There are two kinds of red short messages: original and recommended. I think 10 is the original SMS, and 5 is the classic SMS. Please indicate the classification.

All the people riding white horses are not necessarily princes, but they may be Tang Priest.

You are handsome, and your whole family is handsome.

What's your mother's name?

Fuck, don't curse. ...

Q: Do you think my head is Niu B?

A: Yes!

Clear water means no fish, while lowly people are invincible! _

The following joke is the best to laugh ... wait a minute, let me laugh first ... I can't breathe ... Hahahaha ... It's so funny ... Hahahaha ... Why don't you laugh ... Hahahaha ... Come on!

Mouse: I'm in love with bats now, and children live in the air from now on, so I'm not afraid of your cats. The cat sneered, pointed to the owl in the tree and said, look, she is pregnant with my child!

Mouse: I'm in love with bats now, and children live in the air from now on, so I'm not afraid of your cats. The cat sneered, pointed to the owl in the tree and said, look, she is pregnant with my child!

Pig Bajie was making out with Chang 'e on the moon when suddenly a dark shadow passed by and Pig Bajie hurriedly carried a rake.

After chasing him out, he came back after a while and said, damn it, Yang Liwei. ......

Mr banana is dating his girlfriend and walking down the street. It was very hot, so Mr banana took off his clothes, and then his girlfriend fell down. ...

Cold drinks are sold as new products: "Heartache", a glass of 20 yuan. Curious to buy one, it really hurts: it's just a cup of boiled water!

The little white rabbit met a wolf while walking in the forest. He came up and put two big ear stickers on the little white rabbit and said, "I told you not to wear a hat." The little white rabbit left very grievance.

The next day, she skipped out of the house wearing a hat and met the wolf again. He came up and gave the white rabbit two big mouths and said, "I told you to wear a hat."

Tutu is depressed. After thinking for a long time, I finally decided to complain to the king of the forest, Tiger.

After explaining the situation, the tiger said, "OK, I see. I will handle this matter, so trust the organization." On the same day, the tiger found his partner wolf. "It is wrong for you to do so. This is very difficult for me. " Then he wiped the dust off the table: "Do you think this will work?" You can say, Tutu, come and find me a piece of meat! She found the fat one, and you said you wanted the thin one. She found a thin one, and you said you wanted a fat one. So you can hit her. Of course, you can also say that. Tutu, come and find me a woman. She found plump ones, and you said you liked slim ones. She found a slim one, and you said you liked the plump one. You can beat her. It is both reasonable and powerful. "The wolf nodded and clapped his hands, and the reverence for the tiger once again reached a new peak. Unexpectedly, the above instructions were heard by the little white rabbit who was weeding the tiger's house outside the window. I hate this in my heart.

The next day, the little white rabbit went out again. What a coincidence! It's the big bad wolf coming. The wolf said, "Tutu, come and find me a piece of meat." Tutu said, "So, do you want to be fat or thin?" The wolf listened, his heart sank and he was happy again. He said, fortunately, there is a plan B. He added, "Tutu, Mary, find me a woman." Tutu asked, "So, do you like plump or slim?" The wolf was silent for 2 seconds and raised his hand to give Tutu two big ear stickers. "Shit, I told you not to wear a hat."

The story of two psychopaths

It is said that two mental patients managed to escape from the mental hospital.

But when you get out of the door, you have to climb over the wall of 100 to reach the expressway.

They climbed 60 walls together. One of them was mentally ill and asked the other, "Are you tired, man?"

The other replied that he was not tired.

He said that it was very tiring. Let's keep turning.

When turning to the 99th wall, a psychopath asked another psychopath, "Are you tired, man?"

The other replied, "I'm tired! Let's go back! "

So they returned it. ......

Chu Xiang Yang: I failed the arithmetic exam today.

Dad: Why?

Chu Yangxiang: The teacher asked me what 2×3 was, and I said 6.

Dad: That's right!

Chu Xiang Yang: The teacher asked me how much 3x2 equals.

Dad: What the fuck's the difference!

Chu Xiang Yang: That's what I said.

It is said that a little boy rushed to the police station and said to the police: no, no, my father had a fight with his neighbor! Go now! Or someone will die! The policeman asked: When did it start? Almost half an hour. "Then why didn't you report earlier?" Dad always got the upper hand just now, and now I think he's going to suffer!

Barry: I seem to be in love with a dog.

Fairy: What? A male dog?

Barry: Of course it's a bitch! You think I'm a pervert?

Abby and Artie went to the bar and got drunk. There are only two female guests in it. Abby, the leader, suddenly jumped out and whispered to Artie.

He said, "Let's go! I can't believe my wife and mistress are in there. " Ah di probe a look, and his face changed way:

"Strange! My wife and mistress are also in it. 」

Once upon a time, two people lived on both sides of the river. They have bad ears, but they are polite. One morning,

People in Hexi saw people in Hedong go out with sickles and shouted at each other: Hey! I said, are you going to mow the grass? river

When Dongfang saw Xihe shouting at him, knowing that he was concerned about what he was going to do, he shouted, Oh, no, I'm going to cut it.

Grass! Seeing the people on the other side of the river shouting at him, he knew that the other side had answered himself and said politely, Oh, yes.

Really, I thought you were mowing the grass!

An American hacker threatened to hack a China website, but as soon as he opened the webpage, he got four or five viruses …

Women are so ugly that they will never get married, hoping to be trafficked. One day, her dream finally came true and she was kidnapped. The kidnapper thought she was ugly and sent her home. The woman insisted on not getting off the bus, and the kidnapper leader gritted his teeth and stamped his feet and said, fuck, let's go! No car! !

1. Title: Although .........

Child: He took off his clothes and put on his trousers.

Teacher's comment: Is he going to take it off? Still have to wear it?

2. Title: Among them

Children: I hurt my left foot.

Teacher's comment: Are you a centipede?

3. Title: One by one

Child: After work, Dad goes home one after another.

Teacher's comment: How many dads do you have?

4. Theme: Sadness

Child: There is a ditch in front of my house, which is really sad.

Teacher's comment: The teacher is even sadder.

5. Title: Once again

Child: My mother is short, tall, fat and thin.

Teacher's comment: Is your mother a deformed diamond?

6. Title: Look.

Children: What are you looking at? Never seen it?

Teacher's comment: Don't procrastinate too much.

7. title: prosperity

Children write: bustling confession.

Teacher's comment: Don't watch too many series!

8. Title: Delicious

Children write: delicious fart.

Teacher: .........

9. Title: Innocence

The child wrote: It's really hot today.

Teacher's comment: You are so naive.

10. Title: Sure enough

The children said: I ate fruit yesterday. Then I drank cold water.

Teacher's comment: a sentence that cannot be separated.

1 1. theme: first ... then ... example: eat first, then take a bath.

Children: Goodbye, sir!

Teacher's comments: .................

12. Title: In addition,

Child: A train passes by, besides, besides.

Teacher's comment: forget it if I die.

10 A name that administrators can't stand.

1 "I don't know"

Whistleblower: "Administrator, someone uses a plug-in, and I report it."

Administrator: "Who?"

Whistleblower: "I don't know."

Administrator: "-Get out-"

"It's me"

Whistleblower: "Administrator, someone uses a plug-in, and I report it."

Administrator: "OK, who is it?"

Whistleblower: "That's me."

Administrator: "Very good, all of you, seal!" " "

Whistleblower: "-Help!"

3 "Please wait"

Whistleblower: "Administrator, someone uses a plug-in, and I report it."

Administrator: "Report again, who?"

Whistleblower: "Please wait a moment."

Manager: "OK, hurry up."

A minute later

Administrator: "Who is it?"

Whistleblower: "Please wait a moment."

Administrator: "I'll wait for you."

4 "Not me."

Whistleblower: "Administrator, someone uses a plug-in, and I report it."

Administrator: "Who is it?"

Whistleblower: "Not me."

Administrator: "Who is that?"

Whistleblower: "Not me."

Administrator: "You are talking nonsense, not who are you?"

Whistleblower: "Really, it's not me."

Administrator: "Fuck you."

5 "Hee hee hee"

Whistleblower: "Administrator, someone uses a plug-in, and I report it."

Administrator: "Report again. Tell me who it is. "

Whistleblower: "Hee hee hee."

Administrator: "Who's calling, please?"

Whistleblower: "Hee hee hee."

Administrator: "Somebody, call the mental hospital."

6 "I am your father."

Whistleblower: "Administrator, someone uses a plug-in, and I report it."

Administrator: "Who! ? "

Whistleblower: "I am your father."

Administrator: "I'm your grandfather."

7 "I lied to you"

Whistleblower: "Administrator, someone uses a plug-in, and I report it."

Librarian: "Give me your name."

Whistleblower: "I lied to you."

Administrator: "I have nothing to do when I am full." Go home and drink milk. "

8 "I am dead"

Whistleblower: "Administrator, someone uses a plug-in, and I report it."

Administrator: "Boy, I've been played all day. If you report a false case, I will kill you. Tell me who it is! "

Whistleblower: "I am dead."

Administrator: "You-what's the trouble if you die? Come to me when you are alive. "

9 "Administrator"

Whistleblower: "Administrator, someone uses a plug-in, and I report it."

Administrator: "Say it! ! ! "

Whistleblower: "Administrator."

Administrator: "Is it necessary for me to use a plug-in? Ruin you! "

10 "I won't say anything until I'm killed."

Whistleblower: "Administrator, someone uses a plug-in, and I report it."

Administrator: "Come on! ! ! ! ! "

Whistleblower: "I will not say anything until I die."

Administrator: "You-you have nothing to do when you are full, get out!" " "

A group of animals crossed the river until the boat in the middle of the river began to enter the water, and some of them had to go into the water.

The clever monkey came up with an idea for everyone to tell a joke. If the joke doesn't make everyone laugh, he must throw the speaker into the water.

So we began to draw lots, and the result was that the cat was the first, followed by the monkey and the chicken. . .

The cat tried to tell a joke, and everyone laughed except the pig. But the animals had to throw the cat into the water.

The monkey's jokes make people laugh their heads off, but the pig still doesn't laugh, and the monkey has to feed the fish.

Chickens are afraid, even the cleverest monkeys can't escape this fate. . .

Unexpectedly, the pig smiled at this time, and all the animals said strangely, why did you laugh before the chicken spoke?

The pig said, the cat joke is really funny. . .

2. I said that day, "You are a pig." You said, "I am a pig." So from now on, I will call you "pig"! Finally, one day, you can't bear to shout in front of everyone: "I'm not a pig!" " "

The ugly man sent ninety-nine roses to his beautiful female colleague.

Marry me! I love you!

Woman: Forget it! I have no feelings for you.

Man: Please tell me that's not good, and I'll replace it.

W: What do you like about me? I changed

One day, Xiao Qiang asked his father, Dad, am I a stupid boy? Dad said: silly child, how can you be a silly child?

Thief A: Count how much money was robbed today? Thief B: No, just read the newspaper tomorrow.

Stand higher and pee farther.

Mom: Everything goes up, such as water, electricity, gas and air pollution. Son: There is always something to go down! Mom: What about my humorous and clever son? Son: Look at my report card.

Mouse: I'm in love with bats now, and children live in the air from now on, so I'm not afraid of your cats. The cat sneered, pointed to the owl in the tree and said, look, she is pregnant with my child!

People don't attack me, I don't attack; If people offend me, comity three points; If people force me again, I'll give you an injection; People still attack me and kill the grass.

I allow you to walk into my world, but I don't allow you to walk around in my world.

3, Ming Sao is easy to hide and hard to prevent.

4. The sky didn't fall on me, so it broke my heart and hurt my bones and muscles.

5, holding the child's hand, I know that the child is ugly and full of tears. If the child doesn't leave, I will leave.

6, red beans don't grow in the south, they grow on my face, I really miss it!

7. I am convinced that a person will come to this world because of my torture.

8. Journey to the West tells us that monsters with backgrounds are all picked up, and those without backgrounds are killed with a stick.

9. What are you unhappy about? Say it to make everyone happy.

10, I like you so much. If you like me, you will die.

My mother asked me if I had a boyfriend, and I said no. My mother said: I can have this, and I said: I really don't have this ~ ~ ~

A mental patient ran out of the hospital and kidnapped a young man with a real gun. He asked the young man, "1+ 1=?" The young man thought for a moment and said nervously. . . . "As a result, he killed the young man. Why do you ask? Oh, before killing the young man, he said to him, "You know too much ..."