Gold medal mediation: I no longer believe in love?

I have seen many other people's stories on the show, and every family has a difficult story to read. Today, I will tell my story, my marriage.

He and I were 2 1 years old that year. We met, knew each other and fell in love. At the age of 22, he took me to his hometown (Gansu) to meet my parents. From the beginning, his parents thought I was not good enough for their son, but I was stupid and had no idea at all.

At that time, I was too ignorant to understand marriage. I don't understand that marriage has something to do with two other big families.

My hometown is in Hubei. At that time, my parents didn't approve of my marrying away from home, but I had a strong desire not to marry him. When I got married, I only had a wedding here in Hubei, and none of the men attended our wedding.

Having said that, I realize that my marriage was a wrong start from the beginning.

After marriage, I got pregnant and had our lovely son. When our son was about to be born, I was lying in bed with a terrible stomachache. At this time, their family still told me to divorce after giving birth. At that time, I thought that as long as the father of the child loved me, it was enough to protect me all the time. Their whole family is not afraid to oppose me and will not shake my determination to live a good life with him!

But he did love me then! At least I think so. After the baby was born, our family of three rented a house. I took care of the baby at work, and everything was calm and stable.

But when my son was 4 years old, his heart was completely out of this family. He cheated on me that year, which was nothing but a fatal blow to me. I suddenly felt helpless in a foreign land. I didn't handle it well at that time. I went to Wuhan to look for a job alone.

When I was working in Wuhan, I was not completely disappointed with him. I think as long as he repents and turns over a new leaf, I can choose to forgive him. I have been expecting him to change his mind. He will contact me and come to Wuhan to admit his mistake. But that was two years, and neither he nor his family called me for two years.

Finally, I really miss my children. I called him on my own initiative that day. I remember I called him and said I gave him my divorce certificate, and he agreed. A few days later, he came to Wuhan and we went to the Civil Affairs Bureau. We didn't know what our marriage certificate was like at first. The Civil Affairs Bureau said that we can't handle the divorce procedure here, and that we can only handle it at the place where we handle the marriage certificate. It seems that the Civil Affairs Bureau in Gansu was not linked to the national system at that time, and then we didn't handle the divorce certificate in Hubei.

After coming back, we went to Gansu to get a divorce certificate. His attitude changed when we got there. He said that he was determined to repent and turn over a new leaf, live a good life in the future and work together in Wuhan. I foolishly chose to believe him, thinking that he was the only child in my family. I said that as long as you handle the relationship with other women and make a complete break, I will still give you a chance. I still think that if he goes to Wuhan with me, his parents will not accept me. So I resigned and went to Gansu.

But what I didn't expect was that he let me down so much that he didn't deal with things outside at all. That woman keeps calling every day. When we were together two years later, I didn't feel as warm and strange as before.

I was born less than a month ago. On the way back that night, he and his friends went out for a drink, and even the car fell from nowhere, causing a comminuted fracture of his right foot. After several months of surgery and hospitalization, I took good care of him. I didn't expect him to go to that woman on the first day of walking on crutches. When he came back, he told me that the woman would wait for him until he got married.

He also said something that I didn't understand at all. He said I was his sworn enemy, and something happened to him as soon as I got back. At that time, when he said such a thing, I completely felt that he was hopeless and ungrateful.

Maybe everything I do is my own will in his eyes, and I take it for granted that I am good to him. That time I made up my mind to leave him, and I filed for divorce. He didn't agree. He said that he agreed to divorce when his son awarded it to him. I just wanted to leave him as soon as possible, so I agreed to divorce. After the divorce, I went back to Wuhan.

Their families all support our divorce. It should be said that they have been expecting our divorce for a long time. He himself told me that his family didn't approve of my coming back. I was not accepted from beginning to end, mainly because I was too short for their son. I 150cm, he 180cm, the most cute height difference!

Before, I thought my height really didn't match him, but now, I don't think he matches me. How can a man who has no sense of responsibility and responsibility be a father and husband?

I finally escaped from this nightmare place, but I can't stop having children. I will go to see the children once every two years. Sometimes I want to take my children to play in Hubei during the summer vacation, but they never agree. Usually, I call my children, and my grandfather also has a lot of complaints, saying that my children's poor grades are because I call them to distract them.

So now I can't call the children, I can only go to Gansu to see the children by myself.

In the first month of this year, I went to see the children there, and their families surrounded me every day to talk about remarriage, which I didn't expect. Later, I asked my son to tell me that I slept with my son that night. My son said to me, "Mom, give dad another chance." This is my biggest worry. The child is innocent. I don't want to put too much pressure on my children. His childhood was not happy. I said, "Mom doesn't want to promise your father. You will understand when you grow up. " . Now the child 1 1 year old!

I should go back to Hubei in a few days, which never belonged to me. The day before I planned to leave, the child's grandfather said that he was unable to treat the child and asked me to take the child away. I agreed without hesitation. The child's grandfather was very angry when he saw my promise and immediately slammed the door.

In the evening, my son and I were sleeping, and the grandfather of the child suddenly rushed in and said that if I took the child away, he would not let me leave here alive, saying that the child belonged to their royal family. Why can I take the child away?

I was speechless at that time. I really feel desperate when I meet such a family.

The next day, I left alone. I never want to go to that nightmare place again. I also asked them not to mention remarriage again, but I strongly disagreed. Also, the child's household registration is in his grandfather's household registration book, and his grandfather has always said that he is the child's guardian, and everything about the child must be approved by him. I am really speechless!

Now I no longer believe in love, but in marriage! Children are a strong spiritual pillar for me to live, and of course my dear parents. I can't let them be sad and heartbroken for me.

Liu Xiaohong, a national second-class psychological counselor, an observer of Jiangxi Satellite TV's "Gold Medal Mediation", deputy director of Jiangxi Parents' Online Psychosomatic Health Consultation Center, chairman of Nanchang Tanghe Hua Kai Social Work Service Center, vice president of Jiangxi Hangzhou Chamber of Commerce, cultural consultant of Jiangxi Celebrity Painting Academy, and spiritual growth consultant of Jiangxi Fuhui Jiayuan Culture Communication Company. Good at marriage, parent-child relationship, family therapy, interpersonal barriers and other psychological counseling. Good at counseling teenagers' pre-test anxiety and personal physical and mental growth.

The following is teacher Liu Xiaohong's reply

Dear:

Frankly speaking, your love story is trite. The world is undergoing earth-shaking changes, and you are still living on your old thighs.

In the rapidly changing digital age, our computers are upgrading, our mobile phones are upgrading, our lifestyles are upgrading, and our thinking and concepts need to be upgraded! I think it is necessary for you to "brainwash" at this moment. Next, I will talk to you about how women in the new era grow up in marriage and love.

First, upgrade your thinking mode. You have gone from love like a moth to "I foolishly chose to trust him" to "I don't think he is worthy of me" and then to "I no longer believe in love and marriage". Your single-line thinking makes you unable to see the whole and the truth of the matter. A person's inner growth depends largely on the upgrading of thinking mode. The more angles you look at the problem, the freer you will be.

Then, if you don't tear down the wall of thinking, jump out of the question and look at the problem, regard yourself as an observer and look back at this tragicomedy, what new insights will you have? If you think this marriage is a gift package from God, open it and see what gift you got.