Funny blessing idioms?

① Funny and humorous birthday greetings

1. "Silently missing you deeply, silently blessing you the most sincerely, silently missing you with inseparable feelings, silently caring about you forever in your heart, silently caring about you forever. We are waiting for the Spring Festival to come, silently wishing you a happy Spring Festival, reunion and great joy."

2. "The Spring Festival is here, here are five prohibitions: no one is allowed to pretend to be busy and ignore me, no one is allowed to get rich and forget me, no one is allowed to not help me when I am in trouble, no one is allowed to eat without calling me, no one is allowed to miss me when you are free! Spring Festival hapiness".

3. "Little Piggy is amazing. He sleeps until ten o'clock every day and eats five bowls at a time. No one dares to compare in weight. Where is Little Piggy? He is snickering and looking at WeChat." .

4. “There is fast food for meals, instant coffee, quick-frozen drinks, and quick training courses. Today’s society pays attention to speed, so my blessings must be sent to you as quickly as possible. I wish you a happy new year. Happy! All the best."

5. "Good sisters: I wish you no pimples on your face and no streaks on your body. I will be twenty this year and eighteen next year. I will always be a flower. Hurry up. Give birth to a fat baby!"

6. "Please use one second to forget your worries, one minute to think about the New Year, one hour to spend with your lover, and one year to experience life! At the turn of the old and the new, please use a smile to Receive my best wishes to you! Happy New Year."

② Funny Blessings

1. I remember when we were in school, everyone called you "weird pig". You called you "weird pig" too many times, and you felt unbearable. Finally, One day, when a classmate called you a nickname again, you exploded: I am not a pig! Haha, Happy New Year!

2. This investment, that consumption, this money making, that money spending , earn slowly and spend quickly. Quickly think of ways to make money and think of various ways to save money. I wish you unlimited money! Haha, happy New Year!

3. The instructor is a cat and I am a mouse, so I have to stand upright like a tree. The buddy next to me refuses to admit defeat and insists on being strong, punching and kicking two of them. Ya, I hope the students will train hard in the military, develop their endurance, and live in harmony with the instructors. Haha, Happy New Year!

4. I am busy with work in the three autumn days, my salary does not increase at the end of the month, and money goes too fast. My heart is panicked when the moon shines, and money should be at your disposal. You must know that it is difficult to make money, and it is difficult to spend money. Only when you learn to save money in moderation and learn to manage money can you be rich. May you, the talented one, be rich and prosperous, and may your wealth and salary be prosperous. Haha, Happy New Year!

5. Exercise weight loss doctor: "The only way to get rid of your excess fat is to exercise → exercise as much as possible." A: "Nonsense! My wife keeps talking every day, but she The lower bar has always been two-story. "Haha, Happy New Year!

6. In the kindergarten, there was a little boy who was building blocks but failed. A little girl next to him said friendly: ''Let me help you. '' After hearing this, the little boy turned his head with disdain and said: ''Go, women don't have to deal with men's affairs!'' Haha, Happy New Year!

7. A man and a woman were talking on the phone. Man: Can our relationship be saved? Woman: A button on the phone. The man was overjoyed: Really? The woman: No, it’s hands-free. Haha, Happy New Year!

8. In the frosty weather, I give you three treasures to keep out the cold: warm gloves to make you smart and handy, warm vests to make you feel full of spring, and soft shoes to make you walk as fast as flying. I wish you good health and eternal happiness during the frost season! Haha, Happy New Year!

9. My wife loves to eat fruits. Once when I was walking home with my wife, she insisted on buying a few kilograms of apples to take home. I said don't buy them because there were still a few kilograms of oranges at home. My wife replied: "Can oranges taste like apples?" Haha, Happy New Year!

10. The instructor looked at a student who was standing loosely in a military posture and said, "Standing in a military posture" It embodies the soul of a soldier. ’ The student was dissatisfied and asked, ‘Instructor, am I standing without a soul?’ The instructor said, ‘You are standing like a corpse resurrected’.

This is dedicated to the freshmen standing on the front line of the military posture. 'Happy military training!' Haha, Happy New Year!

11. When I was a child, I dreamed of holding hands with the prince and walking into the palace of happiness. I found that besides Zhu Bajie, I was still Zhu Bajie. O(∩_∩)O Haha~ Just go with the flow! Haha, Happy New Year!

12. A waterfall flows from the corner of the mouth at one year old, clothes are worn at two years old, snot flows into the mouth at three years old, and snot flows into the mouth at three years old, and I have dreams at night at four years old. This person is young and hopeless and will have a low IQ when he grows up. What I am saying is that you still insist on seeing it to the end. I admire you. I admire you! :) Haha, Happy New Year!

13. I have never worried about money. When you have no money, you feel panic, when you make money, your hands feel sour, when you spend money until it hurts, you realize that making money is not easy, and you have no choice but to spend money. I wish you happy spending money and no worries about making money! Haha, Happy New Year!

14. The process of making money should be hard, the process of spending money should be happy, and you should regret it when you run out of money. You should be eager to make money back. If you want to make money, then smile, because a smile is worth a thousand dollars, the more you smile The more you earn! I wish you happiness every day and make money every day! Haha, Happy New Year!

15. Making money is average, practice it, don’t play around, and you won’t get away with what you deserve. Be generous with your money, control it appropriately, and be unobtrusive, not that you don't force it. I wish you a broad heart and a lot of money! Haha, Happy New Year!

16. A child secretly climbed up a fruit tree and picked an apple. The garden owner saw it and shouted, "Little guy, what are you doing?" The child took the apple and said, "An apple has fallen. I want to climb up and hang it up." Haha, Happy New Year!

17. In order to spend money, you fall in love with making money. Because making money is hard, you dare not spend money. My friend, I know your difficulties, and I would like to wish you a prosperous business and a successful career. Congratulations on getting rich! Haha, Happy New Year!

18. The physics teacher talked about the principle of electricity: "Friction can generate electricity. For example He said that if you touch the cat's fur backwards, you can see sparks of electricity. "Oh my God," a little girl shouted, "how many cats must the power station have!" Haha, Happy New Year!

19. In the office, Ah Ju was sitting and smoking. His boss saw him and he said angrily: Isn’t it company policy? Smoking is not allowed while working. Ah Ju: Because of this, I don’t have a job when I smoke! Haha, Happy New Year!

20. Ah Ju stood in front of the paper shredder at a loss. Ask the secretary: How to use this thing? Secretary: Easy. As he spoke, he took the thick stack of reports from his hand and stuffed it into the shredder. Aju: Thank you, where did the copy come from? Haha, Happy New Year!

21. Have eaten enough, drank enough, it’s time to go to bed, don’t snore, it affects the quality of sleep, tomorrow morning There is a queue of people waiting to buy your fresh pork! Haha, Happy New Year!

22. Impulse is the devil, and the devil is also romantic. The tortoise looked at the mung bean and looked at it, and the tortoise was determined to eat the mung bean. If you are not full, you will have only one trouble; if you are full, you will have countless troubles. You left gently, it would be better if you didn't come. Haha, Happy New Year!

23. The photographer asked Xiaodai how many seconds he needed to prepare. Xiaodai obviously stretched out three fingers, but why did the photographer press the shutter button immediately? Because Xiaodai stretched out three fingers. : middle finger, ring finger and little finger, that also means OK! Haha, Happy New Year!

24. When I miss you, I don’t dare to call you for fear of hearing your voice; it’s so sad Yes, I always miss you, but I can't always stop playing. So, I excitedly picked up my phone and dialed you, hello? Why isn’t it you? I’m so dizzy! It turns out my phone is in arrears! Haha, Happy New Year!

25. You said you? , I bought lottery tickets, but I didn’t win five million; I went to find a partner, but I didn’t meet a fairy; I went to work, but I always worked overtime. Let me teach you a magical way to get lucky. Keep it a secret. If you tell others, it won't work. That is - stepping on dog shit.

Haha, Happy New Year!

26. Troubles have been fired, sorrow has been defeated, unhappiness has fled, failure has been written off, success is noisy, happiness is laughing, wishful thinking is shrouding, auspiciousness is shining, and blessings are surrounding , happiness comes to report! Haha, Happy New Year!

③ Short and funny blessings

Blessings:

1. May you tolerate the imperfections of life I can withstand the ups and downs of the world, and even if life is sincere, I still hope that the years will be like songs

2. May the south wall you bump into become a smooth road. May the despair you encounter become blooming

3. Don’t be sad, don’t look back, everything you wish for will eventually come true.

4. May you tolerate the imperfections of life and withstand the ups and downs of life. Even if life is sincere, may the years be like songs.

5. You must pursue you forever. Don’t be cowardly or timid about the things you like, you have to have your heart set on it and declare it once and for all

6. Peace and joy, everything will go well, week after week.

7. I met a boy I really like this spring. His appearance made me let go of my past. Now that I am no longer with him, I wish him peace and happiness in the future.

8. Then I wish you all the best.

9. You must always pursue the things you like. Don’t be cowardly or timid. You must have a goal and a clear life.

10. A collection of heart-warming wedding blessings for besties 1-1. Yue Lao entrusted me with a dream, saying that he would take good care of you two and protect you for a lifetime of love and affection, so that you could grow old together happily. , I wish you a happy wedding!

2. I wish you peace every second, love and affection day and night, health day and night, be free and unrestrained year after year, and be happy forever and ever, all the time. Engraving scenery and scenery, life will be smooth and smooth.

3. On this festive day, the air is full of charming sweetness. I wish my dearest good sister, forever in love from now on!

4. Finding her in the vast crowd is obviously a fate that happened thousands of years ago. I wish you both happiness and harmony.

④ Humorous blessings

1. Time makes people appreciate the charm of waiting, and space makes people feel the beauty of caring. Many times the blessings between people do not need words to express, just at this moment you quietly read the message I sent you.

2. Don’t ask me how deeply I love you. Go and bask in the scorching sun. The sun represents my love. Don’t ask me how long I love you. Look up at the lonely starry sky. The moon represents my love. Heart!

3. Don’t ask me how deeply I love you. I really can’t tell you. I just know that you have become a habit in my life, an indispensable habit, every day, every day. I don’t eat or sleep, but I can’t miss you.

4. When I don’t want to wake up, the desk lamp projects only my lonely figure on the wall.

5. The moon on the first day of the lunar month is crooked and crescent. The person who misses you is so lonely. The moon on the 15th day of the lunar month is round and round. It’s hard to sleep at night without you. Tonight’s moon is shy. I miss you before I send this message. Fa, I miss you so much, I love you so much, the moon represents my heart!

6. Once upon a time, there were two people, one was called pretending, and the other was called disappearing. They disappeared in one day, and pretending happened to see a group of people there. When there was a fight, he went over to fight and said: I'm asking for help! The group of people were stunned for a moment and said: Are you pretending? Yes, I am!

7. Senior brother, the second senior brother's meat is now better than The master's is still expensive!

8. Life may occasionally have troubles, but your mood is the most important. Of course it's good to have bright sunshine, but it also needs to be seasoned by wind and rain. It’s nice to have beautiful spring scenery, but the four seasons have to take turns. I quietly convey my blessings, I just want you to smile happily.

9. The girl opposite looked over and said, *** I’m just starting to fall in love and I need you to give me some love.

10. On the plane, the crow said to the flight attendant: "Bring me a glass of water!" The pig learned the same lesson: "Give me a glass of water too!" The flight attendant threw the pig and the crow out of the cabin, and the crow smiled and said to him The pig said: Are you stupid? I can fly!

11. I really want to hold you from now on, hold you tightly, and walk to God.

12. Maybe I don’t have a love as passionate as the sun, nor a love as long as flowing water. I only know how to love you constantly and do my best for you.

13. Marry me and I will flush your toilet with oil, bathe you with Pepsi-Cola, and take you to and from get off work with a Boeing 777. Promise me?

14. Jokes are the starting point of happiness, lies are beautiful lies, gossip is the experience of life, and love words are the contribution of love. No matter how great the pressure is, you can find the source of happiness. . May you be in a good mood every day!

15. Looking at you smiling, I suddenly realize that I am really the happiest person in the world.

16. The blue sky is special to you, and I miss you helplessly; the white clouds are lovely to you, and I miss you helplessly; the green wind is far away from you, and I am lovingly waiting for you. ; The soft rain is romantic for you, and I am missing you when I am lonely!

17. Silent longing is deep, silent blessing is the most true. Silent yearning is inseparable. Silent concern is always in my heart. , silently waiting to meet you. Silently, I miss you too deeply, too deeply.

18. Promises betray promises, knives betray lingering, tears betray eyes, and my turn betrays my heart

⑤ Humorous blessings

Missing you is a very happy thing; seeing you is a very happy thing; loving you is what I will always do; keeping you in my heart is what I have always done.

⑥ Please compile the most classic, funny and awesome blessings

A boy says to a girl: I am the best, I promise to make you happy, just follow me. ——This is a sales pitch.

The boy said to the girl: My father has three houses, follow me, and they will all be yours from now on. ——This is a promotion.

Boys don’t express their feelings to girls at all, but girls are fascinated by the boy’s temperament and demeanor. ——This is marketing.

The girl doesn’t know the boy, but all her friends praise the boy. ——This is a brand!

⑦ Funny exam blessings

On exam day, you should be able to eat and sleep like a pig, and be able to pull and run like a horse. He can drill and run like a mouse, jump and jump like a monkey, and finally he can't run away like he is wanted and is admitted, and then live happily ever after!

The title on the gold list, winning three yuan in a row, winning the first prize in the Toad Palace, the plenary meeting on the questions, and all the questions were correct!

You are going to take the exam today, and I want to send you a lucky text message. It is said that if you receive such a text message on the day of the exam, you will get a satisfactory score. I wish you good luck in the exam!

In fact, I know what my younger brother is, and I have never revealed it to others. There is a saying that "the secret must not be leaked." I have long seen that my elder brother is going to be promoted, so I will make an exception and leak it here. Congratulations in advance on your promotion!

It doesn’t matter too much, just one sentence will do; it doesn’t matter if the love is deep, just one will do; if you are young and promising, you will succeed in your youth; keep up your efforts and climb to the top. Congratulations on your promotion!

⑧ Ask for New Year blessings, funny, humorous and creative

1. The sound of firecrackers gradually fades away, and friends say goodbye to their things. The New Year's holiday is over, and a new chapter is waiting for you. Cheer up your spirit, set your ambitions, and make a bright future with vigor and vitality. If you work hard and don’t fall behind, you will have a career that everyone will envy. I wish you a new year and a new atmosphere, and your ideals will come true as soon as possible!

2. Money or no money, as long as you are happy, have a house or not, as long as you are happy, have a car or not, as long as you are happy, have power or not , as long as it’s safe. The New Year of 2018 is coming. I wish you peace, health, happiness, joy and happiness.

3. The sound of firecrackers ignites the festive day; the sound of laughter signals the beginning of the new year; the sound of greetings reveals sincere care; the sound of blessings conveys sincere wishes: Happy New Year Good health and boundless happiness!

4. The years are like poetry, and every sentence is melodious. Friendship is like a song, and the lingering sound lingers in the air. Warm season, full of longing. Dear friends, Happy New Year!

5. Drink this cup of wine in the New Year and be drunk with memories. Family and friends celebrate together. Sweet happiness surrounds your heart. Wife, virtuous son, filial career, prosperous, happy and good life. Have a happy new year.

6. As the New Year arrives, I cut a bouquet of spring flowers and give it to you. I wish you: a happy spring breeze and a good mood; a peaceful spring and a peaceful summer, good health; spring flowers and autumn fruits, good work; a garden full of spring scenery, good luck. May all your wishes come true and everything goes well!

7. The bells of spring ring and the New Year steps forward. I wish the bells of the New Year ring the note of happiness in your heart, bringing you luck and peace, just like spring. Follow closely in your footsteps! Spring flowers and autumn fruits, I will always be with you!

8. On this New Year’s day, let my blessings float like snowflakes, and let my greetings be like the continuous spring rain, the fragrance of flowers, silent blessings, heartfelt words, and caring voices. Full of joy, I send happy notes to you!

9. Collect the joy of blooming spring flowers, the enthusiasm of summer, the wisdom of falling autumn fruits, and the joy of dancing snow in winter, just to give them to you when New Year’s Day comes. , I wish you all the best and good luck.

10. My blessings are riding on the auspicious snow in winter, carrying the scenery of the four seasons, bathing in the warm sunshine, crossing thousands of mountains and rivers, guiding the way with thoughts, speeding up with concern, expressing with text messages, just to be on time. Send your sincere heart. Happy New Year to you!

11. All the glory and wealth in the world is not as good as a close friend. In this day of bidding farewell to the old and welcoming the new, I wish you all the best!

12. May happiness linger, opportunities seize every day, good health, good luck, and happiness as expected. Here comes, let the friendship accumulate over time, I would like to express my heartfelt words in a few words, I hope your family will be happy during the Spring Festival and everything will go well!

13. I will not give you gifts this New Year, but I will send you a text message. May health and happiness be with you forever, happiness and contentment stick to you, and I want to tell you that the God of Wealth has set his sights on you.

14. I wish you a good start to the new year, a rosy cheek welcoming a prosperous love, a red festival that warms your red heart, a rosy face, and good luck.

15. I wish you lots of wealth, lots of happiness, lots of wives and concubines, lots of children and grandchildren in the new year. I wish you the envy of Wei Xiaobao and the jealousy of Ximen Qing.

16. As the Spring Festival approaches, let us feel the true love with our hearts, melt the ice and snow with love, and warm each other with blessings. There are no gorgeous words, only sincere blessings. I wish my friends a happy Spring Festival!

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17. Fill your cup with the happiness of the New Year, may you be happy; use the fireworks of the New Year to bloom your sky, may you succeed immediately; use the blessings of the New Year to warm your heart, may you be happy As one wishes. 2018 is here, I wish you a happy New Year and stay beautiful forever!

18. The bells of spring are ringing, and the footsteps of the New Year are stepping forward. I wish the bells of the New Year ring the happy notes in your heart, and may luck and peace follow closely like the footsteps of spring! I will always be full of spring and autumn fruits. Be with you!

19. Fireworks, trees, silver flowers, fireflies wall, electronic screen Spring Festival Gala. The bright red lanterns illuminate the sky with happiness, and the flowing fireworks last night. I wish you a happy Spring Festival and good luck in your career and love. May you continue to make money and become the boss of Heaven. The days are getting more and more prosperous!

20. I made a wish to God: I wish you to be young year after year, loved by everyone every moment, have a decent and stylish job, and have money come with the strong wind, and live in a villa and mansion looking at the sea. BMW sports cars drive fast. Happy Spring Festival! The Year of the Horse is here, and I want to give you a red envelope, but I'm afraid of spoiling the trend; I want to treat you to a shopping trip, but I'm afraid that just looking at it will lead to formalism; I want to accompany you to have a tooth ceremony, but I'm afraid of being hedonistic.

Then I’ll send you a text message to wish you a happy New Year and a happy family!

⑨ Funny birthday wishes

Funny birthday wishes:

1. Happy birthday to you, your kindness makes this world Become more beautiful, may this day that belongs to you bring you happiness, and may the days ahead be even better!

13. The sunlight adds maturity to you, and the moonlight adds to your charm. As your birthday approaches, may the blessings of your friends become the source of your happiness...

⑩ Send a message The most humorous greetings for you

1. Don’t say I’m ruthless. Anyway, I sent a ten-cent text message, wasting battery power and risking my life by electromagnetic wave radiation. In this way Regardless of the consequences, I just want to wish you a happy New Year! Happy New Year!

2. Happy New Year to you, good things will chase you, your supervisor will pay attention to you, illness will avoid you, cars will give way to you, and planes will avoid you. You, my lover, love you deeply, pain will stay away from you, happiness will follow you, and everything will go with you!

3. Don’t move! Raise your hands, stand on the left if you know me, stand on the right if you don’t know me, if you want to laugh in the middle of the station. Talking about you! Put down your phone quickly, stand against the wall with your hands on your head, and listen to me carefully: I wish you a happy new year. I have not met you on New Year’s Day and New Year’s Eve, you have not made an appointment for late-night supper and morning tea, and you have not been with me before and after holidays. We are not destined to meet and reunite for the time being, but our thoughts and dreams are endless.

4. There will be surprises after reading it in one breath: I wish you five blessings, six or six successes, a colorful life, majesty on all sides, concentricity, perfection, hundred years of happiness, thousands of miles, and endless destiny. Happy New Year from Jiafei. I send you a carefully prepared New Year gift! Wrapped with colorful moods, loaded with colorful blessings, wrapped with sweet expectations, filled with festive joy and happiness, and delivered with auspicious snowflakes.

5. The imperial edict arrives: By God’s blessing, the emperor summons: Since you owed me thirty cents during the New Year last year and still haven’t paid it back, I will punish you not to poop for three days, and you are not allowed to bring paper when you poop. It’s only three feet, until I suffocate it to death! Here, get the paper!

6. There is something I have never dared to say to you, but if I don’t say it in the New Year, I will have no chance: You are really annoying—— People like it, and you will never get tired of it! Finally, I would like to add another sentence - Happy New Year!

7. During the Spring Festival, you will have a strong wind of money, a rain of money, and a hail of gold. Silver hail, diamond ice, emerald trees, pearl frost, and agate fruits, be careful not to get smashed! Happy Chinese New Year!

8. On New Year’s Eve, there is constant cheer; it’s inconvenient to bother with phone calls. ;SMS greetings for the New Year fulfilled my wish; I wish your whole family good health, a happy life, and more money in the coming year; I wish you an early New Year's greeting to avoid busy lines!

9. If you are alone now, I wish you a Happy New Year; If it’s two people, happy New Year; if it’s a group, please tell me where you are.

10. If having money is also a mistake, I wish you make the same mistake again and again! Happy New Year!

11. One pound of peanuts and two pounds of dates, good luck will always follow you; Three kilograms of apples and four kilograms of pears, good luck will never be separated from you; five kilograms of oranges and six kilograms of bananas, wealth will roll into your pocket; seven kilograms of grapes and eight kilograms of oranges, may all your wishes come true; nine kilograms of mangoes and ten kilograms of melons, may you May happiness bloom in the Year of the Rabbit.