I admit, I can’t let you go

Predecessor, the dictionary definition is the person who held a certain position before the person who held it. Originally this word was used in the workplace. I don’t know when it started, and I don’t know why. “Ex” means ex-boyfriend/girlfriend. Later, it was also quoted in many movies, such as "The Ex" and "The Ex Raiders".

The debate topic in the third issue of "Qi Pa Shuo" Season 3 is "Should I go to my ex's wedding?" where "ex" refers to the ex-boyfriend/girlfriend. Those who support the relationship believe that they are still friends after breaking up, and will still give blessings; those who oppose the party express their unwillingness to bless them, feeling that it is their ex showing off. There is another saying: "I found that he only had eyes for her. At that moment, I felt that the emotions I had let go of hurt me again."

When men and women interact and fall in love, sometimes For various reasons, the two will eventually break up. The sweet memories of your first love may become painful when you look back on them.

But someone has said that to truly like someone is to watch them live happily.

Regarding love, everyone has their own choice, which is their true feeling. There is no right or wrong.

Regarding ex-boyfriends/girlfriends, we often hear questions like this: My ex-boyfriends/girlfriends contact me, should I reply? Or if my ex-boyfriend/girlfriend comes to get back together with me, should I consider it?

This problem happened to a friend of mine recently. Her first love came to her via email and wanted to add her on WeChat, but she hesitated whether to go through. Most of my female friends expressed strong objections, thinking that this was being used as a backup. I didn’t show much emotion, I just said I would. If I still like her and she contacts me, I will of course be happy. Some people may think this is mean, but liking someone sometimes means being mean.

This topic reminds me of the 2012 movie "Chunjiao and Zhiming" directed by Peng Haoxiang. The story of the film is a successor to "Zhiming and Chunjiao". It tells the story of lovers meeting each other after breaking up. Chunjiao’s choice in the story is also a situation.

Zhiming, who works in advertising, forgot to celebrate Chunjiao’s mother’s birthday due to work reasons. Zhiming was going to work in Beijing, but Chunjiao was not invited. Because he had to shoot a commercial, Chunjiao and his friends changed the place where they had barbecue, and the chicken wings that Chunjiao grilled for him were also given to his clients. All kinds of behaviors made Chunjiao feel that Zhiming didn't value her, so she moved back home. Later, Zhiming went to Beijing, and the two broke up.

The cosmetics shop where Chunjiao worked in Hong Kong was closed, and her boss transferred her to Beijing. This led her to meet Zhiming again. Originally, she said that she would scold him with bad words when she met him, but when they actually met, she said awkwardly: "Long time no see."

Chunjiao first sent a blank text message to Zhiming to attract his attention. Then just like in the first movie, we contacted each other through text messages many times and then went on dates. I won’t say much about the specific plot.

I want to talk about some of Chunjiao’s confessions to Zhiming in the movie.

When Chunjiao and Zhiming went to a place for a tryst, Zhiming asked her why she liked that old man. She said: "Maybe from the beginning, I wanted to find a man who was completely different from you. That would be safe." Feeling."

When talking about when SAM, played by Xu Zheng, fell in love with her, Chunjiao mentioned that SAM took her home one night. On the road, they saw someone washing a car, and Chunjiao asked: "What are they doing?" SAM said: "Wash the car." Chunjiao thought it must not be as simple as washing the car, and maybe they were destroying corpses and removing traces. SAM fell in love with Chunjiao because of this incident and felt that her life was very different from his previous life.

At this time Chunjiao said to Zhiming: "I really wanted to find a man who was completely different from you, but unknowingly I became exactly like you. I felt terrible. I was attracted by you It affected me so much that I didn’t even know it was affected by you. I tried very hard to get rid of Zhang Zhiming, but in the end I found that I became another Zhang Zhiming.”

What Chunjiao said was exactly the same as Zhiming’s. In "With Chunjiao", Zhiming once told Chunjiao that the vendors who buy stickers on the street at night are looking out for people selling drugs. Originally this was an idea that Chunjiao despised. Chunjiao's confession makes people think that she really likes Zhiming.

When two people fall in love and live together, their concepts will collide with each other and influence each other. Perhaps those who give more love are the ones who are more affected, because they tend to make more compromises and concessions.

And this influence is subtle. Only when we leave each other will we notice the changes in ourselves.

There is also a confession that sounds even more sadistic. Zhiming found out that his new girlfriend Shang Youyou was involved in a car accident and her hand was injured, so he ended his date with Chun Jiao. I originally planned to go back and have a look, but Zhiming never came back. Chunjiao left a voice message for Zhiming.

She said: "You don't have to come back, I'm leaving. Or maybe you never thought about coming back, because you have already chosen. I admit, I can't let you go. I often ask myself, you What have you done for me? I can't think of anything. Yes, I like you very much. I like you so much that I'm scared of you. But I want to tell you, if you don't do something tonight, you will never have the chance to do it again in this life. Zhang Zhiming, just be kind and let me live. Don't look for me again and don't bother me anymore. . I like you very much, but so what? I understand, I really understand. Why don’t we end it here?”

“I understand. Admit it, I can't let you go." These words are a bit helpless, showing Chunjiao's emotions. She likes Zhiming even though he has done nothing for her. What she mentioned, "Some things don't need to be done all in one night" was a sentence from Zhiming that moved him in "Zhiming and Chunjiao". And now she said, "If I don't do something tonight, I will never have the chance to do it again in this life." I think the "some things" here are different from the previous "some things". The latter refers to making love between lovers, while the former refers to making decisions about emotions. In the movie, Zhiming seems hesitant and does not love as devotedly and passionately as Chunjiao. He could easily fall in love with stewardess Shang Youyou and blame Chunjiao for finding SAM.

Finally, Chunjiao said, "Just be kind and let me live." Her tone was pleading, and she looked so humble when she said this. Zhang Ailing once said: "If you like someone, you will humble yourself into the dust, and then bloom." I saw Chunjiao's humbleness, and I also saw the flowers that bloomed - she made a brave decision and wanted to be with Zhiming. It's over, I don't want to force it anymore.

However, I know that if Zhiming changes his mind and pursues Chunjiao, Chunjiao, who loves Zhiming deeply, will still accept him. That's exactly how the movie ends.

Back to the topic at the beginning of the article. I'm not trying to support my friend in accepting contact from his ex, just discussing a situation in a relationship. If you really like him, then admit that you can't let him go. Like is like, this is our most real emotion.

Dai Wangshu wrote in "Occurrence": "These good things will never disappear, because all good things will always exist. They will only condense like ice, and one day they will be as heavy as flowers. "Open." "Good things" originally refers to the optimistic spirit of the Anti-Japanese War years, but I think it is equally suitable to refer to love.

I admit, I can’t let you go. If you come to me again, I will welcome you with joy. Because my emotions will bloom again like flowers when I meet you again.