Find some short messages about rabbits,

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1. A bear is defecating in the Woods, and a rabbit comes. He asked the rabbit, "Has it lost its hair?" The rabbit thought for a moment and said, "Don't lose hair! The bear took a cigarette and asked, "Will it lose its hair?" The rabbit looked at the bear and said, "Don't lose your hair!" " The bear looked at the rabbit suspiciously and asked, "Really don't shed hair?" The rabbit shouted impatiently, "If you don't lose your hair, you won't lose it!"! ! ! "After his words, the bear grabbed the rabbit and said …" Sorry, I forgot my paper. "

The giraffe said, "Little Rabbit, I hope you know how good it is to have a long neck. No matter what I eat, I will slowly pass through my long neck, and that kind of delicious food can be enjoyed for a long time. "

The little white rabbit looked at him without expression.

"Also, in summer, cold water slowly flows through my long neck, which is delicious. What a long neck! White rabbit, can you imagine? "

The white rabbit said slowly, "Have you ever vomited?"

3. One day, a kangaroo was driving on a country road, and suddenly he saw a small white rabbit in the middle of the road, with his ears and body almost lying on the ground, as if listening to something …

So .. Kangaroo stopped the car and asked curiously, "What are you listening to, Little White Rabbit?"

"A big truck passed by here half an hour ago ..."

"Wow .. so God! .. how do you know? .."

"He XX! That's how my neck and legs are broken .. "

The ant was walking in the forest and suddenly met an elephant. The ant burrowed into the soil and stretched out a leg.

The little white rabbit was curious and asked, What are you doing?

The ant whispered to it:

Shh ... don't make a sound, watch me trip. ...

One day, the rabbit was writing in front of a cave, and a wolf came up and asked, "Rabbit, what are you writing?"

The rabbit replied, "I'm writing a paper."

The wolf asked again, "What topic?"

The rabbit replied, "I'm writing about how rabbits eat wolves."

The wolf laughed and said he didn't believe it.

The rabbit said, "Come with me." Then he took it into the cave and the rabbit continued to write in front of the cave. Then another fox came over and asked, "Rabbit, what are you writing?"

The rabbit replied, "I'm writing a paper."

The fox asked, "What topic?"

The rabbit replied, "How does the rabbit eat the fox?"

The fox laughed after hearing this, expressing disbelief.

The rabbit said, "Come with me." Then he took it into the cave. After a while, the rabbit went out of the cave alone and continued to write his paper.

At this time, in the cave, a lion was sitting on a pile of bones and picking his teeth, while reading the rabbit's paper: the ability of an animal is not determined by its strength, but by who is the boss behind it.

6. One day, the white rabbit ran to the drugstore and asked the boss, "Boss, do you have any carrots here?" "

The boss said, "No."

The little white rabbit is gone.

The next day, the little white rabbit ran to the drugstore and asked the boss, "boss, do you have any carrots here?" "

The boss said, "I told you, no!" " "

The little white rabbit is gone.

On the third day, the white rabbit ran to the drugstore and asked the boss, "boss, do you have any carrots here?" "

The boss is anxious: "How many times have I told you? ! Don't! ! ! If you bother me again, I'll clamp your teeth with tiger pliers

Unplug them all! "

The little white rabbit was frightened and ran away.

On the fourth day, the white rabbit ran to the drugstore and asked the boss, "Boss, do you have tiger pliers here?" "

The boss said, "No."

The little white rabbit asked, "Well, do you have any carrots?" "

The boss was really angry, took out the tiger pliers and pulled out all the teeth of the little white rabbit.

On the fifth day, the white rabbit ran to the drugstore and asked the boss, "Boss, do you have carrot juice here?" "

7. The white rabbit and the big bear squatted under the tree and shit.

Bear said to the white rabbit, although you white rabbits are good-looking, you are in trouble! You can tell when it's dirty. That's disgusting!

The little white rabbit said, look at what you said! Isn't it?

Bear said, yes! Bear said as he grabbed the white rabbit and wiped his ass and walked away.

……

8. The white rabbit and the big bear were walking in the forest and accidentally kicked over a jar.

An elf came out of the pot and said that he could satisfy their three wishes.

The bear said, turn it into the strongest bear in the world. Its wish has come true.

The little white rabbit said, give it a small helmet. Its wish has also come true.

The bear said, turn it into the most beautiful bear in the world. Its wish has come true again.

The little white rabbit said, give it a bike. Its wish has come true again.

The bear said, turn all other bears in the world into bitches!

The little white rabbit got on the bike and said as he ran, turn this bear into a homosexual. ...

10. The little white rabbit skipped to the bakery and asked, "Boss, do you have a hundred buns?"

Boss: "Oh, sorry, not that much."

"well. . . "The little white rabbit left in dismay.

The next day, the little white rabbit skipped to the bakery. "Boss, do you have a hundred steamed buns?"

Boss: "Sorry, there is still no"

"well. . . "The little white rabbit left in dismay again.

On the third day, the little white rabbit skipped to the bakery. "Boss, do you have a hundred steamed buns?"

The boss said happily, "Yes, yes, we have a hundred buns today! ! "

The little white rabbit took out the money: "Great, I'll buy two!" " "

1 1. There is a white rabbit running happily in the forest.

On the way, it met a giraffe who was rolling marijuana.

The white rabbit said to the giraffe, "Giraffe Giraffe, why did you do something that hurt yourself?"

Look at how beautiful this forest is. Let's run in nature together! "

The giraffe looked at the marijuana and the white rabbit and threw it behind him.

Running in the forest with rabbits.

Later, they met an elephant who was about to take cocaine.

The white rabbit said to the elephant, "elephant, elephant, why do you want to do something that hurts yourself?"

Look at how beautiful this forest is. Let's run in nature together! "

The elephant looked at the cocaine and the white rabbit and threw the cocaine behind him.

Running in the forest with rabbits and giraffes.

Later, they met a lion who was about to kill a poisonous snake.

The white rabbit said to the lion, "Lion, lion, why do you want to do something that hurts yourself?"

Look at how beautiful this forest is. Let's run in nature together! "

The lion looked at the syringe and the white rabbit and threw the syringe behind him.

Rushed over and gave the white rabbit a good beating.

The elephant and giraffe trembled with fear: "Why did you hit the white rabbit?"

It is so kind, cares about our health and makes us close to nature. "

The lion said angrily, "This son of a bitch pulls me every time he eats ecstasy."

Running around the forest like an idiot. "

12. On the first day, the little white rabbit went fishing by the river and went home without catching anything.

The next day, the little white rabbit went fishing by the river again, but found nothing and went home.

On the third day, the little white rabbit just arrived at the river, and a big fish jumped out of the river and shouted at the little white rabbit:

If you use carrots as fucking bait again, I'll kill you!

13. In order to test the strength of the police in the United States, Hongkong and Chinese mainland, the United Nations put three rabbits in three forests.

Let's see who finds the rabbit first.

Before the first forest was discovered by American police. They first spent half a day meeting to make a battle plan and strictly divide the work, and then

Special forces were sent to the forest for a carpet search, and the meeting was postponed. The rabbit ran away and the mission failed!

Then it was the turn of the Hong Kong police. They sent 100 people and dozens of police cars to line up outside the forest for the leaders to use.

The trumpet shouted "Rabbit, Rabbit, you are surrounded, come out and surrender ..." Half a day passed, but nothing happened. Fly.

The tiger went into the forest and searched again. There was no result and the mission failed!

Finally, there are only four policemen in China. First, they played mahjong all day. At dusk, a man walked into the forest with a baton. It didn't take five minutes.

Hearing the screams of the animals in the forest, the police in China were smoking, talking and laughing and dragging behind.

Seeing a black and blue bear, the bear was dying and said, "Stop fighting, I'm a rabbit ..."

15. Three white rabbits picked a mushroom.

The two big ones let the small one get some wild vegetables to eat together.

The younger one said I wouldn't go. If I leave, you will eat my mushrooms.

The two older ones said no and went ~ ~ ~

Half a year has passed, and the white rabbit hasn't come back yet. The big one can't come back. Let's eat.

The other big one said wait ~ ~ ~

A year has passed and the white rabbit hasn't come back yet. Don't wait for us to eat.

Just then, the little white rabbit suddenly jumped out of the nearby jungle and said angrily, Look! I know you want to eat my mushrooms.

There is a white rabbit running happily in the forest. On the way, it met a giraffe who was rolling marijuana.

The white rabbit said to the giraffe, "Giraffe Giraffe, why did you do something that hurt yourself?" Look at how beautiful this forest is. Let's run in nature together! "

The giraffe looked at the marijuana and the white rabbit, threw the marijuana behind her and ran with the white rabbit in the forest.

Later, they met an elephant who was about to take cocaine.

The white rabbit said to the elephant, "elephant, elephant, why do you want to do something that hurts yourself?" Look at how beautiful this forest is. Let's run in nature together! "

The elephant looked at the cocaine and the white rabbit, threw the cocaine behind him and ran in the forest with the white rabbit and giraffe.

Then they met a lion who was going to fight heroin.

The white rabbit said to the lion, "Lion, lion, why do you want to do something that hurts yourself?" Look at how beautiful this forest is. Let's run in nature together! "

The lion looked at the syringe and the white rabbit, threw the syringe behind him and rushed over to beat the white rabbit hard.

The elephant and giraffe trembled with fear: "Why did you hit the white rabbit?" It is so kind, cares about our health and calls us to be close to nature. "

The lion said angrily, "This bastard rabbit drags me around the forest like an idiot every time he eats ecstasy."

The white rabbit and the blind bear were walking in the forest and accidentally kicked over a jar.

An elf came out of the pot and said that he could satisfy their three wishes.

The blind bear said: Turn it into the strongest bear in the world. Its wish has come true.

The little white rabbit said, give it a small helmet. Its wish has also come true.

The blind bear said: Turn it into the most beautiful bear in the world. Its wish has come true again.

The little white rabbit said, give it a bike. Its wish has come true again.

The blind bear said: Turn all other bears in the world into bitches!

The little white rabbit got on the bike and said as he ran, turning the bear into a homosexual.

2. Arithmetic problems

Teacher: If I give you two rabbits, Billy gives you two rabbits, Mary gives you two rabbits, and finally you get one.

How many rabbits are there?

Tom: Seven.

Teacher: No, say it again. Listen carefully this time. I gave you two rabbits and Billy gave you two rabbits.

Son, Mary gave you two rabbits. How many rabbits did you finally raise?

Tom: Seven.

Teacher: That's still not right. Let me put it another way. If I give you two pigeons, Billy gives you two pigeons.

Son, Mary will give you two more pigeons. How many pigeons will there be in the end?

Tom: Six.

Teacher: OK! Now let's go back to the question just now: if I give you two rabbits, Billy will give you two.

Rabbits, Mary gave you two rabbits. How many rabbits did you finally raise?

Tom: Seven.

Teacher: What's the matter with you? Aren't rabbits and pigeons the same?

Tom: No, I already have a rabbit at home.

19. One day, the little white rabbit MM went out to play and got lost when she came home. She came to a fork in the road, and a little gray rabbit happened to come over.

The white rabbit sister asked, "Brother Grey Rabbit, my sister is lost.". Can you tell me how to get there? " Seeing that the white rabbit's sister was single, the grey rabbit said maliciously, "Do you want to know?"

The white rabbit said, "Of course you want to know. Come on. "

Grey rabbit said, "You want to know, just make me happy!" " " .

So the white rabbit made the gray rabbit happy. After that, the gray rabbit pointed to the left and the white rabbit walked forward.

After a while, the white rabbit came to a fork in the road. what can I do? Here comes another little black rabbit. So the white rabbit sister asked, "Brother Black Rabbit, my sister is lost. Can you tell me how to get there? "

Seeing that the white rabbit's sister was single, the black rabbit said with malicious intent, "Do you want to know?" The white rabbit said, "Of course you want to know. Come on. "

The black rabbit said, "Let me be happy if you want to know!" " .

So, the white rabbit made the black rabbit happy. After that, the gray rabbit pointed to the left and the white rabbit walked forward. The white rabbit went home. Soon after, she gave birth to a litter of rabbits. Can you guess what color the rabbit is?

(Answer: Do you want to know? If you want to know, please make your brother happy first! ~ ~ hehe)

This is very interesting and not suitable for texting. )

Don't annoy the rabbit.

The beginning of the matter is this:

One of my cousins had to work overtime on Sunday. Her cousin took a driver's license test that day, so she sent her 5-year-old son to my house and asked me to look after him for one day.

I was afraid of disobedience, so I went to the market and bought him a lovely little white rabbit.

Ask me what the rabbit eats, and I will tell him to eat carrots and all the green vegetables. I had a good time with the rabbit and went to read a book.

The rabbit soon finished eating the carrots, and when it was noisy, it went to the refrigerator to find vegetables. Who knows that only a part of the peppers in my refrigerator are green? If you make a scene, break the pepper and feed it to the rabbit.

The rabbit won't eat, but it will eat when it quarrels. The little white rabbit was forced to hurry and kicked his feet wildly, so he pushed the fine sand spread in his nest into his noisy eyes. I was busy rubbing it with my hands. His hands were burning, and I burst into tears.

I heard him crying badly in the study, so I rushed out and asked him what was wrong. He covered his eyes with his hand and kept crying: "The rabbit kicked me, and the rabbit kicked me."

I thought the rabbit really kicked him in the eye. I was scared to death. I thought, if there is a mistake, how should I tell his parents? Busy calling 120.

Then the doorbell rang. I opened the door and saw that it was my brother's classmate. I didn't have time to say hello to him, so I ran back to comfort him. I didn't pay attention to stepping on a piece of watermelon skin he threw around and knocked my head on the door frame and fainted.

My brother's classmates quickly dialed 120, and then remembered some first aid knowledge they learned during military training. They knelt on the ground and tried to pick me up.

At this time, my brother came back. When he saw this scene, he thought that his classmates were going to flirt with me, so he picked up one of his mother's pointed shoes and shone it on the unlucky man's head. Suddenly, blood gushed out.

When the younger brother rushed into the kitchen and took the knife, his classmates tried to explain and ran downstairs desperately.

At this time, Grandma Wang downstairs heard screams and looked out from the peephole of the security door. She saw a man running down with blood all over his face, and his brother was chasing after him with a knife. She was frightened and immediately called 1 10 to call the police.

Originally, she had a slight stroke. In this panic, her hands and feet are even more clumsy. She suddenly sat on the ground and put positive pressure on the kitten's tail.

The kitten jumped out with a sigh, knocked over a pot of soup, and flames scurried around. Grandma Wang picked up a bottle of water and poured it over, but it contained Erguotou that her wife had secretly hidden. So, while putting out the fire, the whole family called the 1 19 fire alarm.

When my brother's classmate ran as fast as he could, he was bumping into an emergency doctor who was walking upstairs. As both sides were in a hurry, they rolled into a ball and fell down the stairs.

At this time, my brother's classmates explained everything to him. But two doctors broke their arms.

After waking up, I called my cousin and brother-in-law. Cousin is drinking water Hearing the news, she choked in her throat and rolled her eyes at once.

Her colleague is busy typing120; When my cousin heard the news, he drove frantically to my house and ran three red lights.

At this time, two ambulances and two fire engines have gathered downstairs in my house. The fireman was about to turn on the fire hydrant when his cousin's car suddenly came and hit it. Suddenly, the water flowed like a river. He turned the steering wheel again and ran into a police car that had just arrived.

And in the back, several traffic policemen riding motorcycles are galloping, and then behind, it is the municipal facilities to repair the car.

That day, it was like a Hollywood blockbuster playing downstairs in my house. According to statistics, only five ambulances were dispatched. I called one, my brother and classmates called one, two injured doctors called one, and my cousin's colleague called one. ...

You said you were missing one? Don't worry, didn't my cousin come back from his driving school? The old coach in the car was so scared that he had another heart attack. Don't you need to order another one?