The ex didn't return messages or answer the phone. Why didn't my predecessor return the message or delete it?

? My predecessor and I didn't leave because we didn't like it, but we had feelings. Later, we broke up, and I looked for him and sent him a message. He just didn't reply after seeing it. It feels as if he doesn't know what to say and is avoiding me. .

After reading it, I only have one thought: why didn't he pull you black?

Have you ever wanted to reply to a person's message for a while, and you couldn't help reading a lot of other people's messages just to see what this person said!

After reading it, I sat there alone and got angry. Sometimes I am angry and want to go back and refute each other, but in the end I want to forget it. I don't want to talk to him.

This situation is similar to the mentality of people who don't return messages. If they don't come back on purpose, they won't hack you. If you are all right, he must have read it, but he can't hack you after reading it.

What should I do if I want to save it?

Let me get this straight: don't worry about what others think, first sort out your own thoughts, and frequently send messages to your ex because you are unwilling, because you can't change your habits, or because you really want to save each other. No matter what the reason is, if you don't want to, then the problem lies with yourself, not the other party. It doesn't matter whether he can come back to you. The important thing is that you want to make it right.

Next, let's talk about the specific situation of recovery.

In most cases, the reason why the other party didn't delete your contact information is simple:

Just break up, you can't be friends, and you don't have to be blacked out like an enemy. A friend who likes you is the most suitable distance for two people.

If so, don't give yourself too much drama and self-moving drama.

The more inner drama you have, the more love you have, the more love you have. I don't want to be apart from you? The more accustomed you are to finding evidence from the other person's performance that he regrets this relationship, feels deeply sad and doesn't want to be separated from you, the easier it is to fall into the strange circle where the other person still loves you and you think you still have a chance, and then you will never get out.

Overcome inertia

If you can't change the habit of getting along, then the problem is still on yourself, and you need to find a way to solve it yourself. You lived alone when the other person didn't appear in your life, and now you can do the same after breaking up.

The most effective way to break the habit is to constantly enrich the existing life.

? Some tips: Don't underestimate these actions? Buy yourself a ticket to see the outside world, buy yourself a beautiful dress, find a new hobby and learn a new skill, all of which can help you break your habits and break your inner circle.

If you can't let go or let go, you can only tell yourself to stop loss in time. After all, your predecessor is more calm than you in this respect.

Re-provide methods and pay attention to each other's emotional details.

If you really want to save it, you should reflect on whether there is something wrong with your way and method of saving it, more specifically, as mentioned in the question, whether the content of the message sent is inappropriate and inappropriate. It's like holding a plate of sand in your hand. If you want to hold it in your hand, you can't make a strong fist, but hold it gently.

So, how to save it? No? Quick success? Instead, pay attention to the details.

Analyze the problems that caused you to break up and provide each other with a convincing compound reason. Simple and rude information bombardment and frequent negative emotional output often backfire. So, if it's just an impulse, the most important thing to do is how to ease the relationship between two people by lowering each other's expectations. Guard against? Psychology, establish a positive connection with it.

How to reduce each other's defensive psychology and rebuild contact?

? The first step is to be calm, keep your distance and hide your emotional needs.

Just breaking up is not the right time for you to express your desire to get back together At this time, due to the inertia of getting along, it is very common for both sides to keep in touch. However, at the same time, both parties, especially the other party, have not yet come out of the negative emotion of breaking up and rashly take action to express their desire to get back together with each other. One is that they are not calm and rational enough, and the other is that the effect is not great, or even counterproductive.

Waiting for a period of time, when emotions and memories still exist but don't seem strong enough, is the right time to take action, and the chances of getting back together will be greatly improved.

Keep calm, don't disturb each other, and think clearly about what you need to do in the future without losing contact:

a

First of all, we should find out the real reason why two people break up and think about how to solve it, such as whether their usual performance will make the other party feel disrespected and neglected, such as whether they can't communicate well but just quarrel and vent their emotions when they encounter conceptual differences, and so on.

b

After that, change your image, get rid of some bad habits that the other person doesn't like in feelings, change the old look with a new look, bring the other person a refreshing and deja vu feeling, and let the other person see your new changes and have different expectations.

? The second step is to learn to change your identity.

After changing yourself, don't rush to get back together directly.

After becoming an ex, you can maintain normal contact, even if you want to get back together unilaterally, you can't flatter yourself. Don't take the other person's temporary response (answering messages, answering the phone, responding with a good attitude) and emotional repetition as something you can do? Crossing the line? Reason.

Just? Crossing the line? , the other party will immediately produce a? Oh, I'm tired again. You really shouldn't give a good face? The reaction. Once the other party makes such a reaction, it will aggravate your gains and losses, and then make more irrational behavior, a vicious circle, farther and farther away from your expectations.

In other words, when we just broke up, we shouldn't pester ourselves too much and bomb the news, because it will easily make the other party feel disgusted and disgusted. Communication is ok, but you should learn to establish contact as a friend and avoid cross-border communication as a lover. Gradually lower each other's standards in cross-border communication? Guard against? Psychology.

? The third step is heart-to-heart communication, taking retreat as progress, and letting the other party have inner fluctuations.

Choose a suitable opportunity, or express your thoughts in words or words (preferably in person). From the happy memories of those years when we were together, we can inspire each other's positive emotions and let them feel it? Was it really interesting to be with this person before? .

After that, I apologize and reflect, and apologize for the trouble and bad experience I caused to the other party before. Finally, tell the other person that what you have done is not to meet again, but to feel what you have done in retrospect and reflection and sincerely apologize, and wish the other person to meet someone better than yourself after you.

Like what? I'm sorry to have caused you a lot of harm before, but my immaturity has caused many unnecessary contradictions. I'm not telling you this to harass you, but to help you untie your heart. I sincerely apologize and sincerely wish you a good life, so I think we'd better get along easily and happily with a cold face? Yun Yun, pave the way according to different situations.

Usually, after such a series of preliminary preparations, the relationship between two people will ease a lot. After that, contact slowly, find the right opportunity to express your compound thoughts to each other and arouse more emotional memories of each other.

As long as normal people don't have a deep hatred with you, they won't refuse your active reconciliation at this time, unless the contradiction between you is too deep and you haven't solved the problem yet.

Of course, in the process of seeking reorganization, in addition to grasping the overall rhythm of reorganization as mentioned above, we should also pay attention to the following two points:

? First of all, we must clarify the compound purpose and face up to our own values.

If you are a girl, you want to save each other in your heart, except to become? Please. In addition, it is easy to fall into another common misunderstanding, that is, girls who are too active will not be cherished.

That was not the case. If you are a valuable bill, whether you are brand-new, old, wrinkled or stained, whether you are in a conspicuous place or in a corner where no one passes by, as long as one day you are found, others will only choose to pick you up, wash you and put you in your pocket.

However, if you are just an ordinary heavy stone, no matter how many names you package for yourself, others will discover your true colors in the process of long-term contact and will abandon you at the first time, because you occupy too much space in your pocket and consume too much carrying energy.

In other words, whether you will be cherished by the other party and whether the other party will choose to get back together with you depends to a greater extent on the embodiment of your own value and ability, and whether you have something to be cherished.

However, it is too difficult to admit and accept your mediocrity. Don't easily choose to incorporate some stylized ways and techniques, but enrich yourself, improve yourself and grow yourself.

In addition, after breaking up, if you have a desire to get back together as a girl, you must take the initiative to pursue it.

This is an experience I have experienced. Don't think that girls will not be cherished if they actively pursue boys. In fact, many girls only walk a few steps, and finally the boys work hard in the later period, and the girls are spoiled.

Taking the initiative is a good thing. First of all, only the initiative in the relationship has the right to choose.

Secondly, as the active party, the other party must be the one you are satisfied with, so that you will cherish and fear this relationship more after the successful reunion;

Third, sometimes the other person can't guess what you think. If the other person has the same idea as you, but he doesn't know what to do, because he should always keep his distance after breaking up. Your expression of your actions is to provide the other person with a clear direction.

Don't underestimate each other? I turn a blind eye to the performance that I should be with you? In terms of ability, if both sides have this idea, then one person must take this step first. People who take the initiative will have an advantage.

? Second, in the case of irreparable, we must know how to stop loss in time.

Sometimes, wishful thinking doesn't necessarily mean that you still like each other, but the sinking cost is too high, and you don't want to admit it, so you can't bear to give up inexplicably and fruitlessly.

People will meet too many people in this life, but too few people like and suit each other. If you encounter it, please complain less, understand and cherish it more, and don't wait until you lose it to regret it.

Even if you are quite sure that you are not unwilling, some people just can't get it back, so stop loss in time is to protect your dignity.

If you get nothing in the later period, 99% people will lose themselves. No matter how good you are in advance, if you don't get this person at the last minute, you will inevitably collapse.

This person may just be a wall and can't move. There is no way. Since there will be no result if we continue, I would advise you to stop the loss in time. Where is this boundary? It's simple. See if you can bear the pain at this moment. If you can't, don't give yourself chicken blood even if you leave.

As for emotional matters, it is the same for a man who knows the times to be a hero. Salvation is a protracted war, but don't blindly use ferocity. Your comfort is also very important. I'm sure everyone you've experienced has felt this way.

Finally, I want to say that when your partner is saved, he will panic. After all, everyone's heart is made of meat, and no one can really miss a person's kindness to him. If he still misses you a little, he must seize this opportunity to try. I hope you all have a lover, a second time.