a drum behind you

A person in front of you, a ghost behind you

Say one thing to your face and another behind your back

Talk like a human, talk like a ghost

A stupid old man with a dull knife

A slap in the face

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Eat sheep heads in the east, pig heads in the west

Be good and cheap

If you get three points of color, you will open a dyeing workshop

If you get one Sheep, lost a cow

Reasonable and not letting others

The victorious cat is as happy as the tiger (describes being carried away because of the victory and feeling great)

When you get a house, you miss your wife. When you get a house, you miss your wife (wife: wife)

When you get an inch, you advance a foot

When you get an inch, you can see ten; when you get ten, you can see hundreds

Leave the ox behind and chase away the mosquitoes

Throw away the meat in your mouth and wait for the fish in the river

Turn stone into gold, but people's hearts are still not satisfied

Stand on tiptoes to be the eldest son

Hang The neck ghost goes to the bank

Afraid of breaking his head if the leaves fall

Standing against the wind and smelling ten miles away

If you can't do it in the east, you can't do it in the west

East one A hammer, a stick in the west

A hammer in the east, an ax in the west

I can't read the word "dou big"

I can't read the word "dou big"

Dou rice to see the sky high

Stomach aches and blame the Stove King

Measure others but not yourself (measure: measure)

Even squatting in the rice cooker Starve to death

Squat in a rice bowl and starve to death

Jump into the river to hide from the rain (overdoing something to prevent something from happening, only to make it worse)

A hungry dog ??is not afraid of a stick

A hungry dog ??can’t stop eating shit

A hungry dog ??can’t live without a hut

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A hungry dog ??wants to fly as a bird

How can a hungry ghost keep his mouth shut

Crocodile tears (a metaphor for false compassion)

Soft ears ( A metaphor for not having an independent opinion and being easy to listen to flattery or instigation)

It is difficult to make money for the country

Fainting cannot prevent death (refers to pretentiousness so that one's temper cannot solve the problem)

Firing fire Wealth

Put the bowl instead of chopsticks (a metaphor for not being straightforward)

Put down the dog-beating stick and scold the beggar

Let go of the cattle thief and catch him Piles

Soap bubbles will burst by themselves

The wind blows on both sides

The wind is loud and the raindrops are light

Crazy dogs bite people randomly

Bee sugar mouth, bitter melon heart, a gentleman on the outside, a villain on the inside.

Be deceived when good things happen, and fear when bad things happen

Reading "The Classic of Filial Piety" in front of Master's door (Master: an honorific title for scholars in the old days)

Can't help me The adou of

Holding up the wall to draw the ladder

The rich and the high are joined by others, and the poor and the low are separated from relatives (describing people who dislike the poor and love the rich, and tend to be popular)

Blow the fire with the rolling pin, Know nothing

It doesn’t rain when it thunders

Work like a worm and eat like a dragon

As soon as he put down the dog-beating stick, he scolded the beggar

If you are not good enough, you will not be good enough

The beggar saw the bacon

The beggar warmed himself by the fire, only eating his own crotch

Twisting his elbows outward

Falling short of the mark (a metaphor for speaking and writing articles that fails to grasp the theme and key points, is not pertinent, and is not appropriate.

Or it is a metaphor for not grasping the key point of doing things, not solving the problem, and the effort is in vain)

If you are given a mallet, use it as a needle / Give a mallet and treat it as a needle (needle: a true homophone)

Can’t give it Open the dyeing room with three colors

Follow the people and become a dog

Follow the monkey to make harmony

Follow the baton

Rooster head, grass chicken head, don't care about this one but the other one (grass chicken: hen)

Dog eats cow dung and is greedy for a lot of it

Dog eats cow dung and is greedy for too much/dog eats cow dung As long as there are more

A dog wears a hat to pretend to be a good person

A dog barks and a tiger does not know how to die

A dog cannot change and eat shit

A dog cannot spit out Out of ivory

A dog has no ivory in its mouth

The dog praises its tail (a Dong proverb)

The dog picks up three piles of feces (a metaphor for greed)

The dog picked up three piles of feces and couldn’t eat the piles

The dog didn’t know how to lift the sedan chair

The dog licked the millstone and went around in circles

The dog-headed military advisor was confused. King

The dog's leg is pulled on the sheep's crotch

The dog's heart is in the donkey's belly

The dog wags its tail to show courtesy

Dog bites dog

Dogs party on bones

Dogs cannot spit ivory sarcastic words from their mouths

Sarcastic words

Incompletely evolved life forms, genes Mutated aliens,

Kindergarten-level high school students, frog heads born with Mongolian syndrome,

The abandoned baby of the Mount Everest snowman, the murderer of clogged septic tanks,

Descendants of black people from Africa, chimpanzees with imbalanced yin and yang,

Hippopotamus crushed by Noah’s Ark, new volcanic vents,

Super shameless voice transmission Loudspeaker, the shame of the Eskimos,

A superorganism that survives with cockroaches, a semi-plant with decayed vitality,

A smelly garbage man, "spurned" The origin of the noun,

A dinosaur that degenerates three times a day, the strongest waste material in human history,

An old washing machine dropped by God by mistake, a brainless creature that can think,

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The scourge that damages the reputation of our Asian compatriots, the descendants whose ancestors have been humiliated by it,

The humus accumulated for thousands of years, the primitive species that scientists dare not study,

10 A sedimentary material with twice the concentration of petroleum, a disfigured Ronald McDonald,

A hateful guy like you:

can only act like a turd in a TV series,

It’s not as good as the chewing gum that has been spilled by dogs on the roadside.

Even Ruhua is more than 10 times more handsome than you.

To find a girlfriend, you have to go to the zoo or even leave the earth.

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If you want to commit suicide, someone will only advise you not to leave a body to avoid polluting the environment.

Not even Amoeba protozoa can survive on the keyboard you have touched.

The saliva you spit out is more deadly than SARS.

If you act cute, you can instantly solve the problem of population expansion.

If you act cool and look cool, humans will have to use asexual reproduction.

Idiots can be your teachers, even retarded people can teach you how to speak human language.

As long as you raise your head, the ozone layer will break.

I want to immigrate to Mars because I want to leave you. ,

If your ugliness can generate electricity, nuclear power plants around the world can be shut down.

If you go to war, bullets and missiles will not be able to help but fly towards you.

The grenade will explode when it sees you.

Others have to fly a plane to hit the Gemini stars, but you can have the same power just by parachuting.

All the famous places you have visited will become monuments. , have you been

The monuments will become history.

I have not done anything good in my 18 lifetimes before I know you. Even throwing it into the sun is not environmentally friendly enough.

Anyway, one sentence: Don’t let me see you again. You, if I see you,

I will definitely kill you!

How to say that a person is ugly?

1. Terrifyingly ugly .....So creative

2. Were you kissed by a pig when you were a child?

3. You look very patriotic, dedicated and courageous

4. You look so creative and live so courageously!

5. You look so post-modern

6. You look like a car accident scene

7. Your appearance is out of proportion

8. Why are you covering your face with your butt!

9. I think there are only two kinds of people in the world The one that attracts people is the one that is very beautiful, just like you

10. Your appearance is very refreshing!!

11. You need to reinvent yourself

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12. How can they call you a pig? This is too outrageous! You can't just call people whatever they look like! How can they say you look like a pig? That's an insult to a pig.

13. Damn, you look so damn easy to recognize.

14. It looks like science fiction, and it looks very abstract!

15. I have seen ugly people, but never such ugly ones. It looks ugly at first glance, but it gets even uglier upon closer inspection!

16. He looks very innocent, but looks sorry for the people and the party.

17. Your height slows down the Internet speed, and your length consumes too much memory

18. If you chase me for two kilometers naked and I look back, I will be considered a gangster!

19. Brother, can you lower the resolution on your face?

20. You look illegal!

21. International face Universally applicable

22. I looked at him with regret and said, "Can the surgery make it come back?"

23. Your appearance has exceeded human imagination...

24. You act like a beast!!

25. You haven’t fully evolved yet, and your human-like appearance will really make things difficult for you.

26. I want to watch you talk, but why do you bury your face in your butt?...Oh? I’m sorry, I don’t know that’s your face, so where is your butt?

27. I don’t want to hit you anymore. You go to the zoo to see if there is a suitable job for you. You can easily be shot by the police if you run around on the street like this.

28. MMD, I have never seen one with such archaeological value.

29. The long MMD is so uncanny

What can you do that you can’t do? There is nothing left after eating anything

There is an orangutan in the zoo that is extremely ugly. I vomited when I took one look at it. He vomited when he took a look at it.

I should have known it earlier. You are so disappointing, I shouldn't have been having sex with a couple of lovers in the first place, 60 electric lights are shining! Thank you! I specialize in helping people solve problems, I don't care about other things! 1. I have been friends with you for so long, You have always cared about me, but I often cause you trouble. I really don’t know how to convince you. Therefore, if you live as a cow or a horse in your next life, I will definitely pull grass for you to eat.

2. If you were a shooting star, I would pursue you. If you were a satellite, I would wait for you. If you were a star, I would fall in love with you. Unfortunately, you are a gorilla!

3. Meeting you is the beginning of my heartbeat; falling in love with you is my happy choice; having you is my most precious wealth; stepping onto the red carpet is my eternal motivation. Unfortunately - I sent the message to the wrong person.

4. Because of you, I believe in the arrangement of fate. Maybe all this is destined by God and is pulling us both.

What I want to say now is - what evil did I commit in my previous life?

5. Starting from tomorrow, the city has decided to eliminate all mentally handicapped young people who are ugly and detract from the appearance of the city! You pack your things quickly , go out to avoid the limelight, and don’t tell anyone that I informed you. Remember! No need to say thank you!

6. God saw you were thirsty and created water; God saw you were hungry and created water. M; God saw that you had no lovely friends, so he created me; however, he also saw that there were no idiots in the world, so he also created you.

7. Missing you is a happy thing! Loving you is what I will always do! Keeping you in my heart is what I have always done! However, lying to you is what is happening!

8. According to statistics, more than 99.9% of people who look like pig heads use their thumbs to press buttons to read text messages! Hey, no need to change hands, it’s too late, pig head!

9. If being beautiful is a mistake, I have made a big mistake; if being smart is a sin, I have committed a heinous crime. Being a human being is really difficult. But you are fine, you are right and not guilty, I really envy you!

10. If burning incense for one year can make me meet you, and burning incense for three years can make me acquainted with you, then burning incense for three years can make me acquainted with you. 10 years of fragrance can cherish you. Therefore, for the sake of my happiness in the next life, I am willing to convert to Christianity!

11 During the Anti-Japanese War, it would be eight years before you were around. As soon as you left Japan, you fled back. Moreover, thinking about China is a painful memory that will never heal, and future generations will be affected.

12 You look very hazy, you look very abstract, your hair is so long (I will be satisfied if you play Sadako) Don’t let me talk about you, I can’t say, because I really haven’t met you. Have you ever been to a ghost (very suitable for "skeleton")