How to comfort others

The following is my personal experience, I hope it will help you:

First, look at the object. Different people have different ways to comfort and say different things.

Second, it depends on the situation, such as why he (she) is depressed and unhappy, so as to prescribe the right medicine and avoid inadvertently touching some sensitive words when comforting, which is counterproductive;

Third, be sincere. Since you are willing to comfort him (her), let the other person know that you really want to help him (her), without malice or ridicule or gloating. Try to be sincere and make people trust you.

Fourth, we should give priority to enlightenment, try to talk about some positive and optimistic things, convince each other, give each other a little hope and so on.

How can I comfort others?

1. Listening is not keeping silent, but listening carefully to what the other person said, what he didn't say, and what he really meant.

Listening doesn't mean talking or asking questions; Usually we are eager to share our stories or ask each other questions, thinking that this is the gesture we should listen to. But the so-called listening should be to listen to each other's voice with eyes, ears and heart, and at the same time, don't rush to know the cause and effect of the matter immediately.

We must be willing to let go of our "inner dialogue" for a while. The so-called "inner dialogue" refers to the unconscious dialogue in your mind when you are listening, including thinking about what to say, how to respond to each other's words, or planning the next topic.

2. Pause between conversations, sometimes talking and sometimes listening; When you hear the voice "I don't understand …" in your heart, you should stop and ask the other person "Did I miss something? We must also remind ourselves to slow down the unconscious mechanical reaction. For example, we want to solve each other's anxiety quickly, so without positive thinking, we will jump directly to the stage of taking action-saying or doing something that we think is beneficial to each other. Stopping to think leisurely can make us stop judging, stop reacting and have curiosity.

In this way, it is helpful to show empathy at important moments. If you don't make such a pause, you may say something in an instant that you will regret later. Pause is like a clutch used when driving to shift gears: first slow down to a certain extent, then fasten the gear and then accelerate.

The art of comfort lies in "saying the right thing at the right time" and "not saying the wrong thing on impulse". When friends are not heroes who help others through difficult times, it is not the same as "saving" them from painful situations.

People have the right and responsibility to bear the consequences and difficulties of their actions. We should recognize their pain, let them feel it, and don't try to disperse it quickly.

We are just trying to provide them with a bridge across the river of fear. When friends and family are in emotional or physical pain, the most basic way to support them is to allow them to cry.

In the face of a person who loves to cry, the most natural reaction is to hope that the other person will stop crying and say to him, "Stop crying, things can be solved safely!" " ! In fact, this is not the most appropriate response. When the other person sobs or tears, we usually feel uneasy about our helplessness.

However, crying is a way for the human body to try to expel emotional toxins, while tears are a healing process. So, please don't worry about giving the other person a tissue, just let him know that you support his idea.

4. Giving comfort is not telling others: "You should feel …" or "You shouldn't feel …". People have the right to keep their true feelings.

Comfort means: don't judge them, don't think they are suffering and need help; Comfort means giving them space to be themselves and identify with their feelings. We don't need to "agree or disagree" with their choices or the way to deal with difficulties to express our concern.

Empathy When we are busy helping others, we may forget that people will notice our inner fluctuations-unspoken thoughts and feelings. Although people can't know exactly what we think, we can usually detect whether we are panicking, judging them or feeling sorry for them.

Comfort others face to face has a lot to do with our inner state. Because of their empathy, we should not only share each other's pain, but also endure our own inner suffering.

No matter what the situation, a kind look and comfort are gifts for each other. 6. Waiting for change for a long time will bring a lot of confusion.

No one can quickly correct such a chaotic situation. People need time to adjust, review, change and ask, "What if?" ? "This question.

In the "therapeutic conversation", we learn to accept the fact that our family members, colleagues or neighbors sometimes just need us to be their "ringing boxes" that can be used repeatedly. 7. No matter what the situation is, there is no harm in standing up bravely and being embarrassed by not knowing what to say; It won't hurt to let the people we want to help know how we feel.

You can even honestly say, "I don't know how you feel or what I should say, but I really care about you." Even if you think this expression is ridiculous, you can let the other person know that you are not in a hurry to talk to him now.

You can choose to express your feelings and thoughts in words. In addition to oral expression, there are many different forms of "therapeutic dialogue".

8. Providing practical resources does not need to help others find the answers to all questions, but you can try your best to provide available resources-other friends, experts, friends of friends, to help them find the answers. You can call each other a few times to connect people; You can also find relevant books to show them; Or simply provide an escape space for them to find their own answers calmly.

9. Put yourself in our shoes and ask, "Is there anything I can do to help? Sometimes I have an answer, and sometimes I don't know what kind of help I need. However, people sometimes can't tell their real needs.

Putting yourself in others' shoes is the first step to help others effectively. 10. Make good use of empathy. Even after similar experiences, we can't fully understand other people's feelings, but we can make good use of empathy to care for each other.

Remember to listen to other people's stories patiently before considering whether it is necessary to share yours? And is the result of sharing beneficial to each other? TOP & gt。

How to comfort and care for people?

I believe this should be useful to you!

1. When introducing new friends to your girlfriend, please hug her waist instead of standing by pointing fingers.

2. When you meet a beautiful woman in the street, you can stare for less than 5 seconds and quickly point out the fly in the ointment of that beautiful woman compared with her.

If she has done something wrong, she is already very sad. Please take the initiative to bear the responsibility you should or should not bear.

A man who listens to his girlfriend is sure to succeed, so you should listen to her.

She can bully you, but you must never bully her, because although she bullies you, the first thing she thinks of every time something good happens is you!

6. If she cries at you, you should try your best to coax her until she smiles through tears!

7. Post her photo in your wallet, mobile phone ... all the places you often see.

8. Never leave her for more than ten days.

9. In front of her friends, I hope you can show that you love her more and are more nervous about her than usual.

10. A big man doesn't mean bullying.

1 1. Being gentle doesn't mean having no opinion.

12. Being chic doesn't mean not explaining.

13. Don't always say "whatever" when I ask her questions like "where is better to go" and "what to eat". This is not to say that you are accommodating her, but that you can't bear to talk to her.

14. Always say "I love you" to her, otherwise she will think that you don't love her.

15. Never yell at her in public or leave her alone.

16. It doesn't matter to teach her when she does something wrong, the most important thing is to coax her later.

17. Don't ignore her when you lose your temper. Don't give her time to calm down. Actually, she doesn't need time to calm down at all.

18. You can accompany your friends, but you must value your friends.

19. She watches cartoons. Not only are you not allowed to laugh at her, but you should watch it with her.

20. When she misses you, race against time to find a date with her.

2 1. Look at her eyes intently.

22. The tone is low.

23. Being able to look at other excellent girls objectively, but subjectively think that she is the best.

24. If a girl talks to you, you should hold her hand. If she happens not to be around, please keep your distance from them.

25. Hold her hand when crossing the street.

26. Know how to cherish every minute with her.

No matter how busy you are, don't forget to call every day.

28. Sing her love songs often.

29. Two people have the right to be angry, but not on the same day. If she was angry that day, you can't be angry either.

30. If your girlfriend's life is not smooth, you should be persuasive, help analyze and put forward some constructive solutions.

3 1. Love your girlfriend very much-resolutely support her decision and obey her leadership.

32. Pay attention to other girls for no more than 5 seconds and look at the same girl for no more than 5 times.

Even if people all over the world don't believe her, you should believe her unconditionally. Because she would do the same to you.

She is wearing beautiful clothes, so you should praise her sincerely.

35. It is forbidden to play poverty and discharge in front of women (3 -80 years old). If there is a violation, depending on the seriousness of the case, the girlfriend will crack down severely and quickly. Anyone and any form of sophistry will be regarded as obstructing judicial justice.

36. Don't smoke. Fire as soon as you find out.

37. Don't quarrel with your girlfriend for more than 3 minutes at a time, and the volume should not exceed 20 decibels.

38. Strengthen exercise, keep fit, and carry her to the fifth floor in one breath.

39. When she is in a bad mood and loses her temper, hug her instead of arguing with her.

40. I hope there won't be a phenomenon that her mobile phone is dead and there is no other way to contact you. It would be better if you could call her often and tell her "I miss you" and report her whereabouts at any time.

4 1. She has many shortcomings, which is distressing enough. Please don't remind her at any time.

42. Girlfriend's irrationality is coquetry rather than wildness.

43. She wants to share everything with you. Although you may not understand, I hope you pretend to be listening.

The most important thing is to always think that your girlfriend is right. Because she loves you most.

How to comfort others

There is a lot of content, so I am a little prepared.

. First of all, please remember two points: first, the essence of comfort is the embodiment of love, care and respect; Secondly, the way of comfort should vary from person to person.

It is said that if there is a person who understands the heart to comfort, what is it like? It's really a minute to level the troubles in the world and see the sunshine everywhere! Kang is in treading on thin ice, and Fan and Andy are in Ode to Joy.

. If you have this type of person around you, it is a blessing. It doesn't matter if you don't know him. After reading this, you will be my wife.

Talk about how to comfort people. There are three angles in the process of comfort: emotional level, problem level and action level. Many times, you only need to deal with the emotional layer or the problem layer alone, and you can get it.

However, when you meet some comforters with complicated situations, all three skills may be needed. On the emotional level, our methods include listening, chatting and companionship:/1/ Emotional level ~ Examples of listening Everyone will feel excited, happy and at a low ebb. Maybe I overheard a song and remembered my first love, maybe I was separated from my lover, or I suddenly discovered an unexpected disease. This is the uncertainty of life. I don't know what will happen in the next moment, what emotions will come out, failure, loss, sadness and excitement.

Often at this time, I just want to talk to a living person and vent. Of course, the first choice must be: people who are willing to listen to his stories and understand his pain, right! ! The correct way to comfort such confidants should be to give priority to feelings before dealing with problems.

This requires you to be psychologically prepared for the big trash can, at least remember these three points: 1, don't pick up garbage, and accept it gently. Concentrated eyes, serious expression, follow each other's emotions, sometimes agree with each other, and sometimes sympathize with each other. Only in this way can you arouse the impulse of confidante to vomit, tell his true feelings, complaints and troubles, and regard you as his confidante; On the contrary, if you ask mechanically with a stiff expression, it will make the other person lose the desire to speak.

2. put away the garbage and control yourself. Don't interrupt, don't tell the truth, don't ask the reason, and try not to interrupt each other at will.

Control the impulse to express opinions and comments, some people can't help but spit out their opinions and opinions balabala. Finally, both of them were depressed and didn't want to throw up, but they didn't want to throw up. 3, professional mentality, keep the routine.

A professional trash can, when listening, should add some mood auxiliary words and echoes to show seriousness: Oh, ah, well! Why? That's what happened! Then you should always show your patience and recognition, and the other party will vent their dissatisfaction, unhappiness and unhappiness. At the critical moment, you should use empathy to show that you understand his emotions and thoughts, such as that, it doesn't matter, it's not your problem.

. After the other person vomits one by one, there will be a sense of relief, and you will become a comfort expert in his heart.

Comments: People need to be listened to, especially women. I often hear people say, "I told you I feel much better!" " "So, to comfort people, listening is more important than speaking, and gentle listening to the ears is sometimes more useful than a logically clear brain.

I got dumped. I am really unlucky. For this kind of lovelorn person, we may comfort: "If the old one doesn't go, the new one won't come. If you give up a forest for a tree, you will lose a lot;" Toad with three legs is hard to find, people with two legs are running all over the street, and soon there will be someone suitable for you.

For this kind of comfort seekers, we can generally refer to several directions: comparison, spitting, imagining the future and so on. Sometimes a confidante just doesn't have some ideas. It's good to help him clear his mind through enlightenment and analysis. Sometimes a confidante is just trapped by some emotions, and it is also possible to help him resolve, clarify and let go of this emotion.

Determine whether his symptoms are emotional distress, problem disorder, or both. Of course, this needs to be considered from the other side's perspective. Why is he sad? What are his concerns? 1. contrast: share an example that is worse, more pitiful and worse than him, so as to balance his mentality, guide him to think positively and regain his confidence.

For example, "I am worse than you. I have been dumped eight times! " I get kicked every time I don't understand what's going on! Think about it. "2. When the other person is full of emotions, don't bother to help him analyze the cause and effect of the matter and where the problem lies.

As long as you stand in line and get up the courage to accompany him to vomit and scold your mother, he will miss your supplement, he will dilute your reinforcement, and he will vomit your substitution. After several rounds, the other party will think that you are the Jiaduobao Wang Laoji in his life, and her mood will naturally ease a lot. For example: "33 days of lovelorn love" Wang Xiaojian accompanied Xiaoxian to scold Lu Ran: What do you mean, I was blocked on my way to work and at the door of work, so I changed my letter and didn't answer your phone. You are classical enough, forget it at ordinary times, even if you don't know the law, there is still a chill standing next to her. You are blind! 3. The skill of encouragement lies in affirming each other's strengths, potentials and values, and trusting each other's future performance.

Sometimes small gestures can also convey encouragement, such as staring, nodding, smiling, patting the shoulder and so on. For example: "Struggle" Charlene Marilynn Dangelo encourages Lu Tao: Lu Tao-If I am poor all my life, will you still love me? Charlene Marilynn Dangelo-If you work hard all your life, I will love you even if you are poor.

The premise of enlightenment is that you must have certain life experience and experience, at least a little more than the other party. There are two main points of enlightenment. One is to solve the problem, find the cause of the problem through analysis and examples, and point out the solution.

Say one more word so that the other person can see the problem clearly and understand the method. Sometimes you have to talk, teach, and sometimes you have to criticize and scold. The second is to ease the mood and let the other side out of the predicament through comfort and care. For example, in Struggle, Xu Zhisen inspired Lu Tao: What matters in life is not whether you do well or not.

It went well. It is important that you know when to "brake" and when to adjust yourself. No matter how much money you earn, there are only countless zeros in your life. With a happy family, these zeros are valuable.

If you want to be strong, you must be healthy. Like each other.

How to comfort others

I think this statement upstairs is wrong.

What happened to him? Everyone has shortcomings. People are born.

You can't change it, but he will definitely have an advantage. Landlord, I think we should be so comforted.

Your friends, such as Xiao Li. Xiao Li, don't be sad. As long as you think you have done your best, you can't change anything. I can't blame you for failing the exam. Your father's approach also makes sense. So I think you are happy. Your father also wants you to be a success, which means your father has placed hope on you, you know?

The temporary failure that you can try your best to catch up with next year is nothing, but the final outcome is the most important. You should cheer up. Believe that others can't see your good points, then list his good points, praise him and coax her. Everyone has a little vanity, and he will feel much better if you put him under your leg.

. Here.,,, Thank you.

How to comfort a person?

When comforting others, be skillful.

First of all, we should look at the problem from the standpoint of the comforted;

Second, we must have a sincere heart to help the comforted;

Third, don't preach the truth, because everyone knows the truth, but they just can't do it;

Fourth, you can give more examples or make some metaphors to wake up the comforted;

Fifth, remember not to say what you can't do to comfort others, which is easy to cause disgust;

Sixth, speak in a gentle tone and don't worry. Sometimes, people who try to comfort others will start to feel anxious after seeing that the other person has not improved. While raising their voices, they will relentlessly promise something to broaden each other's hearts, which will only make each other more uneasy;

Seventh, use some things to arouse the gratitude of the comforted person, such as the kindness of the defendant's comfort, or how some people treat him well. When grateful hearts come together, it will be much easier to comfort.

Words to comfort others, words and sentences to comfort others when they are sad.

1. Although things are lost, no matter how precious they are, we are good after all, understand? This is called "staying in the green hills, not afraid of burning without firewood." I hope this will not affect your mood again.

Almost everything has two sides. If you only look at the negative side, you will naturally feel depressed and depressed. Let yourself look at the problem from another angle. On the positive side, it will help you get out of the trough.

3. Make yourself optimistic and happy as soon as possible. As long as your mind changes, so will your body and mind. In that way, you will always get an upward force to make you healthy and full of vitality!

4, no regrets, no disappointment, everything goes with the flow.

I know your troubles, and your mood may be uncomfortable. Do what you are interested in! Slowly forget those annoying things, let the pain and boredom gradually weaken and fade away, and I believe your mood will become cheerful.

6. When you received this message, you also received a girl without sadness and clover from me. No sad girl can make you forget your troubles, and clover can bring you luck and happiness. Smile knowingly, okay?

7. Too beautiful things are never suitable for experience, because once experienced, they can't be forgotten.

8. Make your mood better as soon as possible. You see, even today's sunshine is so bright, and everyone is trying to drive away your worries and anxieties. I hope your gloomy mood will be cheerful at this moment and welcome a better tomorrow!

9. If you like someone, you can be with him, then there will be no tragedy in this world.

10, youth? I just met you on the road, but I didn't know you were leaving soon. Or perhaps, too young love, we are all on the journey of growth, blindly unable to find the direction, stumbling towards the distant. An encounter is a thin and indifferent fate, and a gorgeous opening is endless destruction.

1 1. I'm sorry too. what can I do for you? If you ever need me, just call me, okay? I will accompany you and give you a shoulder to cry on.

12, hate paralyzes life, and love revives it. Hate makes life chaotic, love makes life harmonious. Hate makes life dark, and love makes life dazzling. Friends, let our hearts be filled with love forever!

13. Although "forever" is only a short word, no one can say it completely in words. How far is forever? It will not dissipate with the end of life. The real is always hidden in my heart. Although the sky will change and people will get old, that heart will not change.

14, the lovelorn volcano erupts in your life. You should relax mentally, and then relax. Actually, it's no big deal to be lovelorn. You can't be together anymore. Of course, you should separate. You should be proud of your decision.

15, everyone will inevitably encounter some unpleasant things during the journey. You should learn to adjust yourself, climb mountains and walk in the fields in the suburbs when you have time! Look at the vast and distant sky; Feel the clarity and brightness of the mountain.

16, emotional attachment is the cause of distress. Let go of emotional attachment and you will feel at ease. (classic statement vipyl)

17, I want to tell you that friends will support you silently. If something goes wrong, you will find that I am with you from beginning to end. Be happy!

18, each of us can be knocked down, but no one can stop us from getting up from the ground. Dear friends, let's adjust our mentality, face our inner and outer world positively, and get a new life!

19, some people can only go if they don't come; Some things, you don't want, you have to give up; Some past events, about happiness or pain, can only be buried in my heart; Some people hope that they can only choose to forget the present or the future.

20. When too many thoughts are accumulated, they are as profound as negative redundancy, which will make some distant memories float to the mouth and make people want to listen to them again. Because no one can send it, I can only borrow a pair of ears and tell it to myself.

2 1. The gentle wind blows away your locked brows and lets all your troubles fly back. Please don't go back to chase those troubles that don't belong to you, you have to run forward, because happiness is ahead!

22. If you like a person very much, it is enough to keep your friends at arm's length, which can last a lifetime. Don't expect to get close. Once people have greed, they are doomed to lose it.

23, time will pass, let time flow away your troubles.

24. Heroes are judged by success or failure in life, so you must be strong. If you want to succeed, you can't tolerate cowardice. mollifying remarks

25, people in the journey, everyone will inevitably encounter some unpleasant things, you have to learn to adjust, have time to climb mountains in the suburbs, walk in the fields! Look at the vast and distant sky; Feel the clarity and brightness of the mountain.

How to comfort friends

In this world, everyone can't escape the natural laws of birth, illness, death and illness, so everyone will be sad when they encounter changes. When this happens, no matter how strong people are, they will want to get care and comfort from their relatives and friends and help themselves out of this dark area of life. If your friend is in pain, your silence will only make him feel that you don't care. However, when you are inexperienced in her experience and feel that you don't know how to comfort her, you must not take it for granted to say something in general. You know, this will not only help, but may endanger your friendship and make you lose more than you gain. The advice of the special psychologist of "Fashion Health" is: "In fact, there is no need to say anything, and there is no need for perfect vocabulary and grand philosophy of life. As long as one or two simple words of support for her can break the ice in your friend's heart, let her release the burden in her heart and share her inner feelings with you. "

In a word, the trick to comfort a friend is to give him a shoulder to cry on. Think about what you want to hear in these situations. You must proceed from her true feelings, and you will win a stronger friendship.