Humorous short message quotations to his wife

1, you should deepen your exercise and keep fit. Fortunately, we came home one night and carried me to the door of the fifth floor. I long to be your bride every day.

2. Husband, you should work hard to earn money. Money can't be so little that we have to worry about our lives all day, and Excellence can't be so much that we need other charming women to spend.

Say "I love you" to me at least three times a day! When you wake up in the morning, when you come home from work, when you go to bed at night.

When I feel unwell, you should pretend to be a doctor, touch my forehead, take my temperature, and then send me to a real doctor for medicine and injection.

Send the gift to my office suddenly and let everyone know your love for me.

6. When I am in a bad mood and lose my temper, please kiss me, husband, and don't argue with me.

7. Never yell at me because you say I am your favorite person.

8. Please cook me a delicious meal when you are free, and slowly stare at me at the other end of the table.

9. Do housework with me at the same time on weekends! I love the feeling that two people roll up their sleeves and sing at the same time.

10, try to go home after work every day. Business is a must for communication, and so is my wife.

1 1, please don't be sentimental. I feel that many women are interested in you and show off to me. Just like that beautiful girl who moved here, you always say that others like to look at you on the balcony. Later, we all knew that she was cross-eyed. Please remember this mistake.

12, please don't peek at my old diary and love letter, it's none of your business, and don't be jealous of it, it's tantamount to jumping into the vinegar jar yourself.

13, please don't protest against my watching soap operas. If I cry, I can't laugh at you, because I didn't laugh at you when your football team lost the game and your eyes were red.

14, please walk with me once a week: take me to the teahouse or bar to meet my friends every two weeks; Go to a movie hand in hand with me every two months; Travel with me at least once a year.

15, please remember five major events: wife's favorite food, wife's favorite color, wife's favorite flowers and plants, wife's favorite perfume and wife's favorite song.

Please remember five major anniversaries: wife's birthday, first meeting anniversary, wedding anniversary, Valentine's Day, and Women's Day on March 8th.

17, please remember three memorial sites: the first acquaintance memorial site, the first intimate contact memorial site and the marriage proposal memorial site.

18, I hope that when I am on a business trip, it will not appear that the pager and mobile phone are out of power together. In case you can call me often and ask me, "Have you eaten?" It is better to report your whereabouts from time to time.

19, please give me care, credibility, respect and freedom. Please treat my family like your own relatives and friends. Without my parents, how can I be there? Therefore, you should be grateful and respectful to them.

20. When you introduce me to a new good friend, please hug my waist instead of standing by and guiding me with your hands.

2 1, I met a beautiful woman in the street for less than 5 seconds, and quickly pointed out the big shortcomings of the beautiful woman compared with me.

22. A swimming coach is shopping in the mall. A beautiful lady greeted him. He looked intently and found that it was one of his students. He then said loudly, "You really didn't recognize you when you put on your clothes!"

23. A pair of flies and their mother are eating. The son frowned and asked his mother, "mom, why do we stand on the stool every day?" The stool is so dirty! " Mother said, "Don't say such unsanitary things while eating!" " "

24. Zhang Sheng has lunch with the girl he likes. Suddenly, the girl shouted "Zhang Lang" and Zhang Sheng fainted happily. When he woke up, he found half a cockroach in his bowl.

25. A beautiful young woman asked a fireman, "You must have worked hard to save me from danger, didn't you?" Fireman: "Yes, I beat off three firemen for this!" " "

26. A couple were walking down the street, talking about sexual harassment. Suddenly, the man reached out and touched the woman. M: Is this sexual harassment? Woman: Please! It's outside now! Man: Do you have to put your hand in?

27. Pig Bajie was severely beaten by Spider Essence. Looking at the spider's back, he complained: for love, even if you disfigure my face, it's worth it.

28. A bean fell. It's discouraging and frustrating. This bean is me. What can encourage it to stand up? The answer is you! Because there is something called pig encourages (chocolate) beans.

29, how much love, you can start again. The Supreme Treasure teaches you a trick: take your box of biscuits to the balcony at night, and then shout to the moon: Boruo Bomi.

30. A bird sings only once in its life. It sings the song of life on the thorns. A person loves only once in his life and can give up everything to die.

3 1, the same eye has different opinions, the same ear has different listening methods, and the same heart has different ideas. The world can be a better place if you want to!

32. I met you by chance, paid attention to you after two meetings, missed you for three times and four dates, and I should like you for 90%. I'm sure I love you.

If you want to make progress in life, you should remember your wife's advice. If you want to succeed in your career, your wife should blow the pillow talk. Your efforts are my motivation and my guarantee of happiness, wife, happy every day!

34, the new three from the four virtues: the wife must go out, the wife obeys orders, and the wife must blindly follow the mistakes; The wife has to wait for makeup, remember her birthday, be willing to spend money, and endure beatings.

35. Think about your feelings: cooking without salt; Apples should not be too sweet; Smoke less; Forgot to bring money when shopping. I will miss you when I have time, and I will miss you when I have no time. If I really can't spare the time, I'll do nothing but miss you!

36. I finally caught you, how could I let you down easily! Because at that time, there was only one thought in my heart, which was to protect you. If I die like this, don't be sad or cry!

37. My favorite lover is a tycoon. One day he will drive a BMW and bring a diamond ring to marry me. I can guess the beginning, but I can't guess the end ―― because I'm awake!

There is only one good wife in the world. How happy it is to have a wife. If you throw yourself into your wife's arms, your mistress won't. Being without a wife is the most distressing thing. I feel lonely and miserable. Where can I find food without my wife's arms?

39. If I were a fox and you were a hunter, would you chase me? If I were tea and you were boiling water, would you soak me? If I am a car and you are a driver, will you drive (marry) me? If you are money and I am a passbook, I will definitely marry you.

40. If a drop of water falls from the sky, it will be a tear I miss you; If two drops of water fall from the sky, it is that I love you and am ecstatic; If there are countless water drops in the sky, it is … stop dreaming, it's raining!

4 1, if a thousand-mile trip can only accompany you through the storm, I don't ask how true it is to hold your hand before and after, and how true it is to meet and leave the desolate world. The vast sea of people just wants to have a sincere one

42. Wife: Honey, I dreamed last night that you bought me an 8,000-yuan necklace. You must realize my dream! Husband: As luck would have it, I just dreamed last night that I bought you a necklace of 8000 yuan.

43. I seem to be still, as if awakened from a deep sleep, and I began to move. Are you really in front of me? Do you really breathe, talk and laugh in front of my eyes?

44, you little goblin, let me be poisoned by your love poison but refused to give me the antidote! Little villain! Oh! I'm dying! Help me! The solution is simple: give me your love!

45. You and I are both one-winged angels. Only by embracing each other can we spread our wings and fly. I came to this world to find you, only to find out after trying to find you: mom! Our wings are on the same side!

46. The beauty was shocked: swimming is really good. Xiao Xin: Mei Jing, you are becoming more and more like a fish. Mei Jing: You mean like a mermaid? Xiao Xin: No, you have more and more crow's feet!

47, wife, I miss you, send text messages to harass you, I really want to kiss you and hold you in my arms. I don't know where it is at this time, so I have to keep it in my heart!

48. Wife: Thank you for every meal and every dress you cooked for me. You know, the real feelings are only those that can stand the dull time!

49. Wife, you are the other half of my life. I look forward to an early extension of our life! I will take good care of our children, my wife and this family with my sense of responsibility!

50. On Tanabata this year, the Cowherd and the Weaver Girl quarreled. Weaver Girl complained: We only say a few words a year, which is too painful. I want to break up with you! Cowherd got angry when he heard it: I also want to send you a text message with my mobile phone, a necessary chat tool for couples! But on this day, there is no cell phone signal!

5 1, dear idiot wife, I love you, because my world is bright with you. If I lose you, my world will be like the end of the world. ......

52. This is not a threat. You said you were going to leave my life. You have an idea. How can I stop you from doing good? It's just that nobody's texting these days is embarrassing, which affects my mood. I'm afraid you are in a bad mood, too! We all ignored each other when we quarreled, and he sent me a message.

Even if the seas run dry and the rocks crumble and the sun burns the rocks to ashes, dear, I will always love you as long as I live.

54. Provide a beautiful environment and build a bridge for your development; Create a warm atmosphere and pave the way for health. I will help you in your glory; You gave me what I wanted. Please keep in mind my hard work and the lucky road to the world famous dog!

55. Has the baby arrived home? What to eat tonight? I bought a pair of beautiful shoes for my baby! Kiss!

56. At any time, my blessing is your best specific medicine. It has no pigment, no preservative and will not expire. After taking it, good luck will always appear!

57. May you be as kind as Lei Feng, as hardworking as Yu Gong, as smart as Cao Chong and as bulging as Fok Ying Tung. Good luck will always be with you! Ambiguous messages between lovers wish you happiness every day! Have fun!

Don't ask me how much I love you, I really can't say it. All I know is that you have become an indispensable habit for me. I can eat and sleep every day, but I can't miss you.

59. Although I can only put my thoughts in the distance now, my heart has not changed direction. Memories are sweet | Honey has lingering sadness, just because you are not around. Every day is always a worrying thing.

60. Let the stars become my eyes and care for you all night; Let the breeze turn into my smile and caress your heart; Let all the beautiful things become my blessings, always with you, always …

6 1, the wind and rain are ruthless, people are affectionate, and I keep thinking about you. Although I don't see you often, I will miss you as usual. I will send a message to chat with you and build a bridge for this friend. There is nothing to send you, so I have to say, I miss you!

62. Your smile quickens my heartbeat, making me relive that beauty every night. Fate makes you hug me, making me afraid to be late, and giving you a report of love every day.

63. I like white, just like your pure face, which proves that I am not lustful; I like purple, just like your noble temperament, which proves that I am not vulgar. I believe I deserve your love.

64. Aladdin's magic lamp will be knocked over occasionally. The devil asked me what I wished for. I said, I want to be a pair of birds with you, fly freely in the sky and live in the whirlpool of love forever.

65. My missing is a magic rope. The more you struggle, the tighter you get. My love is a trap. The deeper you love, the more blind you are. If you are not careful, you will fall into the deep well I love!

66. It's another year of chrysanthemum | flowering, the flying petals are wonderful, it's another year of chrysanthemum | flowering, who will bury the falling tidbits? It's another year of chrysanthemum | flowers bloom, and the feelings of loving you are in full bloom!

67. Alone in loneliness, my heart and tears wander, weaving colorful dreams at a loss; Inadvertent encounter, let us embrace sincerely, I want to carve a smile into your sky!

68. All beauty comes from sincerity and frankness. Although happiness will be fleeting, it will last. A sincere blessing, a sincere greeting, and ambiguous short messages between lovers wish you happiness every day!

69. I have 100,000 I love you, and I give you one every day, which can be divided into 273 days and 355 days, but we can't live that long, so I will continue to say: I love you in the next life!

70. When the first ray of sunshine in the morning illuminates the earth, I breathe fresh air and the breeze blows on my face. I am so happy that I can't help praying: I hope you can be happy today!

7 1, the hardest thing in the world is family, the hardest thing to find is love, the hardest thing to return is friendship, the hardest thing to separate is family, the hardest thing to find is true feelings, and what I want to see most is your smiling face!

72. The face fades with the years. True love remains the same because of true feelings, like you because of sincerity, and fall in love with you because of sincerity. Once an eternal promise is made, it will last forever. Please believe me, I will bring you happiness.

73. Thousands of thoughts are frozen in the air. Raise the wind to blow to you, with my blessing, I don't care about loneliness, I am satisfied with your happiness, and thinking of you is my happiness!

74. Your beautiful figure is always in front of me; Your beautiful voice is always in my ear; Your fairy eyes twinkle in my heart ... Yes, I miss you all the time.

75. When everything becomes the wind, I am still waiting here; When the world has changed, I still stick to the original; Who taught me to be the stupidest person in the world and only know how to be nice to the person I like?

I hope you will be a star in the sky, and I will love you all my life. I hope you become a baby on the ground, I am proud of you, and my happiness is concentrated in my heart. I wish you peace and good luck in your life!

I haven't seen you for a long time. Are you still like that? Say a few words once in a while and hang up. Rare short message, the moment of light hair, just know: I miss you.

78. I accidentally remembered our memories. Are you still at the end of fate? Where is friendship when the leaves turn yellow in autumn? Tell you gently: I still remember you!

79. Time stops, I am your day and night, and the world collapses. I am your spring, summer, autumn and winter. If the years get old, my concern is your happiest witness!

80. Looking up through the close time and space, I will think of you. Just like today's breeze occasionally blows off a leaf or two. When the wind blows to you, don't panic, that's when I say I love you in the distance. -

8 1, recalling the days when we were together, I can't help but feel heartache. Didn't we agree not to separate? How dare you leave me like this! ?

82. Recalling the days when we were together, I feel hazy. Your youthful body always comes to my dreams with moonlight, which makes me worry.

83.* * * is a kind of hope. This hope may turn into disappointment. * * * means pain and transition. When hope is dashed, * * * is over.

84. It is said that the earliest love poem was written like this: You are from Yuanmou, Yunnan, and I am from Zhoukou, Beijing, holding your furry little hand and biting your mouth gently, ah! It is love that makes us walk upright!

85. Distance can separate people, but it can't separate hearts, no matter where you go. My heart will always be with you. You stole my love and my heart. I've decided to sue you in court. What should I sentence you to? The judge searched all criminal records and cases, and finally the jury unanimously passed: I sentence you to be mine for life.

86. How long can a meteor fly? I know I can't pursue it; How long can cherry blossoms last? Don't know where to wait; But I only hope that you and I can last as long as beautiful stars, which is worth keeping for a lifetime.

87. It is my life's fault that I didn't hold your hand. No matter at the ends of the earth or just around the corner, you are the deepest miss and pain in my heart!

88. Every snowflake falls, every fireworks is lit, every second flows, and every miss is delivered, which represents every blessing I want to send you: Happy Valentine's Day, romantic every night!

89. If you open the window, my blessing will float in with the wind. You open the curtains, and my blessing will come in with the sunshine. When you turn on your mobile phone, my blessing will ring * * *.

90. How are you at home? I'm bored, come on, smile, please see: if you are a flower, I'd like to be that cow dung; If you are cow dung, I would like to be that fly. If you were a fly, I would like to make an egg with a seam.

9 1. If a star falls on your head tonight, please don't worry. This is a gift from my little fairy, and you will live a carefree and happy life from now on, because you are stupid!

92. On this special day, I have nothing else to say, just want you to know that every year today, you will receive my blessing, feel my love and love you forever!

93. I feel my heart, think of it, see it, smell it, hear it, people feel it, hands feel it, feet feel it, say it, do it, get it, it's time, your gift hasn't arrived yet. Please pass my blessing to me first.

94. I think of you quietly every day. On windy days, I laugh at falling flowers. I chose you, and you chose me. This is our choice. So, let me miss you from now on …

95. A tourist came to a country road and saw a road sign that said, "This road is closed, so you can't move forward." Seeing that there are no obstacles ahead, he is confident that he has rich travel experience and moves on. Soon, he found that a bridge was broken and had to turn around. When he came to the place where the road sign had just been placed, he saw the back of the road sign saying, "Welcome back, fool."

96. I miss you in a quiet corner. Twenty-four hours and one second later, I found it covered with bright red roses, and each flower said: Dear, I miss you!

97. Look at the opposite MM, look at it, look at it, the message I sent is wonderful, please don't pretend to ignore it; Call back, call back, call back, don't be scared by my voice, in fact, I am very kind.

98. The heart often tries to copy your smile in memory. Today, it just wants to copy a complete you, and then say to you, Happy Birthday!

99. I am glad to receive your unexpected gift on my birthday. Yeah, I'm so warm. I really appreciate your kindness.

Happy birthday, dear! I miss you very much, especially on your birthday. I remember those years when I lit candles for you, sang birthday songs for you and made wishes with you, which really made me have endless memories. Do you remember? Remember to eat longevity noodles, I want you to live for two thousand years!

10 1, the world has a beautiful love world because of roses! Because of the blue sky, we have the dream of flying! Because of me, I have your love! Because of you in the world, I wasted a dime on information, and you pay the bill.

102, whenever I am alone, whenever I am happy, I will think of you and want you to double my happiness.

Finishing: zhl20 1704