How about a boy who is willing to send greeting messages to girls every day for three years?

The reader asked:

Every day, a man sends a message to a woman, having three meals in the morning, noon and evening, calling and sending messages before and after meals, and talking on the phone for more than half an hour before going to bed every night.

It's been three years without interruption. Does a man really love that woman?

Shan Ge replied:

Many times, there are many levels to judge whether a man really loves a woman, for example, whether he is willing to spend money for her; Willing to do things for each other that you don't like; Can you think from each other's point of view, consider each other's feelings and so on.

Sending messages and making phone calls every day is only one aspect, even a very elementary aspect.

Therefore, as far as testing a man's true love is concerned, it depends not only on this virtual "communication", but also on getting along face to face.

Of course, for a man, sending messages and calling a woman for three years in a row is also a test of his patience. Just to see under what circumstances.

For example, a man especially likes a woman, which is the feeling of love at first sight. There is no substantive communication, but there is a hazy goodwill that he can't stop. This kind of communication is actually untrue, just like between men and women in online dating. If you don't meet, even if you talk for ten years, what can you prove?

He may just be obsessed with the feeling of self-imagination and beautiful illusion, and once he enters reality, it may be another scene.

If, under the premise of this kind of communication, this man and this woman have been in contact with each other for a long time in reality, they may be cooked with raw rice and know each other's advantages and disadvantages, but for some reason, they have to fall in love in a long distance, or they may be separated. If the man can still send messages and call women every day, year after year, it shows that he really loves this woman.

Otherwise, it is likely to be a hormonal-driven abnormal motivation.

So in this case, it is better to analyze the specific problems.

02

The reader asked:

Is it possible for a long-distance relationship to last?

Shan Ge replied:

For those men and women who truly love each other, age is never an obstacle, and time is never a distance.

In the end, the reason why two people seem to be defeated by ruthless distance is not the distance of space, but the connection between hearts has never been established.

The ancients said that two kinds of feelings should last for a long time, can they be sooner or later? Those men and women who are tired of being together all day may not be able to go to the end, and those men and women who are in different places may not be able to make a positive result.

Therefore, long-distance love itself is an emotional test, which depends on whether the other party can accept the test, whether it can endure the pain of lovesickness and loneliness, and whether two people consume spirit or hormones.

03

The reader asked:

How many people in this society can marry their first love?

Shan Ge replied:

In this era, probably not many marriages can be completed through the first love of each other. Presumably, I won't say why, and everyone knows it.

It may be an exaggeration to say that this is an era of keen love games, but it is probably not an exaggeration to say that many people are happy to enjoy love fast food.

Yes, today's love is more or less contaminated with fast food culture!

I say this, not to deny the beauty of the first love that many people have. I just feel that the current era pays more attention to the feeling of autonomy in treating marriage and love.

The society is developing and the times are progressing! Now it is estimated that no one will think that "love without marriage purpose is hooliganism" Everyone will think that love is love and marriage is marriage, and they don't want to confuse the two, so they will feel very tired.

Well, sometimes, talking about a hearty first love with the mentality of only asking and cultivating without asking for gains may really yield the desired results.

So maybe more people will think it's normal that the first love is not successful. First love is sometimes used to make each other grow up. As Zhao Benshan once said in a sketch: First love doesn't understand love! But that doesn't mean you can't enjoy this love first.