Couple routine stories and jokes

Couple’s routine stories and jokes

Couples’ routine stories and jokes, there are always some little fun between lovers. Such routines and jokes can undoubtedly enhance the emotions between lovers and make them more comfortable. The two parties have gotten to know each other better and become closer, so I will share with you the couple’s routine stories below. Couple Routine Stories 1

1. Humorous Routines Suitable for Couples

1. Question: Where can I find a boy who can play the guitar?

Answer: I am, what’s wrong? Acoustic guitar costs 120 per class, drums costs 120 per class, and electric guitar costs 160 per class. Please send a private message to inquire about purchasing instruments.

2. Five stages of grief: 1. Denial: denying gaining weight; 2. Anger: feeling angry about gaining weight; 3. Bargaining: bargaining with God; 4. Depression: finding everything hopeless and depressed; 5. Accept: Face it and accept it, and start buying clothes a size larger.

3. The student conversations heard in the corridor. "Teacher

4. Xiao Li went to drink haggis soup. When he arrived at the store, the boss asked enthusiastically: "Want it to be 10 yuan or 8 yuan?" "Xiao Li said it was 10 yuan. When the meal was served, Xiao Li asked casually: "What is the difference between 10 yuan and 8 yuan? Boss: "There's no difference, just that some people are willing to give 10 yuan, and some people are willing to give 8 yuan." "

5. When I was playing Tetris, my four-year-old brother was watching and couldn't help but remind me: Sister, doesn't it mean whoever stacks the highest stack wins?

6. The supervisor asked the employee during the one-on-one interview: "There is a candle here, how can I make it brighter? The employees expressed many ideas, and the supervisor said calmly: "The methods you mentioned are all good, but I think there is a simpler method - let it burn at both ends." ”

7. A man from a high-risk area in Beijing was detained for fifteen days because he was eager to leave Beijing for a business trip. The reason was that when the airport security personnel asked him to show his green code, he called up the stock trading software in an attempt to get through. .

8. Young people who have just started working should know some workplace skills for getting along with leaders. For example: when the leader comes to you, you should reply "Is something wrong?" "It's both simple and efficient. When your leader assigns you a job, you just reply, "That's it?" "The expression work is very easy and you are completely competent. The leader will say a few words to you, and you will reply, "Are you teaching me how to do things? "Use humorous expressions to avoid being in an embarrassing situation. Master these skills, and your boss will naturally look at you differently.

2. Words to express love between couples

1. If you have a process and an ending, you will feel greedy if you bother with it

2. I will take good care of you and won’t let you cook or become bad. I don’t let you do housework, and I don’t let you like others.

3. I want to accompany you from being new to a sense of belonging.

4. I want to give you tenderness, and I also want to be taken care of by you. .

5. Always doing two repetitive things: loving him and protecting him.

6. The faint smoke in the eyes is also the only companion in the night.

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7. Because you are the only one, I will cherish it with my life

8. Simply put, having you is enough and I will be very happy.

9. I have it. A little dream, to live a simple and down-to-earth life with you.

10. Looking at you with a smile, your smile is as bright as a flower, and I am just bathing in your spring.

3. Chat topics between couples

1. Talk about your first impression of each other

2. Share interesting things and food that happened today

3. The feeling of hugging and kissing for the first time

4. Views on long-distance relationships and cold violence

5. Describe the perfect date in your heart Scenario

6. What words make you sad during a quarrel

7. Do you prefer liveliness or quietness

8. What methods can help you calm down when you are angry?

9. Who will you talk to first when you have something on your mind?

10. The scandal that is deeply remembered in childhood

11. Three advantages and disadvantages of the other person

12. Which one is more important, face or figure?

13. The most touching thing you have done

14. The city you want to settle in in the future /p>

15. Do you have a little secret that you have always buried in your heart? 2

1. Routine jokes suitable for couples

1. "You are 3 .I am 9. Do you know why?”

“Because I am still you besides you.”

2. “Excuse me, classmate, how to do this question”

"Sorry, I don't know how."

"Oh, you can't, then let me tell you."

3. "You must come when I get married. "

"What do you mean?"

"Are you an idiot? What do you want to say at the wedding without a bride?"

4. "Can you tell me what you like? Who?"

"Who do you care, it's not you anyway!"

"Will you die if you lie to me?"

"I lied. , you’re not dead!”

5. Talking about my boyfriend’s advantages

It can be summed up in five words

“He can pick girlfriends”

6. "I must have eaten too much salt today."

"Ah? Why do you eat so much salt?"

"Otherwise, why is it always salty? I miss you~!”

7. “I looked in the mirror this morning, and then I thought of looking for you”

“Why”

“So much As time goes by, you know, every time I see something good, I want to give it to you."

2. How to make your girlfriend happy?

Take her shopping: Most girls have a crazy love for shopping, so if you want to make your girlfriend happy, take her shopping, you just have to pay.

Take her to the amusement park: Many girls have had a princess dream since childhood, so when they are unhappy, they can take her to the amusement park and enjoy childlike happiness.

Take her to the movies: Watching movies is something that many artistic young women like to do. If your girlfriend is an artistic young woman, then she will be very happy if you take her to the movies.

Take her to have a feast: Take her to have her favorite meal.

Take her out for a walk: Walking hand in hand with the rising sun and sunset is a very happy thing, so it is also good to take her out for a walk and see the scenery that you usually don’t notice.

3. How to make girls happy

Ways to make your girlfriend happy include giving nicknames, praising and complimenting, telling some jokes, narcissistically making girls laugh, etc.

1. Give a nickname.

If you have a certain foundation of friendship with a girl, you can give her some nicknames that fit her image. For example, a girl who wears glasses is called a four-eyed girl. If you think she is weak, you can call her a fool or something like that. But be careful, some girls will think these nicknames are very affectionate and cute, and they will bring you closer together, while some girls will think it is mocking, so you have to know how to watch your words.

2. Praise and praise.

The praise and praise mentioned here are joking. For example, if a girl's voice sounds nice to you, you can say something like, "I think your voice sounds nice. Can you record a song for me so that I can use it to treat my dog ??when he gets into trouble?" Fix it." Such words will make the girl feel from good to speechless, and it will often give people the feeling that you are very humorous.

3. Tell her some jokes.

You can collect some jokes that you think are humorous from daily life and tell her in a very serious tone, so that she will think that what you are going to say is a very serious thing, but she did not expect that you said It's a joke, giving her a sense of surprise.

Usually girls will be a little helpless about the change in the ending, but after the helplessness, they are more happy. For example, "People say you are perfect, but I find that you are perfect - both inner and outer beauty."

4. Narcissism makes girls laugh.

Sometimes a girl knows what kind of person you are. When you praise yourself in front of her and talk about some advantages that are inconsistent with yourself, the girl will naturally laugh.

For example, "I am not a prince, but why do so many girls want to be my princess?" or "I am not a RMB, why do so many people like me?" These will make people want to laugh. At this time, you have achieved your goal. Routine Stories for Couples 3

Routine Love Words between Couples

1. If you touch my clothes today, is it material for your partner?

1. Please feel my clothes today. Are they suitable for you to be your partner?

2. Before I met you, I was content with whatever happened. After meeting you, I was content with you.

3. How much I like you, I may not be able to describe it myself. It’s like you are the moon, I am the stars, and the sky is full of stars just for you.

4. I like to sit cross-legged, touching the wine I love to drink, lighting the cigarette I love to smoke, and having you in my arms who love me.

5. I am not only familiar with your name, but also your cute appearance.

6. We have survived a long time, and then we grow old. In my old age and for the rest of my life, the love in my eyes is exactly what you are.

7. Good things like to share with others, but better things just want to be kept privately, such as: you.

8. My love is like the sound of wind blowing across the sea. If you are willing to listen, every sentence means I love you.

9. If humans had tails, which is a bit embarrassing to say, as long as they are with you, they would be unable to stop wagging them.

10. I wish I could grow old together with you accidentally. No matter how many thorns and twists and turns there are along the way, I just hope that the ending is you.

11. Meeting you is the luck of my life, and liking you is the best thing I have ever done.

12. If a thousand people walk by me, I can still hear your footsteps, because others are stepping on the ground, but you are the only one stepping on my heart.

13. I will use all my charms to make you unable to have peace of mind whenever you are not with me in the future.

14. The grass and trees have sunshine and water, the kites have breeze and rope, and I will still have you for the rest of my life.

15. I would like to be your little tail. I will follow you wherever you go. I will enjoy the sunset over the long river with you and walk with you in the misty rain in the south of the Yangtze River. I will follow you for the rest of my life. You, I will travel with you to the end of the world.

16. I hope it’s not life that makes me breathless, but you.

Seventeen. The reason why I am so jealous is not because I don’t believe in you, but because you are so beautiful in my heart, even though you are not that good.

18. In this world, there is never the best, only the most suitable. Such as clouds and sky, breeze and grass, such as you in my eyes, and me in your eyes.

19. Life is so short and the world is so chaotic. I don’t want to quarrel, have a cold war, or regret for a second with you.

Twenty. That day I was walking alone on the street. It was raining heavily and the ground was slippery. I accidentally fell and my heart fell out. It turned out to be your name.

21. All standards are prepared for people you don’t love. When you meet the person you love, your standards are no longer standards. It's like after I met you, there are no standards.