Jokes that instantly make girls happy

Jokes to make girls happy instantly

Jokes to make girls happy instantly. In our emotional life, emotions will have many changes, and it is actually difficult for lovers to last long. It happens. Sometimes we can promote the feelings between each other through the following words and jokes that will make girls happy instantly. 1. Jokes to make girls happy instantly 1

1. Humorous jokes to make girls happy:

1. Yesterday, I fought with mosquitoes all night, and ended up in a tie. It didn’t have enough to eat. , I didn’t sleep well.

2. If you are always disappointed, then you should reflect on why you have so much hope.

3. Who said I can’t persist in doing things? I have been single for ten years and have never wavered.

4. Love is like multiplication, one of the terms is zero, and the result is always zero.

5. When life doesn’t go your way, don’t panic. Look at your wallet and savings and just cry.

6. The daily status of a foodie: I enjoy it in my mouth, but I want to lose weight in my heart.

7. After taking the English listening test, I realized a truth: some words should only be spoken to those who understand them.

8. If the whole world doesn’t want you anymore, remember to come to me. I know several human traffickers.

9. If you think the person you like also likes you, it only means that you have a rich imagination.

10. As a person who has been there, my advice to young people is: don’t come here.

11. When I see people pretending to be cool, I lower my head. It’s not that I’m being modest, but I’m actually looking for a brick.

Two humorous jokes to make girls happy:

1. I did the roller coaster today. When it was about to start, I took out the screws I prepared in advance and patted the guys in the front row. on his back, and then said, buddy, a few of these things fell off your stool.

2. The chef in the cafeteria is probably out of love, because I found that the newly changed menu has a unique scenery: ecstasy lotus root slices, heartbroken cucumbers, fat facelift, lentils in memory, shredded tofu, pure love wood Beard meat.

3. One night I took a taxi home drunk. The fare was 18 yuan and I gave the driver 50 yuan. When the driver saw that I was drunk, he asked me for 2 yuan. I watched him while drunk. Driver, the driver asked me: How much did you give me? I said 100 yuan, and the driver immediately said: It was obviously 50 yuan.

4. Brother, stop touching me! Such tender skin is so tender when you touch it! How do you want me to sell it in the future? These peaches are all fresh, just forget it if you don’t want to buy them!

5. On a dark night, it was already past 3 o'clock in the night. A taxi driver was driving on the road. Suddenly, he was blocked by a woman with a pale face. , wearing a white suit. (Coax girls to calm down and be happy)

6. Chatting with a classmate who works in a foreign company, she said that there are many foreigners in the company. I asked her: Have you taught them to speak Chinese? Her: Of course, the first sentence I teach is: I pay the bill!

7. In the morning, I went to buy breakfast at a Chaos store. I said I wanted two bowls. During the cooking process, the boss said: Pack it or take it away? I was shocked, and the boss asked loudly whether to pack it or take it away? I asked with trepidation whether I could eat here?

Three humorous jokes to make girls happy:

1. In the past, as long as the feelings were true, age did not matter. But now, as long as the feelings are true, gender is not an issue.

2. If there is anything you don’t like about me, please overcome it yourself.

3. Don’t praise me, really, especially don’t praise me for being handsome. I’m afraid I can’t stand it and will have to follow you for the rest of my life.

4. In fact, I am not stupid, I am just too lazy to be smart. (Coax girls to calm down and be happy)

5. I lacked calcium when I was a child, and I lacked love when I grew up.

6. It was the woman who was not given to him at first, but it was the woman who was eager to get it later!

7. Let the storm come more violently. I sell umbrellas anyway!

8. No need for words, let me tell you with actions what love is.

9. I am really simple, thinking about how to kiss you all day long.

10. After you are with me, you can wash the dishes if you want and mop the floor if you want. Isn’t this free enough? Jokes to make girls happy instantly 2

Jokes to make girls happy

1. My girlfriend said that you see how loving the uncle and the aunt next door are, and they still call each other even when they are old. The other person is dear. As a result, the uncle said, "Don't mention it. I suddenly forgot her name a few years ago and didn't dare to ask, so I could only call her honey."

2. Dear, this may be the last text message I send you. Taking this opportunity, I want to say something to you that I have wanted to say for a long time but have never said it: help me. Recharge, otherwise my phone will shut down!

3. I had a strange dream last night, please help me explain it: Just when I was about to turn around and leave, I heard you crying helplessly behind me, heart-breaking. The pain made me realize in an instant how much I love you. I turned around and hugged you: This pig is not for sale.

4. There was a young mother holding her child while waiting for the bus at the station. Someone secretly commented that her child was ugly. She cried sadly after hearing this. At this time, a gentleman couldn't stand it any longer. He came over to comfort her and said, "Don't cry. Give this banana to your monkey."

5. A group of roosters chased a hen. Everyone showed their talents to attract the hen's attention. When the hen saw one of the roosters bowing his head and saying nothing, he became excited. On the wedding night, the hen: You are so cool, why didn’t you crow then? Rooster: I drank too much that day...I was afraid of vomiting.

6. An officer was conducting an examination for new soldiers. The officer asked: In the dark night, you are standing guard, and suddenly someone hugs you from behind. What should you say? A warrior quickly replied: My dear, let me go.

7. There was a large ship on the sea. Its original capacity was 60 people. However, it only carried 59 people and it sank into the sea! why is that? Answer: This is a submarine.

8. On the bus, a young man caressed his girlfriend’s thigh in a miniskirt: Honey, I love you! The girlfriend was so caressed that she was fascinated: "More, a little higher!" The young man raised his voice: Honey, I love you! Attracting everyone in the car to watch.

9. Baby, you are the sun in my heart, the moon in front of me, the fragrance of flowers under my nose, the breeze in my ears, the clouds above my head, and the clear spring behind me. Unfortunately, I accidentally stepped on you. You——Grasshopper Xiaoqiang!

10. Who is the person who loves to inquire about other people’s affairs? Answer: Journalist. Who is fussing all day long at work? Answer: Chef. When taking the violin grading exam (hit an animal) the answer is: Koala, the test is about playing.

11. A Ming wrote an anonymous letter to a girl he had a crush on. The girl became agitated at first and then called the police. It turned out that the anonymous letter was made up of typefaces cut out from newspapers: I have been paying attention to you for a long time.

12. A new recruit always got scolded after getting up late, so he bought dye to wear on his clothes, which looked like camouflage uniforms. When the bugle sounded in the middle of the night, he came out of the barracks first. The commander praised him: Very good! But next time be careful to hang the grenade on the back. Jokes to make girls happy instantly 3

Jokes to make girls happy

1. Sleeping in class: A student fell asleep during class and was discovered by the teacher.

Teacher: "Why did you sleep during class?" Student: "I didn't sleep!" Teacher: "Then why did you close your eyes?" Student: "I closed my eyes and meditated!" Teacher: "Then why did you nod your head? "Student: "What you just said makes sense!" Teacher: "Then why are you drooling?" Student: "Teacher, you said it with gusto!"

2. Get up: The mother asked her son to get up:' Good boy, it’s time to get up. You’ve heard the rooster crow several times. Son 2: What does the rooster’s crow have to do with me? I'm not a hen'

3. Me too: The husband held an orchid bowl and said to his wife very solemnly: "Don't throw the bowl again in the future. This bowl was left by your mother." , there are only two left now, and you have thrown away the others." The wife rolled her eyes at her husband and said, "Then don't be angry with me anymore, I am also the one left by my mother.

4. Who said that domestic products are not useful: My wife likes online shopping and thinks about overseas shopping every day. On Monday, I went on a business trip to a certain country, and my wife asked me to bring this with me: "Bring some xxx back, the domestic products are not useful." : "Who said that the RMB is not made in China? ”

5. Choke it to death: The elephant accidentally stepped on the ant nest, and the ants came out of the nest and climbed on the elephant one after another. The elephant shook its body and the ants fell off. This is There was an ant falling from the elephant's neck, and he yelled "Strangle it to death"

6. Be domineering when striking up a conversation: If you have a crush on a girl, you want to. When you want to express your love to her, you should simply push her against the wall and say domineeringly: I will support you from now on. After saying that, you should kiss her and don't give her a chance to refuse or think. I relied on this trick to get her. Several girls suffered concussions!

7. When I went to withdraw money today, there was a man staring at me from behind.

I was so nervous that I typed in my password several times. If he was wrong, he turned around and said to him: "Why do you want to rob me? "

He said: "I just want to see how much money you can withdraw by putting your ID card in." ”

8. Hospitalization for intervertebral disc herniation requires minimally invasive surgery. A female nurse came to advise on the precautions during the surgery. Seeing that she was beautiful, she said: Beauty, let’s have a meal together after I recover!

Female nurse: I can’t make the decision, you have to ask my boyfriend.

Me: If he’s not here, his life will be affected.

Female nurse: But he is waiting for you in the operating room