A group of happy and humorous jokes

A group of funny jokes (hot articles) 1. A long time ago, in computer class, a row of classmates' computers crashed. A classmate stood up and said, teacher, the computer crashed and all our platoon died. At this time, many students said: We are dead, too. The teacher asked: Who else is not dead? Only one classmate stood up and said, I'm not dead yet! The teacher said strangely that the whole class was dead. Why don't you die?

A friend recently bought a car and took us out for a walk. My sister suddenly said to my wife, Sister, your friend drives steadily. Wife: Yes. Look, another bike has passed.

As soon as the robber stood up, he shouted: hijacking! The faces of the passengers around us are all smiling, as if they saw a bunch of glittering Chinese characters on the robber's head: dear, 3 million house, 1 10,000 cash, dear, BMW Audi car, free flight for life, it is estimated that the robber will be kissed to death alive! Every passenger on the flight is waiting for the robber like waiting for the first love.

4. After graduating from college, a macho man sold a second-hand college advanced mathematics textbook, and the advertisement on the side of the book said: 95% new, as evidenced by the make-up test report card!

5. I once went to play ball and met my math teacher. I scored when he played ball. After a while, I deliberately miscalculated the score. The teacher shouted, Did you learn math from the pig? We paused for a while and then laughed for a long time.

6. A couple are sleeping in bed. It's about midnight. There seems to be a noise outside, which woke his wife. The wife was in a daze and quickly woke up her husband. And said to her husband, get up quickly, as if her husband had come back. The husband was awakened by his wife and was in a daze. After listening to his wife, he stood up and said, why didn't you say so earlier? Then where should I hide now?

7. I have been playing well with a girl, but neither of them has the intention of being together. Once we went out for a drink and sent her back after drinking, she suddenly took my arm and said, do you know what you are to me? Just when I was thinking about Youlemei, she said you were my period, and I was tired of watching it.

8. I am a female, 23 years old, and I can't drink well. After drinking a glass of beer, I was very sleepy. One day, my husband bought me two pineapple beers. I drank a whole hall at dinner. After dinner, I didn't want to wash the dishes, so I lay on the sofa and got drunk. Nima's husband pulled me up abruptly and showed me what was on the bottle: this drink contains no alcohol.

9. The biggest gain of internship in Baidu is that you can add wap to copy documents in front of Baidu library, and the biggest gain of internship in Youku is that you can download videos directly in the summer after Youku. The biggest discovery of potato internship is to add it after the video link? Tid=- 1 You can skip the advertisement for 45 seconds. The biggest gain of internship in ICBC is that online banking transfer is cheaper than self-service machine transfer.

10. In today's geography class, the teacher began to talk about Japan. Suddenly he said: Japan is a place where eastern and western cultures coexist, and even a name has been given. For example, the name Maria Ozawa is typical ... Then, the class suddenly quieted down and the atmosphere suddenly became weird.

Group humor jokes (classic)

1. The whole class is sleeping in class. The teacher wants to tease us: A monster ate you all, but didn't eat me. Do you know why? A faint voice came from the back corner: because this monster is a Muslim.

Our dormitory is full of heat. Why is it hot enough to explode? He suddenly broke out. Who is hot enough to explode! ! ! It heats up quickly. .........

3. Yesterday, if you are the one, the male guest asked, if we go out, there are still one or two hundred meters from the car. What if your heel is broken? My first reaction was to jump over the 200-meter box with one leg, or repair a shoe nearby, and then the female guest replied, then you can carry me ~ and then people left hand in hand.

I participated in various preschool classes since I was a child, just to win at the starting line. But why did you lose this application? I lost my career.

On the morning of No.4 Laoshi, Edison Chen, the Shanghai subway shook. When netizens took the subway, they met a man who looked like Edison Chen. Adults, children, men, women and children are scrambling to take photos, especially the aunts, with bright smiles on their faces. It's true. Where is Edison Chen?

6. I saw a joke today and laughed at me. . If you have a button on you, if you press it, it will erase your memory and forget those painful or annoying things. Will you press it? The man of god replied: this is not a question of whether it will happen. It must be: hey, here's a button. Click here to have a button. Click here to have a button. The joke has been getting lower and lower recently.

7. My daughter is four and a half years old, a standard little girl. Dad left the toilet door open when he went to the toilet to pee. The little girl happened to pass by the toilet and turned her head. A wanderer rushed in and said, dad, it's not like that. Come on, I'll teach you. Get down.

8. A sister goes home by train. It is very crowded. She is still hungry. Seeing this crowded aisle, she suddenly had inspiration. She walked with the edge of the instant noodle box, shouting: Be careful not to burn the boiling water, so it is unimpeded. A few minutes later, the sisters turned back and shouted, this time there is really boiled water! There is really boiled water!

9. Every time I see the word hehe in a chat, I want to hold the hose, connect it to the faucet at one end and poke it in your mouth at the other. Let you drink enough! Who the fuck told you to say delicious food?

10. When the class teacher visited the classroom, he found a few lines engraved on an empty desk. He is very angry! The head teacher asked the students next door: Who wrote this? The student looked over his head and saw that it said "Farewell to Cambridge" and said: This was written by Xu Zhimo. The head teacher shouted angrily and told Xu Zhimo to come to my office this afternoon!

Group humor jokes (selected articles)

1. No matter how Tom grows in age, his bride is already in her twenties. This is called being single.

2. After the exam, a buddy said: What's the difference between an invigilator lifting someone's paper and a rogue lifting a woman's skirt! Don't be mean if you know what's down there.

My best friend was recently courted by a diaosi and asked her for coffee. My best friend didn't want to go, so she teased him: I didn't bring my wallet. Diaosi patted her shoulder brightly: Oh, don't be ridiculous, you must have brought it!

My parents quarreled, and my mother left home in a rage. During this period, my father made various phone calls and sent various text messages to comfort and apologize. Mom ignored him. I called my mother and said three words, and my mother went home immediately. Dad kept asking me what I said that worked so well. I said helplessly, admit it, dad, you have fallen out of favor. I just told my mother that I was hungry. . .

There are three deaf people on the bus. During the driving process, two deaf-mute people frequently talk in sign language, while the other person stands by for a while with a sad face. Why don't you talk? Two deaf-mute people asked. I hurt my hand. What happened? I went to KTV to sing songs all night yesterday.

6. The classmate dragged her to see the painted skin 2. When she saw the poster, she complained that Yang Mi was playing the bird again. As a result, she was really shocked after reading it. She really played a bird.

7. Girls are rich. One night, a young man was very kind to her. You are really rich. He kissed her and said. Yes, she frankly admitted that I was worth $6,543,800. Can you marry me? No. I think so. Then why do you ask? I just want to experience what it's like to lose 1 ten thousand dollars.

8. I just saw the senior's black state, and it was broken all over the floor: Don't black Yang Mi again. She saved my life. On June 20xx, 2 1 year, I was in a coma for three months because of a tragic car accident. One day, my nurse turned on the radio, and there was Support of Love, so I got up and turned off the radio.

9. Dormitory buddies downloaded several special effects sounds from the Internet, which are quite realistic. After the lights were turned off last night, the collective brain of the whole dormitory was short-circuited, and firecrackers were set off outside the balcony for a minute. . . Then the people upstairs began to curse, and I shouted, You bastard dare to scold me? ! ! Then the recording of the gunshots was played. After five seconds, the whole building was silent. Half an hour later, five police cars appeared downstairs in the dormitory.

10. A man complained to his friend that life was too helpless: the person I loved refused my proposal. Oh! Don't be discouraged. Friends say that when a woman says "no", it often means "yes". However, she didn't say no, the man said sadly, and she said bah.

Funny jokes about groups

Funny jokes about groups (hot article) 1. A: For 20 years, my wife and I were very happy, but later. What happened? A: We have met!

2. Enlightenment of Spring Festival travel rush craze: The main contradiction in China at this stage is the contradiction between the increasing high-speed rail penetration rate and the backward people's purchasing power!

I was hit by youth, not only didn't apologize, but also pretended that nothing happened. So I gave you a good beating. As a result, my youth was black and blue.

4. First love: I only have her in my heart. Madly in love: my mother told me to go east, and my wife told me to go west; Lovelorn to the west: my lover is married, and the groom is not me.

5. It is said that girls who are full of dirty jokes and fly all over Huang Tu are too nervous to lift their heads and blink when they meet the person they like. Is that you?

6. My friend bought a new mobile phone. Today I asked her: How big is your mobile phone memory card? The girl replied, almost as big as a fingernail.

7. You are a dinosaur, different from others; I am a frog, and I send you flowers. Dinosaur frog, getting married online, leading a miserable life, is him or her next to you.

8. Wave when you feel happy, stamp your feet when you feel happy, and shake your head when you feel happy. Have fun, crazy!

9. Our love is so deep that it never ends, just like picking your nose with your fingers. No matter which finger you use, you won't pick the innermost part.

10. Warning: Hello! Because your mobile phone is ugly and outdated, which seriously affects the city appearance, we decided to send a signal to destroy it.

Funny jokes about groups (classic)

1. The blind and the lame ride together, and the lame watch the road. Suddenly, he saw a deep ditch and shouted: Gougougou! The blind man turned around and sang: Ole Ole Ole! So they fell into the ditch!

2. Holding your wife's hand is like holding your right hand with your left hand; Holding the young lady's hand seems to have returned to 1899; Holding the hand of a female classmate, I regret not doing it.

Ah, your skin is so shiny and your fragrance is so charming. Let me bite you hard, my dear braised pork.

It's the first time for a person to sell popsicles in the market, and he is embarrassed to sell them. A man next to him was shouting: Popsicle seller, so he had to shout: Me too.

5. Warning: Your mobile phone is about to explode due to severe internal changes caused by overload. Please put this prompt in an empty place immediately after reading it.

6. I just saw a classmate QQ on the Internet, and I asked him: Why? He replied: JB. I said, what are you talking about? Pay attention to quality. He added: overtime.

7. You have the face of an angel, the figure of a devil, and even the posture of farting is so beautiful. But in public, can you control the rhythm?

8. You are sitting under a hat, wearing shoes on your head, chewing socks in your mouth and staring at your eyes with your mobile phone in your hand, trying to have fun.

9. On this special day, all the blessings and greetings are in your cup, which is filled with our love, red and deep, until the bottom of my heart.

10. My roommate bought a pet pig and fed it in the dormitory. Six months later, she gave birth to a litter of piglets. Roommates are in a mess, and the dormitory is full of questions: Shit, who did it!

Funny jokes about groups (selected articles)

I heard that you are going to remarry your husband again, right? Yes, I must not let this villain entertain himself at home.

2. Mother Mouse A holds a photo of a bat: This is my boyfriend. Mouse B: How ugly! Mouse A: But it's a pilot.

In the morning, the public security bureau checked the household registration and asked her why she was so thin. I said I miss my girlfriend's idea. Why should I wear glasses? I said I wouldn't meet my girlfriend in Tianjin.

I can only describe your beauty as a vegetable. The face is melon seeds. The waist is willow leaves. Eyebrows are willow leaves. Eyes are longan. The mouth is cherry. Hands are lotus roots.

When applying for the job, a maid said: The reason why I left my last job was because my master and wife had been quarreling, either my husband or my wife quarreled.

6. I am water and you are mud. We were molded into heaven and earth together, and then smashed into pieces in the sun. You and I refuse to grow old in the debris. Happy Valentine's Day on Tanabata!

7. Campus: Students who repeat a grade are called international students, those with money at home are called high-income students, and those who doze off in class are called poor students.

8. A prisoner escaped, and the police officer asked: How did he steal the key? The soldier replied that he didn't steal it. He won at cards.

9. A girl wrote to her boyfriend in the distance: Honey, don't write to me again. Neighbors all think that postman is my boyfriend.

10. Mouse's dream: drag all the cats into the hole and kill them. Crow's protest: Are we black people in the world? Wolf's plan: get a sheepskin and put it on tomorrow.

Humorous jokes are a necessary sentence to amuse your girlfriend.

Humorous jokes make my girlfriend happy. 1. The closed heart is finally opened by you, and the narrow space can only accommodate you. You are the only one in my heart, because there is no room for the second person.

I can't live without you in my love world.

I won't allow you to haggle over every ounce. To be a woman, you have to be open-minded and broad-minded to be happy and obedient!

I want to be with you all day. I think I will be happy as long as you are by my side. No matter what difficulties I encounter, the sky will always be clear with you.

5. two of a kind will spark love, thus burning life and illuminating the journey of life. On the way forward, no matter how difficult it is, there will always be someone to accompany you and support each other. When I am happy, I share my happiness with you, and when I am sad, I share my sadness with you.

6. Whenever I feel depressed, I will recall your little smile and your encouragement, so that I can deal with it strongly. Thank you!

7. You are the one who always supports me when I am in the most difficult time!

8. Actually, I'm always behind you. I just need you to turn around.

Whenever you need me, I will come at once and do my best for you.

10. Falling in love with you is a kind of sweetness, falling in love with you is a kind of romance, hugging you is a kind of happiness, and guarding you is a kind of happiness. Dear, because I love you, everything is full of beauty. I love you for ten thousand years!

1 1. I won't allow you to be disobedient. If you ask me why I forced you to go to the hospital, I will only answer: because you are mine!

12. It has nothing to do with romance. I just don't think I can miss you anyway.

13. Actually, when you think about it carefully, when you don't like someone, it is often the most relaxed and happy time for you. Although I feel a little lonely occasionally, all the time is my own.

14. Listen to me, why do you ask so many questions? I am by your side, and you are still going the wrong way!

15. The best smell in the world is when you are held.

16. When I kept your message and quietly recalled it when no one was around, I knew I had fallen in love with you.

17. Although the world is big, my heart is just a little bit, just enough for you. However, I can't let you out, because I can't get out and I'll get stuck.

18. Dear, will you forgive me? As long as you will forgive me, I will use my life to make up for my mistakes. Just let me pay in installments slowly, and I'll make you happy, okay?

19. Seize the years, even if youth is gone, it will only accompany you.

20. The greatest happiness in life is to find that the person you love just loves you.

Loving you is the theme song of my life, and wind, frost, rain and snow are the melody of loving you. I repeat this song every day, hoping to spend every day with you.

22. Turn on the phone and wait for you, turn off to avoid you, turn off to forget you, and forget the number when it expires!

23. Maybe I don't have the warm love like sunshine or the long love like running water. All I know is that I have always loved you.

24. You always ask me what I like about you and why I like you. I just like you, like your eyes, like your mouth, like your ears, like your cheeks, like your outline, like yours, as long as it is yours, I like it. I like you for no reason or reason, just like the earth goes around the sun, which is what it is.

25. I miss you, regardless of spring, summer, autumn and winter.

26. I keep you in my heart.

27. I miss you very much at the moment. Please take good care of yourself for me.

Looking for you in the crowd is like scooping up all the grains of sand at the seaside, eager to find your trace. If not, I hope there is an afterlife.

I won't allow you to lose weight. My love has nothing to do with your weight. You must firmly believe that no matter what you become, I love you!

30. You brought me the biggest impact in my life, and I will remember this life.

3 1. Loneliness is a cigarette, and missing is a tear. In the misty smoke, I saw your handsome face, as if it were as touching as when we first met.

32. My eyes look at yours affectionately, blue as the sea, too pure to be kneaded into a small fine sand.

33. As long as you are willing, when you are frustrated and need a shoulder, let me know and I will appear immediately.

Even if I endure loneliness, I don't care. You are happy every day, which is also my happiness.

35. After knowing you, I found that I can give so willingly.

36. May every meteor in the sky shine for you.

37. Really, what if I lost you and won the world?

I love you. I know the mountain breeze, the small fish in the water and the birds in the sky.

39. Do you know what I cherish most? This is the first word of this sentence.

40. I think I will still love you as much as I do now in fifty years. Believe me, marry me! Let me prove it!

A happy joke

Teacher: Students, do you know why hens can lay eggs without roosters? The students shook their heads and no one answered. . The teacher pointed to Xiao Ming and shouted, Xiao Ming, answer! ! Xiao Ming said helplessly, why me again? Can you not answer? The teacher proudly said, no, you must say it! ! Xiaoming sighed: Your mother can give birth to you without your father. Teacher: Get out!

A: Boyfriends have everything, including a car, a house and a deposit. B: With a sigh, boyfriends have everything, including bicycles, rental houses and loans. C: With a sigh, boyfriends really have everything, even their wives.

Wife: Just now at Lao Zhang's house, you drank five cups of tea in a row. Didn't you say you couldn't sleep at night after drinking tea? Husband: But if I don't drink fragrant tea that I can drink for free, I can't sleep at home.

Four, a buddy said that he started his business day and night, and when he was about to give up, he came to an interview with a beautiful woman MM. He was so sleepy that he interrupted him and said, "Wait, will you let me sleep first?" MM thought for a moment and said, "Yes, your home or mine?" So this brother saw hope, had the fighting spirit of starting a business, and finally became a model of success.

5. The ugly stroke is 4; Differential stroke 7; Add up to 1 1, which is the reason for single dog.

6. When the junior middle school is in class, the teacher gives a lecture above, and the girls ask for menstrual towels below. The dialogue is as follows: "xx, do you have sanitary napkins? I can't. " "No, I didn't bring it today." "xxx, do you have a menstrual towel?" "No" later asked a woman and a man, "Do you have xx? Forget it, you won't have it. " Women think they are not women, so they stand up and shout, "Who has sanitary napkins?" ! That bitch is dying! "Then there was a war that the teacher couldn't stop, and it was bleeding ~

Seven, friends who have been stuck in traffic for hours can't stand it at last. He angrily opened the car door and took out a long baseball bat. People in traffic jams looked at him in surprise, only to see him curse and hit a snail on the ground, knocking and cursing: I have put up with you for a long time! Follow me from the last intersection, don't you dare overtake my car at this intersection!

8. Today, a BMW 5 Series passed by me, and the woman in the co-pilot looked at me with disdain. At that time, I was not happy I turned around and put my car in front of the BMW. At this time, I almost scared my driving buddy to cry. Apologize to me when you get off the bus: bitch is not sensible, buddy, please put your bike aside and let my car pass first.

Nine, go to the flower and bird market to buy hamsters, and want to try the character of the rat seller, just pretend that you don't know how to ask, "Can two hamsters be locked in a cage?" The rat vendor said sincerely, "No, two people will fight in a cage." I was thinking of meeting a man with a conscience when the rat seller said, "Why don't you buy three, so that someone will stop fighting those two." ...

10. A boy aged1/kloc-0 was accused of getting the girl next door pregnant, and the defendant's lawyer decided to win the case in court with a strange trick. He pulled down the boy's pants in court, took out the boy's sex organs and said to the judge, Your Honor, do you believe that such underdeveloped sex organs can make people pregnant? Suddenly, the little man said, if you don't let go, you will soon lose the lawsuit.

Xi。 Dad is going to travel, and his wife bought him a pair of anti-theft underwear. It is safe to take money with him on the road. Never heard of it, the old man complained, "Who would steal my underwear? Is it necessary to guard against theft?"

Twelve, the water meter at home is broken, and many calls to the water company have failed. One day, I tried my best to call the DPRK again: my water meter was turned upside down. About half an hour, the water company will arrive.

Thirteen, man, do you know why I was scolded that day? I saw an underline under the words on the clothes on the pretty girl's chest, so I reached out my right hand and clicked it.

Fourteen, when I was a child, I liked to put a bug or a dead fly in front of ants. Little ants couldn't move. When it comes with a huge army, I will take the bugs away. Thinking that the little ants who send messages will be beaten by those people when they go back!

Fifteen, take the subway line 5 in the morning and step on the shoes of the girls in front. The shoes were kicked into the subway and she was squeezed out. I can't imagine her going to work without shoes on rainy days. There was no chance to apologize to her because there were so many people. May she be happy today.

One day, a confessor came to the church and said to the priest, Father, I was wrong. The priest said: As long as you admit your mistake, God will certainly forgive you. The confessor said, I stole a man's bike, and now I want to give it to you. The priest said: no! Do not give it to me. Give it back to its owner. The confessor said, I asked him, but he didn't want it. The priest said: then you can accept it! The priest found the bike missing when he got off work!

Sixteen, Bao and Zhan Zhao went to Africa to play and met a group of black-faced cannibals. Cannibals not only refused to eat two people, but also shook hands with Lord Bao and brought human flesh to Lord Bao. Lord Bao is very confused. Zhan Zhao said, "My Lord, cannibals regard you as their distant relative."

Seventeen, two unruly young monks argued about what meat was the best, and the argument was fruitless for a long time. When the master was invited, he smiled and said, The best food must be the Tang monk meat! All the young monks fainted.

Eighteen, a colleague is very thin and has fine ribs. He especially likes fitness and goes there almost every day! One day, while chatting together in the office, someone asked him, "You have no meat on you. What do you do to keep fit every day? " Next to a sister directly interjected: "Healthy bones! So thin! "

19. Just now, I asked my female colleague for a refill, and she took out a box of refills. As soon as I saw that the refill was 0.7 gel pen, I wondered if 0.7 was too thick. Female colleagues say thick is not good, thick is cold, and there is more water!

Go to the vending machine to buy drinks in the morning. After I put in the coin, I pressed a bottle of three drinks, but three bottles came out at once. Then he put three coins for me to swallow. Is this telling me not to be greedy?

2 1. A couple came to the wishing pool. The husband bent down and made a wish, and threw a coin into the well. My wife also wanted to make a wish, but when she bent down, she accidentally fell into the well. The husband was surprised, then smiled and said to himself, "How wonderful!"

Late at night on Valentine's Day, a pair of lingering lovers are very much in love. Feminine tenderness: "I didn't even leave my underwear tonight." I gave you everything. Why not take me home? " Hearing this, the man smiled and replied, "Although you are a sweet and crisp fruit, it is forbidden after all. To be a real person, how can we steal the forbidden fruit and pull out the melon seedlings? ! "

Twenty-three, optimistic girl: I will definitely marry. Pessimistic girl: others will definitely get married. Onlooker man: Who cares if she can marry, as long as she doesn't marry me?

Twenty-four, the master showdown, regardless of the outcome, so the two decided to come back with their own Juexue ten years later. In a blink of an eye, the ten-year deadline came, and when they arrived at the appointed place, their anger was on the verge. Shouted: "then stop talking nonsense and come!" " "Two people poised, secretly exercise. An hour later, the two were still standing in the same place, and suddenly one of them suddenly realized, "What kind of kung fu are you practicing?" The other said, "golden bell jar, what about you?" The man cried and said, "Iron cloth shirt! " "

25. Similarities between wives and computers: We simply don't understand the communication language between computers. The similarity between a wife and a computer: the error prompt means that you don't know why I am angry, so I won't tell you why!

After watching the news, my wife excitedly asked: If you fly into space by Shenzhou 5, what do you want to say to me most? The husband grabbed his wife's hand and said: The earth is still good and attractive!

Twenty-seven, when I was in high school, I secretly changed the number in my classmate's mobile phone to my father. When I was in class, I sent him a text message: Come back soon, son, we are at home100000, don't go to school! The classmate ran directly after reading it, and the class teacher asked him why he went. He said without looking back: Go to * * *, I want you to care so much! I'll be right back. Head teacher: Get out. This cargo has been standing silently outside all afternoon!

Twenty-eight, a mother rabbit hit a tree and was taken home by a farmer who was farming. The farmer who tasted delicious food came to wait under the tree early the next morning, and sure enough, another female rabbit hit the tree. On the third day, the farmer stopped farming and stood under the tree waiting for the rabbit. As a result, he brought back a female rabbit that hit a tree. This story tells us: Female drivers should stop driving everywhere, ok!

Twenty-nine, a beautiful lady got on the bus, took out a tissue from her bag and wiped her seat hard. When she was about to sit down, she farted. A gentleman nearby heard this and joked that the young lady really loves hygiene. After rubbing for so long, she still wants to blow!

Thirty, the men's and women's toilets in the school are connected. A girl forgot to bring toilet paper to the toilet. When she was embarrassed, toilet paper came from the men's room next door. The girl turned pale and asked "Who" loudly. The boy next door replied, "Lei Feng."

31. I am always depressed: You often tell me that an old saying goes, "You can be a gentleman only if you eat bitter." But I want to ask Lao Dou: Why do you only tell me when you are cooking at home, washing dishes and taking out garbage, cleaning, repairing water pipes, repairing cars and pressing your feet?

32. The greenhouse effect of the earth is becoming more and more serious. It's autumn before going to bed, spring when waking up, and winter is over!

Teacher: Why are you late? Student: I was robbed by a robber on the road. Teacher: What did he take from you? Student: He took my homework.

Thirty-four, the young man went to visit the Zen master and begged him to feel at ease. Without saying anything, the Zen master went to chop firewood first, then drew water, lit the firewood in the stove, boiled water in a cauldron, and carefully wiped the teacups one by one. The young man suddenly realized, "You mean, be good at experiencing life from the details of life!" " The Zen master put down his work and said indifferently, "I just went to work and was very busy." Leave me the fuck alone! "

Thirty-five, the school canteen drips rice, which is called strength. It takes a long time to chew a grain of rice. Finally, once I couldn't help protesting to the canteen chef: I said, can you stop being so cruel? Master: Do you think everyone loves soft meals as much as you do? I'll throw you a bowl of rice.

At thirty-six, Xiao Ming came home from the exam. His mother asked him, "How did you do in the exam?" Xiao Ming said, "Only one question is wrong." Mother asked, "What's the problem?" Xiao Ming said, "How much is 3 times 7?" Mother asked, "How much are you?" Xiao Ming said, "I waited for 20.9 regardless of the willy-nilly!" "

The more you learn, the more you know, the more you know, the more you forget, the more you forget, the less you know. Why study?

Thirty-eight, there was a middle-aged male colleague who didn't cut it. Once in a chat, he said that he had been afraid to drink red bull, for fear that he could not help it. We just said it was a functional drink, not a functional drink.

39. Two lovers stared at each other in the restaurant. Man: That's very kind of you. I want to bite you. Girl: I want to bite you too. The waiter standing at the table coughed and asked, What would you like to drink?

Teacher: "please give an example to illustrate the responsibility I am talking about now." Student: "Sir! There is only one button left on my pants, and this button is fully responsible! "

Forty-one, a beautiful woman on QQ said that she had a melon face, which was very beautiful. The eldest brother of the dormitory drooled and went out to meet someone ... In the evening, the eldest brother cried as soon as he entered the door: "The melon face is right, the key problem is that her tip came up!"