A collection of funny short messages sent by friends

The hot girl called a taxi. Miss, what will you wear in the future? Spice Girl: Red miniskirt! Recipient: Then where to go? Spice Girl: It's thighs!

Hungry, I can't resist your temptation. When I was in close contact with you, you gave me an indescribable feeling that the earth was spinning. I really want to have a big fight with you, but I'm afraid of getting pregnant ... dear beer.

Men's comments: Miss Pao should be elegant, have hardness on the bed, show the length of undressing pants, touch the humidity carefully, pursue depth, want to master the speed comfortably, lift hard and leave the temperature * * *!

Motto of new women: hard work and plain living, underwear! Polite, no bra! Five stresses and four beauties, open your thighs! Learn from Lei Feng and betray your husband! Keep pace with the times and get it done at any time! Running towards a well-off society is * * *!

A woman urinated in the toilet, and a drunk went by mistake after drinking. Hearing the sound of urinating, she quickly said, don't pour it, I really don't drink it! The woman was so frightened that she didn't dare to pee any more. She couldn't hold back and farted. The drunkard said, * * *, why open another bottle!

Career is like flying, work is like a wedding night, achievement is like a child's penis, wealth is like an increasing income, and people are like an old lady.

I am the oak tree in front of your window, the book at hand when I shed tears for the first time, the candle you watch in the spring night, and the beautiful clothes you wear in autumn (don't freeze in cold weather)!

I can't miss you if there is no moon; If there is no sun, I can not care about you. But how can I forget you because of the reincarnation of the sun and the moon!

Rice is a mother or a flower because of peanuts. Amy's father is a butterfly because she likes flowers recently. Amy's grandmother is a wonderful pen, because wonderful pen gives birth to flowers, and Amy's grandfather is popcorn, because he reported Amy holding flowers. Who is Naomi's husband? (Mice, because mice love rice)

I looked at your sexy body that day, twisted in front of me and gently stroked your skin. I can't resist your temptation: boss, I want this fish!

You are happy because I am happy, I am happy because you are happy, I am sad because you are thin, I am thin because you are sick, I smile because you are strong, and I am rich because I sold you. .................................................................................................

I was nervous the first time. He always let me relax gently, and then he stuck me in my body. There is blood, and the pain is speechless. I just realized … blood donation is like this!